In about two weeks, Hyuk and the rest of the school have an autumn break. (I actually have no idea if I mentioned that in one chapter. So sorry if somewhere else stands that it's on a different day, but now it's in two weeks. Okay? :)) Hyuk first looked forward on that, but after Hya came back and Hongbin felt in love with her... He just wanted to die. I mean, if Hongbin and Hya get togehter than... yeah... He had to see them love each other? What can't because Hya doesn't love Hongbin. Hyuk really needed Hya to stop before they had their break.

It was three days later, after he developed his plan to search for Hya's documents in her dorm. 

He sat on the coutch of his dorm and Hongbin had a date, AGAIN! And again with that witch.

He sighed and shook his head. How could she act so sweet? Did she go to a school where you can learn how to act or something? Or Hongbin was really blind. You know what they say: love is blind. He shook his head again. Hongbin is blind and Hya is a . Lets agree on that. 

He looked at the clock. It was an half past eight and Hongbin was gone for an half hour now. 

Hyuk really didn't want to imagining him and Hya having fun at... Where ever they were. But he couldn't stop his mind. His head got flooded with images of Hongbin and Hya, sitting in a restaurant, watching a movie at her dorm, being in a cinema, or whatever and having fun.

And then his mind did something really, really foolish. Showing a picture of Hya and Hongbin... kissing.

Hyuk fisted his hands in his hair in frustration. Whenever he saw N and Ravi or Leo and Ken he wondered how it looked so easy with them. They looked all so in love and it looked almost impossible. But luckily they slowed down their 'we-are-so-in-love' attitude. He had wonderful friends. Crazy, but wonderful. 

He decided to do nothing. Just as yesterday and the day therefor and the day therefor. He just didn't do . Only sitting on the coutch imagining the things he didn't want to imagine. Oh, and figuring out when he should rummage Hya's dorm. 

He sighed and sunk into the coutch. He was stressed. It took so much effort, all this took so much effort. 

After he saw Hya in the basement, he didn't see her again. And he loved it. Not having to look at her. Well, he saw her in class and stuff, but ignored her. Even though she looked at him, with her devilish eyes. Wanted him to look at her so he could see her smile of victory. But she didn't win. Well, actually she did. But Hyuk didn't give up. He refused to give up. 

----

A day later, Hyuk sat in Ken and Leo's dorm, along with them self and Ravi and N. Hongbin wasn't there, he was at Hya's again. How terribly it was.

It was evening, not late, but late enough to be dark outside. They sat on the ground on pillows, because... Yeah, they actually didn't know. Because it looked cooler to sit in a circle on the ground? 

"Roam around in Hya's dorm?" Leo asked when Hyuk told them his plan. "You want to roam around in her dorm?"

Hyuk nodded. "It's the only thing I could come up with. I mean, she hides those documents of her in her dorm, so that's the only place we can look for them." 

"And there isn't another way to get information?" Ken asked. He was the one who really didn't like the plan. He didn't want to break in someone's property. All though it was for Hyuk, he just couldn't.

Hyuk shook his head no. "I don't think so." 

"We could hack a computer," N suggested.

Hyuk remembered something N said when they were in the school's archives. 'I'm not a goody-goody as you think.' And now he came up with hacking a computer? What kind of maniac was N?  

"We could..." Ravi agreed hesitantly.  "But I think that breaking into her dorm is less dangerous..." 

"That's true," N agreed and nodded. "Okay. I'm in." 

Hyuk also nodded and looked at Leo. "And you?" 

Leo bit his lip dubitable. "All right." 

Now Hyuk looked at Ravi. 

"If N is going, then I'm too," he said and smiled at N with half-moon eyes.

And then they looked all four at Ken, who looked from one to another.

"Come on," Leo tried and put an arm around his shoulder. "I'll be there and there's nothing going to happen." 

"Leo's right," Ravi said and also put an arm around Ken. 

Ken swallowed. He looked as if he had to make a decision between going to die and letting Leo go. He sighed. "Okay then. But if we get in trouble than it's your fault. All of you," He said with narrowed eyes.

They laughed.

"We won't," N said absolute.

"So, when are we going to do this?" Ravi asked.

