Sehun’s POV

“I’ve always had my eyes on one girl. Even when I dated others, I could only think about her. I could only love her. She was the only one who could break my heart and that someone is…” I said to her in a calm voice before I paused near the end of my sentence.

“Sehun, stop. Let’s not talk about this right now” Aemi said, as she was about to leave.

I grabbed her arm and pulled her back in front of me. She seemed a bit startled at my boldness for I never told her what to do or forcefully made her do anything. I always let her do anything she wished but this time, it was different. She dismissed a subject that I could no longer ignore.

“You aren’t going to drop the matter, are you?” she asked.

“When are you going to stop denying that you have feelings for me? You know how I feel. I don’t need to tell you for you to know Aemi. I can’t do this anymore. Not after what happened”

“I love you but I’m not in love with you Sehun”

As if that didn’t rip my heart into a million little pieces, I stood without movement. I don’t believe a single word of it.

“You say one thing but your actions tell me something else. What are you afraid of? I really don’t understand you,” I whispered trying to hide the hurt that was audible in my voice.

“Can we just go back to the way things were before? Why are you being so stubborn lately?” Aemi said with a hint of irritation in her voice.

“I just want an honest answer Aemi. Stop beating around the bush! It’s driving me crazy. I know you. I can feel that you feel the same way as I do. Why ARE you being so stubborn?” I asked as I slightly raised my voice.

Aemi’s POV

I could see that he was reaching his boiling point. It’s been years since we’ve had this conversation. Last time, I was able to avoid it because I was dating our school’s quarterback Nathaniel Vanderbilt but now I had no idea how to dismiss the subject. “It’s getting late Sehun. You should go home” I dismissed him as I walked away.

“Is that it?” Sehun asked.

“That’s my final answer,” I answered confidently.

I walked back into the house and leaned against the entrance door. The house was dark and everyone was asleep. Or so I thought… I saw a figure approaching me and I stiffened.

“Don’t you think you treated him a little unfairly?” Jihyun asked me.

“What are you doing up so late?” I muttered as I looked away.

“I couldn’t sleep…”

“He’s loved you all these years. Don’t you think you should’ve given him a more concrete answer? How can you be like that?”

 “Ah why does it sound like it was you that I hurt? I thought Sehun didn’t mean anything to you anymore”

I seemed to have touched on a subject that was from so long ago. Jihyun paused and there was a long silence before she said anything. No one understood me and for the first time, not even Sehun did. There was a reason for this. There was a reason for everything.

“He’s still a childhood friend if anything. I might not know you like he does but I know that my sister is not cold hearted. I know somewhere in your heart, he’s touched a part of you inside. Am I wrong?”

“The moment I tell him… is the moment I’m under Minho’s control. I don’t wish to be like you. I don’t want to be caged in and have no freedom to even choose who I want to be with. I… least want to be like you,” I whispered as I tried to explain exactly how I felt.

There was no answer. And I continued.

“And the most important thing… he’s too important to me. I don’t want to wreck our friendship if the relationship doesn’t go well. I know I’m selfish… but I don’t want to lose anyone anymore. I only have Sehun left and I don’t think I can manage without him”

“You still have Minho and me. You were never alone. You isolated yourself from the family. It doesn’t have to be this way Aemi” Jihyun said as she touched my hand.

I pulled away from her touch almost instantly. I stared at her infuriated. As if she didn’t know why I pulled myself out of the equation! As if she didn’t know why I felt this way!

“I don’t have a father and I definitely don’t have a sister like you. I don’t have any family here. I just have Sehun. Don’t try to sweet talk me into feeling any different” I hissed at her as I walked past her.

“You will never listen to my side of the story, will you?” she asked in a low whisper barely audible.

I stopped in my tracks. Why does she keep asking me that?!? What more am I missing? She killed mom. Her and Minho. End of the story. Period. My blood boiled when Jihyun played the pathetic I didn’t do anything card. It angered me more than Minho feigning care for me. I walked upstairs back to my room and dropped my body onto my bed. The blue envelope I received was lying in front of me. I picked it up again and read through its contents. I ripped the plane ticket into pieces and threw it into the air angrily.

“You can’t make me do anything,” I said under my breath as I finally fell asleep.

Jihyun’s POV

I grabbed my beige AllSaints Spitalfields trench coat and walked towards the front gate. Kai was waiting in his silver Ferrari as I opened the car door and seated myself. I noticed he looked a bit more tired than usual. He had slight bags under his eyes and his hair was as usual slightly disheveled. He wore a plain gray Rugby hoodie and black Lucky Brand skinny jeans with his favorite go to black converses. He drove away immediately without much of a greeting and he turned the music on louder. The long silence somewhat made me feel emptier than my conversation with Aemi.

“Where do you want to go?” he asked me finally breaking the silence.

“…I don’t know” I mumbled a little embarrassed that I asked him to pick me up but I had no destination.

“Let’s get a late night snack,” he suggested.

“There are no places opened during this time of the night…” I replied a little confused.

He didn’t say much after that and he parked in front of what seemed to look like street food. I looked at him confused as he unbuckled his seatbelt and headed outside. I soon followed suit as he sat in one of the cheap plastic stools. I stared at him bewildered as he ordered a plate of the red stuff.

“When did you ever like street food?” I asked him in shock as he took a bite.

“Try it. It’s good” he ignored me as he placed it in my mouth.

I chewed what seemed to be like rice cakes in my mouth in disgust. I didn’t like it one bit. I wanted to spit it out but I didn’t want to be rude to the Ahjumma who was cooking it. I noticed that she stared at Kai and I with a smile. We met eyes and I smiled politely back.

I didn’t eat much after but Kai devoured the entire plate and also ordered some chicken feet to go. When Kai handed the owner a hundred dollar bill, the Ahjumma declined.

“It’s okay. It’s on the house,” the Ahjumma said with a smile.

Kai looked at her puzzlingly and insisted on her accepting the money.

“The last time you two came, you paid me more than ten plates worth of dukbokki. It wouldn’t be right to accept your money again” she smiled.

For the first time since I knew Kai, he smiled. Though it was a small smile, I’ve never seen him genuinely smile at anyone. I suddenly grew envious of the Ahjumma. Why does he smile to a complete stranger when he hasn’t for me after all these years? I thought to myself. Kai bowed politely before taking the food and we both headed back to the car. As he drove me back home silently, I wanted to ask him about his sudden change in behavior. Before I could speak, he broke the silence once again.

“It seemed like you didn’t like the food very much. I’m sorry I should’ve asked you what you wanted first before making such a rash decision” he said with his classic monotone voice.

“You went to eat there before?” I asked curiously.

“Yeah”

“You’ve always been picky with food. You don’t like food that is messy, you make sure that it is clean and healthy, you don’t like to eat too much carbs and you don’t like sugary foods. But why the sudden change in taste?” I questioned him.

“I know. Aha Aemi made me try it. It’s really good” he slightly chuckled as he said her name.

I sat in silence for a bit. Why did the mention of Aemi suddenly seem to brighten his face up? Am I imagining things? I looked out of the window trying to sort out how I felt. No. I’m probably just imagining things. Kai was teaching Aemi during that time. It made sense. It made sense that they’d go out and get something to eat. I shrugged the other thoughts out of my head. Now it was my turn to turn the music up. 

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Comments:

@ SHINeeTaekeyshawol 

I'll try to update as often as I can. I have two AP classes that takes up most of my time. I will update again probably tmr for you! Thank you for your comment! smiles =)