I walked into the dorm, lifeless. I couldn't even bring myself to speak anymore.

" A-Alexis?"

I looked up and saw Eunhyuk still in tears. I ignored him and went to my room. Sat on my bed and just stared blankly at the wall. My door suddenly opened. It was Leeteuk. He sat beside me and put his arms around me.

" Everything is going to be okay... These things just happen..." he said in a weak voice.

" No. They don't. There is always a reason to it. His was good enough to leave me behind."

He looked at me surprised. Tears fell down his cheeks.

" Leeteuk, I'd like to be alone." I said.

His grip loosened and he slowly went out the door.

 My head fell on the pillow. And I cried myself to sleep.

***

I woke up in the morning with heavy eyes and a head ache.I got out of bed, got dressed quickly and ran out the door. I decided to meet Eric at the cafe downtown.

***

I sat at the same table where Eric first told me my contract was sold. This nostalgia, took over me.

As usual he was late and he came running in.

" Sorry I'm-"

" Just sit down and listen to me." I said in a cold voice.

He sat down, his eyes widened.

" I need to get my mind off of things. I want you to book me every possible show, concert, tour, anything. I want you to book me for at least 2 months. I don't care anymore."

" W-Wait... Are you serious? But don't you need some days off?" he said in a shaky voice.

" I told you I don't care. I want to get my mind off of him. With a tight schedule I won't even be able to think."

" Alright then... I'll let you know about your schedule tomorrow. I guess for now... You should make use of the time you have left." he said.

" Believe me." I started. " I've got plans tonight. This is going to be my last chance in trying to bring him back... And I'm taking it."

***

I went back home and before I knew it, it was already evening.

I walked towards the front door. Kyuhyun noticed me and put his hand on my shoulder.

" Where do you think you're going?" he asked.

" I'm going to at least try and bring him back."  I replied.

" And how do you suppose you'll do that?" he smirked.

" I'm going to see the president."

***

I walked in the corridors of S.M. Entertainment, with a quick pace I was heading towards the President's office. I had the most serious look on my face that I ever had in my whole life. I could hear the Super Junior members walking behind, trying to catch up to me without creating much noise. I felt someone grab me by the shoulder, but I did not stop walking. I quickly glanced to the side and it was Leeteuk, almost panting.

" You're not serious about this right?", he said.

I glared at him and said : " I lost too many people in my life. I'm not going to just stand and watch anymore!" I quickened my pace, almost running down the corridor.

" Think about this! You can't do anything about this matter on your own!" I heard Heechul say, catching up to me.

 " It's not like you can stop me!" I said, dashing in the hallway.

Their reaction was slow, and they couldn't catch up to me. I stopped in front of the big double entry door, took a deep breath and knocked on the door.

The Super Junior members all came to a halt, with a few of them stumbling and bumping into each other, and they looked at me with very worried eyes. On the other side of the door, I could hear someone say: " Come in." It was the President's voice.

I opened the door, noticing that the guys' gazes never left me and closed the door, leaving a small gap. I looked back and noticed all of their eyes stacked up on one another and looking at me cautiously.

" Ah, hello Alexis! What brings you  here?" he said, sitting on a big chair, smiling at me.

I had my serious face on. Almost too serious.

" I'm here to discuss something with you. It's very important." I said, never leaving eye contact with him.

He looked at me with a confused look. " What's wrong? Did something happen?" he said, worried.

" Not to me. To someone else." I said slowly walking closer towards his desk. He leaned his back against his chair and looked at me.

" Alright. Let's hear it." he said, with a little smirk on his face.

" It's about Hankyung." I said, with a little bit of a sad look on my face.

He then burst out in laughter. Was this really funny to him? After a long moment, he finally came back to reality.

" You know, you're not the first person to tell me this.", he let out a small giggle, " I mean, there were many letters, fans protesting, but I must say, you're the first person from any entertainment company to confront me face to face about this." He had a despising look on his face.

" I'll get to the point then. I demand that you make a public and written apology towards Hankyung and I want you to renew his contract." I said.

" Haha, what good will that do?" he said staring at me.

" Well I'm sure he'd come back." I said.

"You do realise that he filed the lawsuit, right?" he said.

" I understand but-"

" In other words I don't think he'll be coming back." he said, almost glaring at me.

" I'm sure he will! Super Junior is his family! He won't leave them behind..." I said with a worried voice.

He then started laughing again. I started losing my patience.

" What's so funny about this?" I said, feeling uneasy.

" Do you really think that bothers me? It was his decision to leave, not mine." he said.

" But he left because of you! You... You were killing him inside! He came down with a disease because of you! How could you do that?"

" I take no responsibility for what happened, and neither should you. He was simply weak." He said with a satisfied look on his face.

" Weak? You say that he is weak? Weak means you give up easily. Weak is for someone who can't continue... I say he's the strongest person I've ever met! He... After all that you put him up to... He continued till the end! Because of his courage he ended up hurting himself. All because of you!"

He looked at me with widened eyes, and a smirk slowly came onto his face.

" And this is still funny to you? You're a monster with no heart for doing this! " I said, horrified.

" You really think that that's the case? What about you? You're not exactly the person everyone thinks you are. Believe me, they've told me all about you. You're the most heartless person out there. You haven't visited your parents ever since you came to the entertainment world because you hated them for what they did to you. You never got close to anyone, you brushed them off as if they were dust. You ignored everyone's words and you're confidence overflowed in your skills. On stage, on shows, you always showed this happy and loving side. Everyone that I talked with told me that you're masquerade was sickening. And in reality you were a sad, cold and lonely little girl. You're talent is nothing to laugh at, don't get me wrong, but your hope is a joke. You hope for the impossible, that's why you're so weak."

What he said might have been true. But I had a reason for distancing myself form people. It might have been true that I did feel hatred towards my parents for putting me in this situation but I never used it as a reason for not trying to see them at least once, it's all a question of courage. I didn't want anyone to think that I was weak so I pretended to be strong and happy on stage, but once the curtain was closed, I went back to being unhappy. I never meant for people to think of me like that , it's just the way I am.

I fell to my knees in defeat. Not knowing what else to say.

" Please..." I begged.

" Why do you keep insisting for him to come back? You realise that you're the one that's trying to drag him back here, right? Have you ever taken into consideration his own feelings?"

" Then... Let's make a deal." I finally said.

" What kind?"

" You bring Hankyung back, apologize for what you have done and in return..."

" Yes?"

" I'll resign."

His jaw dropped and he looked at me with a surprised look.

" You're worth much more than him, Alexis. There is no way that will happen. Plus, you're worth billions to this company, how much are you worth to Hankyung?"

Tears fell down my cheeks.  I looked up at him in disappointment, got up and headed towards the door.

Without anything else to say, I opened the door and noticed all of the members looking at me. I looked down at the floor and made my way through everyone. I slowly walked down the corridor, trying to fight back any more tears, and I headed towards the exit. Donghae ran behind me and grabbed my hand.

" I tried."

" Were you serious about resigning?" he asked tightening his grip on my hand.

I nodded. He let go of my hand and I headed back to the dorm, along with the rest of Super Junior.

I really did try, but in the end, I still lost him.