"This is all your fault! YOU made me do this! If you feel hurt, blame yourself."

"Why are you crying? You made this happen."

"See what you have done."

"You're no good. Everything goes wrong because of you."

When someone blames you for so many times, even if you're faultless, slowly, you start believing what the person says. The empty words the person says become facts. Soon enough, there's another person blaming you; you. You start blaming yourself.

For so long, I lived for that person, believing that I was worthless. I was for good only when he said I was. For too long, I believed everything he said, did everything he asked me to. Not Chloe, not halmoni knew I was living just for this person. He told me to not say anything to anyone, so I didn't. I kept it to myself, trusting every word that came from him.

Is that the way a high school student should live? For a control-freak person, who can't accept his own flaws. In the end, I started to doubt him. I stopped believing it was my fault. I realized, I had to get away.

Was it easy? No. But did I do it? Yes. Does HE realize it? No.

I looked at the soju bottle in my hand before taking another gulp of the liquid. I thought of all the times I had had a similar bottle in my hand. Too many. Too many times. Unfortunately, the liquid wasn't only to have fun. It was to forget. To suppress the pain in my chest.

I didn’t want to feel it. Not any of it. In the end, the mental and physical pain was too much. It was too much for me to hold on anymore. I knew I was a coward. Weak. I got a thousand miles away, but still that person could contact me and bring me down again. Still his words hurt me.

I know Chloe didn't give him my number... She wouldn't...

I had told Chloe everything in the end. For so long, she insisted that something was wrong, and I kept telling her that it was all good. She knew me so well. She was always there when I cried. She was there even when I wouldn't tel