A/N:  For some more thorough relationship sleuthing, check out my Yunjae/DB5K blog if you haven't already! Part 2 will be up later today! Enjoy!

YOU'RE MY MELODY

Jaejoong rarely felt nervous going onstage anymore, but there was still something slightly terrifying about the idea of stepping out to see a crowd bigger than he'd ever seen in person before, all there to see DBSK sing. They were sequestered backstage for now, but their staff told them about everything they couldn't see for themselves-- the long lines that had spilled into the arena, the lightsticks and banners and lightboards, the booths outside selling their merchandise, and even the occasional foreigners who'd come all the way to Korea to attend their first solo concert.

Trying to release some of this nervous energy, Jaejoong hunted down Changmin at the buffet table and began chattering away meaninglessly to him until Changmin bluntly advised him to calm down and shut up. Junsu was too busy practicing for his audience talks to pay him any mind, so Jaejoong finally settled for joining Yunho and Yoochun on the couches where they were doing vocal warm ups together. While Jaejoong waited for them to finish, he grabbed Yunho's white jacket and began to straighten it absently.

“Is now really the time to be acting like a doting wife?” Yoochun asked.

“Don't be jealous,” Yunho said, taking Jaejoong's hand. “Just because you don't have anyone to take care of you...”

“When I do, remind me to do a better job of keeping it to myself than you two.” But he was grinning when he said it, so Yunho and Jaejoong only rolled their eyes. “They're going to love you out there.”

“Junsu ah still says we have to be more careful,” Jaejoong said. “That we should leave all the fanservice stuff to you and him.”

“And when has it ever been a good idea to listen to Junsu? After what happened with Dami, you two have more to reassure the fans of than anyone. You know your limits and not to push them. I trust you.” He glanced at Jaejoong guilty. “Well, I trust Yunho hyung, at least. His filter is more functional. I'm frankly rarely sure what's going to come out of your mouth half the time.”

The event director cleared his throat, and they all fell silent. “We're approaching the scheduled start time. It's time to head to the central backstage area. Follow me.”

Jaejoong took a breath and followed the director to the underbelly of the stage. The rest of their wardrobe hung on racks for their quick changes, and coordinators were waiting there to hook up their microphones and double check that their stage clothes were all in order. From his position, Jaejoong could hear the rumble of the audience from above, and some of his anxiety dispelled. Having people who counted on him made him eager to deliver, and a part of him was hungry for the attention they gave him. He'd outgrown wanting to be invisible, and he took in all the love he was given by his fans as a repayment for all he'd suffered before on his own.

“Everyone wired up?” the director asked, checking them one by one to make sure their microphones were set up properly. “We'll be starting the intro video. Are you ready?”

The five of them nodded, and the director his walkie talkie to give the message to the staff handling lighting and effects. From there they were led forward to their individual lifts which would take them up to the clear boxes that were lowering down for them from the catwalks.

Jaejoong could hear the video start and the audience cheering for it, but the pounding of his heart suddenly seemed so much louder than everything else. He glanced across Changmin to where Yunho was standing, and they met each other's eyes. They'd been given specific accessories to wear by their stylists, but Jaejoong had kept his couple ring in his pocket, and slipped it on now. Yunho grinned and pulled out the silver cross he was wearing around his neck. He'd hooked his ring through the necklace so it rested against his chest. A feeling of pure, uncomplicated happiness washed over Jaejoong, and his heart steadily calmed, even as their lifts began to rise and take them onstage. Everything would be fine. It was their first concert of many, he told himself, and with this moment, they'd only be able to go further and further.

The lights were dark when he landed in his cube, and though the audience couldn't see him, he could see them by the glow of their lightsticks and their brightly colored banners. They were cheering loudly already, but when the lights lit up in front of their cubes, illuminating their bodies, the screams became frenzied. With the stage lights brightened and the cube confining him lifted up again, Jaejoong was finally able to see how many people had come. An ocean of red glimmered in front of him, sweeping as far as his eyes could see.

In the moment before the music started, Jaejoong stared out into them, a rush of energy and excitement filling his body. So many things had led up to this, both bad and good, but it all felt worth it to be able to see this for the first time. There were no words enough to explain what he felt when he looked at them and heard their cheers, but the words of the music they had created together would have to do.

The music started, and the audience swelled forward to meet them, greeting their voices with a love that was bigger than the music itself, bigger than anything.

0o0

“How are you doing out there?” Junsu yelled out, waving his arms like an overeager child. The audience screamed back, and the other members smiled at one another. Even if he launched into his stupid jokes, everyone was in the mood to love it tonight with how pumped they were.

“WE ARE DBSK!” they called out, doing their traditional chant and bow. One by one, they introduced themselves, pausing to let their fans cheer out for their favorites.

