CHAPTER 15

Wendy was having her sandwich when she heard the door open.

“Oh, oppa…” Wendy greeted to the manager

“Hi…” He greeted back looking around “Are you here alone?”

“Yeah, Joy, Seul and Yerimie went out.”

“How about Irene?”

Wendy look at her a little confused “Doesn’t she have a schedule today?”

“No, I called her last night that it was cancelled, I’ve been calling her but she’s not picking up, maybe she’s still sleeping.”

Wendy just nodded.

“Anyway, I drop by to say that the reschedule will be tomorrow, would you mind telling her?”

“Y-yeah. Of course.” Wendy answered then the manager left.

Wendy looked at the time, it was almost 3. It was 11 when the manager came, she’s been sitting at the living room for almost four hours now but there’s no sign of Irene.

“Did she go out too?” Wendy asked to herself staring at Irene’s room, and then she went inside her room.

It hasn’t been 5 minutes since she lie down, she went out of her room again then went in front of Irene’s room. She’s worried, it’s not like Irene to not answer the managers call unless she’s sleeping or busy but there’s no movement from her room ever since morning, what if she’s sick? She can’t help but worry.

She knocks lightly on the door. There was no answer. She knocks for the third time but still no answer.

She was contemplating if she’s going to come inside; She always make sure to knock or get Irene’s permission each time she’s going inside her room when they’re still dating, She’s sure as hell that she won’t barge in now especially now that they’re not dating anymore. But she was worried so in the end she reached for the door knob, it wasn’t lock. Maybe she really did go out. She thought.

She slowly pushed the door and took a peek inside when she saw Irene’s figure, she’s under the blanket but she can see her head, back facing her.

She’s sleeping, Wendy thought when she saw Irene’s figure but she’s been sleeping the whole day already.

“Irene-ssi?”

Irene told her to stop calling her unnie since they started dating so when they broke up Wendy wasn’t so sure if calling her without unnie is still appropriate but she felt awkward to call her unnie again, they dated for three years and did almost everything after all. In the end, she chose to call her Irene-ssi, which was awkward at first, it feels like they were no more than a stranger, it sounds so distant but she got used to it.

“Irene-ssi?” Wendy called again as she walks slowly to Irene, but before she could see her face.

Irene move to cover her head. “I’m sleeping.”

“I know, I’m sorry.” Wendy apologize “Are you okay?” she couldn’t help but ask noticing her voice. Something’s wrong with it, she knew, they dated for three years of course she knows that much.

“Are you sick?” She asked again when Irene didn’t answer

“I’m still sleepy.”

“But you’re already sleeping the whole day, are you sure you’re okay?” Wendy asked, voice wrapped around in concern

“Just leave me alone, okay.” Wendy was a little surprised to hear the edge on Irene’s voice. She’s clearly isn’t okay.

“Okay.” Wendy nodded, still looking at Irene’s figure with worry “I’m just outside if you need anything.”

“Just leave, please.” Irene said again.

Wendy’s POV

I went out of Irene’s room after that. I am now sitting on my bed, biting my poor nails.

She’s not sick, I could tell but what worries me more is the fact that Irene would use that tone whenever she’s mad at me in the past. Not mad, mad but I’m hurt mad, like you hurt me that’s why I’m mad at you mad.

The thing was she was okay last night, we were okay, and I was able to even and she looks like she was in a good mood when she went inside her room.

“I’m just over thinking it.” I told myself as I lie down.

It’s been a year since we broke up and I’ve been gone for two months, maybe she’s not what I used to remember her anymore. Maybe something really did happen that doesn’t concern me at all and I just happen to barge inside her room when she clearly wants to be alone.

End of POV

It’s been three days since that night, since Irene heard about what happen between Joy and Wendy. Three long suffocating days, they started preparing for their comeback, she feels like her paranoia is getting worse since that night, she would avoid being alone with Wendy or Joy or would get out of the room whenever the two are together.

They’re inside the practice room now, all five of them. Everyone’s tired but still having fun as usual, but I guess not everyone felt the same, Irene was tired and paranoid at the same time.

The four would play around just like they used to in the past but Irene can’t seem to like it and look at it with adoration now, not after what she heard that night.

Irene went out of the room as soon as they get a break, she went to the bathroom as fast as she could.

She felt betray to be honest, she and Joy had a talk, about how Joy told her that she should make everything right once Wendy gets back when in fact, for all she knows she’s laughing behind her back.

She took a deep breath and washed her face by the cold water.

She didn’t want to think about it, she doesn’t want this feeling she’s having with her member that she treated like a family but how can she stop herself from feeling this way, Yeri and Seulgi knew and they didn’t tell her. They knew that she’s waiting for Wendy like a fool and they didn’t say anything. They knew and they kept their mouth shut to her while they were secretly supporting Joy and Wendy’s relationship. How can she feel okay?

“Seul…” Wendy sits up from her bed, facing Seulgi “Can I ask you something weird?”

