Jjung, Ssul and AJ: Age 14/16

“Hey guys, my parents are throwing me a birthday party at my house next week. You’re both invited of course. Can’t have my birthday without my 2 amigos,” said AJ hyung cheerily.

We were on our way home from one of our usual escapades. He playfully slung his arms around both of shoulders and pulled us in for a group hug. Sometimes I wished he wouldn’t do that because it made me slightly uncomfortable. He and Ssul were both very easy going though so they enjoyed giving me hugs just to see me squirm. They thought it was funny. Even after 6 years, I was still a little shy with our skinships but I learned to appreciate them.

“You know, in American culture, the 16^th birthday is quite important although more so for girls…” he babbled. “Still, you better get me some good presents,” he joked.

Ssul and I rolled our eyes at each other then burst into laughter. Typical hyung.

“What?” he asked in response to our laughter.

“Nothing!” we both replied at the same time and started laughing again.

“So, you’re both coming right?”

“Of course,” I answered.

“Yes oppa, we’ll be there,” Ssul added. She leaned in and whispered to me, “I need to get him a present. You want to come with me?”

I nodded.

She winked back which made me blush.

I turned my face away and shifted my attention back to hyung. “So are there going to be pretty girls there?” I asked.

“Ooo… Jjung… since when were you interested in girls?” he teased and nudged me.

I had unintentionally dug a hole for myself. I blushed even harder. “Uhm… I… I was just curious. Not that I’m interested or anything. You just always seem to have pretty girls hanging around you,” I stuttered. I peered over at Ssul to see what her reaction was. I didn’t want her to think I was girl crazy or anything like that. But when I looked over at her, her face was expressionless. I was relieved and disappointed at the same time.

“Well there’s definitely going to be a lot of people. I invited all my classmates and a bunch of other kids that I know. There’s going to be some cute guys for you too, Ssul!” he said mischievously.

She giggled and her face turned pink.

I fixed my eyes on her and I could feel my expression turning sour. I tried to hide it but I think it just made my expression more awkward.

She noticed the change in my reaction and stuck her tongue out at me.

I was taken aback. That was weird.

AJ hyung on the other hand was too busy being excited over his party to notice.

Ssul suddenly stopped in front of a shop. I wasn’t paying attention to where I was going so I accidentally walked into her.

“Oh, sorry,” I said still a little dazed.

“Jjungie, buy me an ice cream… pwease…” she whined in the most adorable manner.

It sent me into a state of shock. Is she showing me her aegyo? She’s never done that before. “Oh, uhm…” I stammered.

“Why… Don’t you want to?” (Note: In my head I’m imagining her going “Wae… shirheo?”)

I was about to answer but AJ hyung cut me off. “It’s okay Ssul, oppa will buy us all some ice cream,” he smiled.

Why did he have to do that? I was about to buy it for her! Yet again I was the bad guy while hyung was the nice one. I gave her an apologetic look but in return I got a sulky look from her. I was always so slow to react. I hated it.

“Thanks, oppa! You’re the best!” she chirped happily. She linked her arm around hyung’s and pulled him along. Again I was left to drown in my own stupidity.

Later that week, Ssul and I met up to get birthday presents for AJ hyung. I already knew what I was going to get him because he was talking about it for months now. I was going to buy him some new sneakers, red ones to be exact. I didn’t mind spending a little bit more money since he was my best friend after all, and I had convinced my parents to pitch in to help me out in exchange for doing extra house chores.

“Do you know what you’re going to get hyung?” I asked Ssul.

“Hmm, I haven’t really thought about it. I was just going to take a look around,” she shrugged.

“I already know what I’m going to get him so let’s walk around for your gift first then we can go buy mine at the end.” I pretty much decided on the plan for both of us.

She didn’t seem to mind though. “Sounds like a plan. Let’s go.”

We walked all around in search of a present. Video games? No. CDs? No. Books? No. T-shirt? No. Cellphone case? No. Hoodie? No. Backpack? No. Sunglasses? No. We were basically exhausted and running out of options.

Then suddenly, her eyes widened and she pointed to a shop in the distance. “Assa! I know what I’ll get him!” She grabbed my arm and pulled me towards the shop.

It turned out to be a custom hat shop. There were hundreds of hats to choose from and you can customize the embroidery on whatever hat you chose. It was definitely a good idea. She chose a black cap with red accents and stitching, and had the initials AJ embroidered on the cap. I knew that AJ hyung would definitely like it.

“Done!” she exclaimed as the received her change from the cashier. We thanked the cashier and headed out. “Jjung, I’m hungry. Let’s go get something to eat.” She was using her aegyo on me again. It gave me goosebumps.

