Jamie groans, massaging her head a bit. Looking at the wall clock, she let out a sigh as she realize that she had been reading essay after an essay for nearly 3 hours, no wonder the back of her head was thrumming a little. She clearly needs a break. Besides, she still have a day to finish checking her students messy attempts on the English essay she had asked from them, a couple hours of break would be good.

Going for a cold drink in the fridge she fished out her phone from where she had buried it under piles of papers and was slightly surprised that Siwon had not even sent her a message. He was busy with work, she reasoned, what with the new drama he's shooting, and there's that movie he was casted into.

Saint Siwon, have you eaten? Don't starve yourself again, okay? Heechul would be out to get my if you as much as lose a pound! :) Stay safe!...

She has half the mind to put a heart emoticon but then again she was never the cheesy type so she sends the message as it was, hoping Siwon would send a message back even if she's resigned that he would be too busy to answer and she should just go back to her work.

A minute passes and Siwon has not replied so Jamie sighed and went to sit in her desk once again. However, she couldn't concentrate anymore; there's just so much of incorrect grammar she could take and she decided to postpone checking the rest of the essays, remembering that she needed to go grocery shopping anyways and it would be a good distraction at the moment.

The grocery she frequents with Siwon was not far and she was browsing through the racks in no time, thinking of what to cook that night. She was nearly finished when she felt her phone vibrate; a call. Siwon.

"Where are you?" came Siwon's voice and she could easily see the furrow on his thick brows.

"Shopping. Are you home?" she asked with, a little amused at the pout in Siwon's tone.

"Yeah. I just got out from a meeting. You didn't tell me you're going shopping today. Where are you exactly?"

"It was a spur of a moment thing. I'm nearly finished anyways; I'll be back in no time."

"I'll fetch you."

"Aren't you tired? You should just rest; catch up with a few hours of sleep. Don't worry about me, okay?"

"I want to worry about you." Siwon replied, and it made Jamie's heart flutter.

With a sigh, which was mostly a smile anyways, Jamie told Siwon where she was and she didn't have to wait for long until Siwon's car was in sight. Siwon got out of the car, his face covered under a large sunglasses and a cap.

Jamie walked over to meet him halfway since she was concerned about paparazzi lurking around or following Siwon; they didn't need exposure and the sooner Siwon got back to the car, the better.

Siwon immediately caught sight of her and even under the hood of his cap, she could see that dimpled smile that always manage to make her heart stutter. He took the bags from her and helped her get into the car after tossing the said bags in the backseat.

"How was your day, Mrs. Choi?" Siwon asked as he settled on the driver's seat.

Jamie couldn't help but smile. "Mrs. Choi? Really?"

"What? You are Mrs. Choi!" Siwon replied with a mocked pout. "Or have you done something behind my back to fool our parents about the marriage?"

"Hey! How can you say that!?" Jamie sputtered and landed a smack on Siwon's arm as the latter drives their way out of the parking lot.

"You made a deal with your parents about marrying me. You're not exactly the type to take it all in a stride." Siwon teased, laughing.

Jamie pinched Siwon, "I am not as bad as you think!"

"I know, I know. I was just teasing." Siwon grinned, reaching for Jamie's hand and lacing their fingers as they stop on a red light. "How was your day? I didn't expect you to be out of the house today. You were about lots of papers to check.

"I went out for a break. I was near to having nosebleed with all the grammatical error I was reading." Jamie let out a sigh. "How was your day? You're back early."

Siwon let go of Jamie's hand as the light turns green, the smile on his face lingering. "I was given the rest of the day off. I got that role in the movie I was telling you about so the manager let me off early today to celebrate. I was thinking of celebrating with you, a dinner somewhere. Is it okay?"

Jamie was ecstatic, congratulating Siwon. "How about we celebrate it with the rest of the guys, instead? I'll cook!" she volunteered.

"Are you sure? I mean, you're going to cook for an entire army of men."

"Hmm... oh! I know. We could go to mom's restaurant. I'm pretty sure I can have a private room reserved for the lot of you. She'd be happy to congratulate you too since she's a really big fan of yours."

"Are you sure? Isn't it a little too much to ask from your mom?"

"Hey, they decided to marry us without our knowledge! This is nothing compared to that." Jamie scoffed playfully.

