Kai

While Kai walks, Sehun recites things for a test besides him, seeming to easily be able to keep up with the punk’s pace. "Tests are really important for our grade."

"Yep," Kai replies, not slightly interested. He lights a cigarette as Sehun keeps talking. Not that he’s listening because he didn't really care about any of that. As if it isn’t enough that he needs to study and do his damn homework, but now they expect him to sit in a classroom for an hour writing down everything he learned. He thought Homework did that but whatever. Because that either way. "So, why you following me around? On my WEEKEND?"

"I'm bored," Sehun admits. "And all my friends are busy."

"I'm not your friend."

"I never said you were," Sehun laughs. "Anyways, I'm just listing off a few things and listening to music- am I really bothering you?"

Kai glances at him and shrugs. "Nah, not really." The two walks as the boy continues. He mentions colleges he wants to go to and Kai finds himself listening to that; for some reason. But he stops when Sehun glances at a couple.

"What are clubs like? Inside?"

"I don't know," Kai responds. "Depends on the place, I guess. I don't go to clubs unless it's Jonghyun's. Everywhere else is a piece of ."

"Tao used to go to a lot of clubs," Sehun says. "He never let me join him."

"Why not?"

Sehun shrugs. "He always says he doesn’t want me going in those kinds of places; he was protecting me, I think.”

"From what? Drunk s?" Sehun goes silent. He doesn’t seem to want to talk much about Tao. "You seem kind of fragile- maybe that's it."

Sehun blushes and crosses his arms. "I'm not fragile and Tao knew that."

"I said seemed," Kai chuckles, "Not that you were..." Kai suddenly stops, putting an arm out to halt Sehun as well. He sighs and crosses his arms when he notices the man he beat. "You again?" Kai stares in disinterest when Krystal's boyfriend as he points to his face.

"See what you did to me?!"

"A face only that could love," Kai says calmly. "What the you want?"

He huffs and takes a step forward. "I saw you walking along and I decided it's time for you to learn not to mess with me." Kai stays quiet, staring at him as he expects him to get to his point. “I almost had to have surgery because of you!"

"Hey, I was just tryin’ to help improve your face."

"Shut up, Kai!" The man snaps and gets closer. Sehun becomes visibly shaken, tugging on the punk's arm and silently begging for them to just leave. "What's up, Kai? You hangin' around twinks now?!"

Sehun frowns. "What's a ?"

Kai rolls his eyes. "He's sayin' you look like a woman."

"What? I do not!" Sehun looks at him, obviously offended. “It’s obvious that I’m a guy! A-are you blind?!”

"I’m startin’ to think he might be,” Kai yawns. "Look, I don't have time for you right now." When he tries to walk past the guy, he’s grabbed by the shirt and roughly slammed against a wall. Kai sighs when he drops his cigarette. He gives the man a bored look. Sehun gasps and takes a step closer. It looks like he wants to say something but the punk shakes his head to keep him quiet.

"What’s your deal, ?! I thought you were over Krystal!”

"I couldn't give two ing s about your damn cow," Kai laughs when the man yanks him away, only to slam him into the wall again.

"Shut the hell up!”

Kai pushes the man away, feeling a bit weak due to the heavy force to his back. If he’s being honest, the dude is actually quite strong. Not too strong but enough to hurt. “Whatever- just off." Kai sighs, turning to face Sehun. "Come on, crybaby, we're leaving." He goes to Sehun's and glances over his shoulder at the man; his face red with anger. "Walk it off, needle ,” He smirks before he starts to walk away.

"Jongin!” Sehun shouts and grabs onto his arm tightly. Kai quickly turns, expecting to find the man walking away but is instead met with a rushing fist towards him. He readies himself for impact, expecting a hard punch. Sehun swiftly steps in between the two, the man's hard knuckles connecting hard against Sehun's face. He falls into Kai, knocking both of them over. He cries out in pain as he covers his face, blood seeping from his nose and lip. Kai grabs onto Sehun's shoulders and glares up at the man with wide, angry eyes.

