Haejin stirred on her bed. She faintly moaned as her eyes were slowly opened. Consciousness started to gather after a few blinks before she eventually recognized her room. Turning around, she searched for the clock on the nightstand. It showed 05.45 AM. She rubbed the sleep from her eyes, trying to fully open both of them. Using her hands on each side as support, she pushed the bed to get up. As soon as she managed to sit, her head throbbed hard that she yelped. Those rounds of gin from last night finally took its toll.

Never one who forgot everything when getting drunk, she recalled last night scene. She remembered being dragged home by Siyoung and Jaeyeon, taking shower, and going to sleep. Nothing really happened, she thought. But then her dream flashed in her mind, though vaguely. She saw Jaejoong in her dream, and he told her something. Or whispered maybe, she wasn’t sure. She tried to remember what he said, but nothing came up. After a minute, she gave up thinking about it as her head kept throbbing.

“Why did he have to appear…” she groaned while pressing her temple.

She took her time in the cold shower to ease the headache. She came down to the dining room looking all bright and pretty just like every other day. A hangover wasn’t a new thing to her, so covering it was rather easy. Although it was still twenty minutes before seven, the table was almost fully seated.

“Everybody’s early,” she announced her presence and got warm greetings in return. They all looked fine as usual, so did she, despite her pounding head. She was going to sit when her attempt got interrupted.

“Oh, you’re here!” a voice coming from the kitchen. “Just right on time, your soup is just done,” he said in smile.

Still standing in bewilderment, Haejin only goggled at him holding a bowl of hangover soup and putting it on her table. When he noticed that she wasn’t moving, he held her arms on both sides and brought her to sit. He put the spoon in her hand and motioned her to taste the soup. Though confused, she took a sip anyway. His widened eyes were full of expectation.

“It’s very delicious, thank you,” she made him smile from ear to ear. “Where is Jessica?” yet she killed that smile right away.

“Good morning, everyone!” Jessica chirped and headed straight to Jaejoong to give him a kiss on the cheek. Haejin was stunned, just like the others.

“Speak of the devil,” Jaeyeon snorted under her breath, too low for anyone but Junsu to hear. And so the rest of the breakfast time went rather gloomy.

With the painful headache, Haejin still managed to finish her schedules with no errors whatsoever. She was heading out to the hospital when Jessica suddenly popped out of nowhere.

“Haejin-ssi!” she blocked her way, making Haejin startled. Her voice was too loud and high-pitched for her head, but she didn't say. “Where are you going?”

“Oh… I’m going to hospital. Do you need anything, Jessica-ssi?” Haejin replied in a slight daze.

“Just Sica, please. Actually, I want to ask your opinion on something. It won’t be long, I promise! Okay?” she said in a sing-song tone.

Blinking in confusion toward the sudden aegyo, Haejin awkwardly nodded. Jessica jumped happily and linked her arm with Haejin’s, clinging onto the latter all the way to the mansion. Jessica took Haejin to her room and made her sit on the bed while she searched the closet.

“Here they are!” she squealed, and Haejin had to resist the urge to wince as her head throbbed. The golden haired singer laid out the things in her hands on the bed. They were baby clothes, lots of them.

“I bought them yesterday. I know it’s still too early, but I can’t help it! I want to know what you think,” she chirped in excitement.

Haejin clenched her fist inside the pocket on her coat, and it wasn't because of the headache. “They’re really cute. Your baby will look good in them,” she forced a smile.

“You think so? Jaejoong will like them too, won’t he? He better does,” she giggled.

Jessica rubbed her flat belly and spoke sweetly, “Grow fast, little baby. Your umma and appa are waiting for you.”

Haejin tightened the clench digging her nails even deeper as her heart constricted. But she was just about to face an even crueler question.

“You’re giving your blessing too, right Haejin-ssi?” Jessica asked straight to her eyes.

Taking in a breath, Haejin stood and gave her best smile. “Of course. You have my blessing, Sica-ssi. Be happy,” she lightly patted Jessica on the shoulder before leaving for hospital.

Upon her leave, Jessica sat on the bed with her face as cold as ice. “You are not going to be with Jaejoong oppa. Not on my watch.”

