Through Muddy Water

Chapter 10: Joyaheo

It was only five o’clock but she was already fully dressed, hair done, and bag packed. It was habit now, to be up so early even if she didn’t have to be at the hospital for rounds. 

With all that was going on, for the past week it had been impossible for JanDi to go back to sleep after waking and this today was no exception. It looked like she’s be spending another morning in Shinwah library alone with her textbooks and the rising sun.

Stepping out of her front door she stopped short at the sight of the black car parked outside her apartment. It was strikingly familiar even in the weak light of the morning and her heart froze with worry as she peered across the street. He hadn’t called to say he was coming.

“JunPyo?” she called tentatively.

“Ne,” came a voice from behind her. It startled her and as soon as she recognized it she turned around to smack her fiancée’s arm.

“Ya! Who gave you permission to sneak around out here?”

He laughed at her outburst, gathering her into his arms so she couldn’t move. “I’m head of Shinwah, I can sneak around anywhere I want, especially my fiancée’s place.” She rolled her eyes as he buried his face in her hair, muffling his voice “Good morning Do you have time before class?”

“Bwoh?” She asked trying desperately to smooth her hair from beneath his arms.

He released her shoulders, taking her hand instead and steering them both towards the waiting car. “I thought we could have breakfast. I need to talk to you about something.” He paused to open the car door, ushering her inside.

She frowned suspiciously. “What’s going on?”

“Last night JiHoo and I-“ He reached out for her hand again and she held her breath but instead of a serious face, she saw JunPyo’s quirky smile. “I just wanted to talk to you.”

She felt warm inside, seeing his face light up like that for the first time in a week. Sliding into the seat she tugged him along with her. Under the orange glow of the sunrise she kissed him, savoring the feelings that she had missed for too long. When the kiss was over and sat back in the leather seats, she slipped her fingers back between his. “I’d like to hear about it, let’s go eat.”

***

He felt like a doctor as he stood before the sink, soap covering his palms as he lathered bubbles between his fingers and down his forearms. Watching the foam swirl down the drain, WooBin gently patted his hands dry before crossing the kitchen to where YiJung sat patiently waiting.

“Ok,” he sat down, hands in the air like a surgeon, surveying the supplies laid before him. YiJung reached over, picking up and peeling open the first sterile package enough for WooBin to tug a pair of gloves from within it. The latex felt foreign in comparison to the leather he was accustomed to slipping into.

“Are you cold?” He asked YiJung. It was strange to see his friend dressed down to just the bottom half of a suit and even stranger when you added in the plastic tubing protruding from his chest.

“Anyo, I’m alright.”

“Ne.” WooBin reached over hesitating before examining the potter’s chest.  The dark stitches below the catheter stood out on YiJung’s smooth skin. He was relieved that the neither the incision nor port showed any sign of infection. So far, so good.

“You have a date with Gaeul tonight?” He asked, moving on to open the heparin kit. Once a day they were going to have to do this in order to keep YiJung’s central line clear and accessible for treatment. He’d spent most of the morning looking over all the instructions he had neatly organized into a binder, but he was still nervous to be attempting the procedure without a nurse guiding him.

YiJung looked slightly embarrassed, a newfound reaction which WooBin found amusing. “Oh, that. She’s just coming over here and we’re going to watch a movie.”

“That’s still a date.” Uncapping the first flush, pulled back on the syringe gently to unlock it and then forward until a drop of liquid dribbled from the top to ensure any air was dispelled. He concentrated hard on all the little details the nurses had shown him the previous day. It was a complicated dance of handling the material and extremely important to keep everything sterile and contaminant free. His sentences were short because most of his focus was on the task at hand but YiJung didn’t seem to mind.

“Ne. She didn’t seem to want to go out tonight; I think she’s worried that I won’t be up for it.”

“Does that bother you?” Counting under his breath, he cleaned the first line for a full ten seconds before releasing the clamp and connecting the syringe to the line.

“Anyo, she’s just so thoughtful it makes me feel bad.”

WooBin nodded, finally taking a moment to look up. “Ok buddy, first one. Ready?”

“Ne.”

The plunger slid smoothly forward as the heparin made its way through the tubing and into YiJung’s chest. From the corner of his eye he saw the potter’s face contort into a grimace.

“Gwaenchana?”

YiJung shook his head in disgust. “That stuff tastes awful.”

“Chincha? You taste it?”

“Ne. It’s a side effect of the drug- the nurse told me yesterday. It’s just a really strange experience I’ll have to get used to.” He squirmed a little in his seat, clearly expression distain for the heparin.

“Mian,” he closed the clamp on the first line and began to prep the second in the same way. “I’ll make sure you have something to drink next time, araso?” He wished he could fetch some juice for him before he did the next line but there was no way to do so without compromising the sterile field.

“Just keep going and get it over with.” YiJung replied still looking uncomfortable.

 It took all of WooBin’s power not to rush the last syringe and when he was done he clamped off the second line with a smile. “All set.”

