Perhaps it was a year ago, perhaps more. He isn't too sure, it feels very long a time ago.

Long time ago, he was standing up there, dancing until his limbs were sore, singing until he could sing no more, sweating dripping down onto the floor. His brothers were beside him, doing the same routine, being careful of the mic attatched to their clothes and not knocking into the others at the same time looking at cameras.

Long time ago, he wanted the love and attention, money and fame, and everything that came with it. That was until he tripped and broke his knee. That wasn't included in what he saw, but he didn't see many, so the fall broke more than a knee.

Long time ago, rest would be nice. A day on the beach, a day in the pool, a day in the bathtub, a day of doing absolutely nothing. Those were rare and precious, and he took every second into count, because who knows when will next time come. Maybe never. A day was all they wanted, they hardly got it.

He looks up at him, dancing with all his might like he always does. He smiles, eyes wrinkling at the sides and pushing collected tears out. He realizes this and quicky wipes it away with he back of his hand. He knows he's been seen, perhaps it is better that he is seen. He hopes that he sees it as well.

The song is nearing to it's end, they both know because they've sang it together countless times. A spin, a pose and finish. Fireworks shoot, they bow and exit the stage. He ponders whether or not to go see him, he decides against it because it will distract him and pull him down. He knows, because he's been there.

He straightens himself and shifts to a more comfortable position in his chair, posing like he is paying attention.

He silently wonders when next time will be.

It was a year ago. He remembers clearly. Maybe it is because he counts the days he's been gone, he counts the days of his heartbreaks.

A year ago, he was with his brothers on stage. He kept a lookout - a special lookout - for him, because he knew what the heavens had in plan. He wanted to prevent it, he wanted the candle to burn itself out instead of someone else burning the flame and leave the remaining wax in its place. His mic didn't work, he'd pass his; he didn't understand, he'll explain slowly in a slang only they know.

A year ago, the heavens decided to put the plan into action. He did try to stop it, he really did. There was nothing he could no, no slang he could say and explain to him so that he would understand that maybe, perhaps, they could change this together. Something else was blocking his eyes, something that isn't him.

A year ago, he looked forward to face cameras, all the attention on him, flashes going on and off, gifts shoved into his hands, people screaming his name just to hear him speak. He despises them now, those stupid flashes that goes into his eyes. He wants to look for him, damn it. Perhaps he is in there somewhere, maybe he is looking at him right now. Professionalism isn't a word that exists in his dictionary.

The camera faces him, he smiles and gazes deeply into it like he always does during the end of the song. He used to clap a low-five with him then, they both knew because they've done it together countless times. A spin, pose, finish. Fireworks shoot, people clap, fans shriek and scream his name, he only looks around in the crowd for a familiar face. He knows he's there.

He then bows with his brothers and leaves the stage. He turns back at the last second to maybe catch a glimpse, but all he sees are flashes.

Perhaps he was blinded by flashes that time.

okay so i literally have no idea what is this

i just watched a vid on yt that says hankyung cried during an sj perf specifically heechul's part and boom this appears

also because hankyung and yunjae gives me too much feels

the top is supposedly hankyung's thoughts while the bottom is heechuls

i don't know man they're just so

so

ugh

heechul i hate you

no really i really hate you i love lady heehee

oh look word count this is 762 words including this a/n yeah.