Luhan’s POV

Rather than potatoing around all day like everyone else in the dorm, I grab Sehun and force him to go out with me. I drive us to the mall and we walk around, wearing masks to hide our faces. I refuse to wear sunglasses, though Sehun does. Even if it helps disguise us, I despise wearing sunglasses inside. Instead I slip a beanie over my head, pulling it down to cover my hair and forehead.

We go through some stores, not really looking at anything. Nothing looks appealing and there’s too much on my mind for my attention to focus on anything right now.

“I’m bored,” Sehun sighs.

“You wanna go back and sit around in the dorm?”

“Not really, but this isn’t much better.” He shoves his hands in his pockets disdainfully.

“Hm…” I search the stores for something, anything that’ll cheer up the maknae.

Video games… nah, that’s more Kai’s thing.

Candy shop… maybe. He is still a kid, anyways. As ‘cold’ as he looks, his bravado will melt in a second for sweets or chocolate.

Lingerie store… what the am I even looking at that for.

Aha!

“Wait here.” I point at a bench and he frowns. “Where are you going?”

“I’ll be back, just wait!” He sits and I speed walk towards a shop that I’m pretty sure he’ll like.

When I return, Sehun’s slumped on the bench, his eyes closed. I poke his foot with mine and his eyes slowly open. “Where’d you go-OH!” He grins when he sees the contents that my hands hold and he immediately stands up, reaching out. “Thank you Luhan hyung!” He chirps, and I hand over the drink.

Bubble tea works every time.

I hold my own drink and slurp on it, the cold liquid soothing my throat.

“Where now?” He asks, his pace picking up slightly as he enjoys the drink.

I shrug, and we eventually sit on the fountain wall that’s located in the center of the mall.

“Hey.” He pokes me. “Remember what happened here?”

I grimace and sigh. “Yeah…”

“Do you ever wonder where she is? If she remembers you?” He asks thoughtfully, not one trace of sarcasm in his voice.

Ironic he’d say that.

Should I tell him?

You know.

That she’s Eunji. And that I consistently think about whether or not she remembers me. If she thinks about it in a negative or positive light. If she remembers me but chooses to ignore her memories.

If she thinks about me.

Not like ‘thinks about me’ as in she’s in love with me after meeting me a couple days ago or something.

But the me from the past that kissed her with no consent.

Does she wonder where I am? Or if I’m near her, if I’m happy with the memory?

Whether I want to see her again?
What would she do if she realized that he’s… me?

Would she slap me?

Hug me?

Grin?

Frown?

Yell at me, accuse me of unrightfully stealing her first kiss?

She has the right too, and I wouldn’t be very surprised if she did.

It wouldn’t make sense for me to not tell Sehun, though.

He’s my best friend.

My brother.

If I can’t tell him something, then I can’t trust anyone.

“What do you think of Eunji?” I ask abruptly, not wanting to just put it out there.

Sehun looks startled, and scrunches his eyebrows. “Why?”

I shrug. “What’s your impression of her?”

Sehun looks down at his drink, mindlessly stirring the pearls around with his straw.

“She’s… weird,” He finally says, “Not like the eating food out of the dumpster kind of weird, but… she doesn’t seem to be a specific person.”

“What do you mean?”

“Like, she looks quiet and kind one second but the next, she’s daring me to cross dress and act like a stripper.” He stops, as if he’s not sure what he’s saying is accurate. “If you think about it, she’s exactly like Kai.”

“Of course,” I chuckle, “They’re twins.”

“Yeah, but usually twins have completely opposite personalities. They’re both really self-confident and they take care of themselves but they’re both unexpected.” He smirks. “She’s way more sneaky and cocky than he is, though.” He meets my eyes. “Do you think she has a heart?”

Is she not supposed to?

“Yes?”

He jabs my sides with his elbow. “Not literally, but like does she care about people?”

“Yeah.” I answer immediately.

“How can you tell?” Sehun takes a long slurp from his drink.

I shrug, not knowing how I know. “She’s not cold as a rock, you know. Didn’t she apologize profusely when… when you guys kissed?”

Sehun seems confused, not answering. He shakes his head slightly, as if trying to rid his mind of something. “Okay. But you didn’t answer my question.”

“Wh-“

“Do you think about the girl?” He asks, meeting my eyes.

Might as well tell him now.

“I know who she is.” I shift my gaze to the cup, my fingers turning it around in my grip. Though I’m not looking at Sehun, I can see the size of his eyes widen as he sits up straighter.

“Who?!” He asks, his voice urgent. He sounds like he’ll go on a hunt for her if I tell him.

It won’t take him long to find her, that’s for sure.

The name is about to slip from my lips when a figure emerges from a crowd, her gaze falling on mine.

I’m not that surprised that she’d appear at this one moment.

Doesn’t that always happen? Isn’t this an unbelievably stereotypical situation? Just as I’m about to say the name of the first girl I kissed, she appears out of nowhere.

Daehyun and Zelo are behind her, and she turns to tell them something, nodding her head towards an arcade. Daehyun lags behind as Zelo sprints into the arcade, and she gestures for him to go. He gives her a charming smile before turning to follow the hyperactive maknae into the arcade. Then her eyes land on mine again.

“Hyung, who?!” Sehun’s voice interrupts and I return my attention to him. I look back at Eunji, who’s making her way towards us. In just ten seconds maybe, she’ll be standing over us.

