“Sorry I’m late.”

I tossed the giraffe stuffed animal aside, frowning at Ryeowook. He held up a bag of take-out, standing on the threshold of his bedroom. Scooting over on the bed, I reached out for the food. “Took you long enough. Changmin left. What were you doing?” I opened the brown paper bag, pulling out one of the white containers. “It’s been like an hour.”

“There was a mix up with the order,” Ryeowook explained vaguely, opening one of the smaller containers and dipping in with his chopsticks. “They took a while to get it together.”

Well, whatever, the food had come and he was back home. Changmin was wrong. Thank god I told him to get out. I was tired of his ing about Ryeowook’s secret destiny. After spending some time with him, shouldn’t it have become clear that the kid was far from the next evil mastermind? Changmin was crazy and a dumb- at that.

“You chose the same university as me,” I remarked. The radio played quietly in the background, humming a tune that I barely recognized.

He nodded absently, chewing his food.

Why was I making small talk? We never did this. But…it felt different that night. It was finally that time of the year where spring was warm enough to sleep with the windows open. Crickets chirped and birds cooed to accompany whatever artist sang through the stereo.

“Ryeowook,” I waited for him to turn his head and then I kissed him. It wasn’t playful or bruising like I would’ve normally done it. I…wanted to enjoy the moment. Thinking about exactly how his lips felt against mine was enough to make my heart thud against rib cage. My entire body ached to do it again and again just so I could feel that sensation of floating forever.

“Kyuhyun?” he breathed.

When I looked into his eyes, they weren’t vacant. In fact, he looked shocked and maybe dazed. The way my name sounded on his tongue told me that he had felt it too. I couldn’t figure out what it was, but that moment had to be once in a lifetime.

I pushed the take-out bag to the floor, setting my own container down on the bedside table. Plucking the one in his hand out, I put it aside as well. Clasping our hands, I pulled him to his feet, turning up the radio as we passed it.

“What are you doing?” Ryeowook stuttered, giving me the cutest confused face.

I placed my hand at the small of his back, leaning forward until our foreheads were touching ever-so softly. “Last time at that party, I didn’t get to dance with you.”

“Is this how you would’ve danced with me?”

“No,” I admitted, grinning and pressing our lips together again. I made a satisfied noise, practically melting at how good it was to kiss him like that. “But one of my favorite singers is on right now. He doesn’t do dance songs.”

On cue, Sung Si Kyung’s godly voice rattled the stereo.

I inhaled quietly, singing along softly.

Helps erase the torment of my past
The blinding sunlight and when I shade my eyes
My fingertips seem bathed in red…
 

Ryeowook joined in, taking the next lines with that sweet, high voice of his. The anguish of the song spilled through and at that moment, I thought nothing of it.

The circle I secretly drew
On a number on the calendar is suddenly tomorrow
I set out my favorite clothes
Thinking of what your expression may be

I spun him around, pulling him close once more. Tilting down, I peered into his lifted eyes, smiling as our voices met and melted into one.

Pure as the sea, your child like
Eyes and your smile
Keep on showing up,

Closing my eyes, I slid my hands up, caressing the slopes of his face. Ryeowook hooked his fingers around my forearms, holding himself steady.

In my eyes the beam of light
I give a sigh then laugh

He sang higher and louder than me then, words resonating like a worry I wished he held for me.

At the end of a difficult day
Who will take care of you?
Who will love you?
 

My heart was beating erratically and it was if as I could combust any second. That’s how much heat thrummed through me. Resolve bit after resolve bit chipped away until I found myself crushing our lips together.

I am out of breath up to my chin
The wind blows above my head
I run with all my strength
This may be the last gift

“K-Kyuhyun…,” he gasped.

I gazed back at him, hushing quietly when I pushed him back onto the bed. There was a light bounce from hitting the blankets.

I give to you

“You’re not alone,” I murmured. I don’t know why I felt like it was necessary to say that, but I did it anyway. “Believe me.”

“I know,” Ryeowook swallowed hard, face colored with embarrassment.

My tears flow, no, they are just the
Flowing sweat drops from my face

It wasn’t just a quick . It wasn’t even a moment of weakness.

I just…wanted to be with him. I didn’t want to regret spending another night together thinking that I had wasted a chance. The moment it struck me how right it felt to kiss Ryeowook was the same moment I realized high school was ending.

There was no more time for screwing around. Excuses and second chances didn’t exist anymore.

“Let me hold you,” I spoke against his throat, hands pressed against his bare waist.

“…okay,” Ryeowook’s fingers dug into my shoulders.

I kissed him with a laugh, enveloping his slender body in my arms.

I never want to be apart.

Just let this one person be mine.

I don’t care about the rest of them.

Just him.

Just Ryeowook is enough.

I will act nonchalant like before
And give a smiling goodbye
My darling love, I’m sorry

Sunlight streamed through the window. Birds sang in the early morning and I rolled over, shutting my eyes tighter. Groaning, I felt around the bed, shooting upright when there was nothing there.

“Ryeowook?” I called, looking around deliriously. A warm breeze rushed over my skin, reminding me clearly of what had happened that night. Keeping the blanket around my hips, I slid over the edge of the bed, looking around for some indication of where he might have gone.

Far across the street I see you
You keep on looking at you feet, are you tired?
With all my strength, I run
This may be the last greeting
That I give to you

The closet was missing his duffel bag and backpack. Clothes were gone and the drawers emptied. His stash of emergency cash had disappeared and his bag of toiletries was nowhere to be found.

Several school-issued textbooks rested in a pile on the desk. Next to them was his student I.D. card and used notebooks, along with his laptop and cell phone.

My tears flow, no, they are just the
Flowing sweat drops from my face

And then I found it.

It wasn’t a note. Not really, at least.

A small piece of paper rested on top of the radio. Ryeowook’s clear, angular writing offered four lines: the last four lines of our song.

“You can’t be sad when I am not here,
Like a dummy,
You will be okay, live well,
Good bye.”