Fact: January 26, 2013 -- Gwanghwamun Sonata  ; January 26/27, 2013 -- Here I Am 

- - - 

The intense buzzing sound came from his left side, somewhere on his bedside table. He groaned, turning towards it as he hit the snooze button off. It was only six in the morning and already, he felt so miserable.

He had been for the past few days now, to be honest. A lot of things have been eating his time. Several photoshoots, tapings, interviews, (last night's) musical appearance and of course the thought that he's been the worst man alive by how he's running his life lately.

To start, Yunho's been keeping secrets from Changmin. Then he broke Ara's heart. And just last night, he couldn't even attend BoA's first Korean concert when he knew it was a special milestone for her, and that no matter what, he should be there to witness it for himself. He just kept on disappointing everybody.

Especially BoA.

'And I call myself her bestfriend.' And I tell her I love her...

He squeezed his eyes shut for a long minute before he got up from his bed to start another miserable day.

He groaned some more as he sat on the edge of the bed. He could already see the morning sunlight dancing behind the white curtains of his empty hotel.

But somehow it was suffocating.

He wondered just how long he'll be able to endure this suffering. To be miserable by himself. To be trapped in his own dangerous territory.

He asked for a sign in the stillness of the morning hue. A sign to tell him if loving BoA would lead him anywhere so he knows just when to give up.

If he should give up...

And true enough, he'll have his answers today. Because today, will be another turning point of his life.

-

'Follow Yunho to Japan.'

BoA closed her eyes to everything and remembered Ara's face as she said those words. BoA clearly saw the sadness in her bestfriend's eyes as she was letting go of Yunho but she meant it more than anything.

It wasn't easy, but Ara was sincere with her wishes.

And although it made BoA incredibly afraid, she knew that she can't keep ignoring her true feelings anymore.

So I guess this is how loving someone feels like...

She shivered by just the thought of it because BoA, in her mid twenties, single since forever, was actually looking forward to dating her bestfriend.

BoA felt so uncomfortable that she kept on shifting on her seat. She couldn't quite determine if she was dreading this reunion or not but one thing was for sure, she wouldn't disappoint Ara after what she's done for her happiness.



It would've been a quick and steady flight to Japan if only she wasn't as nervous.  Her heart has been erratic since last night, barely giving her time to rest. As her mind wandered, she realized that thinking about the unknown future was easier. She could just imagine how perfect everything will be for the both of them and not worry about the certainty it holds.

Compared to the present she's living right now, anything could happen and the worst part about it, everything will be inevitably beyond her control and she'll just have to go with the flow.

The very thought was scary.

'Maybe this was a bad idea. Maybe I should've just waited for his return. Maybe...' She stopped rambling as she was reminded that her bestfriend had to give up everything just for this moment.

The rest of the flight was emotionally torturous for BoA  so as soon as she reached Narita airport, she felt rather proud of herself for not breaking down halfway and still going through with meeting up with Yunho.

It's funny because she actually even rehearsed what she wanted to tell him. That she was finally prepared to cross the line with him... And although it made her incredibly upset that Yunho made everything so difficult for her the past months, she's willing to forget them. Because she has already decided that she will give a part of herself to him. That she is his. That she's no longer living just for herself but also for him and their happiness.
 

She was wearing a hat and a face mask over her face as she walked her way through the hallway, carrying a tiny shoulder bag. She was lucky that because her trip to Japan was such an unexpected event, she was saved from a lot of paparazzi. If she's lucky, a picture or two would probably be circulated by now but then, that would be it. Her manager can easily take care of it if it poses any problems. She's been blessed with a great Rep.

Anyway, her biggest concern right now was meeting Yunho. For right now, everything can wait except him.

BoA walked stealthily outside the airport, careful not to get spotted by anybody, towards the parking lot where a man in casual clothes was already waiting for her. Ara had set up everything that BoA felt so apologetic for all the trouble.

'It's 9:36am. Right now, Mr. Jung's  staying at the usual hotel. He doesn't have any schedule today except for his reservation at his favorite restaurant. His flight back home would be around 4:45 this afternoon.' The man said in a low voice. BoA felt her cheeks burn. This man obviously knows the purpose of her visit and that made her a bit uncomfortable. She was lucky she had her mask on to conceal it somehow. Still, she was thankful that he was very detailed with his report.

Yunho's the type to go through the day following a strict schedule. If everything goes well, she'll be able to get to the hotel just in time before he checks out.

Shifting her eyes away from the man accompanying him, BoA merely nodded her head in acknowledgement as she entered the front seat of the car.

At the corner of her eyes, BoA saw a sudden perplexed expression from her companion. 'Do you mind if I sit in the front? I just... Sitting alone at the back isn't too appealing for me right now...' She explained with a sigh.