Siwon was silent for a moment and Jamie wondered if she had said something wrong.

"Do you... do you regret... accepting the deal our parents made?" Siwon asked, his face schooled into a blank expression, although there was that apprehensive look in his eyes that Jamie could see even if he tries to hide them.

Jamie bit her lip, not really knowing how to answer Siwon's question. They were living with each other comfortably and had even came to like the other more than friends, certainly more than two people bound to other by the whims of their parents. But all of it, all of this, is not really their choice. Having these feelings for Siwon, she knows she doesn’t regret having him by her side, but of given the chance, she would have done it some other way. Because no matter how she sees it, it wasn't exactly their choice. But then again…

With an inaudible sigh, she lifted herself a little off her seat and gave Siwon a kiss on the cheek, feeling him stiffen a little in surprise. She gave him a hug, careful not to impede his arms from driving, "Does that really matter? I'm here, you're here. And we're happy. Whatever happened in the past, does it really matter?"

Siwon let his free hand rub Jamie's arm which was around his neck as she settled her head on his shoulder. "I guess it doesn't. Not really."

To say that the meal was noisy is an understatement. Not when there are 10 loud guys who are squabbling over the pettiest of things, shouting all over the place just so they could be heard over the equally loud conversation their friends are making even in the closed area of the private room. Jamie doubts that the sound-proof walls are keeping the noise inside, not with the raised brows the restaurant staffs were giving them through the glass doors.

“Are you regretting this now?” Siwon whispers (he’s actually speaking in well-modulated voice to be heard) into Jamie’s ear through the uproar.

Jamie looked around the long table that looked like it had been emptied by starved wild animals after being stampeded into; Heechul and Kangin were terrorizing the younger ones namely Ryeowook and Henry, Donghae and Eunhyuk were doing some drinking contest with suspicious varieties of alcoholic beverages, Kyuhyun, Yesung and Shindong egging them on, the others plainly shouting here and there as they made random conversations, or at least try to. It’s plain chaos.

“Uh… do you want me to be honest?” Jamie answers, raising her voice to be heard too.

Siwon laughs. “I told you we should just have dinner on our own.”

“Of course you would. You want to monopolize her!” Henry huffs as he finally managed to get away from Heechul and Kangin, feeling somewhat no remorse of leaving Ryeowook alone with them.

“I don’t think you should have a problem with that!” Siwon grins.

“I do when you refuse to save from the wolves.” Henry all but pouts, sidling closer to Jamie when Heechul finally gave Ryeowook a break; it only means the older will be looking for another soul to torture.

“Last time I checked, EXO got that as a comeback concept, not Heechul-hyung or Kangin-hyung.”

“Not the point, hyung.” Henry gulps when Heechul came closer.

“Did I hear my name?” Heechul smirks.

“No.” the youngest squeaks.

“Liar. Everybody talks about me when I’m around.”

Jamie didn’t even bother holding her laughter, “So conceited, my gosh. You’re so shameless.”

“Shut, you. You owe me two kids because I’m the most awesome matchmaker and the reason why the two of you are even together today. And by the end of the year, I want my compensation!”

Jamie promptly choked on her saliva as Siwon’s face went beet red. Trust Heechul to make the most mundane comment into a suggestive one.

“Uh… I don’t think I wanted to hear that.” Henry whines

“Nobody did.” Siwon asserted, pouting at Heechul and giving Jamie a concerned and apologetic look. “Stop saying things like that, hyung!”

“What? You’re married, and married people get to have children. Unless you want to spend the rest of your marriage in celibacy! Which is stupid! And don’t even tell me you do because as I’ve said, you owe me children.” Heechul mocks.

“Talking about things like these is not appropriate while in public. And not to mention we shouldn’t be talking about these things with you, hyung!” Siwon is visibly cringing at every word Heechul was spouting.

“Nonsense! I practically got you together! I’m like… your fairy-godmother or something!”

“I’m outta here!” Henry wails and tries to get up, only to be yanked down by Heechul.

“Stay, kid.” Heechul directed his eyes back on Siwon and Jamie. “Are you even planning on making your marriage public? Please don’t tell me you’re staying as an eligible bachelor to the rest of the world forever for working status. Because that is just so unfair to both of you. And not to mention stupid.”