Seulgi put down her phone, giving her full attention to Wendy. “What is it?”

“Is Irene alright?” She asked concern “I don’t know if it’s just me but I feel like she’s avoiding me more than the usual. More than she did when we broke up to be honest”

“Oh, you notice that too.” Seulgi said “I thought it was just me who’s noticing it, I thought she was just tired so I didn’t really think much about it but yeah, she hasn’t really talk to me for the past days too.”

“What do you think happen?” More worried now

“I have no idea.” Seulgi answered “But you know unnie, she always try keep it all in so we don’t get worry.”

“I know.” Wendy said making a deep sigh.

It was one of the many things that she admires about Irene. She’d always do everything to make the four of them not worry but she hates it at the same time. When they were still dating, it always took Wendy lot of words, deafening silence, longer hugs, before Irene tells her what’s bothering her and it feels really good whenever she does at least Wendy was able to share those worries with her. Wendy could only wish that even if they’re not together anymore she hopes that Irene realizes that she could still share her worries with her.

“Okay, let’s take a break.” The choreographer said, and as soon as she did, the four girls start glancing at each other.

As usual, Irene went out.

The four girls formed a circle and talk to each other.

“Have you talked to her?” It was Seulgi

“I tried last night but she dismissed me before I could say another word.” Joy answered “You?”

“Same as you.” Seulgi answered then she looked at Yeri

“I could hear her say no from afar.” Yeri said “Wendy unnie should talk to her. Maybe it was your fault.”

“My fault?” Wendy’s brow cocked “I don’t even remember doing anything.”

“You don’t always remember anything whenever you two fight before.”

“That was in the past, okay and this is different. This is serious.”

“I am. I mean, what else could it be?” Yeri asked

“Yeri’s right.” Joy said “Maybe she’ll talk to you.”

“Why me? If you three can’t talk to her what makes you think she’ll talk to me.” Wendy said “Did you guys forget the fact that we haven’t been in talking terms since we broke up?”

“But you know her better than any of us.” Joy said “The tone of her voice, her eyes when she’s lying, you know her body language more than anyone.”

“Like literally, you know her body.” Yeri added, earning laughter from Joy and Seulgi

“Kim Yeri!” Wendy widens her eyes

“What?” Yeri asked casually “She’s your ex, why would you even get shy about it.”

“I’m not shy okay.” Wendy gritting her teeth then she turns to Joy “What have you been teaching her?”

“I didn’t teach her anything okay.” Joy said, still chuckling “And besides she’s right, you know her spiritually, emotionally, you know her inside out… literally.” Then burst out laughing again

“Okay, I’m out.” Wendy said at the three who’s now laughing wholeheartedly

“Wait, wait, wait.” Seulgi pulling her arm

“Seul, not you too.”

“No, I’m serious. If someone here could talk to her, it’s you.” Seulgi said “Not only because you two dated each other but because you have seen her in her most vulnerable state.”

“Literally.” Joy and Yeri added in unison.

The four girls start exchanging their glances as soon as they went out of the elevator. They are now at the parking lot of the company. Irene’s is walking ahead of them.

Seulgi elbowed Wendy, signaling to follow Irene

“What?” Wendy mouthed

Joy then eyed her.

“Wait.” She mouthed again

Yeri pushed her real hard causing her to stumble on her feet, earning a big silent laughter from the three.

Wendy can only grit her tooth looking at them who’s clearly having fun.

Irene seated in front.

While the four of them seated behind.

They’re still in the parking lot when realizes that she doesn’t have her phone.

“I think I forgot my phone. I’ll go get it quickly.” She stepped outside, and then she went back to the elevator.

“There you are.” She said after seeing her phone on one of the chair inside the practice room.

She was on her way towards the elevator when someone called her from behind.

“Wendy-ssi!”

Wendy stops from her tracks to look back at the person calling her. “Suho?”

“Hey, Wendy unnie just texted.” Joy said “She said something came up and won’t be able to go home with us.”

“Did she say what’s it about?” Seulgi asked

“No, she just said that we didn’t need to wait for her.”

“For all I know, it was all just an excuse so she won’t talk to Irene unnie.” Yeri whispered “That coward.”

Wendy is currently at the park not far from the company building sitting at the bench. Not really minding the cold air that’s washing over her. She was just sitting there no plan in mind, just staring at nothingness, and then her phone rang. Seulgi’s name registered, Wendy only glance at it then let it continue to ring until it ended.

“Hey, Wannie what time are you coming home? Please, call me back” Seulgi said after her call to Wendy was directed to her voice mail.

Seulgi made a concerned sighed as put down her phone on the kitchen table and took a glass of water

“Seulgi unnie, still nothing?” Joy asked

Seulgi shook her head “Still her voice mail.”

“Don’t worry, I’m sure she’s just walking around. You know how she likes to walk.” Joy said but Seulgi can see that she’s worried too.