“Thank you for taking the time to come out and see us,” Yunho said, bowing again. “If your parents wanted you to stay home and do your homework, tell them how sorry we are to have distracted you. It wasn't so long since we were students, too, trying to convince our parents to let us go out to shows. I even got a text message from my aunt this morning telling me that she was happy about my show, but I still shouldn't make anyone stay out too late.”

“Guess we'll have to end the concert early, then,” Changmin said. Everyone screamed out in protest.

“You'd rather go home and sleep than to sing to our beautiful fans?” Yoochun said in a mock offended voice. “This kid! He hasn't changed at all! Whenever we had sleepovers when we were younger, he'd be asleep first, but then wake up and start yelling at us for making too much noise.”

“And then proceed to go to the kitchen and eat ramen while pouting,” Junsu added.

“At least I didn't cry when Yoochun spilled fruit juice all over my favorite teddy bear,” Changmin shot back. “Besides, ramen is good for the soul. It made me feel better about all my hyungs being jerks.”

“Oh, wow,” Jaejoong said, laughing. “I feel like I'm learning a new side to all of you today. I'm kind of glad there's no one here who can leak all my embarrassing secrets... just as long as the staff doesn't go around passing out microphones to my sisters.”

“As you guys know, we didn't get to meet Jaejoong hyung until a few years ago,” Junsu said. “Our Yunho hyung rescued him, isn't that nice?” The audience screamed.

“I wonder about that now,” Changmin said. “Hyung said that Jaejoong hyung was suffering from heat exhaustion and he ran to help. But as soon as hyung saw his face, he out. Doesn't that make it sound like it was the sight of Yunho hyung that made him sick?”

“Oi!” Yunho yelled. “Really, this kid!”

“Now that I think of it, there is something that makes me wonder,” Jaejoong said, pursing his lips. “I was on the road when I out, but when I woke up I was in Yunho ah's house. I never asked how it was you were able to carry me there?”

“Don't make light of my arm strength. Someone like you isn't terribly heavy.”

“But more importantly-- did you carry me on your back? Or was it princess style?”

The audience screamed with even more intensity, and Yoochun and Changmin started laughing. “Now that you mention it, it's hard to remember,” Yunho said evasively. “How did I do it again? I think was more worried about getting you water than how I carried you.”

“Ehhh, sounds like a cop out,” Yoochun yelled.

Yunho waited until all the laughter in the room had died before speaking again. “No matter how I carried Jaejoongie at that time, I think it was easier then sometimes than it is now. In recent times, both Jaejoong and Yoochun ah went through something difficult, and it really felt like there was nothing I could do. I wanted to carry them, too, but there are things where it's hard to protect everyone perfectly.” He looked out into the audience. “But you'll carry us, too, right? We never have to worry about anything, because you'll pick us right back up, won't you?”

“Yes, Yunho oppa!” they called out to him.

“Then we promise not to be too much of a burden on you. We want to pick you up when you're unhappy, too, so let's all help each other to be strong, all right. Oh, and Jaejoong ah?”

“Yes?”

“I remember now. It was definitely princess-style.”

“Ehhh?” Jaejoong started laughing, and he could hear someone in the audience scream out “Yunjae!” More people followed her lead, and he could clearly hear their names being called out together. The sound of it made his skin flush. He knew they had an interest in them, but he hadn't heard them actually reveal as much out loud before. He liked it a little. At this stage, most of them were probably into it because it meant no other women would be snatching the two of them up, but he secretly hoped some of them would realize that it went deeper than that. That is was for their own happiness rather than the fans', a purely selfish thing.

He looked over his shoulder again at Yunho. The stage lights were lit dimly over his body, reflecting warmly off the white fabric of his jacket. Heaven shines on you, shines on you, Jaejoong thought to himself, smiling. It had been too long since he'd sung the words of that song, and he wanted to now. The one kiss, given so long ago, was as strong in his heart as it ever was. No matter how many other times he tried to put it into other words, those were still his best.

Yunho looked back at him. “Yes, Jaejoongie?” he asked in the aegyo voice his fans loved so much.

“Hmm?”

“You're looking at me like you want something.”

Jaejoong really did blush this time, and the fans chanting their names only seemed to get louder. “Ehhh?” he said again, looking anywhere else but Yunho. “I was just imagining how silly you must have looked carrying me like that. Really, shouldn't there be a limit to how gallant you try to be?”

“Is that really how hyung feels?” Yoochun asked, lifting an eyebrow.

“Someone who is never gallant doesn't have the right to tease,” Junsu shot back. “I still can't figure out why C&M signed a fish store worker as an idol.”