Well…

They didn’t even realize that the whole room’s attention were partially on them, the guys curious too as to what the next step Siwon and Jamie have for their relationship. Heechul might be obnoxious at times, and a loudmouth who sticks his nose in everybody’s business if he wants to, but he means well especially when it comes to people he cares for the most.

“I…” Jamie looks at Siwon only to finds him looking at her too. She could see that he was just as lost as she was.

They were saved by the knock on the glass doors separating them from the rest of the restaurant. And in came a beautiful face that had been a little familiar to Jamie in the past few days; Kang Hyemin.

“Hyemin-ssi!” Heechul greeted warmly, leaving the table to usher the girl inside and let her sit on the seat he abandoned. “It’s so nice of you to drop by. I heard you’re back for a project.”

Kang Hyemin is really beautiful, to say the least. She laughs daintily behind her hand, eyes crinkling into pretty slits that could rival Tiffany’s eye-smile, and Jamie likes Tiffany’s smile the best at that. Her voice is a soft and pretty as she is and Jamie briefly wonders how and why this woman had been in Siwon’s past instead of his present. Well, Jamie’s one of the reasons but still…

 “Didn’t Siwon tell you? We are working on that new movie. Well, we both just got the parts earlier today but still. I’d think he still tell you everything before anyone else, Heenim-ssi.” Hyemin smiles teasingly.

Heechul turns at Siwon with glare. “You didn’t tell me.”

“I told you I got that part of the movie, hyung, you just ignored me for the alcohol.” Siwon shrugged.

“I see you guys are still close as ever.” Hyemin observes with a fond smile, looking around the table. “Though I miss a few faces here. And a new one…?” she gave Jamie a curios look.

Heechul’s words played themselves inside Jamie’s head over and over again. When are they going to tell the public about Mrs. Choi Siwon? They can’t keep it forever. But are they ready to do so?

Now is only going to be one of those times when they will be forced to say something about what’s really going on about her and Siwon. What will Siwon tell his ex-girlfriend? That Jamie is just a friend? Or would he tell her that Jamie’s his wife? But that would be a shock and Jamie doesn’t think they are ready yet. It’s one thing to have Siwon’s closest friends to know, and even his company. But it’s a different ting altogether to tell someone outside of that. Not to mention that this is a person who used to hold Siwon’s heart.

“She’s my girlfriend.” Siwon answers, hand sliding into Jamie’s under the table and giving it a gentle squeeze.

Well… that could work too.

The smile on Hyemin’s pretty lips falters, but nobody would have noticed if they weren’t looking. Too bad Jamie was. Or was it?

 But the blinding smile was back again in fraction of a second. “Really? I didn’t know. Not even heard of it.”

“Well, we try to keep it low.” Siwon grins and gave Jamie’s hand another squeeze.

“Oh, how sweet. But aren’t you guys laying low enough now? I mean you’re on different level of stardom now; almost enough that your fans won’t go giving your girlfriends murder threats at any given opportunity.”

“Well. We can never be sure. We still get grabbed now and again on airports.” Heechul asserted, sensing something shift in the air. “But hey, we aren’t here to dwell about those things! We’re here to celebrate because your movie is going to be the movie of the year!”

Thanks to Heechul’s energy, coupled by the rest of the guys’ enthusiasm, the celebration was back to the fullest in an instant.

Jamie, on the other hand, kept to her seat, Henry giving her company since the youngest was finally free from Heechul’s clutches. She didn’t mind being the boring one because she wasn’t the one to like parties, or drinks of any sort, for that matter.

“How does it feel?” Henry asks as he swats away the drink Kyuhyun was handing him.

“Huh? How does what feel?” she asked, giving Kyuhyun a pointed look when the latter gave her the drink instead, smiling when Kyuhyun rolled his eyes and slips away to bother someone else.

The smirk in Henry’s lips is teasing but there was genuine curiosity and fondness in his eyes. “How does it feel to finally be out of the closet?”

“I’m not gay.”

Henry laughs at this. “You know what I mean, Jamie. Stop kidding around.”

