Blooming

Minyu's laughter fills my ears and her smiley face is all I can see. I'm losing at every game we play but I don't care because she's having fun and so am I. I'm laughing at my own clumsiness. I know I'm better than this, but I get distracted and lose track of what I'm doing.

She is, by nature, a very clumsy girl but she also always tries her hardest and that's one of those qualities I love about her. She's so strong and she'll fight until her body gives up, and even then her mind will still try. That's so admirable and I think that seeing her being like that also made me try and try again to reach her with my feelings. I got rejected over and over again, some times she did it even unconsciously, but I kept trying. I couldn't give up. I felt that if I wanted to be worthy of her I had to try my hardest.

But not even that was enough for her.

What did Taekyung do? How did he win her heart? He mistreated her, he isolated her, he pushed her away, he rejected her... And she always came back to him. Was it because he was so awful all the time that those few times in which he was nice made a difference? Was it because she thought he was the only one who knew about her secret? But I found out first. What if I had told her about it the moment I did? What if I had been the one who protected her openly? I did, I was always looking after her but I never thought she had to know, I just wanted her to be safe. Maybe I should've told her. Or maybe I should've offered to share my room with her instead of being pissed because she ditched me for Taekyung.

If I could go back and fix all the wrong things I did, all the wrong choices I made... I wonder if I'd still be in the same place. I wonder if one day I'll stop asking what if.

"Oppa, are you all right?" a voice asks me and I blink in surprise, slowly coming back to the present. Minyu is looking at me with worry in her eyes still holding the stack, no more discs on the air hockey table. I look at the board and realise she scored them all. I don't remember even playing. No wonder she seems worried, I completely zooned out.

"Mianhae, I got distracted," I say and she furrows her eyebrows, not buying my excuse. "Wanna play again? This time I'll be serious," I offer but her expression won't change.

"Oppa, if you have somewhere to go or you don't like it in here, we can go somewhere else. Maybe you're not feeling well with the ice cream," she ponders and I shake my head. The only problem is my greed because I still want her, because even being her best friend is not enough for me. I want more, I want all of her.

"I'm perfectly fine. Let's play again, shall we?" I ask and don't wait for a reply, I insert more coins for a new game and soon all the discs are on the table again. Before she can make a comment, I start playing and this time I focus on it.

Soon her laughter is my reward and I try to focus on only having fun with her. I end up laughing, too, fighting to score more points than she does. Finally, I win one match and I celebrate throwing my arms in the air.

"Yes! Finally," I exclaim laughing and she does the same. "It was my turn to win, you haven't given me a break."

"I'm amazing," she sings-song showing off her muscles and that only makes her look funny so we both burst out laughing. "What next? Baskets?" she asks and I nod so we head to that one.

She hands me the balls so I can throw them and make baskets as fast as I can, but we start to get too anxious and we drop the balls and scream because we are losing time and it's all chaos. Minyu can't stop laughing and that makes her even clumsier and we finally lose because we can't make it in time.

"Mianhae," she says laughing and I doubt she is actually sorry. Not that I care, though.

"It's fine, it's fine," I tell her grabbing her wrists so she can stop rubbing her hands. "Let's find another game," I say instead and she nods her head vigorously.

But we can't make it to another game because her mobile goes off and we stop on our tracks. I let go of her wrist, I hadn't even noticed that I was still holding it. She takes the gadget out and looks at the screen and I can tell by the way her face lights up that the one calling is Taekyung. I feel the jabs of pain in my heart as my spirit sinks because, once again, he interrupts us in the perfect moment, and I mean that with the upmost sarcasm.

"Hyung-nim!" she exclaims and I turn around because seeing her face is hurting me now. "Oh, you're home. No, I went out with Shinwoo-oppa," she tells him and I grin imagining Taekyung's expression right now. "We came to the arcade! We're having loads of fun. I didn't even notice it was this late," she laughs and my smile changes. I'm happy she's had a good time with me. "Now? But--" she complains and I don't need to listen to the other end of the line to understand what he's saying. He wants her there now. "Okay, but we haven't finished here, Hyung-nim. I want to stay a bit longer with Shinwoo-oppa and then we'll go back home, arasso?" I turn around with my eyes widen in surprise. Did she really say that? "But I don't wanna leave yet, Hyung-nim," she pouts. "I'm really having fun here. I just want to stay a little bit longer." I can't believe what I'm hearing. She wants to stay here with me longer, she doesn't want to go to Taekyung yet. She's not ditching me for him this time. What... What's happening? "Fine then!" she then hangs up and she doesn't look pleased.

"What happened?" I ask still dumbfounded.

"He told me I didn't have to go back, that I could stay here forever if I wanted," she tells me and I sigh. I'm not surprised he said something that harsh.

"Let's go then? So you can make up," I suggest ready to leave but she shakes her head.

"No. I'm having fun here and I'm not gonna leave you just because he called now, right? That's not nice," she says and my surprise only increases. "I did that to you too many times and it was unfair. I'm sorry," she says and I don't even know what to say. "Let's keep having fun, I'll deal with Hyung-nim later."

I can only blink, awestruck with her words. This is not the same girl that I met. She would've never noticed the things she did to others when running towards Taekyung. She never meant harm, but she was never aware she was hurting others. Now she knows, now she's aware and I know that's because she's experienced the world. She's seen what's out there. She's changed. She's bloomed and I think she's even a more beautiful rose.

"Let's go," she calls and it's her now grabbing my wrist and dragging me around. My smile grows with every step and my heart beats stronger than ever. I, however, try to fight the hope rising in my soul because even if she's changed it doesn't mean I have a chance now, but I can't defeat that part of me. It still grows inside, a new-born hope that things might work out for me this time but I shouldn't think like this. She's with my band mate. I shouldn't want her.

But I do, I cannot lie.

She spins around and gives me one of those beautiful smiles that make my heart skip a beat. I didn't think I could love her more, but I was wrong.

I was so wrong.

It's been so long since I've enjoied writing a story so much. It's very simple but I can't stop writing it! I hope you are also enjoying it.

Bel, xx