"Do you believe in fireflies?"

No one pays attention to an ugly duckling. Everyone’s attention is on the beautiful swan. I, am the ugly duckling. Do you, believe in fireflies?

It’s a perfect day for normal people to enjoy their life. But for me, it’s just another day of suffering. Waiting is never enjoyable. But for me, waiting is already a habit. I wait for people to come, to understand me, and to give me a chance. A life –changing opportunity, from an ugly duckling become a beautiful swan. But people expect me to change by myself.

The television is on, but no one is paying attention to it. They are busy minding their own business. Kids learning alphabets, teens texting, and staffs walking around.  This, is an orphanage. Everyone is waiting. But I am the longest one waiting.  People walk into the orphanage and find a suitable one to their own taste. Staffs don’t care where the people will take us to, they want us to go as quick as possible. Once the money is on their hand, we will become the goods, sold to other people.

I was here since I was six. Twelve years of waiting. I am the oldest in the orphanage, and the one with most hatred. Nobody likes me. Everyone hates me, including my sister.  She was here with me since she was four. But someone bought her. Nobody knows where she goes, nobody knows how is her life. But for one thing I am sure, she hates me. She hates my guts, my relationship with her, my everything.

“Soo Ra, stop dreaming and help me with this,” Ana, one of the oldest staff said. She is the kindest person I have seen in the world. She is the only staff that cares about us, and about the life we are going to have after. I smiled and walk towards her. She got a bucket full of laundry. Folding laundry, again. “How is my little princess doing?” Ana smiled lovingly while handing few of the clothes. “The same,” she sighed. I know she is disappointed by my answer, but there is nothing I can do, or say.

“Why don’t you try to talk to them? Hmm?” this time, I am the one to sigh. “They hate me, and there is nothing I can do about it,” Ana looks at me sadly. I hate that kind of eyes. I don’t want people’s sympathy. To me, it’s like a sarcasm. But I didn’t say anything. At least not to Ana. I smiled and continue to fold the laundry. It’s morning, but to me, it’s always dark in my heart.

The bell on the door jingled, it makes a soft sound, but I always pay attention to it. Because to me, every jingle means a new hope for me. A woman walks to the counter and takes off her sunglasses. She is wearing a black coat, as if it is winter time. Her handbag was made from leather and so is her boots. Remember Cinderella? She is the total opposite of her. I stop folding and look at Ana. She gives me a small nod, gesturing me to sit in the living room so that I can be noticed. I smiled and walk over.

“…I think the age between 18 to 20 will be great,” my heart beats a little faster upon hearing that. I may be the one. The staff searches around the room and when she looks at me, she stops for a few seconds. Then, she starts to search again. My heart sank. “I am sorry miss, but there is a 17 years old one, do you want to meet her?” the women thought for a few seconds before nodding her head. Soon enough, Hanna, the second oldest was brought into the room the women is waiting. Hanna checks her clothing before entering.

I look at the door and wait for them to come out. The staff sits beside me and smirked. “She seems to be rich, and you don’t deserve that,” I look at her and her smirk became bigger and looks more evil. After she left, I mentally cursed her. To death. After a few minutes that seem to be like a few hours, Hanna came out. Her eyes were shining. She was sold. And I need to wait longer. The women walks out a few minutes after, a smile is plastering on her face, I guess she is really happy with her decision.

When she looks at me, she stops walking. I looked away. I can hear her boots’ sound growing louder. “May I ask how old are you?” I look at her, confirming she is asking me the question. “18,” the women smiled. My hope is getting high again, higher than just now. “What is your name?” I played with my fingers. “Han Soo Ra,” the women sits beside me. “How long have you been here?” I sighed. I don’t like it when people asked me such question, it sounds like they are mocking me. “12 years,” the women’s eyes grow wider. Just as she is ready to ask me another question, Hanna walks out, with a small luggage on her hand. The women stood up and smiles. “I am sorry, but I want Soo Ra,“ my jaw drops. I am not dreaming, right?