"Mh," Hyuk said and thought about when was the best time. "Hya probably has a roommate too... We could do it when Hya has a date with Hongbin again and when her roommate is also gone." 

"And when is that?" Leo asked.

"I have no idea," Hyuk admitted. "But maybe I can deal something with Hongbin?" 

Ken laughed, being himself again. "So you gonna say: 'I need to know when Hya's dorm is empty so I can break in'?" 

Hyuk laughed, because it sounded ridiculous and because he didn't know actually. "I'll see what I'll say..." 

"You better have a plan," N warned.

"A plan, huh," Hyuk said and laid on the ground. "All plans we made failed, remember?" 

"Well, not every plan," Ken corrected him.

Hyuk looked questioning at his friend.

"Thay date plan, you know what I'm talking about?" 

Oh, yes. He knew what he was talking about. His date with Hongbin, right? Yeah, that was a fun night. Hyuk sighed when he falshbacked it. He thought he had a change, which he maybe had. Bud then yeah... things went wrong.

"I'm sorry I started about it, I-" 

Hyuk cut him off before he appologized further. "It's okay," Hyuk reassured him. "Actually I'm glad you remembered me to it." 

They were quiet for a moment. You know, a moment of silence to rethink that moment as if someone died.

"So," Ravi began, "no plan?"

Hyuk shook his head no. "No plan this time."

----

Hyuk sat that evening at the kitchen table of his own dorm. Doing his homework and waiting for Hongbin to come home.

Because they almost had a break, the teachers liked to give a bunch homework and tests. That's just a teachers thing. I bet everybody knows what I mean, right? And also Hyuk had to deal with that. 

He sighed and finished his math tasks and put his books away. Then he picked his chemistry books and tried to understand it. I mean, it's not he's dumb or something, but his head wouldn't cooperate with him. It didn't want to study and learn. Refused to do homework and to understand things. Always traying to Hongbin. That guy, that guy was in his head 24/7 and it was annoying. But how hard he tried, it didn't help to think of something else. 

Hyuk shook his head and tilted it. He stared at the words in his book which tried to learn him something. To explane things. But he didn't want an explanation about chemistry, he wanted an explanation about Hya and Hongbin. About what's going to happen and what he should do. What does his life want with him? Where is this going? But did he get anwers? No. Never.

"Hey, hey, heeey!" Hongbin said happy as he walked in. He put his coat off and walked over to Hyuk. "Homework?" 

"Yes," Hyuk said and tried to do as if he was deep in thoughts, which he actually was. "You should do that too." 

Hongbin pulled a chair out and sat next to him, leaning his head on his fist. "I guess you're right," He said smiling and got his own books.

To Hyuk, Hongbin sat to close next to him. He could at least sit on the other side of the table. Their elbows almost touched and Hyuk feeled uncomfortable. All thought it were only their elbows.

He cleared his throat and looked at his crush. "When are you having a date with her again?" Hyuk asked. He really, really, really hoped that the anwser was: never. But that couldn't.

"Eh... tomorrow I think..." Hongbin said hessistantly. "You mean with Hya right?" 

Hyuk frowned with hearing him saying that name. "Yes," he said wrecked. "Does she have a roommate?" 

"Ehm, yeah?" Hongbin said. "Why? Wanting a date with her?" 

Not funny, Hyuk thought angry, Not ing funny. "No, I'm not interessed in her, I guess. But, eh.." Damn how is he going to ask this? He couldn't just say: 'And is her drom empty tomorrow?' Just something like Ken said. That would be weird.

"Yeah..?" Hongbin asked and looked questionly at him.

"Is she... I she also away tomorrow evening?" Hyuk stuttered. 

Hongbin laughed. "Yes, she has a boyfriend. That's why I asked if you wanted a date with her, because you can't." 

That sounded offensively. 'Because you can't,' Hyuk repeated in his head. That sounded not nice. "Oh," he said and let out a forced laugh. "I'm happy for her?" 

Awkwaaard.

"Yes, but why do you have to know if there is no one in her dorm tomorrow?" Hongbin asked and looked suspisiously. "Are you planning a robbery?" 

"N-no!" Hyuk said shocked. Damn, he got caught. "Of course not. What do I have to do in her dorm?" He laughed nervously.

Hongbin shrugged his shoulders and faced his homework again. "I don't know. That's why I asked." 