Seulgi sighed again. “I know. It’s just it’s getting late and we haven’t heard anything from her. I just hope nothing serious happen and she’s really okay”

“Seulgi?” Wendy mumbled when she got in their living room and saw Seulgi’s sleeping figure on the sofa

“Seul.” She called tapping her shoulder lightly “Hey, Seul…”

Seulgi squinted “Wannie?”

“Why are you sleeping here?”

Seulgi sits up “I was waiting for you. Are you okay?”

“Y-yeah, of course.” Wendy answered

Seulgi breathe in relief “But why aren’t you answering my call. I was worried.”

“I’m sorry. I… met up with some friends.” Wendy assuring her with a smile “It was sudden, and my phone was in my bag and we actually lost track of time catching up.”

“That’s fine then.” Seulgi finally smiles, as she stands up “Introduce us to them next time and you owe me breakfast.”

 “I will.” Wendy said as they walked towards their room

“Ah, right… when are you going to talk to Irene unnie?” Seulgi asked making Wendy stop from her tracks. “She locked herself up again in her room as soon as we got here, I think it’s better if you could talk to her sooner.”

“About that…” Wendy ponders “I think it’s better if we let her be.”

Seulgi was surprised, Wendy was so sure earlier that she would talk to her “You think?”

Wendy nodded “Forcing her to talk about it might get things worse, you know her she’ll talk about it when she’s ready.”

Seulgi observed Wendy for a moment then said “Okay. If that’s what you think is for the best.”

It’s been half an hour since Wendy lie down on her but seems like sleep isn’t going to visit her tonight, she sits up, then she look on Seulgi’s side, she’s peacefully sleeping.

She went to the bathroom and wash her face then as she looked at the mirror she remembers what Seulgi asked her.“When are you going to talk to Irene unnie?”

What she answered to Seulgi was true, forcing Irene to talk about things she doesn’t want to might get things worse but a big reason why she doesn’t want to talk to her was because she just doesn’t want to.

She was afraid that if she stands in front of Irene after what she found out, she might just cry and break down in front of her.

Suddenly, tears drop from her eyes.

“Wendy-ssi!”

I stop from my tracks to look back at the person calling me. “Suho?”

“Hi, I know you’re busy, I just wanted to talk to you.”

“Yeah, sure.” I answer

I and Suho are label mates, we only had small talks when we were in the same event but we’re not that close. So Suho wanting to talk to me is quite a surprise, it must be important.

“I won’t beat around the bush.” He has a serious expression. The anxiety in me suddenly kicked in.  “I am taking my chance to Irene.”

I was rendered speechless by that sentence. I didn’t know how to react or what to react.

“Since you two are over for over a year now, I’m now taking my chances with her.” He said again as if what he said the first time wasn’t clear enough.

“I-ah…” I can’t think straight, what does he expect me to say? “Suho, you… you don’t need my permission to take your chance with her.” I told him while I’m trying so hard suppressing the fact that I completely lost my composure in that single moment.

If he wanted to court Irene then he can just do it, why does he need to come up to me and say it on my face. Is it necessary? I don’t understand why he needs to tell me about it. What was he trying to achieve? Was it the look on my face that he wanted to see?

“With all due respect but I’m not asking for your permission. I don’t need you or anyone’s permission but Irene’s.” He told me “The only reason why I’m telling you this is because I respect you, I respect you as a colleague, as a person, I respect what you had with her.”

‘What I had with her.’

I suddenly feel out of breath, my heart starts beating violently that feels like it will burst out from my chest any moment now. Mustering all my willpower, though I feel my knees already lost its strength, I kept my gaze on him, keeping whatever it is that he wants to see from showing and forced myself to smile “Thank you then, for the respect.”

“I want to say thank you too, for making her happy during your time together.” Suho told me sincerely.

For someone as sweet and decent as him to even come up to me and tells me that he respects what I had with the woman she loves, he is a terrible guy.

“I’m sorry if I made uncomfortable in any way.” He apologizes “I just thought that it was the right thing to do.”

“It’s okay.” I told him but I don’t feel okay, no, not at all. “I appreciated your gesture.” That was a big lie of course. I just wish that sounded as convincing the way I pictured it in my head.

He smiled “Thank you.”

“No need, it was as you said, Irene and I are over.” It was the first time that I said it out loud and God it hurts so much, like my heart was pulled right out of my chest.

“I won’t hold you any longer then.” He said and I just nodded in response.

He turns to left.

“Suho…” My voice escape my lips, I could feel my arms shaking. There’s something that I don’t want to ask but the answer, that I need to know.

Suho turns to me “Yeah?”

“Did she…” I paused, dreads intensified inside me as my heart starts beating terrifyingly but I needed to know “Did she give you the permission to take your chance with her?”

“She did.”

Tears won’t stop streaming down Wendy’s face.

“Why are you crying?” She asked looking at her reflection on the mirror. “You broke up with her remember? It was you, so why are you crying?” she asked, wiping her tears.

“You broke up with her because you don’t want to cry anymore so why are you still crying now, you stupid.” Scolding herself in tears and finally break down “You ended it.”