So...hi

PLEASE DON'T KILL ME

It's been 8 full months since my last update, on the dot too lol OMFG I'M SO SORRY GUYS. But actually I"ve had this knawing feeling of guilt for the past few months because jfc cmon jade. just update the damn story. I have been really overwhelmed with school and extracurriculars and I really cannot explain how bad I feel right now but I'm alive and i'm seriously, really sorry.

I'm here now though...heh omfg please forgive me D:

I have an update here now. I was going to post a chapter of me just apologizing with my heart and soul but then I'd feel even worse for giving the illuison of heY A NEW CHAPTER nope just the author ranting about her lack of updating sob I'M SO SORRY

If you guys are still reading this story/supporting it after 8 friggin months thank you so, so, so, so much. I can't explain it. I love you guys so much and I really appreciate the fact that I still get new sub notifications and even story comments. I really love you guys. This update isn't too long nor is it the best update but I'm going to try hard to bring a few updates this month, maybe even a few this week if I have the time. Please comment, tell me that you're still alive so that I can know not all of us died like I did? I'm really sorry abou this, but please enjoy this update and I promise there'll be more coming up soon <3 

We sit in silence occasionally interrupted by quiet sobs and small whimpers, Kai mumbling incoherent words here and there. His crying hasn’t slowed and he’s only tightened his grip on me, squeezing the living daylights out of whatever light is left within me at the moment. I can’t do anything but just sit next to him and let him release the stress and frustrations he’s obviously packed up for who knows how long now.

Five minutes pass and the soft padding of footsteps sounds from outside the closed door. I stiffen, assuming Kai will as well and pull himself together however he doesn’t register the movement. I sigh as Lay peeks through the door, his eyes scanning the room.

“Guys, we’re about to – Oh my god,” he cuts off after spotting us in the shadows of the bottom bunk. His face drops, his hand falling off the doorknob.  “Kai, what- are you okay?” He comes towards us, looking between my brother and I.

I shake my head slightly, mouthing the word ‘umma.’ Lay’s mouth forms an ‘o’ and he sits on the other side of Kai, patting his back. Kai shuts his eyes tightly, tears trickling down his nose and off his cheeks onto my shoulder.

“Jongin,” Lay says softly, calling for his attention. Kai opens his blurred eyes, a swollen tear at the corner of his eye. “I know it’s hard and you’re a hell of a fighter for keeping yourself composed these past months without your mother. Honestly, any other guy here would have been sobbing rivers if they had gone through what you are yet here you are, only showing any signs of being upset right now and away from all of us. You’re really a strong one, Jongin,” Lay pats Kai’s knees, and Kai’s eyes follow the movement of Lay’s hands.

“Having to deal with your mother passing away is a horrible thing to have to go through but look at you,” Lay ruffles his hair, “You’ve smiled and laughed so much since finding out but have kept your tears to yourself. You have so much control, man. I would have balled up in the middle of the living room and freaked out all day long for who knows how long.”

“None of us, well, except Eunji I guess, can understand what you’re going through but we all want to help you if you ever need anyone.” He looks at me, smiles and takes my hand and Kai’s hand in his, swinging them lightly. “You both have all eleven of us in case you ever need someone to be there for you guys. We can’t relate to you with this but we really love you both and never want to see you hurting by yourself.”

Kai lets out a shaky breath followed by a small smile. He rubs his eyes and sits up next to me. He stretches out his arms and yanks Lay in for a tight hug, mumbling a small “Thanks hyung,” and ignoring Lay’s request to be able to breathe.

Kai obliges and lets go of Lay in the moment the door bursts open with Suho rushing in, his phone pressed to his ear and a smile stretching from ear to ear.

“Guys, SM, or, Lee Soo Man, he, one sec –” He breaks off his broken sentences as he listens carefully into his phone before bouncing slightly in his step. A few “uh huh”’s follow and soon he’s covering the phone so he can shout, “WE NEED TO GO TO SM RIGHT NOW?!”

Lay is just asking why when Suho bounds out of the room, screaming along the way to get the other guys back home and get our shoes on. I look at Kai and he rubs his eyes again, smiling a happier smile. “I think he has good news.”

