Kibum's knees buckled out from underneath him and his stomach twisted while he fought hard not to start hyperventilating, his vision getting so blurry from dizziness that he only saw shapes.

Oh. My. God.

“Kibum?” Minho said lowly in an alarmed voice and put his hand on his shoulder.

He just shook his head, not knowing what to say as he heard three sets of feet rush forward, talking in worried voices. But somehow it sounded like he was hearing them through water and all he could discern was mumbles.

He was there. It was him.

“Kibum!” Minho's voice broke through the water barrier and Kibum's eyes refocused on the edge of the counter. Then he braced himself and looked up.

Jinki, Taemin and Minho were huddled around him, looking extremely worried. However, Kibum barely registered them as he looked over their heads with a pounding heart at the new customer.

Jonghyun looked back at him, worry written in every line of his face, and when their eyes met Kibum thought he seriously would combust spontaneously. All the feelings from a year ago came rushing back to him and he was hit with full force, making him lose his breath and his sanity all at once. His heart really couldn’t take all these surprises and he probably would die young because of the irregular heartbeats everyone kept giving him.

“Kibum, are you okay?” Minho's worried voice sounded in his ear and he nodded slowly, not able to tear his gaze away from Jonghyun.

He had changed slightly. His hair was not brown anymore but toned into three different shades, starting with blond at the front and growing darker at the back. And he looked lighter, somehow. Like he had thrown off a heavy weight from his shoulders and was now fully enjoying and loving life again. He looked so calm. Kibum couldn’t help the tears that once again gathered in his eyes, making a lump form in his throat.

He’s alright… he is alright…

“Uhm…” Jonghyun said hesitantly. His voice was filling Kibum’s insides with what seemed like helium and he felt like just floating away, keeping that voice forever in his mind. “Is everything okay?”

“I don’t know.” Taemin said uncertainly.

Minho and Jinki managed to pull Kibum to his feet, keeping him in a steady grip, while he continued to stare at Jonghyun with wide eyes, not daring to blink in fear of him disappearing.

“Hyung,” Minho said irritated and turned to the addressed when he saw that Kibum was properly standing, “what are you doing here?”

Jonghyun shrugged, scratching his head sheepishly and Kibum's heart clenched slightly.

“Well, you told me to come during opening hours and it is now…” He looked at his wristwatch, “seven-fifty-five, which means I have five minutes.”

Minho groaned and the other two snorted. “Of course you would do this.”

Jonghyun glanced back at Kibum. “Is your colleague alright?”

Kibum bit his lip and a tear slid down his cheek.

Of course Jonghyun wouldn’t recognize him.

But still, all he wanted to do was reach over the counter, pull Jonghyun into a tight hug, kiss him and never let go.

“Sorry, did I say something wrong?” Jonghyun asked, flustered at seeing Kibum's tears. “Sorry, I didn’t mean it in a bad way.”

The other three stared at him as well and Minho squeezed his shoulder.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” He asked. “Does anything hurt? You did hit your head pretty hard earlier.”

Kibum shook his head slowly and forced himself to blink, clearing his throat. Then he turned to Minho, not looking away from Jonghyun until he absolutely had to.

“I-I was just… surprised…” He stammered and turned back to Jonghyun, taking a deep breath. “I’m sorry, it’s just that…”

He stopped.

What could he say?

He swallowed down the rest of his tears and managed to smile slightly. “You just look like someone I used to know… I got a small shock, that’s all.”

Jonghyun's eyes softened and it made Kibum want to bawl his own out remembering the last time he had seen them like that.

“Oh,” he said softly, “I’m sorry.”

Kibum shook his head again. “It’s not your fault.”

Minho let out a sigh and everyone looked at him.

“Good lord, your head can be quite thick sometimes.” He said, looking at Jonghyun in pretended defeat.

“Hey!” Jonghyun complained with a pout. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

Minho shook his head and laughed. “That you have a tendency to be bad at timing and such stuff.”

Jonghyun grumbled while Taemin and Jinki laughed.

“Anyway,” Minho continued with a crooked smile, pointing at Kibum, “this is Kim Kibum”

Jonghyun nodded at Kibum with a smile. “Hi.”

Kibum tried to return the smile, but he was afraid that it looked more like a grimace and he refrained from speaking since he probably would say something stupid.

“And Kibum this is my other friend, Kim Jonghyun.”

Jonghyun glared at Minho. “What do you mean ‘other friend’? We’re best friends, idiot!”

“Yeah, yeah.” Minho waved his hands nonchalantly and Kibum felt the corners of his mouth tug slightly. “What does the best friend want? Tea? Coffee? Chocolate?”

Jonghyun's glare was immediately replaced with shining eyes, making Kibum's heart almost fly out of his chest. His brain activity was slowing down and all his thoughts seemed to stop as he watched Jonghyun with all his expressions.

He was so different.

“Hot chocolate with a spoon of sugar, whipped cream and tiny marshmallows and chocolate-flakes on top!” Jonghyun said excitedly.

Minho shook his head at him with an amused expression before turning to the others.

“How about you?”

Jinki smiled at him. “Tea, please.”