♦♦♦

Darkness covered half part of the globe as the night took turns with the day. Again, another sleepless night for Jaejoong. It was two hours past midnight and he didn’t even feel the least sign of slumber coming near. He glanced at his iPhone screen and sighed at the date on it. Only two more days and he would be out of here, out of her life forever. His jaw hardened at the resented thought. Feeling suffocated, he decided to take a walk outside.

He walked slowly following the stoned path, without much care about where it led to. His head was chaotic, yet it was blank at the same time. The residence was quiet, but hardly peaceful for him. Jaejoong was throwing his gaze to the pitch-black sky when he heard a faint groan.

Slightly startled, he turned to the sound and was taken aback. Haejin was limping with her hands pressing her head. His heart saddened as he knew she must be drunk again. Slowly, he took his steps toward the figure he longed to hold. And the next thing happened so fast. Stumbling on the rocky path, she lost her balance and went full speed to the ground. Jaejoong jumped in a flash with his hands stretched out.

And he caught her. Just in time her thin body about to hit the hard ground. His breathing went rapid as wild as his heartbeat. He watched Haejin shaking her head. She looked up with half-lidded eyes.

“O! Isn’t it Kim Jaejoong? Here, too? Whoa,” she slurred. Though staggering, she parted away from him. “Daebak!” she blurted with both of her thumbs shot up right in front of his nose.

She limped as her head was spinning. Jaejoong swiftly caught her waist again and leaned her weight on him. Haejin blinked several times as the whirling sensation slowly faded. She lifted her face and met his gaze. Shakily, she repositioned her feet for better support and put an arm on his shoulder.

“Hey, just between you and me,” she whispered conspiratorially. “You’re Superman, aren’t you?” she squinted. Jaejoong was dumbfounded.

Her eyes widened upon his reaction. “No? Then… Spiderman? Batman? X-Man? Or James Bond, maybe? You must have some kind of superpower…”

“You’re too drunk, Haejin-ah. I’ll take you to your room,” he said while firming his grip around her waist.

“When I’ve just finally kicked you out of my head after those shots, you easily appear in front of my eyes. What an extraordinary power,” she scoffed almost as low as a whisper.

And that stopped him. He turned his head and found her darkened face. “That baby is so lucky to have superhero daddy,” she smiled bitterly.

With the last bit of strength left, she pushed him away. But before she could took a step farther, he grabbed her arm and turned her to face him. Things were eating him inside and he could no longer bear it.

“I can’t stand any of this anymore. I want you to know what you feel and what you want, Park Haejin,” his voice agonized, though still demanding.

Haejin looked deep into his eyes for a few seconds of silence. Then she faintly shook her head, trying to release herself from his grip. Of course, her effort went in vain. He even tightened the grip on both of her arms.

“Stop walking away from me!” he raised his voice in frustration. “You’re hurt, aren’t you? Why do you hide it from me? Don’t you have any feelings for me? Have you actually fallen for me?” Everything he held in just burst out.

She only kept her eyes on his as she listened to him. Weakly, she lifted her hand to his shoulder and gently patted it. Strangely, although he was overwhelmed by distress and pain, that soft comfort from her still calmed a part of him. She limped again in his grip, turning him into panic state. He was going to take her to the Medical Unit, but she motioned him to the nearest bench.

“You once asked me, why I never blushed, trembled, or wavered around you. You told me you couldn’t understand why I didn’t fall for you. Do you remember that?” she asked once they were settled down face-to-face. He was expecting answers instead of another question from her, but he nodded anyway.

“Well, have you found the answer to those?” she tilted her head, discreetly enduring the toll of all those gins she downed.

He sighed in defeat. “No? It’s an easy one, you know,” her voice thinned. Fixing his pained gaze on hers, Jaejoong stayed silent. She somberly smiled.

“It’s because I’ve already fallen for you, stupid. Since long ago.” A tear fell on her smile.

Jaejoong froze, shocked to the core of his being. Totally the opposite, Haejin who was still wearing a sad smile looked very calm. She saw palpable confusion in his eyes, and she didn’t wonder. Leaning forward to his left, she pulled up his black training up to his knee. It startled Jaejoong, but he didn’t mind—he was confused. Then he felt the tip of her finger tracing a line on the side of his calf.

“It really didn’t leave a scar. Guess I did pretty well,” she mumbled. Another tear fell. His brows knitted together as he quickly flashed back to a particular day three years ago. It couldn’t be…

“You were that doctor?” his voice raised unintentionally. She only smiled. And everything just came to light. Now he understood the déjà vu he felt when she stitched up his arm the other day.