I remembered how I hesitated the last time and I was determined not to this time around. “Sure!” I agreed, a little too eagerly.

She smiled, sensing that I was too eager as well.

We headed to a simple food store and ordered 2 bowls of jjajangmyeon (noodles with black bean sauce) and tangsuyuk (sweet and sour beef). We wolfed the food down as if we hadn’t eaten in days. When we were done, I paid, of course. We then went to buy my gift and just before returning home. We both pitched in and bought a rubik’s cube as a third present. It was one that changed shape as the tiles were rotated. Hyung would definitely get a kick out of it.

On the day of the party, I decided to help hyung out with the party preparations so I went over to his place early without Ssul. The party started at 6 and people started trickling in. Hyung wasn’t kidding when he said there would be a lot of people. Most of the kids were either his age or a year younger. Still I knew some of them well because hyung would always bring me along whenever he went out even when he was meeting his other friends.

“Where’s Ssul?” he asked.

I shrugged my shoulders. “Not sure. She said she would be here. She’s late though,” I commented.

Just then we heard Ssul calling towards us from the front door. There were a lot of people crowding the room so it was difficult for us to pick her out. She squeezed her way in and when she finally got to where we were my mouth gaped open.

“Ss-Ssul? Is that you?” I was speechless. Ssul was WEARING A DRESS! It was a skin-toned, knee-length evening dress with a pink ribbon tied around her waist. Her now long hair was done up with French braids wrapping around from the front like a Greek goddess. It was the first time I’ve ever seen her dressed up like that, except the few occasions when she wore a hanbook when we were younger. Dugeun, dugeun… My heart suddenly began to race. I put my hand on my chest, afraid that everyone could hear the beating of my heart. I couldn’t take my eyes off of her.

“Hey, you’re finally here!” Hyung walked over and gave her a hug. “Thanks for coming. You look great by the way.”

“Happy Birthday oppa!” she beamed and handed hyung her present. “And thanks, it’s kind of the reason why I’m late,” she explained, her face slightly flushed.

My mouth was still ajar so hyung jabbed me in the side. It managed to bring me back to my sense but I was still speechless. I just gave her an awkward smile and waved.

She chuckled and waved back.

The entire night, she became the center of attention. Every guy wanted to talk to her and even hyung was paying her extra attention. She seemed to be enjoying herself as she soaked it all up. I was beginning to get a little upset because she was totally ignoring me the entire time, so I relegated myself to the sidelines.

By 9 o’clock I was getting tired of the party. Hyung was doing his rounds, being a good host, making sure to talk to all his guests. Ssul was still crowded by a bunch of guys. I really didn’t want to stay any longer so I decided to leave, although I couldn’t just leave without a good excuse.

“Hyung, I’m really not feeling well. I think I’ll have to leave now. I’m sorry,” I lied.

“What’s wrong? Are you okay? You need my parents to take you home?” I asked in concern.

“No, no. I’ll be fine. I just need to go home and lie down. I’ll walk and get some air, that might help,” I replied, not wanting to worry him.

“Well okay. Make sure you call me when you get home so I know you got home okay. I’ll see you tomorrow?”

I nodded and then headed to leave.

I was about to walk out the door when someone tapped me on the shoulder. “And where do you think you’re going?” It was Ssul. I didn’t say goodbye to her but I didn’t think she would’ve noticed. Somehow she did.

“I’m leaving now,” I hissed.

“Why? It’s only 9. Besides I was hoping we could go home together.”

“Why don’t you just ask one of those “oppas” to take you home?!” I scoffed.

“Why are you so angry?!” she snapped back.

“Well for one thing you totally ignored me the whole night or were you too busy flirting with all the boys to notice?” I accused.

“You were the one who didn’t say a word to me the whole time,” she retorted.

“I couldn’t. You were surrounded by all those guys I couldn’t even get a word in.”

“Well, whose fault is that?”

“Yours! Just because you’re wearing that silly dress and your stupid hair done up you think you’re all that?! Tch! You look ridiculous!” As the words left my mouth, I immediately regretted it.

Before I could apologize, she burst into tears and ran away. I called after her but she wouldn’t stop. I tried chasing after her but she outran me. Idiot! Why did I say that?! I didn’t even mean it.

And then I realized… I was jealous! I was extremely, unequivocally jealous! Jealous that she was giving all those guys all her attention. Jealous that she didn’t pay any attention to me. But if I’m jealous… that means… I like Ssul?!

I raced home to see if she had gotten home safely. It was the least I could do. Her mother told me that she was home but that she didn’t want to see me. I had really hurt her. She didn’t talk to me for weeks…