“I want hot cocoa as well!” Taemin said cheerily still scratching Jin behind his ear. “But not the diabetes-bomb Jonghyun-Hyung ordered. Just cocoa without anything.”

“Okay,” Minho said and turned to the coffee machine, “Go sit down and I’ll make it for you.”

“Thanks a bunch!” Taemin and Jonghyun said at the same time, laughing.

“Thanks, Minho.” Jinki said with a smile while the other two took a seat by the window. “How much?”

Kibum's brain somehow started up again, slowly, and he shook his head with a small smile.

“It’s on us.” He said, cutting Minho who was about to say something off.

Minho looked at him slightly surprised, but cracked up in a big smile and nodded at Jinki.

“Yeah, go sit down.”

Jinki smiled at both of them and joined the other two, who were now preoccupied with Jin.

“Is it really okay?” Minho murmured as he started making the orders. “What about Sunny-Noona? She won’t be mad?”

Kibum let out a small laugh and grabbed the box of teabags. “No… she’d actually be happy that I did this because my only friends are her and Mir s-”

Kibum cut short and looked up at Minho who raised his eyebrows at him.

“Well, you have me too now… if you want, I mean.” He said hesitantly.

Kibum felt the void in his chest strangely move and had to let out a small gasp. Thankfully, it went unnoticed by the other and he forced a smile.

“Sure.” His voice sounded strangled. “That’d be nice.”

Minho smiled, pointing at the others. “And those three as well, I would think.”

Kibum continued to smile forcibly, while his insides felt like they were crumbling.

It’s okay… it’s okay… just start over…

“You can go sit down, too.” Minho said with a nod in the direction of his friends. “You don’t have to strain yourself.”

“It’s alright.” Kibum said and handed him the jar of small marshmallows.

He didn’t think he could handle sitting with Jonghyun just yet. Minho shrugged and sprinkled chocolate on top of the whipped cream, adding a few marshmallows here and there.

“D’you want something?” Minho asked when he had finished Taemin and Jonghyun's hot chocolate and Kibum had poured up Jinki's tea.

He shook his head. “I’m good.”

Minho smiled at him. “I’ll bring two glasses of water anyway.”

Then he put everything on a tray and led the way to the table where the other three were sitting.

Kibum tried to talk to them like usual, be friendly. He really did. But it was hard to communicate and act normal when his head was swimming with memories from a year ago and all he felt like doing was burst into tears and sob out how much he had missed them. Luckily for him, he didn’t have to strain himself too much with conversation since Taemin and Jonghyun were continuously fooling around, cuddling with Jin and joking while Minho and Jinki laughed and kept the conversation going. This left Kibum the only one sitting quietly, biting his lip and staring at the table in an attempt not to cry or scream.

“So…” Kibum said and cleared his throat. After having been quiet for too long he felt like he needed to say something out of courtesy. “H-how do you all know each other?”

Jinki who was sitting on his left side smiled and put his cup down.

“Well, Jonghyun is our next door neighbor and Minho came into the picture by being his best friend.”

“Yeah,” Minho who was sitting to his right said amusedly, “and suddenly we were all hanging out together when we could.”

“O-oh.” Kibum stammered. “That seems like fun.”

“We’ll invite you too next time!” Taemin exclaimed happily from his seat in front of him. “I like you! Although you seem a bit shy.”

Kibum's head snapped up and he stared at the boy with wide eyes, dangerously close to hyperventilating and crumbling on the spot.

Why? Just why?

He stood up hastily and swayed a little, his head spinning.

“Are you alright?” All four of them asked at the same time.

“Uh…” Kibum said.

His eyes met Jonghyun's and suddenly he found himself praying that he wouldn’t say anything, because if he heard the other’s voice again he would lose it completely.

“I-I think I need to go lie down again?” He said, but it came out as a question.

He grabbed Jin who had made himself comfortable on another chair and pressed him close for comfort.

“It was nice meeting all of you.” He mumbled then before dashing to the stairs, trusting Minho with closing the café.

He fell to his knees as soon as the door closed behind him and Jin leaped out of his arms, strutting over to the sofa in the small living room and curling up on it. That was all Kibum's eyes managed to see before they overflowed with tears and he broke down, heaving sobs and breathing so irregularly that his head felt light and dizzy.

“One year…” He whimpered through breaths and sobs.

Jin looked up at him curiously from the sofa, his tail twitching probably contemplating on whether to go to Kibum or not.

“One. ing. Year!” Kibum suddenly yelled, his voice braking slightly, and made Jin jump. “And they decide to come back! Without remembering even!”

He didn’t know why he felt angry so suddenly, but he was. He was angry and lonely and sad and happy and hopeful. There were so many emotions tumbling through him that he thought he would be sick and he clambered to his feet, staggering to the toilet where he threw up.

How was he ever going to live through this?

A/N: And a wild Jonghyun appeared!!! Haha! ;P Who was expecting this? Hm? xD

Okay, now I don't have much else to say... :/ Do I update to fast?

Anyhow, I still haven't decided on the Q&A yet @_@ But when I do you'll notice >_<

Sooo, I hope you enjoyed! ^_^ And as always, thanks to ALL of you!! <3

Bye~! <3