“What’s your favorite color, hyung?”

We lie down on the floor, staring at the ceiling above us. He lies right next to me and I hold his hand. His hand feels so soft against mine, and I continuously rubbing his knuckles. He seems to love it because he keeps tightening his grip.

“I don’t have particular favorite color, but right now I love brown.”

“Why is that?”

I turn my head, facing him, “It’s because your eyes’ color is brown.”

He blushes, “You’re a romantic man.”

We laugh together and he turns his body around, hugging me. He leans his head against my chest and I his hair lovingly. Should I kiss his forehead? I take a glance of his face. I should. I kiss his forehead and he rubs my chest in respond.

“What about you? What’s your favorite color, Seunghyun-ah?”

“I never have one.”

“Why?”

“I love every color.”

I stare at the ceiling above me as I remember his cry the night before. Should I try to ask him again? I look down to him the same time he looks up to me and we smile together. Maybe I should.

“It’s amazing.” I think my brain is doing things on its own.

“What’s amazing?”

“How people can fall in love with just one quick glance.”

He laughs sweetly, “Yes, it’s amazing. Life can be unpredictable sometimes.”

“Seunghyun-ah?” I really have to ask him now.

“Yes, hyung?”

“I need to pee.” My brain is undoubtedly damaged.

He laughs and he let go of his hands, “Sure.”

I get up and I walk to the bathroom while cursing myself. Why couldn’t I ask him such simple question? Well, maybe it’s not that simple, it’s kind of private, I know. But still, why the hell couldn’t I ask him and excuse myself instead? ‘I need to pee,’ way to go, brain.

I stop as I stand before the bathroom’s door and I look back to where Seunghyun is. He tilts his head to the side and looks at me while smiling. I can only smile back to him and I hold the door’s knob, still in dilemma. Second thought, maybe later.

I enter the bathroom and I stare at myself through the mirror. The man in the mirror looks small and his dark hair is in disarray. His hazel eyes remain the same; still keeping secrets and pain from long ago. The man pulls his hair and looks frustrated. He has always been frustrated with himself.

“You’re a coward, and no one from my family is a coward.”

My father’s words have always slapped me, even until today. I have never made him proud; I have never seen him smiling for my achievements. But, I am a coward. If I were brave I wouldn’t have to be so lonely even though I’m different. I wouldn’t have to excuse myself every time I’m scared or in doubt.

I exhale as I flush the toilet just to make Seunghyun believes that I really peed. I walk out from the bathroom and I find him still sitting on the floor. He smiles at me and I step forward, closer to him, as I make up my mind. But he talks before me and I bury down my desire to ask.

“Hyung, what took you so long?”

“I was thinking.” My brain is so not cooperating.

“What were you thinking?”

“You.”

He blushes, “You were thinking about me?”

I nod, “Yes, I was thinking about you.” I was wondering what made you cry.

He beams, “May I know what was you thinking about me?”

“What made-” I cough, “How was your life before this.” This isn’t good either, idiot.

He pats the empty space beside him, telling me to sit next to him, so I walk closer and sit beside him.

“I was a singer, well, a trainee in a company.”

“You’re not anymore?”

He shakes his head, “Not anymore,” he continues as I don’t give him any respond, “it’s not for me.”

“Life as an entertainer is hard.” Since when did you know everything, Jiyong-ah? Shut your mouth for God’s sake.

He chuckles lowly, “It was hard. I had to practice every single day and I couldn’t really express myself. I was like a robot that had to sing every crap songs they made.”

I nod and he continues, “Then I messed up. Well, it wasn’t my entire fault, actually. I was forced to go to the club every day when I was underage. But my CEO caught that and I was doomed. My career ended but somehow I feel glad. I am free.”

“So you never got to debut?”

He shakes his head, “Never. It’s all thanks to him.”

“Who’s him?” I ask carefully, or maybe not that careful.

“The one who made me realize who I really am and also the one who tricked me.”

“I don’t think I understand.”

“He made me realize that I’m, well, different. But he also tricked me.”

I nod, “He was the one who made you cry.”

He nods, “I cried because I was angry.” He smiles, “It’s just my habit to cry every time I’m angry, I’m that emotional.”

I smile a little and he continues, “I thought he loves me and I thought I love him, but I never did. We never did. He was only using me, I was like his toy.”

He looks at me, “How was yours, hyung?”

“Well, uh, mine was dull, plain. I have always been pretending and I never actually feel companied. I was always lonely even though I have so many friends.”

“Why was that so?”

“Because I was afraid of being different.”

“You were afraid of others’ judgment about you?”

I nod, “And I also afraid to fall in love, because it was never work out.”

“Are you still afraid to fall in love now?”

“To be honest, I do, a little.”

“What made you?”

“Well, you know,” I look up to the ceiling, “I have never been in love like this.”

“Are you worrying about the future?”

“Yes, kind of.”

He wraps his arms around me and he buries his head onto my neck, “Don’t be, there’s nothing to be worry about.”

I hold him back, “I hope so.”

“You sound pessimistic.”

“I have never been optimistic.”

“Let me help you, then.”

I look down to him. His lip is irresistible. I gaze into his eyes and without realizing I have drowned in his beauty. I lean my face closer to his and I press his lips softly with mine. His lips taste sweet and soft, I can’t get enough of the feeling.

He kisses me back and I push him down as we kiss. He lies under me and I put my hand under his head. I caress his hair to his neck lovingly and I can feel his hand caressing mine. His skin feels so soft against mine, it feels intoxicating.

“Love me.”

I kiss him deeper in respond and he moans a little. I love you. I slip my tongue inside his mouth and I explore it. Every inch of him tastes sweet and intoxicating me more. I love you. His breath tickles my neck and he moans again.

“Love me.”

“I love you,” I manage to say between the kiss, “I love you,” and I don’t know until when will I stop kissing and saying ‘I love you’ to him.

I begin to kiss his jawline, his cheeks, his nose, every single bit of him. I want him, I want him, and I want only him. He pulls my hair a little and he moans again.

“Love me.”

“I love you.”

I kiss his collarbone and he trembles. I kiss his chest and he moans. I can’t stop kissing him and I can’t stop being intoxicated by him.

“Let’s start a new life together.”

He nods and I kiss his lips, “I’ll never make you talk about sadness.”

I kiss his eyes, “I’ll never make you cry.”

I kiss his earlobe, “I’ll never make you listen to anything bad.”

I kiss his lips again, “I’ll love you with everything I have, and I’ll love you forever.”

I kiss him again and on that very moment I know, I’m not a bit scared anymore. My doubts have washed away and I’m sure that there’s nothing stronger than my love for him. I love him and I want him.

Let me know what you guys think about this chapter! I hope you love this! <3

Aaaand...it'll get fluffier chapter by chapter xD