Chapter Seventeen

[Seohyun’s POV]

I didn’t attend my singing class. Waiting for the bus, I am staring blankly from afar. What did I do, Seohyun?

“I am sorry again Seohyun. I tried to be a guardian angel in the first place but I think I can’t. I know that you learn how to open up but I lied to myself that no. I know that you learn to find what love is when I, who existed longer than you still don’t know what love is…”

You hurt someone, Hermione.

“Who are you?” I asked.

Your inner self, talking to you again!

I rolled my eyes. Is this even possible? There is someone inside me?

Yeah. It’s what you call conscience.

“Whatever.” I replied. The bus stop in front of me, upon entering the bus I don’t know where I am going. Absentmindedly I take the second to the last seat of the right side of the bus. Staring out from a far, I didn’t realize that I am watching the clouds.

I wonder where Luhan is. I should say sorry to him. It’s my fault in the first place, I can only see Luhan and I am pretty sure that he will not like tell to the world about Sungjae and Shinyeong. I sighed, “Wherever are you Luhan I hope you’re safe,” I whispered and close my eyes.

I feel like I have closed my eyes for a minute. The bus stop and I realize where am I. I am just a couple of blocks away from Appa’s haven. I don’t know what I am thinking but I just let my feet drag me out of the bus all the way to the cemetery.

“Appa,” I said softly as I take my sit in front of him and pay my own respects.

“How are you, appa?” I asked him even if I know to myself that he not reply back. “I know you will not answer me, appa.” I smiled sheepishly.

“You know appa, I hurt someone special to me. Yes, appa your heard me right.” I paused. “His name is Luhan. Sorry appa if I haven’t shared it to you the last time I come. I am in a bad shape and even worst today.”

The wind blows softly. I know my eyes were red enough and somebody can say that I am holding my tears back that I am not going to deny.  “Appa, is keeping a secret bad? I mean, is protecting two persons bad? Why can’t I explain this to Luhan? He called me immature for fighting back against those girls. What does he mean about it? I will not fight back to those girls and let them call me when it is not true? I don’t understand it appa. I don’t.” I shake my head trying to remember everything. From the bus moments till the rooftop fight. I know it’s my fault that I shouted at him in the first place. I acted very childish in front of him. I owe Luhan. I should share this to him. “Appa, I already understand the whole point. It’s my fault appa, I should let Luhan know everything. We both misunderstand the whole thing and we need to talk appa. Will you guide me appa?”

I waited for seconds. Thinking he will reply. Thinking that I will be feeling his presence again, I was about to stand up when a white butterfly stop by my father’s tomb. I don’t know why a butterfly is here but I think of it as my appa. He will guide me. He will help me. Appa is here right by me side.

“Thank you appa,” I smiled and bowed in his tomb before leaving. The butterfly flock its wings and I raise my forefinger to see if it will cling on it and it did. It made me smile. It made my heart warm which is a good feeling.

I started walking down the cemetery when I heard my name. I stop for a while and try to listen again but I only heard these words: “…the girl that I talk about now and way back then.”

I turn around and saw a guy wearing a uniform. He’s from my school and I am very sure of it. I stop two feet away from his side; I want to know who this is. When he was about to stand up, I realize who is this. “Sungjae~ah?” I called out.

He looked at me with a shock expression. I remained my plain expression on him. “What are you doing here?” both of us asked each other.

“You first,” I said before he speak.

“I am visiting my parents.” He motions his hands, I followed it and saw where his parents are. I didn’t say anything but I just stared at them. “Eomma, Appa I think I don’t to go back with her, she’s here, Seo Joohyun is here unexpectedly.”

I looked at Sungjae with a confused look. What is this guy saying? I don’t get it. He takes a step forward and grab my wrist. “Eomma, Appa.” His hands leave my wrist and rested on my shoulders. “She’s the girl that I am talking about for the past years,” as he continuously talking to his parents. He is happy as I watch him talking as if they were alive and literally in front of us. “Eomma, Appa even though she’s’ cold, she don’t care to anybody else I am very thankful that she protect Shinyeong. I don’t care if she even whispered to me that she would be my worst nightmare which she could mean that she’ll really mess everything about me. Well, I am your son. You guys know that I don’t quit with this fight. Haven’t I told you guys that I am her midnight phantom? Yes, silent as a cat….” I open my mouth to protest. Is Sungjae’s mind still working? “I can you imagine eomma, appa shouting at me to respect her or treat her gently…be a gentleman that’s what you would be saying to me appa,”

“Seaweed brain,” I mutter.

He stop for a moment and he looked at me with a what-question in his face. “Don’t mind me.” He put his tongue out and