Chapter Ten!

omg it's going to be ending sooon :(

im sad i really like this story, i dont want it to end 

maybe i should write a sequal????

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 You stare at him. 'Aniyo! This isn't how I wanted him to find out!' You think trying not to cry. He didn't say anything, he just stared at you. Your heart was hurting, it made you wish you could go back in time and erase all of this. You didn't want to hurt him, you didn't want any of this. 

 "Five months?" He says to you in shock.

 Your mother stares at you sorrily as she leaves the room to let you two talk. And so you wouldn't see her crying. She couldn't believe what you just told her. You were going to die? How was this fair at all? Why did she have to be left alone. Why did you have to die when you were only seventeen!?

 She wanted to take you in her arms to a far away place and have you stay with her forever. Just the two of you and no one else. 'Wae?' She thought while sitting down and crying. She didn't want you to die. She wanted you to remember, and stay alive forever. She wanted you to have your first love, get married, have children. She wanted to be a grandmother! But now all those dreams and yours were going to down the drain.

 Then she thought of you and Jonghyun, it seemed like you two had gotten much closer in these few weeks you had been back. And you remembered him. That was all that mattered. But what if you forgot all about it again? She knew you were going to forget her very soon. Five months. She needed to talk to a doctor as soon as she possibly could.

***

 You were staring at Jonghyun. The two of you said nothing, you could only look at each other. You could feel your hands start shaking as you started crying. He looks up at you and could feel his heart start sinking. He tried his best to hold back his tears, but it did no good. They came. And you saw them.

 "Jonghyun oppa...mianhe!" You say to him wiping your eyes as much as you possibly could. They were starting to turn red, they were stinging. You wanted it all to stop. You wanted to be healthy. You wanted to stay with him forever but you knew there was no way it could happen now.

 He walks up to you and sits on your bed. He wraps his arms around you and you both sit there crying to each other. There was silence, even Taemin and Key who were standing at the doorway watching said nothing. "Key hyung, what's going to happen to her?" Taemin asks frightened.

 "I don't know Taemin." Key tells him blankly.

 "Is she going to die?" Taemin started crying. Key looks at him with wide eyes. He didn't like the sound of that. He for sure didn't want to see Jonghyun hurt. And after getting to know you so well he considered you a good friend of his. 

 You couldn't think anymore, you could feel your brain shutting down little by little. Your heart felt like it was being ripped down the middle. You grab onto the back of Jonghyun's shirt for dear life. You never wanted to let go. You were having a panic attack, your breathing became gasps of air. 

 "______ AH! SOMEONE HELP!" Jonghyun yells in shock as he realizes what was going on.

 A nurse came running in and tried to pry your hands from Jonghyun, but you wouldn't let go. If you only had five months left, you were never letting go of him. Ever. Key and Taemin come running in as well. Your mother was talking to the doctor about what was going to be happening in these five months.

 "By next month, she won't remember anything except really recent things. By the second month you'd be lucky of she could still walk. By the fourth month she won't be able to speak. The fifth month she'll be a vegetable, until her brain gives out." The doctor tells your mother knowing. 

 Your mother stares at the doctor. It was the same doctor that diagnosed you with the disease. "I thought you said it was going to be five years not five months!" Your mother yells at him. She wasn't giving him any slack, he just told her you weren't going to remember how to walk by next month! 

 "Ms. Lee, there is the alternative." The doctor tells her knowing.

 "REALLY! Well then everything should just be fine then? She won't remember anything!"

 "It is an alternative to her not dying." 

 Your mother gives him a dirty look. He had already told you all of this, but you weren't going to tell your mother you knew. You decided to see how bad it got before you decided you got any surgery or not. Maybe they were wrong. They were wrong last time, so why couldn't they be wrong now? 

 The nurse got you to calm down, you let go of Jonghyun shivering. Key and Taemin were staring at the two of you sorrily. 'Why does this have to happen now?' Key thinks shaking his head. Taemin noticed and stands there looking from Key, to you and Jonghyun. He didn't know what to do. He didn't know the situation, Key just told him briefly, and he didn't like the sound of it. 

 You notice Key and Taemin standing there. You wave them over and Jonghyun turns and smiles at them sadly. You stand and give them both hugs. "Where are Minho oppa and Onew oppa?" You ask in confusion.

 "Oh, they were just going to do something..." Jonghyun tells you knowing.

 He wasn't going to tell you that they went to talk to their manager so that he could talk to Lee Soo Man about getting you into SM. Doing anything, songwriting, singing, dancing even. He just wanted to make your dream come true. He wanted to make these last five months as happy as they possible could.

 You notice Key look at his phone and then nod to Jonghyun giving him a smile. You didn't understand it, but you thought it was best you didn't. 

 Jonghyun gives you a kiss on the top of your head and then tells you he would be right back. You nod as he leaves and goes and calls Onew. 

 "What did he say?" Jonghyun asks hurriedly.

 "Well, I showed him the lyrics you gave me from her, and he said they were really good. But because of her condition he couldn't let her be a dancer. But he did say that any song she writes, if she can sing he'll let her record them. He even said he'd release them." Onew explains excitedly.

 Jonghyun smiles to himself. He was happy, at least he could do this much for you. Onew told him that him and Minho were going to head over to the hospital now to see you. Jonghyun hangs up the phone and goes back to you room. He decided to tell you when Minho and Onew got there. 

 Your mother was back in the room with you smiling. She was hiding her true feelings, they all were and you knew it. You wanted to start crying. You shake your head at them and then lay down in your bed suddenly feeling tired. You didn't want to see the grieve on everyone's faces. You weren't dead yet!