“You do realize you're insulting yourself when you say that, Junsu ah?”

Jaejoong heard Yoochun and Junsu start ribbing each other even more, most likely to take some of the attention off of Yunho and himself, but his attention was distracted by a lightboard in the distance, a flash of white in the sea of red. He saw the first character for Yunho's name-- a Yunho fan, then?-- but he immediately paused. The character after was for him. Yunjae. The fan's lightboard was entirely for them. Before he could stop himself, he waved his hand to that single fan as the others kept on talking. There were so many people that there was probably no way that they'd realize it was for them, but he hoped that he conveyed just a little piece of his happiness all the same.

0o0

By time the concert was over, Jaejoong's voice was raspy and he was so sweaty that he was disgusted with himself, but he didn't feel the slightest bit tired. Concerts felt like they were gifts for the fans, but in truth, he felt the most rewarded from it. As much as he liked everything they did behind the scenes, actually performing was the true high point for him. He was proud of all their work coming to fruition, and how well they shined when they were together.

The five of them toweled off backstage while their staff rushed around to get them water bottles and their change of clothes. They were congratulated for their hard work, and although they brushed it off and said there were mistakes and they could definitely do better next time, they were still pleased. It had been a success for them regardless of if it had been perfect or not, and knowing that couldn't help but feel good.

A few minutes later, Yongsoo arrived in their dressing room, armed with some take out so they could replenish themselves after the work out they'd just gone through. Starkiss and the other vocal groups came in with him, carrying their own red lightsticks; they'd had special seating for the show, along with all of the DBSK family members who'd been able to come.

“Great job out there,” Gaeun said enthusiastically. “Way to make it look like your 100^th concert instead of your first. You five have a real knack for this.”

“I can't believe we'll get to be up onstage soon, too,” Chaozhi said breathlessly. “Won't it be difficult to be as good as you?”

“If four nobodies from the country and one nut job hyung can do it, I'm sure you can,” Yoochun said, ruffling Chaozhi's hair. “We're glad you had fun.”

“Hyunsoo nim says he's going to debut us right when you guys get back from Japan,” Haejin said. “Before you make your own comeback. Starkiss will be promoting while you're gone, right noona?”

“That's the plan,” Brie said. “Although I'm getting worried if we're a good enough attraction to compete with you youngsters these days. Gaeun unni just turned twenty-five last week.”

“I'm still young!” Gaeun protested, pouting.

“Do you guys think you're ready for the big debut?” Yunho asked, turning to Jongwoo, the team leader.

He nodded. “We think we can do it. Hyunsoo nim says that now that you guys have a stable place in the industry, it's time for us to find our place, too.” He glanced askance at Chansik and Shinwon, who'd both been fairly quiet up until then. “Just a few teamwork kinks to work out, still.”

Jaejoong glanced at the two of them. Clearly, Chansik hadn't confessed to Shinwon after they'd gone out drinking, and they were still fighting. They were standing with Chaozhi and Haejin positioned in between them, and were making a point of not looking at each other, even after Jongwoo's remark. Shinwon looked uncharacteristically dispirited, and Chansik just looked plain grumpy.

It's too bad we'll be leaving soon, Jaejoong thought. Someone needs to get that boy to get over himself before he messes things up for good.

“Now that I have all the groups together, I have some news,” Yongsoo said. “Sung Dami's legal team got in touch with us this morning, and they've worked out a plea deal. She'll accept guilty on all charges and accept all resulting fines and punishments, provided that the individual members of Starkiss and DBSK refrain from filing civil suits against her. They've argued that she's already been put through the wringer by the press without another round of suits worsening her position. We haven't agreed yet, and we wanted to discuss with you to see if these terms would work.”

“Is now the time?” Soorin said, nodding to the members of DBSK, who were still sweaty and in their stage clothes.

“I'm not asking for an answer now, but bringing it up as something to consider,” Yongsoo said. “Besides, it's something DBSK should have a say in before they leave. Frankly speaking, it's quite evident that Dami is guilty of most charges brought against her, particularly since you guys managed to get that recording of her confessing. There's really no need to accept a bargain when she'll be charged with her crimes, anyways. But taking it from the company's perspective, it would be best not to draw this out for longer than necessary. It's not bad press for us, necessarily, but it's not the best thing for people to have on their minds during your activities. Particularly if your fans get in their heads to physically harass Dami or anyone associated with her for the sake of Starkiss or DBSK.”

Saehee glanced at Jaejoong and Yoochun. “What do you say? Personally, I'd also like to to keep this from popping up all the time since Minjun has a new drama starting soon, but you two were the ones actually physically harmed in this whole thing.”

“It's a more personal matter for hyung,” Yoochun said. “I'll be fine whatever he decides.”