Hyuk scratched his neck and got back to work. Well, at least he tried. From the corners of his eyes he kept on staring at Hongbin. He looked so hot when he did his homework. That little frown on his forehead as he tried to figure something. His hand that stopped writing as he didn't understand something that got asked. When he shifted on his chair from time to time. Those moments that he finished one subject and picked another book from his bag that stood on the ground. And when he did that, his shirt crawled up exposing some of his back and the elastic of his boxers. Hyuk had to do his very best to not drool. Hongbin was really something to look at. 

"Finished," Hongbin said after a while and looked at Hyuk, who still was with the same subject as when he came home. "You don't understand something?"

"Eh..." Hyuk searched for words.

"Here let me help," Hongbin said and grabbed Hyuk's pen while he leaned closer to him to get a better look at his work. "Mh, chimestry..."

Hyuk bit the inside of his cheek. This was WAY to close! He needed to go away... Hongbin pressed up against him like that, it wasn't healthy. "Eh," Hyuk began and shove his chair to the side so that Hongbin didn't lean on him anymore. "See, that's better..." He still bit the inside of his cheek. 

Hongbin chuckled. "Thank you." 

Wow, where did this flirty behaviour come from? "You're... welcome..." Hyuk was really confused. But all right. Maybe he liked flirty Hongbin. All thought he had a girlfriend... Wait... Did he? Should he ask it? Should he ask if Hongbin and Hya were together? Did he want to hear the answer? That was probably yes. Did he want to hear Hongbin say yes to his question? Well, of course not, but still. He need to know. "You and Hya, huh, are you... Together?" 

Hongbin sighed and straightened himself. "Well, she did not ask yet. Me neither... but we did do something only couples would do..." 

What? WHAT!? hyuk freaked out in his head. They had... They had ? No! No way! "Kissing..?" Hyuk asked hesitantly. Dear god, let it only be kissing...

"Y-yes," Hongbin stuttered. "And... more...." 

Hyuk stood up and looked at Hongbin with disbelief. "You... touched her?" He asked shocked.

Hongbin nodded. "And she me. But I swear that she began!" 

"I don't care!" Hyuk half yelled. "So you guys are together." 

"It's not official a relationship," Hongbin protested.

"You wish it is," Hyuk said wrecked and crossed his arms. "You ing had with her!" 

Hongbin blushed.

"And you liked it," Hyuk wispered, tears comming up. 

Ok, he needed to calm down before Hongbin got to know his feelings for him. But this, this hurt. It did hurt alot. That . That ing . And he couldn't belief that Hongbin liked it! Okay, it's not his fault and he understanded that he had with her. But his crush had with his ex. Could it be worse? 

"Hyuk..." Hongbin said and grabbed his hand. "I also have needs." Hongbin actually didn't understand why he freaked out like this. Of course he didn't.

"Yeah, yeah," Hyuk said and sat back down. His heart raged in jealousy. "I was just shocked." Just shocked? You can say you died, Hyuk. You're dead now.

"No, it's okay," Hongbin said calmly and got back to work. but after a few seconds, it looked like he gave up. "I don't understand it. Sorry." 

"No," Hyuk said straight. "It doesn't matter." It feeled as if he feeling finally left his body, but when he looked at Hongbin he felt it all again. Jealousy took his body and he drowned in his pool of hope. As if he swam peacefully and then, from the bottom of the pool, came despair and pulled him down. 

Hongbin smiled at him. "I'll go to bed now. Good night," He said still smiling and stood up.

"Yeah, sweet dreams..." Hyuk mumbled and also stood up to go to his room. when he was there he put on his pajamas and laid down on bed. It wasn't late, but okay. He wanted to escape this world. The world that seemed to hate him.

His head laid down, facing the bed sheets, which made it hard to breath. He pulled himself up and laid down in a correct way.

"Unbelievable," he said quiet. This became worse and worse.  my life... And with that thought he felt asleep. 

Oooh~you~say love me~ eotteokhaji yeogi nareul jom guhaejwoooo, I want you! 

K, lol.

So, this story got upvoted. That, my fellows, surprised me so bad!

I'm still so shocked that people read this! :D I love you guys!

And sorry for the title. I didn't know how to call this one >.<

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