 When Jonghyun walked in with Onew and Minho, he decided to wait for the two of them. The five of them were going to tell you all together. They walk in and smile at you. Your heart was pounding, the atmosphere seemed somewhat different now. It was weird. You take a deep breath waiting for them to tell you whatever it was they were going to tell you.

 "_________ ah, do you remember that letter you sent me with copies of the songs you wrote?" Jonghyun asks you hopefully.

 You nod remembering them. You couldn't remember what the words were, but you remembered writing them and sending them to him. You didn't want to tell him, but the songs were about him...

 "Well, I had Onew hyung and Minho show them to Lee Soo Man." Jonghyun tells you smiling widely.

 "MWUH?!" You yell in shock.

 The five of them nodded. Your heart was pounding. 'Why in the hell did they do something like that?' You think in confusion. You then realized something, if he liked them...wouldn't he use them? You felt yourself fill with happiness. "OMO CHINCHA!?" You exclaim. They nod again. 

 You clap your hands in excitement, you couldn't believe they did something like this for you. You wanted to start crying from happiness. You get up and give Jonghyun a huge hug. Along with the rest of them. Your mother looked at you proudly. Even in a time like this, you could still be happy. 

 You hold Jonghyun's hand and look at all of your friends. You were so happy, you couldn't speak. He kisses your cheek and you smile at him widely. Your mother decides to leave the six of you alone for a while, she had to go home. She knew you were safe with them, and if anything went wrong, they would call her. 

 "And that's not all!" Key tells you excitedly.

 "MWUH? THERE'S MORE!?" You exclaim smiling hugely.

 Taemin nods. He then looks over at Onew to explain. "Well, I was told that any song you wrote you'd be able to sing, as long as you wanted to. You could give them to someone else to sing. And he said all the songs would be recorded and sent out on your album which would be attached to our new one. Also, we all know you wrote the music too, so we'll need it!" Onew tells you nodding while smiling.

 You felt like you were going to die from happiness. You smile again and then thank them all. You couldn't express how thankful you were to them. You felt tears start going down your cheeks. You couldn't believe this feeling you were experiencing. You couldn't remember ever feeling this way before.

  You forgot all about being sick. You couldn't wait to record. There was only three songs you wrote, you wanted to give two of them to SHINee. But the last one, was for you. You then see the doctor walk in to see all these guys in the room with you. "Visiting hours are over in twenty minutes." He says warningly.

 You look at Jonghyun. He smiles at you and tells you he would stay with you. You thank him and then ask the doctor when you were going to be discharged. You wanted to get out of here as soon as you possibly could. You hated hospitals. But you were happy that at least Jonghyun would be here with you. 

 They all say their good-byes as you go and sit on your bed. You felt weird, it was so empty now, and you didn't like it. "Tell them to come back!" You tell Jonghyun pouting. He chuckles at you and then gives you a kiss on the lips. You smile at him and then lay down on your bed tiredly. "I think all that excitement drained me."

 "Chincha? Well then I guess you should go to sleep." He tells you smiling.

 You give him a look and then close your eyes and pretend to be asleep. You wave him over to you. He smirks and then comes and lays on the bed with you. You look at him and smile. You close your eyes and pretend to be asleep again. He chuckles at you and then pecks you on the lips. 

 You wrap your arms around his neck, he smiles and then kisses you again. You loved kissing him. You loved being with him. It was one thing you were going to miss the most when you were gone. You never wanted to forget this, or him. He's done so much for you, and you were just going to forget it all. When you pull away you sigh in sadness. You weren't going to experience a lot of things you wanted to.

 He looks at you worriedly and asks you what was wrong. You shake your head at him. When you were younger, you always dreamed about marrying him, and even having his children. But you knew now that it was never going to happen. It couldn't, you'd be dead. Unless you took the surgery. But the doctor told you there was still a chance you would die from it...

 You hold his hand and put you head into his chest. "I just realized that I'm not going to do a lot of things I thought I was." You tell him sighing.

 He looks at you sadly and then holds you close to him. "Like what?" He asks quietly.

 "Getting married, pregnancy, having kids, being a grandmother, a mother. Working, finishing school. ." You say listing off some things. You didn't know how he was going to take the last one. You weren't implying anything. You see him glance at you and then blush. 'Of course he would...' 

 He didn't know what to think. It was true, you were never going to experience any of it. Unless you took the surgery. "I'll marry you." He says to you quietly.

 You thought you heard right, but you were sure you were imagining it. He had his whole life ahead of him. You didn't want him to rush into something with you because you were going to die. You didn't want to be pitied. And you knew he knew that. 

 "Or I guess, I should ask you to marry me?" He says in thought.

 You nudge him and chuckle. 'What is he thinking?' You think smiling sweetly. You two only just confessed to each other yesterday. And now he wanted to get married? Not that you would mind. But you didn't want him to rush. You didn't want him to feel obligated because he was your boyfriend. He did enough for you. The SM thing was enough for you. You didn't want him to do this if he didn't want to.

 He looks at you softly. All you could see was love in his eyes, and hope. "________ ah, will you marry me?" He asks you smiling. You stare at him in shock. You wanted to say yes, you really did, but you didn't want him to suffer because of you. He sees the expression on your face and then understands. 'She must think I'm doing this because she thinks I feel sorry for her.' He thinks sadly.

 "Jonghyun oppa, I don't want you to do this for me." You tell him trying to hold back your tears.

 "I'm not just doing it for you. I want to be with you _________ ah, you're the only one I want. And I want to make memories with you. I want to do everything for you because I want to. Saranghae, _______." He says to you seriously.

 You smile at him as the tears come. "Saranghae, Jonghyun. And yes, I will!" 

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so that's the end of chapter ten

im going to try and update again today, but im going to be updating my other story too

ehee, how do you all like it? 

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