Thunder’s POV

3:05 am

I couldn’t sleep at all.

I tried to get some rest but I can’t. My mind is in a huge mess and I don’t know what to do. Why did he have to say those words? Why did he have to pour out his real feelings for me when I’m in this vulnerable state?

Flashback:

“I know that this is not easy to take in especially since this is not the right time to confess these feelings I have for you.” He lowered his head.

“Hyung...” It’s hard to believe that all of these are happening. I never thought that he loves me.

He then turned up and looked at me with seriousness. “Listen to me Sanghyun.” I couldn’t help but stare at his beautiful brown eyes. “Don’t let yourself be hurt anymore. Leave him please... leave him.”

This time it’s my turn to lower my head. “Hyung... Why can’t you understand? I – I love him.”

“Yeah I can clearly see that.” He sighed. “But he is hurting you and he doesn’t even care. Do you want things to stay like this?”

“...” Do I want to stay this way?

“I love you Sanghyun.” My heart leaped hearing those words from his mouth again but I just couldn’t love him back, not like this. Not like this when Seungho hyung is still the one inside my heart.

“I’m grateful for your words hyung but... I don’t feel the same way. I can’t reciprocate your feelings.” I turn to look at him. Guilt washed over me. He was very broken, it was like I was looking at my reflection, crushed and rejected.

I should have never said that.

“Hyung I’m sor—“

“No! Don’t be.” He stopped me from speaking any further. I saw a tear slipped from his eyes before he turn his back on me.

“I know, I ing damn know.” I saw him gripped his knuckles and shook on his place.

Seeing him like that, I felt like I was the most horrible human being.

“But...” I heard him speak, his back is still in front of me.

“You should understand that he doesn’t love you anymore and will hurt you even more.” he said.

My breath hitched. He was right but what am I to do? I love him still. “Yeah,”

Suddenly Joonie hyung went to me and grabbed my head. All that I felt was his warm soft lips that gently pecked mine.

Then he carefully held my cheeks on his big hands and made me stare right through his eyes. I was frozen on my spot the whole time.

He kissed me.

He caressed my cheeks with affection. “Even though your heart was still his, I will never give up on you. Now that I know that he was hurting you I will never let you go again.”

No, don’t make me feel this way.

“I love you and I always will.” Then he kissed me again. But this time, not just a peck but a long sweet kiss.

I couldn’t even move.

Thump.

 No. My heart.

“I’ll wait for you to love me back.” Then he smiled. “Remember that.”

“I- ah hy-hyu- wha- what? You- hy-hyung what?” The whole thing happened so fast that no sensible words would come out of my mouth. Even my expression couldn’t be explained.

“Yah hahaha! You looked funny! Stop doing that!” He burst out laughing like nothing happened a while ago.

I pouted then this time he gave me a rare gentle smile that he never shows off. “Come on, let’s go home.”

End of Flashback

“Argh I couldn’t sleep at all.” I harshly sat up and ruffled my hair in frustration. It’s been a few hours already since we went home and I should be sleeping now.

Ah that pabo hyung!

He is messing my thoughts and forcing himself to come inside my dream every time I get a chance to blink a sleep.

That hyung. That idiot sweet hyung. My hyung who is always there for me.

I chuckled to myself thinking about all the fun and stupid things we did together. I really am comfortable being with him.

I smiled wide just thinking of him.

Ah I’m thirsty.

From my bed I got up to open the lamp on my table still smiling from thinking about my Joonie hyung. Then it hit me... when I saw it. The picture frame on my table, me and him.

I almost forgot him and his wrong doings.