Date
Secret Admirer
I read TS' Chapter 24 for the 246249867246246th time this morning, and I think the frown in my face is already deeply etched. GAAAAHHHHHH I really really really really don't like thinking like this. But I just can't help but be sad.
Who wants to know why?
Well, it's obvious, isn't it? It's Big Bang's last day here. They'll be leaving tomorrow, and they only have one schedule for today: a photoshoot. After that... nothing. Big Bang will be leaving soon... Youngbae. He'll be leaving soon, too. So I'm reading the chapter in TS when it was Jiyong's last day in the girl's country so I could maybe find some sort of way to handle it.
BUT ALL I READ WAS THAT SHE CRIED AT THE END OF THE CHAPTER! After the whole shopping ordeal, she cried so hard, she cried herself to sleep. How can I- I mean-
I don't even know why I'm reacting like this. I mean, they're really supposed to leave, right? But why do I feel so sad? I mean... I can't really do anything about it, can I? I can't convince him to stay, anyway. I have nothing to do but try to be okay about it. But why am I not?
"_________-ah?" I looked at Youngbae who was sitting right beside me. We were all in the car, going to the photoshoot schedule.
"Wae? What is it?"
"Kwaenchanah?" He held my hand, "You look... not okay."
"Ani," I tried to smile, "It's nothing."
"Even your smile looks weird," he chuckled. I pouted, not having any answer. If my smile looks weird, then he should know something's wrong. I lay my head on his shoulder.
"I don't wanna go either," I heard him whisper. I felt myself stiffen when I heard him say that. He doesn't wanna leave? "Let's have today for just the two of us, araseo?"
I felt myself smile and nod, at least I can have some time with him today.
The photoshoot went well, obviously. They all looked awesome posing for the camera: you can really see the individuality each of them had. It's always surprising to see Seunghyun though: I mean, you'd think that he's like, a really serious person on camera or onstage, but in real life he's just this really weird person.
"How was I?" Youngbae asked as they went to change after the shoot.
I gave a thumbs up, "You were good."
"Gomawo," he beamed. After he finished changing his clothes, he immediately grabbed my hand and dragged me to the car. The only ones riding were the two of us and the driver. Once he closed the door, he told the driver to drive to the mall.
"We're leaving them?!" I looked at him, bewildered.
"I told you," he looked at me, "We'll have the day today, just the two of us. Do you really want Seungri disturbing?"
I shook my head right away. "We're going to the mall?" He nodded. "Just like in TS..."
"TS?" He looked at me.
"It's this fanfic I really love," I beamed.
"AH~ The one with Jiyong as the main guy."
I stared at him, shocked. "YOU KNOW IT?!"
"Beause of you," he laughed. "If you don't wanna go to a mall, then..." Youngbae leaned closer to the driver and whispered something. The driver immediately nodded.
"What did you tell him?" I looked at him.
He just smiled and let me lean on his shoulder. "Sleep. I'll wake you up when we get there."
Seeing that I didn't have any choice, I just closed my eyes and slept, shifting closer to him.
I woke up a while later to his light shaking. "We're here, _________-ah."
I opened my eyes and looked around. Looking at our position, I saw that I shifted towards him and I was like hugging him. He had his arm around my waist and when I looked up, he was softly gazing at me.
"Where are we?" I think my cheeks are burning up.
"Kaja," he slowly pried off me and took my hand. I sat up straight and held his hand back. He opened the door and got out, helping me get out. Once I got out of the car, I was greeted by the most amazing sight.
We were at the beach. It wasn't even summer and yet we were at the beach. I've been here only once in my life. It was the time when me, Yana, Holly, and Karina just finished all our exams after the semester and we just wanted to release some stress, so we rode the bus and ended up going here.
"Come on," he smiled and pulled me to the sand. We sat down there and just looked at the sea. I checked my watch, it was already 4 in the afternoon.
"It's already 4," I frowned. "What time do you need to get back?"
"I told manager hyung that I'd go home late," he smiled. "I wanna spend the rest of today with you, so let's not think about anything else, ne?"
I smiled and lied down on the sand and looked up at the sky. "I like this place: it's like you can escape from the world."
I felt Youngbae lie down beside me, "I wish we can escape the world. I don't wanna go." My eyes widened and I turned my head to him to see him looking at me. "Do you want me to go?"
"No," I breathed. "Ah~!" I felt myself tearing up. "I really don't want you to go."
Seeing the tears, Youngbae turned to me and hugged me, letting me use his arm as a pillow as he his hair. "Hey, don't cry..."
"I got used to you around already," I sniffled. "Not just you, but the others as well. How can I be okay after you leave?"
"We can always talk," he comforted me. "Remember in that fanfic? Jiyong and the girl still got to talk even after he went back. We'll still be like that, I'll never stop talking to you."
"I'm not doubting that, it's just-" How can I say that I don't want him to leave because I feel like I'll be so sad without him? That he was the person I most looked forward to seeing every morning?
"Malhae, _________-ah. What's on your mind?"
I sat up and brushed the sand off my hair, "I just-" I took a deep breath, "I'm just used to seeing you and the others everyday. So even if it's just a month, it'll be awkward for me to go back to my normal life."
I felt Youngbae's arms wrap around my waist and his head on my left shoulder. "You know I feel the same way, right?" He took a deep breath. "I'm already too used to seeing your face every morning, and saying good night to you personally. I'm already used to getting to hold you like this every chance I get. I'm already used to everything about you. I don't know how I'll be after I go back to Korea."
My eyes went wide as he said that. Whether that was a confession of sorts or not, it made the amusement park in my stomach bigger... I think there are quite a lot of people riding the roller coaster there right now.
"I have something to give you," he suddenly said. He stood up and right in front of me, sitting back down. He smiled and wiped the bottom of my eyes with his thumb before getting a rectangular box from his jacket's inner pocket. "I must have no originality," he chuckled before opening the box.
My eyes went wide and I heard myself gasp when I saw what was inside. It was a silver necklace with a simple heart for a pendant. "Y-You-" I looked up at him. [a/n: Why does Youngbae have no originality? Check out TS' Chapter 23 :)]
"I bought it while we were at the mall. I didn't know what to buy for you so here," he chuckled. "You like it?"
"I love it," I smiled. "Can I?"
"I'll put it on for you," he beamed and took the necklace. I leaned my head on his shoulder as he clasped the necklace on.
Once it was on, I touched the pretty pendant and smiled. "Gomawo..."
"It'll be fine, geujji?" Youngbae wrapped his arms around me. "It's gonna be alright."
A few more hours after the sun has set when we finally decided to go back. Youngbae took me home and we stood in front of the gates for more than 30 minutes, just looking at each other.
"We'll pick you up early tomorrow?" he was holding my hand.
I nodded, "Good night."
"Good night," he hugged me one more time. I hugged him back and just buried my head in his chest for a few minutes before both of us finally had to let go. He went inside the van and was gone almost immediately.
I can still see him tomorrow. It'll be fine... right?
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HAI GAIS!!!
I don't update for a long time and now that I have, it's not a very happy chapter. :)) I =))
OH WELL~
What else should I say? :))
Do you guys read the Story Feed thing on the left side of the page? :))
I hope you liked this update! Thank you so much for all the comments!!!
@nhichole18: If Youngbae asked her to be his girl then... I wouldn't be able to think of anything else after that =))))))))
@Seonriyong: Heehee it wasn't a ring =)) Saranghaeeeeee~~
If anyone ever reads this feed, SA is a spinoff of TS, yes? So yeah, just decode =)) Comment if you get it! If ever you read this, that is ^^
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