“I know, I know.” She let herself think about how she was feeling at the moment, looking at Siwon who was being hounded by the other members, he looked happy. And the smile on his lips gives her a content feeling, something warm and light inside her. “I… I’m happy. It’s a small feat, considering what we are facing, but I’m still feeling so happy I think I could do the most stupid thing in the world and still feel unashamed.”

“Gosh! People in love are so sappy! I’m going to get cavities just by looking at you.”

“Shut up, Henry! Go get drunk with Kyuhyun or something!” Jamie all but pushed Henry towards where the rest were happily getting themselves drunk.

She watched for a while, thinking how she can do this thing with Siwon, endure being a secret, even with just a handful of times like this where the two of them can actually be who they really are to each other. It seems like a lifetime since that day she received that phone call that had practically put her life in a different track. Right now, she actually kind of thankful for her parents’ scheming minds, in some way that is.

“So… we haven’t really properly introduced ourselves.” A sweet voice rift Jamie out of her reverie. “My name is Kang Hyemin.”

Jamie tilted her head into a bow, feeling a little intimidated. It wasn’t every day you meet such a stunning woman, not to mention that said woman is a well-known actress in Asia and your husband’s ex-girlfriend; intimidation is the least of the feelings raging inside her right now.

“I’m Ch—uh, Song Jamie. It’s very nice to meet you.” She held out her hand out of habit since she practically spent half her life in America, feeling sheepish when Hyemin gave it an amused look.

Hyemin reached out and shook Jamie’s hand anyways. “So. How did you and Siwonnie met? And how long have you been together exactly? With SJ’s status, it’s a wonder how the paparazzi have not gotten a whiff of you yet.”

“Well, we’re practically going out of our way to avoid giving anything off.”

“Oh, right, right. Pity. I’d think Siwon would be happier if he can date in public and all. It’s always frustrating how people like us are never comfortable making our relationship public. You see it all over the news, couple breaking up because of luck of time for each other or the pressure.”

Oh… that too. Jamie had been trying to cast those kinds of thoughts away since she knows it would only make their life even more complicated than it already is. But she can’t help it now that Hyemin had pointed it out vehemently.

Hyemin pats Jamie on the back, another one of those sweet smiles directed at the latter. “I’ll see you around, Jamie-ssi. Or at least try to. Since you are all going secretive with this relationship of yours, I’m betting I won’t see you hanging out at work with Siwonnie and all. I bet we can spend some girly time together if you can, but since it’s a little too impractical at the moment, I guess I need to wait ‘til that time comes.”

But how long will it take?

The party ended up a little after midnight, the lot of them promptly short of being kicked out of Jamie’s own mom’s restaurant. And maybe they should have expected as much, but it was still a little surprising to see several cameras directed at them once they were out the front door. The media never sleeps after all.

Siwon subtly put himself in front of Jamie, covering her from the inquiring lenses and eyes as discretely as possible. Jamie never imagined what it would be like once they finally get the news about them out, but seeing the shark-like attitude of the media when it comes to the personal lives of idols, she’s actually kind of scared of the time they come out to the public. How do idols do it? They must be part saints if they have to go through this every given moment and not get annoyed at the very least.

“Siwon-ssi! Hyemin-ssi! We heard about the new movie project! Aren’t you both starring on it?”

“Are you here together to celebrate?”

“You came from the same company! Are you two close even before?”

“Did you plan to celebrate with the rest of SJ together?”

“You two are together, what does this mean?”

“Are you dating perhaps?”

Jamie is being pushed and pulled this way and that and she’s tired, but she couldn’t help but to be tuned into the mindless questions the media people were hurling at the lots of them. She had been told many times that it would be chaotic like this and she should just turn a deaf ear to all of it for people are always eager to hear news, be it be true or not entirely.

 But with that last question, she couldn’t help but want to blurt out how Siwon cannot be dating Hyemin because he was Jamie’s husband! It sounds childish in many ways, but still.

“Uh, haha. That’s a funny thing.” Siwon smiles, “But we were here with my friends to get together. We haven’t done that in a while. And please support our upcoming movie.” He said, dismissal in his voice as he tugged Jamie behind him.

With the lot of them being ushered to several cars, no one notices the other woman on the group; Kang Hyemin was there after all. But still, how are they going to do this without selling themselves? If Siwon and Jamie got into the same car then what would the media say? They’ll on every paper in the country the next day!

