The morning flies by with a blur. Putting the nights terrifying dreams behind me as I get dressed, and get in the car, I’m unaware of time moving around me. Mom doesn’t try to hold a conversation. She knows my mind is elsewhere.

Suddenly I’m standing in front of the door to his room, butterflies fluttering painfully in my stomach.

“Hi,” I murmur, unable to keep the grin off my face as the large metal door locks audibly behind me. Daesung’s sitting on the floor across the large room, body tense with his head in his hand. I ignore when he doesn’t crush me suddenly in a hug, and cross the floor towards him. Finally looking up at me, he smiles without relaxing his body.

“Everything okay?” I ask, sitting beside him.

“Just a little headache,” he answers, half-cheerfully. “I missed you.”

I place my hand carefully across his forehead, and his soft, dark brown eyes lock with mine from below my fingers.

“Am I warm?” He mutters, and I smile gently, putting my hand in my lap. I can’t express how much I missed his kindness and his lovely warmth.

“Only as warm as usual.”

My answer frustrates him, and he pulls away from me with a sigh, standing up and to the side. I feel bad, as though I said something that might’ve hurt his feelings.

“Do you really not feel good?” I ask worriedly, choosing my words carefully, eyebrows pinched together. Dae doesn’t answer, but glowers at the floor. I’ve never seen him like this. I don’t think I’ve ever seen him angry…ever. It’s almost…

I stand up too, brushing my fingertips against his arm. He flinches, and I take a step back, hurt.

“I’m sorry I wasn’t here.” I whisper, and he still doesn’t say anything. I start to wonder if maybe it’s not that I left, but that I came back. Maybe…he doesn’t even want me here?

“Should I go?” I ask, voice shaking. His hands snap to fists at his side, and I can feel myself tremble.

“Yeah, go,” he hisses in a voice I don’t recognize, “go back to school, and your house, and your warm bed with your mom. Go back to forgetting that I’m here. Go back to being normal and happy without me. I’m fine here. I’m fine being the freak. I’m fine being the freakish pet that you visit sometimes and pet and touch. The too-warm, too-strong, locked up…

Monster.”

His eyes are wet and gleaming, still avoiding me. I take a step towards him, heart aching, pressing my hand to his shoulder.

“Dae…” I whisper.

“STOP TOUCHING ME” he roars suddenly, and time seems to slow down. I’m looking right into his face, which is now an inch from mine. It’s twisted in rage, and the eyes that were brown a moment ago are now a glowing yellow green, reptilian and overflowing with venomous hate. His hands pull back behind his shoulders and snap forward, pushing roughly into me.

Time snaps forward, back into regular speed, and I hit the floor, sliding and crashing into the far wall. A dull wave of pain spikes through my shoulders, and tears spring into my eyes.

All of a sudden Dae’s above me, his brown eyes twisted in worry.

“Minji?” He asks, his voice terrified and confused. But I close my eyes, tucking my head into my arm, and I hear a blaring alarm sound as I lay crumpled by the floor.

 Guards rush in through large opening doors, and one scoops me up like a child, marching me swiftly out of the room. I don’t open my eyes as I’m placed in the infirmary and I hear my mom run in amongst the chaos. It’s as if opening my eyes will mean acknowledging what really just happenened.

And I can’t.