Seulgi didn’t like the feeling, not one bit. She didn’t like not being in control of her own feelings, so when her heart raced during her lip lock with Wendy, she was afraid, so very afraid because she had never felt this way when she kissed other girls. She knew what she had with Wendy was very different from the start, how there wasn’t any physical craving for the other girl, but the urge to protect her. Seulgi knew it right from the start, but chose to ignore it, until inevitably, the wake-up call that came in the form of a kiss. It shocked Seulgi so much that she pushed away Wendy immediately after.

Irene had been very patient the past few days, just visiting and watching her, waiting for her to say something, to explain the situation at hand. But it seemed like the older girl’s patience had run out, as she stood in front of Seulgi’s bed, folding her arms and glaring at the younger girl, demanding for an answer.

Closing her eyes, the younger girl sighed. “I’m… scared unnie…”

The older girl looked at her intently, as if asking her to continue. “Whenever I’m with her, my heart… feels like it has gone on a F1 car. And my stomach feels like there’s a whole garden of butterflies in there. And the worse thing is, I don’t even know why I feel that way.”

Irene knew exactly why Seulgi felt that way, but felt that it was better left unsaid and let the other girl figure it out on her own. Love wasn’t rocket science.  “Then you go and find her, hang out around her so much until you understand why you feel that way.”

--

“Seulgi-yah, Wendy is waiting for you in the living room.” Jungok whispered to Seulgi as she made her way into the house.

After considering Irene’s advice, Seulgi picked up her courage to text Wendy to ask for a meeting at her house. Too nervous to wait for a reply, the former went out for a jog to relieve her stress. The bear-like girl frowned. The Canadian girl was a few hours early from their appointed meeting time, but more than anything else, Seulgi was still not ready to face the other girl. Heaving a sigh, Seulgi nodded and waved Jungok off.

“You are early.” Seulgi said as she sat down nonchalantly on the couch.

“I’m only able to make time now. What do you want to talk to me about?” Wendy said coldly.

Seulgi flinched inwardly. The happy, optimistic Wendy Son was gone, now replaced with this unfeeling, cold, detached girl in front of her. Seulgi felt uncomfortable and guilty, knowing that she was the cause of it. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes.

“If you have nothing to say, I’m leaving.” Wendy said and gathered her things. Before she could leave, Seulgi tugged on her arm and she found herself falling onto Seulgi’s lap again, just like the other time when she got rejected. Struggling to get up, Seulgi tightened the grip on Wendy’s hand.

“Just stay still for a while, please.” Seulgi said as she looked at Wendy straight in the eyes. Sweeping a loose strand of hair away from Wendy’s face, Seulgi could feel Wendy recoiling from her touch. The slightly older girl sighed.

“Please listen carefully to what I’m going to say. I admit that at first, when I saw you, I thought of you as another one of my flings. But as time progressed and I get to know you more, things start to change. I have never felt what I did with you with other girls. And honestly, it scares me to death. So please, don’t leave me until I figure out why I get all the butterflies and a heart disease when I’m near you.”

“Well funny how you are saying that when you are the one who had been pushing me away.”

The atmosphere suddenly turned colder by a few degrees, but Wendy wasn’t fighting against Seulgi’s grip anymore. “I know, it’s all my fault, I just… I was scared okay? I haven’t felt anything like what I feel when I’m with you with other girls. I have been only thinking about myself and my stupid fears that I didn’t take into account that you will be afraid and scared too, and adding to that you have to deal with me acting like a jerk. God I’m just so…”

Seulgi was stopped by another pair of lips on her own. Wendy’s. She pulled away and looked at the older girl as she wiped the tears off the older girl’s face. Looking at the older girl, it was the first time Wendy saw such a vulnerable look on the usually confident Seulgi and her resolve about wanting to reject the older girl as revenge crumbled. Seulgi’s cheeks with her thumb, the younger girl sighed.

“Just… don’t push me away anymore, okay?”

Seulgi snuggled into the crook of Wendy’s neck and nodded furiously. “Never ever. Just slap me if I do that again.”

Wendy laughed and placed her arms around the bear’s neck. “I like you too much to do that, you idiot.”

--

“Moa-yah, why are you here?”

Seulgi fidgeted a little under Joy’s glare. “I’m here to pick Wendy up.”

“Let her in!” Wendy shouted from inside. Talking to Seulgi now, “I’ll be out in a minute!”

Joy reluctantly stepped aside to let Seulgi in. Seulgi gave a small smile of gratitude and settled herself on the couch in the living room. Sitting on the chair opposite, the younger girl stared intensely at the older girl. Turning to check that Wendy was not coming out any time soon, the younger girl stated, “Don’t hurt Wan-unnie anymore. Do you even know how much she cried the other time? If you hurt her again I’m going to…” Joy lifted a fist. “Ohwu seriously,”

Seulgi could only laugh at the younger’s threat that wasn’t in a least bit scary. “I got it. You just take care of Irene-unnie.”