Heechul seemed to have seen the panic in Jamie’s eyes. He promptly tug Jamie from Siwon, taking care to laugh obnoxiously as he leads her to his car, “Come on, Jamie. I’ll get you home. I need to talk to you with that outfit I told you to make me!”

Jamie frowns as Heechul started babbling about leather and studs and the best design ever, that she doesn’t have inkling about, and stuck her into his car, calling for Henry simultaneously because they came together anyways since Henry doesn’t have a driver’s license in Korea.

The media were too engrossed with Siwon and Hyemin that they didn’t pay too much attention to her. She was safe in Heechul’s car in no time, Henry sliding inside beside the driver’s seat as Heechul got in too.

“That was a little too close, wasn’t it?” Henry smiles.

“Yeah. It was a little too crazy for me. Thanks, Heechul.”

“Sure. Now you owe me a bunch of children.” Heechul smirks.

Jamie groans but she was not up to bickering with Heechul again, not when it was way past her bedtime and Siwon was still out there, probably getting drilled about the whys and hows he was with Hyemin in one of Seoul’s better-off restaurants in the middle of the night. Even if the rest of SJ was there.

Heechul pulled out of where he parked his car and drove off in the general direction of Siwon’s and Jamie’s apartment. Siwon was calling her five minutes into the ride and she sighs in relief, they hang up after a couple of minutes of Siwon’s apologies and promises to make it up to her.

“I hope he makes it up to you with children.” Heechul says.

“Why are you always about that?!” Jamie all but shrieks from the backseat.

“Fine! Well, then I hope he makes it up to you by thinking about the exact time when the both of you will actually go out in public already so we don’t have to panic like that again and pull up stupid acts in front of the paparazzi!”

“You know it’s not that easy.” Henry pointed out.

“Of course I do! All I’m saying is the time when Siwon has to choose between love and work is inevitable.”

“Or he can have both.” Jamie sighs. “We just have to wait longer until that time.”

“Trust me, honey. The world is a judgmental and it will never grant wishes and hopes but its own. Sure, there’s a huge possibility that people will accept you wholeheartedly, but it will still make a huge blow into Siwon’s career once the public knows this whole arrangement. So you better think of how to do it before it all blows up and get messy!”

Jamie hates to admit, and frankly she thinks Heechul’s is being enough for three men, but he’s right. They need to think about this very carefully. Siwon’s career is not the only thing that is on the line here, so are their hearts.

“Here’s the latest news on your favorite celebrities. Super Junior’s Choi Siwon was caught enjoying a little party with his band members and leading lady on his new movie last night. The SJ idol was warm and cozy with his co-star, Kang Hyemin, who turned out to be not only a sunbae from his agency, but also a really close friend. There were even rumors and speculations before they both debuted that they were secretly dating. Of course it was not confirmed since SME has strict rules about dating labelmates. Even so, old rumors are one again coming to life. And on related news, Choi Siwon was allegedly seen picking up a girl at from a small grocery store. Footages immediately circled the internet. This, however, is unconfirmed yet since Choi Siwon’s management has not confirmed that it was him.”

The pen on Jamie’s hand slipped before the news even ended. She knows something was up ever since this morning when she woke up. It was nagging feeling at the back of her mind. Now she understands that dreadful gut feeling.

What to do now? What was she to do?

Fumbling, she took her phone and dialed Siwon’s number, something she knows now by heart. She couldn’t get through. And that only made her even more anxious. Is everything going to be okay with Siwon and his management? They have not actually talked about what to do once this type of things happen.

She dialed again but she still can’t get through. But before she could even have the chance to grow grey hair, her phone buzzed with an incoming call. It wasn’t Siwon, though.

“Hello, Jamie-ssi. Its Siwon’s manager. We need to talk.”

Those simple words, why do they make her feel like suffocating?

A/n: i'm terribly sorry for taking so long in updating,, but good news(?)...

i'm going to update as fast as possible because my main goal before the 1 year anniversary of me being here in AFF is to finish all of the fics i posted when i joined... wah,... it's almost been a year!!! oh my!!!!!

but yeah... so presumably before the 2nd week of november, this fic will be completed.. please anticipate! just one more twist and it's all done!!!