She’s sitting and hugging her knees on her window sill staring at the darkness provide by the night. I knock softly on her door and let myself enter her room.

“The door is open.” I clear my throat to start a conversation with her.

HyeRrin’s doesn’t budge, she keeps on staring into the darkness from her window.

I grab a chair from her desk and position it next to the window for me to sit on.

“HyeRin-a, I know you’re mad at me. I know how betrayed you feel at this moment. I also know my apology alone won’t be enough to console the pain I caused you.” I try to make eye contact with her, but she consistently ignoring me. “I swear to you, I didn’t know about your connection with her.”

HyeRin hugs her knee tighter, still trying her best effort to ignore me.

“I was desperate, HyeRin-a. We’re getting married and we’ve tried everything we could to find a perfect donor for her—even when she got one, it wasn’t the perfect match and her body rejected the organ. That’s how your sister’s life ended. At the time, the offer seemed to be the only way to bring her back to life. I never knew I’d fall in love with you along the way, I didn’t think it will be this complicated in the end.”

Tears have welled up on her eyes, I don’t know how much tears she has shed because of me today, I want to stop her pain, I want her to understand that I don’t plan to proceed my original plan anymore.

“The first time we met,” She finally speaks up, her voice has become raspy from crying too much, “Was that the day you lost her?”

I nod silently next to her. “You believe my story?” I can’t believe she actually believe me.

“I chose to trust you.”

“I was selfish HyeRin-a. I only thought about my loss without considering your situation.”

“Why oppa?”

“Ne?”

“Why it took you long enough to reveal your intention?” she starts sobbing once more, “If you told me from day one I would have stay away from you—I wouldn’t let myself fall for you. Did you know how annoying it was to hide my feeling to you? Did you even know how guilty and sinful I felt for falling in love with someone else’s man?”

I get up from my seat and step closer to her.

“Don’t come closer.” She snaps, “It’s her all along. IT’S HER! I SPENT MY CHILDHOOD ENVIED BY EVERYTHING SHE HAD!! EVEN AFTER I GOT AWAY—FAR AWAY—FROM HER, SHE STILL MANAGES TO GET INTO MY NERVE. AND NOW YOU WALTZ YOUR WAY INTO MY LIFE—A LIFE THAT HAS MERCY ON MY POOR SOUL—AND YOU’RE HERE FOR HER SAKE. WHY DOES EVERYTHING HAS TO BE ABOUT LEE HYEMI?!! DON’T I DESERVE TO BE LOVED TOO?” HyeRin has stop playing it cool, she let go all anger she has inside of her while she’s shouting on top of her lungs to me.

I stand at my place, only able to look down on my feet. I’m too ashamed to face her.

“Please leave my room, TaecYeon-ssi. Please don’t make it harder for me.” She burries her face in her knees, crying ever harder than she already is.

“I can’t leave you like this.” I ignore her warning and wrap my arms around her.

HyeRin caught up in the moment as she places her hand on my shoulder. She completely throws herself at me, allowing me to grab her while she’s crying her heart content. She squeezes the back of my shirt really hard and I feel my chest is getting warm by her tears that had piled up.

“I’m sorry HyeRin-a, I’m very sorry.” I keep mouthing the words in her ear as I kiss the top of her head repeatedly.

“It.. hurts.. so bad…” She mumbles in between her cry.

“I’m sorry I cause you pain. I’m sorry.” I can’t help my tears from falling. I never thought I’d be able to crush someone as bad as I crushed her.

***

I put her on her bed and wrap the blanket to cover her shaky body. She’s been through too much today and has lost all of her energy crying.

“Will you stay until I fall asleep?” she holds my hands to keep me near her.

I look at her eyes, I can’t believe she’s still being nice to me even after what I’ve done to her. Those pain I cause her earlier didn’t seem to bother her. She tried to push me away few times earlier but in the