“Kumawo.” YiJung slipped an undershirt over his head, carefully tucking the catheter inside as WooBin stripped off the gloves, tossing them in the special trash can along with the rest of the medical waste.

“Anyo, you don’t have to thank me.” He headed back to the sink to wash his hands, the obnoxious white powder residue of the gloves easily washing away. After drying his hands, he opened the fridge and extracted two bottles of water. Taking a seat he passed one across the table to YiJung who opened it immediately and drank greedily. WooBin also drank, slowly in comparison while studying his friend’s now relaxed face. “Happy to be home?”

“Ne, It’s much more comfortable here than the hospital. Wish I could shower though.”

“Right, you can’t get it wet for a few days.” He was still trying to keep all of the restrictions and instructions straight in his head. It was amazing how quickly YiJung had picked up on things though.

“No showers, baths, or swimming for78 hours and I only got it yesterday,” he whined, itching the back of his scalp. WooBin laughed quietly. YiJung was one of the cleanest in the group, he had always been concerned with his appearance especially during his Shinwah Casanova days.

“You look fine.” It wasn’t a lie, he genuinely looked good today. If they hadn’t just spent the last half hour maintaining a central line, he wouldn’t have pegged him for being sick.

They both enjoyed the sunshine and silence of the airy kitchen before YiJung stretched lazily, finishing his water and drumming his fingers on the table loudly. He looked over at WooBin with a smirk.

“Wae?” WooBin narrowed his eyes at him.

“Where shall we go get lunch,jagiya?” He leaned his elbows on the table, blinking at him, lips tight as if he was trying not to burst out laughing any second. It was a little too cute for a grown man but amusing all the same.

“Ya!” WooBin swatted at him with his empty bottle. “It’s not that bad.”

YiJung laughed heartily, shaking his head. “It’s pretty bad. Actually I think GaEul might get jealous if we keep this up.” He unsuccessfully attempted to fake a serious face while wagging his finger.

“You’re something else.” WooBin chided, taking away his and YiJung’s empty water bottles and throwing them both in the trash. He paused to look out the back window at clouds floating by. I haven’t really left your side for the past few days, am I overstepping my bounds here?

“WooBin-ah.” YiJung was calling from the table.

“Oh?”

“You better not be thinking too hard about what I just said, araso?” He was looking at him with his usual warm smile mixed with a speckling of concern. Years of childhood friendship had created a bond that persisted even after the years away from each other and both men could still read each other like their favorite dog-eared novels. WooBin gave a smile in return. You always did know me best YiJung-ah.

“Araso.”

“Ya,” YiJung called for his attention again. “Listen, if you’re ever bothering me I’ll say something.”

There was a long pause. It had been a long four years, when he was isolated from the F4, spending all his time with his father’s boisterous friends. Loneliness had been his friend and he was still finding it difficult to be suddenly thrown back into such a tightly bound social circle. “Kumawo,” he acknowledged shyly.

“Aish. Let’s not thank each other anymore. Besides,” YiJung checked his watch quickly, “everyone’s expecting us in a few minutes. Shall we get going?”

“Araso.” He searched his pockets for the keys, holding them up with a smile. “Ga Ja!”

***

The sun was shining warmly on the pavement, casting late summer shadows from the buildings and as he strode down the sidewalk it seemed as if even Mother Nature was in favor of his good mood.

JunPyo grinned, eyes shining brightly behind his dark sunglasses. He had finally been able to get some of his feelings off of his chest at breakfast. Jandi had been patient, listening intently and allowing him to be honest. I will work hard so that eventually we can talk comfortably, he had promised. She had promised him she would be patient and also work hard in return and the rest of the morning thereafter had only gotten better.

Up ahead he caught sight of a a familiar blur of light hair. “Ya, JiHoo!”

“Oh JunPyo,” the young doctor greeted, his smile reminiscent of one he would have given during their high school days. “You came.”

“Of course, YiJung invited so here I am.”

“Ne. It is something isn’t it.” They looked across the street together, both unable to stop from smiling. It appeared as if good moods were contagious and both men were in high spirits.

“ JiHoo-ah.

“Ne?” He looked at him quizzically.

He looked over, his dark bangs falling thickly across his forehead. “Kumawo. This morning­­... I was able to talk to JanDi.” He couldn’t help but to smile again at mention of her name.

JiHoo nodded, hands in pockets. “Good, now keep it that way araso?”

“Araso, he laughed out loud. “Araso.”

“Oh? Look at these two early birds,” came a cheerful voice from behind. YiJung had arrived, another grinning face to add to the group.

“Yo, what’s up?” greeted WooBin as he strode alongside the potter in his usual spot. JunPyo didn’t remember the last time he had seen one without the other.

 “Early? I think it’s more like you two coming late.” He replied stubbornly.

“The person who makes the plans can never be late.” YiJung shot right back with a grin.

“Aish, let’s eat already.” JiHoo teased, playfully pushing past them both.