Although a bit reluctant, the man gave a short smile as he gestured for her to go in before he went to the driver's side himself.

Immediately after, the two were on their way to the hotel. It was about a 45 minute car ride from the airport but she was sure it will feel like a passing bullet because of how uneasy she was feeling inside.

Amidst everything, she found a short moment just to think of a happy thought. It struck her so suddenly that this was definitely the point where the two of them can finally be together. When she can claim to the world that yes, she's in love with her bestfriend.

She soon started to wonder if what she's feeling was almost unexpected.

She wasn't sure...

But all those years they've been friends, all those times they've spent together, the ups and downs in both of their careers and the comfort knowing that they'll always be by each other's side... It's just so hard not to think that their relationship was headed towards this direction in the end.

She felt her cheeks burn again. This time, she didn't care.

Halfway through their trip, she heard her phone ringing. Startled, she fished her phone out of her purse and checked who it was before answering.

'Yes, manager unnie?' She squeaked and almost dropped her phone when the lady on the other end started screaming. BoA's companion was sensible enough to pull over giving BoA a moment to talk clearly.

'Kwon BoA! How can you not tell me you'll be in Japan in some unofficial business trip?!' The seething voice made BoA nervous. She knew she was in so much trouble.

'Unnie, I'm so sorry but this is an unexpected trip. I promise that I'll be back first thing in the morning.' BoA's voice went rushing. All the happy thoughts evaporated in a snap of a finger.

'BoA...' Her manager breathed on the other line, 'you've been in the industry for more than a decade. Of all people, you should know better than to disappear without telling me! You know that!'

Guilt feeling was soon taking over BoA's nerves and her resolve was starting to crumble before her.

'What if something even more serious happens and I'm not there to control the situation?! Not that this isn't SOP as it is already but... You do understand me, right?!'

'I know. But this is something real important...'

'Is it so important that you're willing to risk your own career for this? BoA, what you just did--'

'Unnie,' BoA interjected abruptly. 'I know the consequences of this more than anybody. But I'm going to meet someone. Someone special. I just can't take another second to miss this chance.'

Both ends were silent for a long minute until her manager let out a long sigh of defeat. She knew that BoA's the type of person who would pursue anything she wanted with or without the approval of the people around her. There's no use raising an argument with this lady when she's this determined.

'Are you really meeting that man?'

BoA bit her lip as a blush colored her cheeks. 'Yes...' She answered honestly, forgetting to ask how her manager even knew about her plans. It was probably Ara who gave her a heads up anyway. She was the only one who knew about this trip.

'Alright,' her manager breathed in resignation as she turned her chair away from the monitor screen bearing a picture of BoA and a man standing by the car. It was a far shot of the two, a bit blurry, but unmistakably that of BoA. The older woman rubbed her temples and soon, her feature started to relax. 'I knew this was bound to happen sooner or later anyway,' she confessed, 'but BoA, just promise me one thing will you?' BoA nodded silently on the other line, just waiting for her manager's next words. 'When you come back in Korea, make sure that you return happy.'

And with that, the line went dead.

BoA lowered her arm and rested both her hands on her lap after shutting down her phone. She could feel tears b at the corner of her eyes and she fought hard not to start crying. But in her heart, she was really moved by everybody's kindness and support. This time, it was time for her to stir her own destiny.

Sooner than she had expected, they arrived at the hotel where Yunho was checked in. By the time, it was already around pass 10:30am. Too early for a confession, she thought, but a bit too late to admitting it.

'I'll park the car and wait at the lobby. Would that be alright?' BoA nodded absentmindedly and got out of the car in a hurry.

'He'll be in the 32nd floor, room 3233,' she mumbled as she walked hurriedly towards the elevator. Everything around her seemed to be in slow motion when she was on the edge, trying to catch the slipping time in her hands.

When she heard the familiar ding of the elevator, she hopped right in and pushed the button to the 32nd floor. The ride going up took forever.

She raised her head and counted the levels they've passed by until, the doors finally opened. She stepped out quickly and expertly scanned the floor plan before turning to her left. It wasn't a long walk when she saw his room number intricately engraved at his door.

All doubts in her heart was washed away. She dare say she was even excited to be meeting him personally bearing a good news. 'Ha! What good news... I'll prolly be the bearer of his bad luck!' BoA chuckled at her own humor before composing herself.

Bracing herself, she knocked on the door and waited restlessly for Yunho to welcome her. She smoothed her hair and fixed her collar. In her mind, she needed to look absolutely stunning. So stunning that he's left with awe.

