o 3 o ;

It was a chilly, windy evening and I was out sitting on the front porch, with my two knees huddled close to my body. Every now and then, the gust of wind would brush against my skin and blow the curls around my face. I sat there and stared into the far distance, just thinking about the past events that have been happening in my life.

Either way, no matter how I see it – I was bound to lose someone. I couldn't have both and I need to make a choice sooner than later. It was relatively easier with Minhyuk, Daniel even, because I was absolutely sure of my feelings for them.

Minhyuk will always be my best friend and Daniel will always be someone from my past whom I am truly grateful for. He was the one who showed me that I was capable of caring again.

But Joonmyun...

And Woohyun...

“What are you doing out here alone?”

I lifted my eyes and saw Minhyuk walking up the steps to my house. Without being invited, he casually sat down on the empty space beside me and looked up at the same direction as I was.

We just sat there in silence for about the next five minutes or so.

“You know you can always come and talk to me about anything,” he spoke up first, turning his head to look at me. “I’m still your friend, Rong. Your bestie.”

I sighed to myself. “I just don’t know what I should do now,” I admitted. “I’m in a state of dilemma.”

Minhyuk chuckled. “That’s pretty dramatic. Come on,” he nudged me lightly. “Share with me.”

And just like those others times, I poured everything out to him. How I got to know Joonmyun, the way I treated him, how we met again after all these years, about his kindness, his insecure self and how he was supposed to get married to someone else.

Without pausing, I proceeded on to telling Minhyuk all about Woohyun. His annoying childish younger days, how I disliked him during high school, how I felt when I met him again at the restaurant, his thoughtfulness every time I visited the cafe, the way he carried me all the way home when I got terribly drunk, and how he brought me out to karaoke for me to have fun and let go of all my troubles.

By the time I was done talking about the two of them, Minhyuk was staring at me with a smile on his face. I took in a deep breath and started to say, “I’ve never felt so confused and torn in my whole life before this. It’s like, I’m forced to – “

I was interrupted by Minhyuk’s thumb gently brushing a tear off my cheek. I stopped talking as he held my face in both of his hands, and stared directly into my eyes.

“Listen to me,” he said softly. “I will tell you what I think and after that you tell me if you’re still in a state of dilemma, okay?”

I scoffed a little and sniffled back my tears. “Okay.”

“Okay,” he began quietly. “Based on what you’ve just told me, I think it’s safe to say you really like this Joonmyun a lot. He makes you feel secure, he makes you feel loved, he’s always careful with his words and actions around you because you mean that much to him. His biggest fear is you...losing you and he tries so hard not to do anything that might screw things up. He is very attentive to your wants and needs so that he can make you happy whenever you guys are out together. You can count on him that he will always be there for you.”

I nodded my head, agreeing to every single word Minhyuk was saying.

He paused for a moment, before continuing. “With Woohyun, you constantly feel overwhelmed with emotions. He challenges you beyond your limits and have you test them because he wants to bring you out of your shell. Things with him are exciting and new, and you can never know what he’s about to do next because he will keep on surprising you. With Woohyun, everything is a surprise and unexpected. He came into your life unannounced, and Rong...he can also leave like the wind.”

I wasn’t sure where Minhyuk was heading with this, because it seemed like he wasn’t done yet.

“But Rong...I’ve known you all my life and I know how reserved and guarded you can be with someone new. But the first time I saw you with Woohyun, he was carrying you and you were completely drunk in his arms. Park Chorong, you’re not the type to let loose around someone that you do not trust but you chose to do that with him. You chose to get drunk despite knowing you’re out with someone you barely know, you allowed yourself to let your guard down around him. You chose to show him your vulnerable side, your weakest moments – simply because, you trust him. Despite everything else, deep inside, you know you trust Woohyun with all your heart. And my dearest Rong, trust does not come easy to you.”

I just sat there, dumbfounded with what Minhyuk had just told me. I hadn’t realised it, but he was right. About both Joonmyun and Woohyun...he was right. And now that I could actually see things in a different light...

“Chorong...” he placed one hand on my arm tentatively. “I’m not telling you who you should choose because I think your heart has already made that choice, am I right?”