We arrive at the restaurant and I sit on the seat Kibum reserved for me, beside him. 

Before the dinner is served, I excuse myself for a comfort room break. I just really need to get out of there and breathe. Since Jjong and I left the parking lot, he just seems restless and avoid contact as much as possible. I don't know. It is somehow suffocating me. I think Kibum notices it too, since he goes with me.

"Everything alright?"

Kibum asks me.

I wash my face three times before answering, "I hope so."

Kibum hands me his clean towel and offers a small smile of comfort.

"Thank you Bummie. I don't know what to do without you."

We are going out when I hear Jonghyun talking to someone.

"Please! I don't want Jinki to see her!"

"Hyung, what do you want me to do?"

Is that Minho?

"Anything Minho! Please help me!"

"You're panicking."

"I don't know what else I should do. Hell, I don't even know what I'm doing right now! Please! You've got to help me. You're the only one I know who can help. I don't want to hurt Jinki."

I hear Minho sigh. "I'll try hyung. I promise you, I'll try but I can't guarantee anything."

Kibum made a motion of confronting the two but I hold him back. 

He looks at me. I shake my head.

"Then just.. I don't know. Sit between me and Jinki. I don't know! Just do something!"

Then I hear Jonghyun going back in the restaurant. Minho follows him shortly.

"Sit beside me and Taemin, Jinki." Kibum says with an obvious controlled anger. I don't want to argue with a pissed Kibum but I think I'm just too confused to argue with anyone in particular.

Kibum holds my hand and leads me out. I can't see Jonghyun and Minho anywhere. He sits me beside Taemin and he sits beside me. When the two players arrive, Minho sits beside Kibum and Jonghyun sits beside him. Kibum ignores the two and acts nonchalant as he continues to talk with Taemin and the other players while trying to include me to the conversation.

Dinner is served. 

However, I just can't concentrate on my food. I just don't have the apetite to eat right now. I just want to go home.

"Don't you like the food, hyung?" Taemin asks me.

"No. I-I like it."

"Then why don't you eat?"

"I'm eating." I eat a little but give up after another try.

Taemin continued eating, though. Kibum nudged my shoulders then he stands up catching the attention of everyone.

"Oh, please excuse me. I am not feeling very good right now. I am very sorry but I feel like I need to go home now. I am really very sorry."

"Are you okay?" Minho asks. Then he tries to feel Kibum's forehead but Kibum avoided Minho's touch.

Then he kicks my foot.

"A-ah! I-I'll drive you home!"

"Great!!" Kibum said with a hidden sarcasm. "Let's go now."

Then he holds my arm and drags me out of the restaurant.

"Thank you Bummie." I said once we're alone inside the car.

"No prob. You needed it." We are silent for a while after that.

"Jinx, get me home. I think you need some space right now."

I sigh. Then I start the engine and drive towards Kibum's apartment.

Neither of us say anything after that until we reach Kibum's place.

Kibum hugs me. "I'm here Jinx. I'm always here for you. Don't forget that." Then he went out of the car.

I rest my head on the steering wheel for a while. My mind is full of thoughts. I am just so confused right now. 

I decided to cool my head for a bit so I drive myself to a place where I could just think- school. 

I lied to the security guard on duty just to be allowed to enter the campus beyond the curfew time. Even though I felt bad lying, I just desperately need to be completely alone to think.

I immediately park my car then headed straight to my destination- to the large tree behind the library. Going there, I could feel it's getting colder and little drizzle touches my skin and face.

I sat under the tree and just stared up the dark sky and let my mind wander off. I remember the memories from the day I was assigned as the basketball team's manager to today's game. I smiled when I remember the happy and smiling faces of the players, coaches, students and Taemin when we won.  But after that, what happened? We are happy right? So why? Just... 

why?

I suddenly feel a liquid touch my cheeks. I look up. It's raining now. 

I hear my phone ringing. As I check it, I saw the name of the person I don't want to see right now and yet I want to be with right now. Ignoring the call, I stand up and allow the heavy rain fall on me. 

Within seconds, I am wet because of the rain. I touch my face. It is wet too but I know that it is definitely not just the rain. 

I wake up when I feel cold wind blows. I don't remember falling asleep. I check my phone for the time but was surprised to see so many missed calls and text messages. Some were from Kibum and Taemin but mostly, it was from Jonghyun. I get up to leave and hopefully leaving all of these feelings behind as well. As I enter the living room, I see Taemin sleeping on the sofa. Afraid of waking him up, with heavy steps, I go to my room. Without turning on the lights, I lay on my bed hoping that sleep would take over me but sleep wouldn't came. I decided there and then that the best way to handle the situation is to ask him head on. I will just have to try and talk to him and be understanding, patient and not demanding boyfriend. Then everything will be alright. Right?