Jjung and Suzy: Age 17

“You’re here again…” Suzy said as she sat down beside me.

“So are you…” I sighed.

We sat in the empty auditorium quietly; me listening to my music and she reading her book.

It’s been months now since the incident in the storage room and we were now in our second year of high school. Unexpectedly, Suzy and I became friends although we never really hung out in public. She found out that my sneaking into the auditorium wasn’t a one-time thing and ever since then she would sometimes accompany me. I still hadn’t told Ssul, AJ hyung or Luna what I was up to. But I was smart enough to make my sneaking away random so they weren’t too suspicious about it. There were a few times when they wouldn’t let me leave and I had no choice but to stay and have lunch with them.

When Suzy first found out about my “secret habit”, she invited herself to join me. I tried to get rid of her but she wouldn’t leave. After a few times, I actually found her to be great company. In many ways she was like Ssul. She was smart, funny, pretty and friendly. We didn’t really have that much similar interests but we both really enjoyed music. That was how we hit it off. The first time she invited herself to stay; I was trying to tune her out so I kept my earphone plugged in but she took one side and plugged it into her own ear. It was a bold move and I was actually quite amused.

Even though we had spent quite a number of lunches together, she never once asked why I was hiding. I never told her and she didn’t seem to mind. It was kind of refreshing really. We never asked each other about our problems unless we offer it freely and there were no judgments. Sometimes we talked but most of the time, we just spent the time quietly doing our own stuff. That was the kind of relationship we had.

Sometimes I felt really guilty that I was ditching my best friends for this girl that I hardly knew but when I was around her, all my worries melted away. Nothing else existed while we were in the auditorium. However, tried as I might Ssul was always at the back of my mind.

Even as I sat there listening to my music, the song was reminding me of Ssul. I couldn’t take it anymore. I had decided to tell her…

“Jjung… I need to tell you something,” Suzy said out of the blue.

“Hmmm?”

“Would you go on a date with me?” she asked.

I did a double take because I was sure I had misheard her. “What?”

“Would you go on a date with me?” she repeated.

I hadn’t misheard her. She really did just ask me out. My heart began to pound on my chest. I couldn’t speak. All sorts of questions were running through my head. The feeling I had just then… it was… I didn’t know what it meant. I stayed silent.

“Jjung?” She was looking for a response but I couldn’t give her one.

I swallowed hard. “Suz, why are you asking me all of a sudden?” I needed some clarity. It was just too sudden.

“It’s not sudden. I’ve liked you since you bumped into me. That’s why when Chanyeol oppa asked me out, I couldn’t say yes. I couldn’t tell you then but I finally found the courage to ask you out,” she confessed.

I just couldn’t believe what I was hearing. “W-What?! Y-You like me? Y-You like me since then?” I stammered. No one had ever confessed to me before. I didn’t know what to make of it.

“Couldn’t you tell? Why do you think I come here to find you all the time? What do you think I stayed even when you asked me to leave? Why do you think I sit here doing nothing even when you don’t say a word to me? I just wanted to be near you even if it was just for an hour in a week.”

I thought about what she had said. No one had ever liked me before. No one had ever gone through so much trouble just to be near me before. I still couldn’t give her an answer. “Suz, you’ve been a really good friend in the past year. You’ve been here for me even when we didn’t speak and just your presence give me comfort. But I’m not sure if I feel that way about you. I haven’t thought about it at all.”

She walked closer to me and took hold of my hand. It sent a shiver through my body and my heart raced even faster. It was so confusing. I had only felt this way about Ssul before… SSUL! “Look Suz… you’re a great person and I really like you but I have feelings for someone else.”

She didn’t even blink. “Does she like you back?”

“I… I don’t know. I’m not sure,” I answered truthfully.

“Then can you not give me a chance? You’re not even sure if she likes you back but I do. Can you honestly tell me that you don’t feel anything for me?”

I wanted to lie but I couldn’t. I bit my lip and shook my head.

She beamed and took my other hand. “Please Jjung. Just go out on one date with me and then decide,” she pleaded.

I hesitated. “I… I’m sorry Suz…” I finally answered. I gently pulled my hands away and walked out of the auditorium.

I walked back to class, still replaying what had happened in the auditorium just moments ago in my mind. I felt really sorry for Suz. Was I too harsh for just leaving her like that? As I approached the class, I mustered up all my courage… I was going to tell Ssul how I felt.

I entered the class looking for her. As expected she was there but there was another student there with her. He was probably another one of her admirers, trying to hit on her. I walked to the back of the class towards her with as much confidence as I could manage.

“Good, then I’ll see you on Saturday?” I heard the guy say.

“Sure. I’ll see you then,” I heard her reply. My heart sank immediately. No, it was worse; I was too late. My heart ripped into a million pieces.

I was angry. Angry at Ssul. Angry at that guy. Angry at myself! You idiot! You should have made your move sooner… Then I thought of Suz. Suz who had poured her heart out to me. Suz who so bravely asked me to give her a chance. I looked at the clock and I still had 10 minutes before class started again. I turned around immediately and ran out the door, down the hallway and back to the auditorium.

Please still be there, please. I couldn’t let her slip away too like I did Ssul. I just hoped that she hadn’t changed her mind.

I barged into the auditorium. She was still sitting in her seat with her head down. She lifted her head when she heard me come in.

“J-Jjung!?”

I ran over to her and stopped right in front of her.

I gritted my teeth. “Suz, I was an idiot. Do you still want to give this a chance?”

She flung her arms around me and pulled me into an embrace. She replied with just one word… “Yes!"