“Ya,” YiJung chuckled, “Aren’t I supposed to go first?”

One by one they filed through the doorway, JiHoo leading, YiJung chasing, and WooBin falling back to hold the door. Third in line, JunPyo obediently followed until the prince caught him by the elbow before he could enter. “It’s good have you two back.” WooBin said, just quiet enough to stay out of earshot of YiJung.

JunPyo simply smiled for the thousandth time that day, nodding and taking the door. He motioned for WooBin to step ahead, taking the end of the line for once. “It’s good to have everyone back together again.”

***

She had yet to experience a bad date with the legendary Casanova but so far this one was her favorite, probably because of its striking simplicity. GaEul and YiJung had eaten dinner side by side at the large dark table of his dining room where he had listened to her talk about her students with great interest and she had listened to him speak about Sweden with equal attentiveness.

Shehad never been one for fanciness; in fact she was surprised it was so comfortable inside the So residence. From where she sat, relaxed on the roomy couch, she could see that the style was rich, but cozy and rather simplistic.

 “Comfortable?” YiJung asked, carefully shaking out the softest blanket GaEul had ever touched to cover their laps.

“Ne.” She replied shyly.

“Good.”  

The after-effects of the rich food and wine were making her sleepy and when he took a seat beside her she let her head rest against his shoulder, innocently looking up at his perfect jawline. Being so close, she was learning every detail of his handsome features. He caught her closing her eyes to take in the moment and kissed her forehead before flashing one of his million dollar grins. “Don’t get too comfortable araso? We haven’t even started the movie yet.”

“I won’t,” she promised, knowing it was probably one she wouldn’t be keeping.  Tucking her legs to the side, she snuggled closer to him. The space on the side of this neck was warm and soft where her cheek touched his skin. As the lights dimmed, she felt him slip an arm around her shoulders. Not suave or fake, but protective and real. YiJung-ah, is this as natural for us as it feels?

With a click of the remote, the movie began but GaEul had a hard time paying attention. She was too busy taking in the events of the past week. Tonight was really the first time they’d been truly alone since the diagnosis. Sure WooBin and the other guys had given them their space, but it wasn’t the same as this.

Leukemia… cancer… chemotherapy… hospital… These were not words that were supposed to be part of her vocabulary. In a perfect world nobody would need to know those words. Today is Saturday, next treatment is Monday. Monday- I should take the day off on Monday. But I already took yesterday off…

The volume jumped as the movie switched scenes and he realized how off track her thoughts were getting. She mentally kicked herself for letting her worrisome mind infiltrate such a perfect night. Turning her attention back to the screen, she realized that YiJung had grown rather silent.  And you warned me not to get too comfortable.

“YiJung-ah,” she whispered, reaching up and tugging gently on the front of his shirt.

“Ne” he murmured, taking her hand away from his collar and putting it on his lap where he interlocked his fingers with hers.

“Are you tired?”

“A little.” With her head so close to his she could feel the vibrations from his voice. Wrapping her free arm more tightly around his, she tried not to move her head, which was now his pillow.

“Should I let you sleep?” she whispered, unable to see his face above her.

“Anyo,” he replied, mumbling into her hair. “I want more time with you.”

“You can still have time with me,” she assured, disentangling her legs from beneath her and awkwardly stretching with her head and torso still locked in his embrace. “Here.” She slowly tried to reposition her body on the couch. Instead of succeeding however, she managed to force YiJung to awkwardly flop sideways. Picking up his head, he looked at her with a half confused and half annoyed face. “Where are you going?” he whined with a sleepy voice.

“Nowhere,” she responded, resisting the urge to giggle at his flyaway hair and furrowed brow. Patting her lap with one hand she reached out to coax him with the other. ”Come here.”

He obliged, laying his head in her lap so she could feel his breath through her jeans. Pulling the blanket over his body she tucked it around his shoulders.

“Stay.” He wrapped his arms around her leg.

“Bwoh?”

“If I sleep, will you stay?”

“Ne. I’ll stay. I’m not going anywhere.” I don’t want to be alone either- we can stay together.

Letting go of her leg, he rolled to his back, eyes still closed but facing upwards.

“GaEul… mianhe.”

“Anyo, don’t apologize YiJung-ah.” She his hair tenderly, tilting her own head back and closing her eyes. “It’s not your fault, definitely not your fault.”

“GaEul,..” She looked up at the shadowy ceiling, eyelids growing heavier with each tick of the clock. “GaEul,” he called again.

“Ya,still not sleeping?” she teased, looking down and putting a finger to his lips to silence him.

Beneath her touch she saw him smile contentedly. “Joaheyo.”

Her heart skipped a beat as he found her hand once more, holding it to his chest like a child would grasp a security blanket. Gradually her breath slowed to match his, rhythmic and soft and they slept in sync, holding each other close because long as they had a grip on one another that was all that mattered.

***

Kekeke.... some SoEul moments to make my readers happy :P