L    

Aish. Why do I keep on caring about this girl? Who is she anyway?! She doesn’t mean anything to me. So what if her name rhymes with Yeobo’s? So what if she acts like her? So what if she reminds me of her? WHO THE HELL CARES.

I do. Whenever I see her, that promise keeps on ringing on my head.

I’ll help you find the one for you. This is a sign that I’m not for you. Don’t worry, I’ll watch over you, Myungsoo.

The one for me?  You’re the one for me Baek Sumin. The only one, no one can ever replace you in my heart, yeobo. No one.

Hyung went out of their dorm with this goofy smile on his face with Sourin by the door waving, smiling. Sincerely smiling. Are they really in love? Hyung better take care of her. “Aish,” I ruffled my hair “Why do I keep caring?” I mumbled to myself. “Because you she reminds you of Sumin, pabo. Damn, why do their names sound so alike?” Hyung chuckled. “You heard me?” I asked him. “Obviously, L. How long has it been exactly?” He asked. I looked at him and asked, “How long has what been?” Hyung chuckled and ruffled my hair. “You know what I mean.” I did know. I knew he was referring to Sumin. “A year, it’s been a year, hyung.” I took a deep breath.

It's been a year since my most prized possession left me. I've been suffering for a year. I wasn't like this before. I socialized, heck, I even smiled then. But now? Smiling isn't part of my vocabulary. I've closed off all doors of my heart. No one else can make me happy, not even Infinite. No one can make me happy as much as she did. No one. 

I heard hyung sigh and say, "It's been a year, huh? It feels like she was just right with us. I can still hear her laugh sometimes. Creepy, yes. Don't you?" We both chuckled softly and I nodded. 

She has the most beautiful laugh and when she smiles- oh, when she smiles- my world just lights up like a Christmas tree. She was the best thing that ever happened to me, but now she's gone. Forever. 

"Remember when Sunggyu would crack the lamest jokes?" He asked. I smiled a bit and continued for him, "She would be the only one giggling and we would all follow because she has the cutest giggle in the world." I smiled at the memory of her suppressing her giggles because we would all for being so shallow. "And how cute she is when she just blinks when all of us are laughing and she doesn't know why." He just chuckled remembering this. We started to reminisce the best and worst moments with Sumin.

How she would wait at our doorstep when she knows we're out on a fight then runs to us when she sees us.

How she would spend the day cleaning the dorm and then scolds us on hjow reckless and untidy we aer, especially when she gets to clean our rooms and finds the most disgusting thing in the world (according to her). "Used condoms. That freaks her out the most." He laughed as he said this. "And she finds them mostly in your room. You're disgusting, hyung." I shook my head and laughed with him. She hated that. Sometimes, she would throw them at their faces in disgust. I would be there, just watching her as she gets mad. Sometimes I would be behind herwith my arms around her waist listening to her scold whoever she found a used in their room. Chuckling softly, I tried to bite back the tears that were threatening to roll down my cheeks. Get a hold of yourself, L. I hung my head low, staring at the ground. I felt hyung's hand on my back, patting it lightly. 

"Get a grip, L. It's been a year. Don't you think it's been long enough?" He told me. Long enough? I'll never get over this. Knowing that he won't get a response from me, he continued. "Stop dwelling in the past and start looking at the present. Look at what's here, now. She'll be happy for you.Look around, L. There are so much people who love you. She made me promise, Myungsoo. I have to look for that girl. I think I already found her. Open your eyes before it's too late. I won't let you win this time, Myungsoo." He gave me one last pat and went inside.

He found her? I haven't seen him with a girl. Except for the nerd. Sourin? He meant the nerd? Yeobo, she's nothing like you. How the hell do you expect me to be happy with that? She can never make me happy as much as you did, not ever. 

Why did you have to leave me? We would be so happy now. Still together, living on our own apartment, remember? I can't ask you to come back, that's just impossible. I love you, Baek Sumin. I still do, I always will. Do you think it's time? Have you found the answer to your promise? You couldve chosen better. A nerd, really? If she comes out that door in 5 minutes then I'll believe Woohyun hyung. I'll open up again, be back to the old L. Be back to being Myungsoo. Alright? 

And as if on cue, a cool breeze flew by and the door of the girls' dorm slightly opened. Weridly, my heart started pounding in my chest as I stared at the door watching it intently checking who was about to go out the door. After which felt like forever, I saw one of the older girls come out. I sighed, wondering why I'm slightly disappointed. I checked my watch, 1 minutes left. Why would she go out in two minutes? I stood up and turned around to go, but stopped when I heard a familiar voice yell,

"Unnie!" She yelled. Sourin. She's outside. Yeobo? You're creeping me out here. You're just playing with me, right? You just want me to be the old L again. No, you want me to be Myungsoo, not L. 

I slowly turned around to check if I was hallucinating or not, but she was there smiling and handing the other one a coat. She went out because the older one forgot her coat? So she is nice. I watched them as the other one waved and left. Sourin just stood there and watched her leave. The more I look the more I see your differences. 

Sumin's just an ordinary girl. She works in a café. Sourin's rich, very rich. Everything's laid out in front of her, she doesn't even need to ask. 

Sumin sings and has two left feet. Sourin, according to Dongwoo, is brilliant at ballet, she can sing, and she can play the piano. 

Sumin's an ordinary student. Sourin's a genius. Apparently, she topped the ranks and that's never happened to a newbie. 

Sumin's friendly and outgoing. Sourin's quiet and reserved. 

I stared at Sourin who's now seated on the doorstep, in deep thought, fiddling with something on her hand. She slumped and looked up. I hurriedly looked away, looking at anything but her. I glanced at her and saw that she purposely dropped what she was holding and went back inside. I walked to where she was and picked up what she dropped. A bracelet with a haert and a J charm. Who the hell is J?

I walked back to our dorm and all eyes were on me. I quickly shoved the bracelet in my pocket and sat on the couch. They were still watching me. I stared at the television and asked, "What's P.O's real name?"  I kept staring at the television feeling the shocked and weird stares as I mentioned P.O's name. 

"Why do you ask, hyung?" Sungjong asked, but I just shrugged and kept quiet as I remembered how Sourin looked while she was fiddling with the bracelet. She looked.. looked so torn. 

"Pyo Jihoon. Didn't you know that? I remember you mentioning that when we were in the hospital." Hoya answered. I ignored him and just felt the bracelet on my pocket and mumbled, 

"So he's J." 

What's your story Park Sourin? No one has a perfect life. There must be something that's not perfect. 

yay, update! really short update. I think wrote this chapter like 10 months ago lol i'm such a lazy bum. It's christmas break and I had plenty of time so I decided to update! I plan on updating often during the break, but please don't expect anything ;; i'm really lazy ya know. just wait for the updates~ 

yah, hanraemi16. YOU DEAD YET, HAH. here's your update <3 where's mine??? 

so, what did woohyun mean by "I won't let you win this time"? GASP. 

what happened to sumin? 

is L convinced with what Woohyun said?

comment your thoughts! they'll be dearly loved and appreciated. 

we'll know in the succeeding updates!~ see you guys soon! love you all~

xoxo

-invisibledork