Joy blushed. “Why are you bringing up baechu-unnie here?”

“Okay I’m ready to go!” Wendy interrupted.

Turning to look at Wendy, Seulgi’s rebuttal was long forgotten. The Canadian girl was wearing a simple knitted sweater with jeans and although it wasn’t much, the girl still looked stunning all the same, all the time actually. Seulgi smiled and stretched out her hand to connect with Wendy’s.

“Let’s go.”

--

The two were in a shop eating ddeokbokki. Seeing Wendy’s grimace, Seulgi frowned. “What’s wrong? Not to your liking?”

“I can’t eat spicy stuff well.” Wendy replied, gulping down a cup of water.

“You should have told me! Then we could have gotten something else to eat…” Seulgi said, regretting the decision she made.

“But you like it! So it’s okay.” Wendy gave a reassuring smile and wiped Seulgi’s mouth. “Aigoo you clumsy bear, you got sauce all over your mouth.”

The action immediately put a smile on the bear like girl’s face. “Okay, next time you choose the place to eat!”

The two continued to eat while playfully shoving and poking each other, until Seulgi suddenly turned to hide her face from Wendy. When the other girl whirled around, Wendy immediately burst into laughter after seeing Seulgi. The bear like girl intentionally smeared sauce all around and was pouting out while facing Wendy.

“Seungwan-ie~ help Ddeulgi get the sauce off her face.”

Wendy cringed at the aegyo and showed a fist towards Seulgi. “Do you want a punch?” She threatened, but still picked up a tissue to help Seulgi wipe .

“Yay thank you Seungwan-ie!”

“Stop calling me that Kang Seulgi!”

--

The two then continued walking around on the streets while holding hands. Although they have no destination in mind and it was in the middle of winter, the fact that they had their other half beside them was enough to warm their hearts and bodies up. Glancing at Wendy, Seulgi saw that she was rubbing her lips furiously with her free hand. Giving her lover a bemused look, the bear like girl asked, “What are you doing?”

“My lips swelled because of the spicy ddeokbokki just now.” Wendy replied, still not ceasing her action.

Seulgi stopped her, holding Wendy’s hand firmly. “Don’t do that, it will make it worse.” Smiling, she leaned in towards Wendy and quickly gave the shorter girl a peck on her lips. “There! Much better, isn’t it?”

Wendy blushed and hit Seulgi’s arms. “Gross.”

“Only for you.” Seulgi said and winked.

--

Stopping in front of Wendy’s apartment block, the two were still holding hands, both reluctant to let go. Taking a step to stand in front of Wendy, Seulgi tugged a loose strand of hair behind the shorter girl’s ear. Leaning in again, she could feel Wendy freeze as she squeezed her eyes shut. It wasn’t her original intention to kiss her, but seeing the younger girl’s adorable reaction, Seulgi couldn’t resist but to give a light peck before moving away again.

Slowly opening her eyes again, Wendy could see Seulgi in front of her grinning like an idiot and a cold sensation around her neck. Looking down, she saw a necklace hanging around her own neck and picking it up to look at the design, Wendy saw that it was a bear necklace with the initials ‘SG’ carved on its tummy. Shooting up to look at Seulgi, she saw that the girl was holding on to a silver chain just like hers, but it was a snowman necklace with the initials ‘SW’. Speechless, Wendy just stood there, trying to think of something to say.

“It’s… beautiful…” Wendy said as she fiddled with the necklace.

Seulgi’s smile immediately widened, turning her eyes into crescents. “I’m glad you like it.”

The two stood there, just basking in the moment, neither wanting to let go. Finally after what seemed like a few good minutes, Seulgi finally squeezed Wendy’s hands, signaling that it was time to go.

“Well… I really enjoyed today.”

“I did too.” Wendy replied.

“So… I will see you soon?”

“Yeah…”

While Seulgi was in the car and Wendy in the lift, all they could wish for is for ‘soon’ to quickly make its appearance.

A/N: FLUFFFFFFFF HOW WAS IT HURHUR (i personally like it a lot and i died a few times writing this x_x)

i hope you guys like it as much as i do xD

idk if i portrayed why seulgi pushed seungwan away enough for you guys to understand why she did it, but i hope it's good enough!

if you guys don't understand i can try to explain it again in the next chapter's a/n or smth :)

but of course happy birthday son seungwan, wendy!! (i would want to call her my bias but sobs seulrene bias wrecker so it's really hard T__T)

nevertheless i still love you all the same and never change! always stay this derpy and cute and happy :)