After Suho makes many multiple frantic calls in which either Sehun or Lay intercept the phone in order to properly relay Suho’s original message, all twelve guys are back and we leave for the building, walking rather than taking a car. Having been such late notice, it’s easier and more efficient.

Although we had to wait a total of twenty minutes for all eight guys to reappear from the store with only half their intended purchases, I still haven’t found out what’s supposedly happening at SM today. Suho seems to be having a happy attack, Kai’s staying quiet (though I don’t think he knows either), and Sehun and Lay are as lost as I am.

“What’s going on?” I ask Kris, catching up to his fast pace. He looks at me and winks, a smug smile on his face. “You’ll see. It’s good news, I mean. Nothing to worry about.”

I wait for him to specify any other details but he refrains from doing so, walking a bit faster despite me calling after him to tell me what’s going to happen. I hear Luhan’s ringing laugh behind me and slow down until we’re walking side by side.

“Luhan, what’s happening at SM? Is it a variety show or something?”

He shrugs, a small twinkle in his eye. “I don’t know.”

“Yes you do?” Deer boy isn’t that great at lying.

He grins, looking straight ahead. “You can find out just as soon as the fans do.”

My jaw drops, my irritation rising ever so quickly. “What the hell- Why would I- What’s going on?!” I demand and he laughs at my reaction, clearly enjoying my growing frustration.

“Don’t worry, Eunji. It isn’t bad or anything.” Xiumin chirps from Luhan’s other side.

“So what is it?”

His innocent eyes widen and he looks at me, blinking. “Why should you get to know.”

I groan in frustration, forming fists and clenching them by my sides. Stupid cocky boys who won’t share their stupid information with me.

I give up on trying and we reach the building. I run into the building a good few minutes before they do so as not to raise suspicions with the fans. Even though there are those who now recognize me as Kai’s sister, there are also others who are highly suspicious that I am either out to kill the members or marry every single one of the fans’ precious oppas.

“Boys, Soo Man will see you now.” The receptionist alerts them and the twelve guys bow, thanking her. “Congratulations, by the way!”

They thank her once again and refuse to tell me what in the hell is going on. I look back at Kai as we walk to Soo Man’s office. He’s surrounded by Lay and Sehun, who are very conspicuously attempting to keep his mood cheerful and happy. I smile, glad to know that Lay’s word was in no way just comfort words in that moment.

We come to the door and my foot is just about to step in when my arm is yanked back and I’m facing a grinning Sehun.

“You get to wait out here,” He says pointedly, waving as he shuts the door behind himself. Rolling my eyes, I walk off, lurking in the doorways of trainee rooms for a good half hour until I spot Bae and Taeyang in the break room.

“Snoopy!” I grin, hugging him and Bae. I haven’t seen them in a while, to be honest. They haven’t changed too much however Taeyang has shaved the sides of his head, further causing him to resemble his famous counterpart.

“You look even more like apart of Big Bang now,” I laugh, playing with his miniature Mohawk. He shrinks away from my touch and Bae laughs.

“Eunji, aren’t you excited for EXO?” Bae exclaims, drinking his juice with as much excitement as possible when it comes to drinking a glass of juice. I laugh at the thought of SM, a leading entertainment company providing juice for their trainees.

I shrug, falling into a seat and sighing dramatically. “I don’t know what to be excited about. No one’s telling me.”

Taeyang’s eyes turn into moons as his smile consumes his face. “They’re having a comeback, ya dork. How could you have not heard about this?”

I sit up, staring at him. “Wait – What.”

“Bae rolls his eyes, munching on a granola bar. “You shouldn’t have tooold heeer,” He sings but Taeyang ignores him, his smile stretching if possible.

“EXO’s having a comeback. Soo Man’s supposed to show them the demo version of their comeback song sometime today and they get to meet the choreographer and everything. The song producer has to fly out tonight or something so they had to rush all of this today.”

I sink back into my seat, absorbing all this information.

So EXO’s having a comeback, after a year and two months of absolutely no material. That’s what they’ve been keeping a secret all day?

Damn those boys. They’ll be getting an earful later.

Again, thank you guys so much for still subscribing and commenting. Tell me where you've been recently, how you've been, I Just really miss talking to you guys omfg i'm so sorry ;_; Thanks for supporting after so long <3