“It was my first outdoor operation after joining The Safe House. If you remember, I was with Kim Hyun Joong,” she recalled. His memories became clearer.

“Yes, and I was heading out first, but sasaengs suddenly flooded in front of the restaurant. I intended to escape through the storage room…”

“And you hurt your leg. It was a glass piece, right?” she finished it for him. Jaejoong nodded, still finding it hard to believe. A piece of memory flashed on his mind.

“Don't worry, I'm a doctor. Just follow my instructions, it will leave no scar.”

“You also promised that it wouldn’t leave scar, just like the last time,” he said. His lips vaguely twitched.

Haejin nodded. “As cheesy as this may sound, that was when I fell in love with you. Helplessly,” she chuckled bitterly. A drop of tear rolled down on her cheek, but she quickly wiped it with her fingers.

“I realized that it was impossible. I knew clearly that I shouldn’t feel what I felt for you, and I tried to get rid of it. I really did try everything. Work, alcohol, extreme sports… you name it. None of those worked,” she paused to catch a breath as she began to feel suffocated.

Another piece of puzzle found its place in his head. That explained the incident 3 years ago that Chief and the girls dreaded so much; a period when Haejin intoxicated herself every night that the Chief decided to cut the gin supplies. That was because of him. Just like this time, too.

“I even socialized more, although I hated it. I was hoping to find someone else to fall in love with, but it all came to no avail. Until at one point I eventually gave up. I decided to live with it, and I did. That was why I seemed to be indifferent towards feelings and all love-related things,” she explained while pressing her temple every once in a while.

“And of course, that was also the very reason I never trembled for your womanizing attempts, Mr. Casanova,” she tried to lighten up the tension.

“Anyways, I’ve told you everything. You’re the only living thing I share all of this with, you know. Now that you know the truth, please stop hurting, would you? I’m barely surviving already, it's too much for me if I have to see you suffer too,” she honestly asked.

“Haejin-ah…” he was lost of words for the emotions wildly gushed inside.

Thinking that he was feeling sorry for her, Haejin lightly pressed his shoulder. “Don’t worry about me. Just mind yourself and your new little family, okay? I’m leaving,” she stood up limply and stepped away.

He looked at her furthering back. Right on that moment, he knew what he wanted, and what he had to do. Without wasting another second, he strode toward her and caught her arm, turning her to face him. He locked her eyes with his firm ones.

“You’re not going anywhere, Park Haejin. You have to listen to what I want to say, but not in this state. I want you to be completely sober. So I’ll make sure that’s what we’re gonna do first thing in the morning,” he demanded.

Frowning, she asked, “How?”

He didn’t answer that one, but he scooped her into his arm instead. She gasped and stiffened, but didn’t have enough strength to pry on him. Besides, just by one look at his face, she knew it’d be useless. No intention to rush, he walked casually to the main house. He greeted the receptionists when entering the lobby, and was greeted back. It wasn’t their first time seeing Jaejoong and Haejin together, so they didn’t bother.

Already familiar with the place, he only stopped when they were in front of her door. He lowered his body, making it easier for her to enter the passcode. She didn’t cover her hand when pressing it, deliberately letting him see.

“1010?” he asked just out of curiosity. She casually nodded, “They’re alphabets. Do the counting yourself.”

As he walked to the bed, he mentally spelled the alphabets. The tenth letter was J, so 1010 would mean…

Jaejoong stopped and looked down to meet her gaze. She snorted, mumbled something like 'get over it' which made him laughed. It was his first real laughter in the last few days. He put her on the bed and covered most part of her body. She felt sleepy as soon as she breathed the homely scent and her head touched the pillow. Though half of her mind was already drifting off, she still felt the other side of the bed sinking. Before she managed to turn, a firm arm folded around her, wrapping her in warmth. Reflexive, her muscles stiffened.

“Sleep. See you in the morning,” he whispered in her ear and gently left a kiss on her temple.

Thank you for reading and commenting, lovely readers! Sending a huge bear hug to inayester and phoertes for subscribing ^^

I hope you like this one. I'm glad Haejin can stop hurting now ;)

Let me know what you think! Love you readers~ :D