Never mind that her clothes looked too boring and she had black circles around her eyes. Heck, she's not even wearing any make up besides her pink lip gloss coz the weather made her lips chap. But at least she's wearing the bracelet he gave her a while back.

Looking at it, she wondered how she could've missed the small details that spelled Yunho's feelings for her.



A minute passed and there's still no answer from the door. She knocked again and waited anxiously outside. Barely a minute after, she was about to knock again when the door finally swung open, behind was an older lady with used towels in her arms instead.

'May I help you young miss?' The lady asked, raising her eyebrow as she examined the guest in front of her.  The shock in BoA's eyes was too evident. She suddenly couldn't speak and answer the simple question thrown at her. 'Are you BoA...? Are you, by any chance visiting our celebrity guest?'

'Yes! No... I m-mean...' She stammered and then stopped midway. Nothing was going right.

'He checked out early in the morning. This room is now unoccupied,' the lady offered, looking apologetic and curious.

BoA's face fell down in disappointment. This wasn't supposed to be happening when she's prepared so much for this moment.

Managing a short smile, she thanked the older lady as she made her way back to the lobby. Her legs found their way towards an empty couch where she fell right in, exhausted. The rush of adrenaline wore off and now she felt like an empty shell.

'Yunho, where are you...?'
 

'BoA, where are you...?'

Yunho dialed BoA's number again but it's shooting him straight into voice mail. That's not what he needed to hear right now when he just took an emergency flight to get back to Korea. It was a call of desperation that he had to use  his influence as a celebrity (which he hated) just to expedite his plans of seeing BoA.

Frustrated, he started calling Changmin instead. 'Hyung! You're back in Korea?'

Yunho ignored his questions. 'Where is BoA?'

'BoA noona? I don't know... We're not exactly...' He murmured as he felt a cold chill run down his spine. He was yet to taste BoA's wrath after what he did to push her buttons last night. 'Anyway, did you call her manager yet?'

Yunho smacked his forehead. 'Not yet. Okay bye!'

As soon as he's off the line with Changmin, he dialed BoA's manager's number in a flash. 'Noona, where's BoA?' he asked but just then, a wave of screaming girls had drowned the sound from his mobile phone. He strained to hear over his phone but it was difficult. 'Noona, noona, are you at the studio?' He barely heard a muffled yes as he squeezed his way out towards the exit. 'I'll just swing by, 30 minutes tops.'

Arriving safe inside the car, he asked the driver to drop him off at the studio instead. It actually took him just 20 minutes to get to his destination.

Now cruising the all too familiar building, he finally got a hold of the person who can best link him to BoA. Yunho opened the door cautiously to scan the room. He only saw one person inside, staring at the computer monitor very intently. He suddenly felt conflicted whether to go in and break her concentration or to just leave and solve the mystery himself.

'Yunho is that you?' Before he could decide, he was already caught. He let out a boyish smile as he entered the room.

'Sorry if I'm being a bother.'

The manager turned her chair around to look at him directly. 'No, it's fine. A distraction would be perfect right now,' she answered tersely, massaging her temples. 'Why don't you take a seat while I go get us a cup of tea?' she offered but didn't wait for his answer anymore before leaving her desk.

As instructed, Yunho walked towards the couch and sat there comfortably. He had a small smile on his face, projecting a happy tune. After everything he's willing to risk just for BoA, he's sure that the Gods would be just as generous.

He's going to right everything between him and BoA. It was an awful start for the two but at least this time, he can be honest with himself and upfront with BoA.

Feeling restless as he waited by himself, he started scanning the room filled with a lot of posters from BoA's album discography. There was a huge collection and it almost filled all four corners of the room.  He looked around feeling so proud of her achievements until his eye level fell on the computer screen. He stood up from his seat absentmindedly and approached the manager's desk.

He scrutinized the picture closely. There were a series of photos taken of BoA entering a car together with a man he did not recognize. It wasn't hard to figure out that it was a recent picture, too. When it comes to BoA, his hunch is almost always right and right now, his hunch was telling him something he rather not admit to himself.

He looked at the specific picture one more time. A stabbing pain was slowly creeping through his body and an impending headache on its way.  There were more photos but he didn't have to bother and see all of them to get the sign that he was asking for.

Because he realized that there's no need to look for BoA and prove anything to her.






Because in the end, he would have to eventually let her go... Forever.

*

Author's Notes:

Can somebody just give them their happy ending already?!

Ah. Oh. That's right, I'm the one doing this to them. Oh gawd, I'm just as curious as to how these two will mend their relationship back together. You're not the only one frustrated. HAHA! Anyway, updating because something YunBoA happened. Well not really. more like BoA shinki if anything but Shout It Out and Tree was Released today so yay!

Moving on, thank you everyone for reading!