A/N:

more angst if you can believe it,,,,

D+68

It was only yesterday that Eunbi was sitting in her lawyer’s office when Nako, Chaeyeon’s assistant came by with Chaeyeon’s own lawyer to hand them the divorce papers that had already been signed. It was no secret that Chaeyeon wouldn’t have wanted to see Eunbi after everything, but it still hurt.

Eunbi wished she had the same idea to not do it in person, but she knew she would back out of signing the papers if she wasn’t in the presence of other people. 

The lawyers flipped through the pages for her, before finally settling it down in front of her when they found that dreaded page, with that dreaded line that awaited Eunbi’s own signature. She scanned the page only to find Chaeyeon’s signature looking like a bloodstain. A horrible reminder of how this tragedy had unfolded.

Eunbi asked to be reminded of their agreements out of this divorce.

There wasn’t much needed to be settled anyway, but Eunbi needed to hear it again. To reassure herself that their decision was right, and that everyone will be alright by the end of it.

Chaeyeon had insisted on giving their apartment to Eunbi; it was easier for everyone, especially after Chaeyeon moved out in the same week that they decided to get the divorce. Chaeyeon had other places to go to, apartments that she owned, family members that would welcome her with open arms. Eunbi did not. 

A large part of their divorce revolved around Wonyoung, the daughter they share custody over. That will remain unchanged for the most part. The agreement will allow them to alternate weeks for Wonyoung’s living arrangement until she becomes of legal age to choose her permanent dwelling. Wonyoung had been silent all throughout that discussion, safe for a nod and a shake of her head. Eunbi and Chaeyeon have shared many things in their decade-long life together, but never in their dreams could they imagine they would have to share the burden of scarring their daughter with a legal separation.

Everything else was sorted fairly quickly, the prenup they had made sure of that. The split for assets was fair. Besides, Eunbi knew Chaeyeon wouldn’t screw her over, no matter how badly everything turned out. 

Of course, there wouldn’t be an outcome that was ideal––but at least all of them would be taken care of.

With a of a pen, it was done. Or undone. 15 years of their relationship annulled by ink on paper.

After everything was settled, Eunbi’s lawyer gave her the statistics for divorce which says that 60% of couples married at the age between 20 - 25 will end in divorce. Another one said that people who marry after the age of 25 are 24% less likely to get divorced. She probably was just trying to make Eunbi feel better, to tell her that it wasn't her fault that the marriage had ended. It didn’t convince her, nor did it make Eunbi feel any better.

Eunbi doubts she’s ever thought about this before, that is, getting a divorce. Maybe it was pride that led her to believe that it wouldn’t affect her. Eunbi thought she was in the clear of this statistic––she did marry at 27. She should have been 24% less likely to divorce. Eunbi knows 24% wasn’t a big number... and then again, Chaeyeon was 22 when they got married. Eunbi could blame this all on her.

But that would be a lie.

Before this, none of it feels relevant. Maybe Eunbi from pre-accident would feel the same, or differently, she may never know. All she knows is, all of a sudden, she’s just another dot in a graph of data for divorcees.

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“Good to see you again, Eunbi. It’s been awhile.” Chaewon says. With Eunbi's resounding silence, pleasantries were put to the side quickly. “So you’re divorced.” It was more a statement than a question, one that still made Eunbi ill to think about, considering it was finalized just yesterday.

Eunbi answers anyway, “Yes.”

“How do you feel?” Chaewon asks.

The question left Eunbi unsure, as it always did. It was one that Chaewon asked of her at the start of every session, and Eunbi would have a different answer each time. Her answers could be a variation of fine, it could be different forms of adjectives to say she was feeling bad, and for the last few weeks before uncovering the truth, it has been synonyms for wonderful. 

This time, Eunbi almost didn’t have the words to describe what she was feeling. Except for, “Guilty,” Eunbi says. Chaewon had given her a look that asked her to say more. Eunbi pondered on it for a moment, “I just feel like all my decisions keep hurting her.” Eunbi leans back and regards her therapist seriously and asks, “Do you think I made a mistake?”

“Having the divorce?”

Eunbi nods. “Was it the right decision?”

“I can't really say, Eunbi. The last time we saw each other, you were quite content with your relationship, safe for a few reservations. Why do you think you needed to divorce in the first place?”

Eunbi shrugs, but says, “I needed to. The things that happened between us got too complicated. I found out that we were separated even before my accident, but Chaeyeon lied to me about it, buried all the problems like they didn’t exist. She acted like we were okay, that we were still in love…” Eunbi pauses, having a far off look on her face. “And when you’re the object of her affections, it's hard not to think that I was in love with her too.”

“You don’t think it was genuine, the feelings you had for her?”

Eunbi wanted to immediately dismiss that idea, but doesn't. “I–I care about her. Deeply,” Eunbi admits. Then, she lets out a sigh. “But, before the accident... I cheated on her, and then asked for a divorce.” i