“She’s walking towards us.” I murmur, and focus on the drink in my hands. I watch Sehun in the corner of my eyes, his head shooting up to scan the crowd. A loud gasp emits from him and I follow his line of sight, Eunji just a few feet from us. Sehun immediately shoots his eyes somewhere else, but just before Eunji comes within reasonable hearing distance, I can hear Sehun quietly mutter, almost to himself.

“What the-“

“Uh, hi?” Eunji’s voice snaps us out of our individual thoughts, and I look up. She’s looking at us, her eyebrows slightly knitted together. She lifts her hand and waves, trying to bring our attention to her. Sehun ignores her and sips his bubble tea, his eyes focused on a smudge of dirt glued to the ground.

While Sehun acts as if she’s not there, I do the opposite, pouring all my attention on the girl in front of me. My eyes follow her every move, trying to make note of any hint of recognition that I want so badly to cross her face.

Nothing.

Sehun still has not removed his gaze from the ground, still drinking his drink as if that’s the only think that’ll keep him sane.

I guess I’m doing the talking then.

“Hi!” I smile brightly, trying to dissolve the air of awkward that refuses to walk away.

“Why are you here?” She asks, and by the look of her face, she immediately realizes the harshness that came with that question.

I shrug. “We were bored. We wanted to come here.”

She looks momentarily surprised, but she covers it up with a small smile. “Did you guys follow us?”

Now I realize why she approached us.

She thought we were stalking her on her stupid date.

As much as I don’t want her around Daehyun, I couldn’t care less about what that stupid Wonbin does with her.

Actually I do care.

I won’t admit that though, will I?

“No.” I knit my eyebrows together. “You think we’d stalk you?”

She shrugs. “Everything you guys do is unexpected.” Please tell me that’s supposed to be a double meaning. “I don’t really know what to think when I see you guys in the same place as me.”

I scan her eyes for what seems like the eighth time and nothing like surprise or knowing or recognition crosses her face.

Ugh.

Would putting my mask on make her remember me?

Better to try than not to.

I put the mask that’s hanging around my neck back on and she smirks slightly at my random action.

“Okay… well. See ya.” She gives us a suspicious look before turning around and heading towards the arcade.

“Eunji?” Sehun asks, his voice cracking. I nod, watching her leave.

“Seriously?!” He mumbles in disbelief, more of him talking to himself than asking me. I don’t respond, my eyes following her movements as she walks through the doors of the arcade. I can barely see Daehyun tackle her with a big bear hug when she enters, Zelo pulling her towards a Mario game. She’s grinning, laughing at something Daehyun says, who casually throws his arm around her.

Sehun mumbles something incoherent and I ignore it.

I focus on Eunji, my gaze not leaving every movement she makes, every action she does.

Seeing her with Daehyun is pounding on my heart.

I don’t get it.

She rolls her eyes, attempts to free herself but instead he pulls her closer to his chest, poking her nose with his finger. She makes to bite it and he flinches, and Eunji takes advantage of his distraction to flick his forehead. He laughs and goes after her, trying to tickle her.

Zelo catches her and stops her from running by holding her from behind by her shoulders, and Daehyun comes at her, Eunji holding her arms at full length, her head thrown back as she laughs. He shoots his hands out and tickles her sides, and she bends over, fending him off with one hand, the other clutching her stomach. She quickly steps out of Zelo’s grip and sprints out of the arcade, sending a quick look my way along with a grin. Seeing her grin makes me unconsciously smile, but my lips quickly pull down when I realize that she’s not grinning because she’s looking at me.

She’s grinning because she’s with Daehyun.

And for some odd, questionable reason, this pulls my heart apart, yanking away at any strings of hope, cracking it in half as I watch Daehyun and Zelo chase after her, her faint laughter fading as she sprints through the mall, away from us.

I don’t understand this.

Why is my heart reacting unnaturally when I barely know her.

The fact is that I stole her first kiss. She was mine.

But that’s all that that is.

A fact.

It doesn’t mean I should like her because of it. Or that she should like me.

Then why is my heart pounding?

Her being my first kiss is not the reason that I should react like this to a girl.

Unless…

It’s not reasonable. I can’t like her after just a few days.

My fingers involuntarily reach up and I touch my lips, remembering the moment I pressed my lips to hers in the hallway earlier this week. Her soft lips, that I forced mine upon for the second time.

They tasted like strawberries.

This shouldn’t affect me though.

But now I’m starting to suspect myself of something.

The logic I’ve been giving myself about… about kissing her is that I want her to remember me. See if she recognizes me.

But that one part of my mind, the part that always knows what’s right, the part that you choose to ignore because you don’t want to believe it, has been screaming at me from the second I pressed my lips against hers.

I made myself caress her lips with mine because I wanted her to know that I was her first kiss.

Not Daehyun.

Not Sehun.

Not anyone, but me.

I don’t want her thinking Daehyun is her first kiss.

I don’t want her to believe that a random boy from the mall was her first kiss.

I want her to know that I was her first kiss.

Not Daehyun.

I don’t want her to look back and have to ignore the fact that a stranger kissed her.

I don’t want her choosing to say that Daehyun was her first kiss.

I want credit.

I want her to say, “Luhan. Luhan was my first kiss.”

I kissed her out of jealousy more than hope.

What the hell is wrong with me.

haha you all thought they were stalking her :o just a coinc-a-dinc though :D

le poll:

i just chose the first four rookie groups that came to mind :]

See ya next chapter! c: