I decided to go to my aunt’s home to visit my mom. I can't believe it’s almost 3 months I haven’t been seeing here because she keeps dodging me and this time I’m really worried about her. So I asked Dara to accompany me there.

As I arrived in my aunt’s house, I saw mom reading on the lazy chair. She looked fine though that’s why I’m relieved.

Then I asked Dara to come in and mom was… she looked upset. She wasn’t really welcome about Dara’s existence. I believe her head is still planted by those bad records Dara had. This is all dad’s fault.

I told her she is not the old her anymore she is going to change for the better, for me. But mom wouldn't listen to me and she kept insisting that it’s bad decision and idea to stay with her and live with her.

Mom told me not to do anything that can damage my life. It is impossible for me to tell mom about my current life, about how I live my life recently with Dara.

I’m ing take drugs. I realized that it is a bad decision but I can’t help it. The more I take it, the more I feel good, the more I feel joy. My dad is taking care of his new baby and new , so what can I do?

“So what did you and your mom talked about?” Dara asked.

“Something you might not be interested in.”

“Did she ask you to leave me?”

“That’s not news at all.”

Dara starred at me and I just kept looking away from her. I’ve had this thought in my head. It just came to my mind after I visited my mom.

“I can tell there’s something bothering you right now.” She said to me.

“Let’s stop.”

“Stop what?”

“Stop… this, stop taking drugs.”

She smirked, “Wow… I still remember how you were so determined to take those.”

“I was frustrated, but now I think it’s better for us to stop. You said you want to change for me. You said… you love me. So don’t you want to live a normal life? Without drugs, without being wild and hated teenagers? I want to have a normal life with you.”

“You mean normal by having boring life, like reading newspaper in the morning and watch soap opera at night and go to the park for bike riding?”

“Yes. And it’s not boring at all. It’s what people do. It’s normal. And It’s good.”

Dara smiled suddenly and climbed toward me, pushing me against the headboard of the bed. She chuckled for no reason and kissed me gently.

“You really want to stop?”

“Yeah. Didn’t you say you want to change? I’m helping you change.”

She giggled and kissed me again. “Okay… let’s try.”

I broke the kiss and pushed her away lightly, “You serious?”

“You want me to change my mind?”

I hugged her quickly excited by the happiness, now I can fully believe that she really is in love with me. She loves me. She wants to change for me. Now time for her to really prove it and I’m so hipped about it.

***

I keep telling myself, ‘I can do this.’ But everything I thought doesn’t go really well with reality. , it’s even only months I’ve been using the drugs and I already feel like I’m gonna die without it. I can’t imagine how Dara’s feeling. We gave away all drug stock we got and we decided to make ourselves clean.

But like I said, it isn’t that easy.

Dara stumbled herself onto the bed sheet. Her eyeballs are getting smaller and she’s been sweating like that for hour. Her face is so pale I’m afraid she’s gonna die soon. She kept , in pain and desperation and need of drugs. I held her hand as myself also started feeling the same pain as her.

I felt cold and I snuggled onto her I thought it could make us feel more warmth. She kept shaking and trembling. She looks like she’s gonna explode and then she looked at me with those watery eyes, “Are you okay?” she asked me instead.

I nodded lightly. “Are you?” I asked hardly.

She closed her eyes tightly, “Do I look ing okay?” she murmured and started yelling and again.

“You can do this. It’s gonna be okay. I’m sure it’s better than going to rehab.” I said, not really knowing if what I’m saying is true or not but I just try my best to calm her down.

She grunted, “I’m gonna puke my throat will explode!” she rushed into the bathroom and started throwing up. I pulled up the bed sheet and covered myself because it’s