Jaejoong turned to Yongsoo. “We will have restraining orders put in place, right? She won't be able to come near us at any point, will she?”

“Honestly, restraining orders are like being protected from harm by a piece of paper. You'll be more protected by the fact that there's no chance Sung Dami will be able to stay in Seoul safely given her actions after any sentence she receives is up. Your fans will make retaliation from her difficult. I'd advise moving ahead with the bargain unless you seriously insist on filing a civil suit against her.”

Jaejoong was tempted, if only to rub more salt in her wounds, but otherwise it would be meaningless to keep bombarding her with fines. She'd already lost her career, reputation, and nearly her entire fanbase, and compared to that, money just seemed like a worthless thing to take from her. “Take the deal, then,” he said. “But make sure she gets every fine and penalty that comes along with her guilty plea, all right? She's not getting off easy.”

“You're too kind,” Yunho said quietly after Yongsoo had left to allow them to change out of their stage outfits. “Kinder than I would be to someone like her.”

Jaejoong shook his head. “I don't think of it as kindness. I just have no need for her money or any more symbolic victories over her.” He looked up at Yunho, smiling. “I don't think anything will be worth more to me than seeing her face when she knew it was me you loved and not her.”

“You're quite devious when you want to be, Boojae,” Yunho said fondly. “Remind me not to get on your bad side.”

“You'll just have to make sure not to break up with me, then.”

“I think I can just about handle that.” He patted Jaejoong's hair. “By the way, I wasn't making that up. I did carry you princess-style. When you passed out.”

Jaejoong felt his ears turning red. “Too bad I don't actually remember.”

“That's fine.” He leaned in, lightly blowing into Jaejoong's ear. “There are other ways I prefer to hold you, after all.”

0o0

It was a mob scene at the airport when they finally left for Japan. Half of their fans were in tears at the thought of them leaving for so long, and even though Jaejoong also felt badly for leaving, he still wished they'd keep their emotions a little bit more contained. A few of the more frenzied ones kept trying to launch themselves past security, and no matter how much the guards tried to hold them back, hands still s out to grab them from every which way. Yunho stayed close to Jaejoong, keeping his hand on his waist and leading him away from the worst of it. As much as Jaejoong felt like he could navigate his way through them just fine, he liked that kind of protectiveness from Yunho. Only I get to touch you, it felt like he was saying, which filled him with a sense of smug satisfaction. Take that, all the Sung Damis of the world. This person is mine.

They finally made it to security where their fans couldn't follow them, which allowed them a moment to relax. Yoochun and Junsu pulled out their Japanese lesson books as soon as they could and began to work on their practical conversation. Changmin had One Piece open on his phone, and was practicing in his preferred method.

“I'm seriously wondering what will happen if we all blank out during our first interview,” Yunho muttered, finally letting his hand drop from Jaejoong's waist. “They have absolutely no reason to like us. They already have their own popular groups over there, so what if they decide we're no good? And it's not like they'll give us a shot because we're from the same label as Starkiss. Starkiss hasn't crossed over there, so-”

“Our Rising Sun album sold copies in Japan,” Jaejoong said, cutting him short. “And they absolutely have five good reasons to like us, number one being that I'm a part of DBSK.”

“Tohoshinki,” Yunho corrected him. “But you're right. This isn't very leaderly of me, is it? I'm just anxious. All of us debuted with the knowledge of how the Korean market works, but Japan will be different. We'll have to be different.”

“And we will be.” Jaejoong squeezed his hand. “Wouldn't it be a disappointment to our fans if we leave them and don't manage to do well? So we're going to take Japan by storm!”

“Heh. You've sold me. I feel kind of silly about worrying now.”

“Don't. You were the one who stayed strong for me when I wasn't doing well on my own. I can do the same for you.” He grinned. “I told you I was going to change.”

“Is it really changing?” Yunho tapped his cheek. “I think it's becoming more of who you really are.”

Jaejoong's smile widened. That's what he wanted to think, too. That he wasn't pushing his old self away or erasing his history, but simply becoming someone he always had it in him to become. He hadn't regressed back or betrayed Yunho's faith in him, no matter how close he'd come. In Japan, they'd be starting yet another chapter, and he wanted to fill it with all the things he hadn't been able to do before and openly live the life he'd worked so hard to have with no regrets or moments of weakness.

You’re my melody
I’ll perform for you (on and on)
You are my song
The soundtrack in my life
I love you
You lit up the stage of my life
(I’ll sing it again) You’re my song

It’s your love your love 
You told me the meaning of love (and on & on & on)
You’re my rhythm
A gift in my life
Giving me beautiful dreams
Always by my side
I’ll sing it again
You’re my song