" Alrighty then! We'll start shooting now!" the director shouted.

Siwon came closer to me and sat on the couch.

" Quite a surprise huh?" he said.

" You knew that I was doing this too?" I asked, suspicious.

" Of course I knew! What idiot wouldn't even know his own co-star?"

I was about to point at myself.

" Alright then Siwon, Alexis..." the director said, getting closer to both of us. " The story is that you two are lovers and with the perfume Siwon goes crazy over you! I want you two to act out those kinds of scenes."

Siwon? Crazy over me? Yikes...

Siwon smiled at the director and when he turned away he looked worried. As if he was afraid to even touch me...

" Alright then Siwon, grab her by the waist, pull her in and plant a juicy kiss on her lips that the whole world will be talking about!" the director said, a little bit too enthusiastically.

" W-Wait no one said anything about us k-kissing!" I screamed.

" It's okay. It's only between friends, right?" Siwon said.

" Action!" the director shouted.

 We both got up and Siwon's expression suddenly changed into this firing charismatic look. He wrapped his arm around my waist, pulled me so close that we were touching each other's bodies.

" Good Alexis! I like that frightful look on your face! Nice job!" I heard the producer say.

That frightful look was no acting on my part. It was quite scary and my heart was beating faster and faster. He touched my cheek with the back of his hand and slowly slid it down my neck. He slowly started leaning onto me, I tried to stay calm. He leaned closer and closer to me and then... kissed my forehead. What the... ?

" WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?!?!?!" the director screamed.

We both looked at him with our eyes widened. I was simply stunned.

" Do it again! This time kiss the lips! The lips!" the director shouted and went back to the camera.

Siwon let out a big sigh and the camera started rolling again. He pulled me in the same way as before, he leaned in but this time it felt as if he was determined to kiss me.

" Whatever happens, don't move." he whispered in my ear.

He then gently pushed me onto the couch. He sat beside me, put his hands right next to my head, leaned in and kissed me on the side of my mouth as close as possible to give the illusion that he was actually kissing me. To give it a better feel, I closed my eyes and put my arms around his neck.

" CUT!!!" the producer screamed.

Siwon quickly got up from the couch. I sat back up and rubbed the corner of my mouth. At least it wasn't a real kiss...

" That was beautiful!" the producer said. " The commercial should be out by the end of next week. Thanks for your hard work!" he said and left.

" T-Thanks for not really kissing me." I said to Siwon, a little bit embarrassed.

" It's okay, I knew you didn't really want to do it... I mean it's the first time this has happened but... At least we came thru." he said and smiled.

I was lucky to have a friend like Siwon, he was like the big brother I never had...

" I'll drive you back home." he said.

" But what about Eric-"

" He told me to bring you back."

" Oh ok thank you."

We went to the dressing room to change back into our normal clothes and we finally left the studio.

***

After a long day, I was happy to come back home. I entered the dorm but noticed that all of the lights were off. I walked into every room but no one was home. I dropped my bag in my room and walked back towards the elevator, went up to the 12th floor and knocked on the other dorm's door. No one answered, so I tried turning the door knob and the door opened. I tip toed inside and noticed that the lights were off but I saw that there were shadows in the living room. I flipped the lights on and saw that everyone was staring blankly on the floor. Leeteuk, Eunhyuk and Ryeowook were all in tears. My heart skipped a beat.

" What happened?" I asked.

Kyuhyun looked up at me as if he gave up hope.

" It's Hankyung." he said in a weak voice.

Eunhyuk and Ryeowook burst out into more tears

" What about Hankyung?' I asked worried.

" H-He... Left." Leeteuk finally said.

I looked at them confused. " Left?"

Shindong got up and walked towards me.

" He... He filed a lawsuit against S.M. for what happened to him. He left the hospital after 3 hours of examination and immediately went to court. We knew about it but we kept it hidden from you. In the end, he won, and he left us."

I fell to my knees, paralyzed. He left?

" I don't believe you!" I screamed. It felt as if a thousand arrows pierced my heart. I ran towards his bedroom and violently opened the door. His room was empty.

" This can't be... THIS CAN'T BE TRUE!!!" I screamed.

I ran out of the dorm, crying. I ran in the streets and into the park, went through a bush and ended up in the secret garden. I walked weakly towards the bridge and collapsed on it. I cried my heart out. I couldn't believe it. This was exactly why I didn't like to get close to anyone. It's because once I was attached to them I wouldn't be able to let go. If they left, I would never be able to stop my tears from falling. The feeling of losing someone, it's the most horrible thing that could ever happen to you. One minute your having fun with them, laughing, and then they just disappear. The desire to see them torments you for the rest of your life. The desire to hear their voice, and to hear their laugh again, it all slowly devours you. But, just like that, without saying a word, they just leave.

I know this, because I felt the same way when I left my parents.

" He promised..." I whimpered. " He promised..."

I cried. I felt as if he let me down. He promised to stay, but in the end he was lying. He was lying all along.

I heard footsteps and lift my head.

Hankyung was in front of me standing.

" What are you doing here?" he asked.

" You promised me... That you would never leave. You promised me this on this very spot." I said in a weak voice.

" Listen, Alexis, I never meant to hurt you. It's... It's better if I leave -"

" SHUT UP!!!" I screamed.

He looked at me, shocked.

" Have you ever thought about what the others would think?! Do you think that they will be happier?! DO YOU?!? Do you even know what it feels like to be left all alone with no one to turn to?"

He stayed quiet. He had the saddest look I ever saw on his face  He just turned his back towards me and walked towards the way out.

" I'm sorry. I'm moving back to China to pursue my career there. Thank you for everything." he said and left.

" Please... Stay..." I cried.

Pain suddenly struck my heart. I fell to the ground. I've never experienced such pain. It felt as if someone was slowly carving my heart out.

Maybe... The reason why I felt so much pain and agony, was because I fell in love with him.