"Whoa whoa whoa, Joori, no need to get too dramatic here ok? It's just chicken; it's not like me ordering Mexicana chicken is going to prevent Onew from coming back....he'll still come back for YOUR fried chicken. After all, nothing beats homestyle fried chicken, right? Maybe?" Jonghyun panicked, backing into the corner as Joori advanced with the butcher's knife. Joori ignored him, holding the knife the way Jacques Pepin holds it when he prepares himself to debone a chicken in 29 seconds. Jonghyun kept trying to back up, but he tripped over an empty tofu container, which made him fall into an extremely disadvantageous position, seeing that now Joori was standing over top of him with the knife pointed straight at his brain.

"HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIYAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH------------------" An arm caught the knife before it could reach Jonghyun.

"Joori ah, I gave you that knife when I still sold chicken. It's a very good knife meant for deboning chicken, not stabbing people to death. You can do that with the cheap knifes called...called...what were they called again? Oh right! Machetes!" Minho ajumma had a surprising amount of strength, which probably came with years of pulling vegetables out of the ground.

"Grandma!" Taemin jumped up and gave the elderly lady a hug. Minho smiled fondly and ruffled his hair with her free hand, the other still firmly gripping Joori's arm.

"Taeminnie ah, you're so cute, I sound like a total pedo right now since I'm supposed to be your grandma, but oh well...." Minho ajumma trailed off, not really making sense to anyone. Taemin just kept smiling at her, while Joori tried to free her arm and stab Jonghyun. Jonghyun was smart enough to take this chance and run out of Joori's apartment screaming at an 8 year old girl's pitch. He set off an avalanche in the Himalayas, killing the annoying Yeti that had been stealing kyu (a sour or salty porridge of many grains-corn, rice, and millet) from the Sherpas. The Sherpas cheered, and even though they were in Nepal, Jonghyun, in Korea, heard them. He paused in the middle of the staircase, bowed, and continued screaming while running out towards Mexicana Chicken. He halted to a stop and decided that it would be a better idea to run towards his tofu shop, where he was certain Joori would never be able to find him (he has amazing logic, doesn't he? XD).  He then simultaneously slipped on a puddle, ran into a sign, then crashed into the glass door of his shop.  in pain, he pulled out his key and jabbed it roughly into the keyhole, causing 3 random strangers to faint in the process.

"AJUMMA! Why did you stop me?" Joori glared at the elderly lady and then at Taemin, who had gone back to eating.

"Joori ah, pretty boys like that aren't meant for killing. They're meant for stalking, staring, or desiring. What was his name?"

"Jonghyun." Joori  her lips unconsciously.

"Hm...Jonghyun...ah...hm...you could leave him alone and go back to Onew.."

Joori gawked at Minho ajumma. What was she saying? Onew had caused her all that pain and she wanted her to go back to him?

"Well I'm sorry, but I'm a woman too, and I must say, I really want Jonghyun too. He just looks so yummy..." Taemin paused with his spoon halfway in his mouth and looked at his grandma.

"Grandma...you're..so....pedo.....oooh ooh ooh, noona, can you get me a pedo bear?" Taemin was instantly distracted by the thought of a stuffy. Joori was left speechless. Here was a ic grandmother and a grandson who was too preoccupied by pedo bears to care that his GRANDMA was attracted a tofu man. The sudden click of the door unlocking was thus gone unnoticed, since Minho ajumma was thinking about Jonghyun, Taemin about pedo bear, and Joori about why the people around her were all so weird.

"Ah! Annyosaeyo Minho ajumma! What are you doing here?" Onew laced his fingers with Key's. All 3 heads turned to look at him, mouths dropping open at the sight of chicken man Key.

"Hyung...why are you holding his hand like that? And who is he?"

Onew smiled and pecked Key on the cheek, making Key blush. "He's my boyfriend. And his name is Key. "

Joori turned fire engine red, steam puffing out of her ears. Taemin rushed to put his bowl next to her ear to warm up his rice.

"Onew...you...have...a.....boy...friend? Key's your boyfriend now?"

Onew smirked at her shocked face. "Yeah. "

"Well...well...I do....too...."

"Oh really now? Where is he?"

"Jonghyun hyung! What are you doing back here?"

"SHHHHHHH. I came to get my tofu knife."

With his not-so-excellent ninja skills, Jonghyun tried to sneak into the kitchen, though Taemin had obviously already exposed his location. Joori stood glaring at Onew for a moment, then suddenly grabbed Jonghyun with Hulk strength and pressed her lips against his. Jonghyun froze in surprise.

"Kim Jonghyun, meet Onew. Onew, Jonghyun."

"Onew?"

"Yeah." Joori suddenly emanated a demonic aura topped off with a diabolical cackle. "Yeah, yeah he's Onew. My ex-boyfriend."

Sorry for the late update! I got a bit busy. Hopefully you guys like my random spontaneity XD

ashley888, I think you know where I got Jonghyun's tripping and crashing into signs from...XD