“Are you ing serious!?” Kai explodes, losing his cool. He doesn’t care if he got punch, but the nerd was a whole other story. “You crossed the line this time, er!”

"I-I was aiming for you- it's not my fault that...that kid..." Krystal’s boyfriend stutters as he slowly begins to back up. He stares at Sehun and then at all his blood before turning and quickly making a run for it.

“ing run!” Kai shouts. “Before I beat your goddamn face in again, you ing coward!” He curses and stands, being gentle when he helps Sehun up. He rushes him to a nearby shop and sits him down on a bench. He turns to a cashier. “I need some napkins!” The cashier gasps and nods, rushing over to them with a roll of paper towel. It’s not like Sehun is going to bleed to death but the punk can’t help but panic. He knows what to do when he gets a bloody nose but Sehun’s different. The guy looks like he’s never even been slapped before that day with his mother. Kai sighs and sits beside Sehun, pushing the boy's hand away from his face. "You're an idiot," He mutters, using some pieces from the roll to cover Sehun's nose. "Why the hell did you do that?”

Sehun shakily touches his bloodied lip. Kai pushes his hand away again, pinching Sehun's nose with a piece of the towel "I don't know,” He laughs quietly.

"You don't know? You got yourself punched for me and you don't ing know?"

Sehun winces. "This really hurts, Jongin,” He whines softly.

"You're ing stupid," Kai groans and Sehun frowns.

"You curse like a sailor."

"Shut up," Kai replies and stands up. "Come on, my place is nearby."

Sehun looks up at him in what seems to be confusion. "Your house?" He asks, standing up with him. Kai lets go of the paper towel, letting Sehun keep it over his nose. He tries to return the rest of the roll but Kai just pulls him away. He isn’t sure if the cashier’s pissed off that they took the roll, but he honestly doesn’t give a . The dumb kid is bleeding everywhere and he’s trying to be nice.

The walk to Kai's home isn’t very long; only a few blocks away. It isn’t a very nice neighborhood but not a lot of crime aside from mugging, graffiti, and other petty crime happens. All except mugging, Kai participated in. Once inside his house, Kai doesn't bother taking off his shoes. Sehun bends down to try and take his off but Kai stops him. "Forget it," He says before going to the fridge. He notices there was no sound from the TV, and it’s way too early for his father to be asleep. "We're lucky." Kai takes a beer and turns to Sehun. "My dad's not home."

Sehun shakes his head. "No, thank you."

Kai shrugs and motions for him to follow him up the stairs. "Suit yourself." He opens the door and steps to the side, allowing Sehun to go in first. He might be an , but his mother taught him to be a gentleman, kind of.

Kai doesn't go home often unless he’s wanting to sleep. Even then, he tries to stay at Taemin's apartment. He thought it’d be weird with Jonghyun but they both assured him it’s fine. And unlike Sehun's room, Kai's isn't very decorated and his walls are brown instead of blue, old tan wood planks for floors. His queen-sized bed is the first thing they see when they enter his room, a tan quilt neatly covering a red comforter. A black, furry rug laid in the middle of the room.

"This is a lot warmer than my room," Sehun comments. "It feels more...cozy. It might be because you don’t let your father decide everything for you…”

Kai shrugs and sits on the bed, setting his beer on his nightstand. Sehun stands in front of the full-body mirror and sighs as he looks at himself. He looks down and tries to wipe the blood from his white shirt with another piece of paper towel.

Kai shakes his head. "Stop- You're just gonna make it worse."

"This , Jongin," Sehun groaned. "This is going to stain."

"Shouldn't have gotten yourself punched."

Sehun keeps his eyes set on himself. "Then...then you would have gotten hurt."

"So?" Kai says with a sigh. He goes over to his drawer and pulls out a shirt. "I've gotten hurt before- here, take off your shirt."

Sehun blushes and covers himself. "W-what?"

"Take off your shirt," Kai repeats. "Unless you wanna stay in that bloody shirt?"

Sehun looks around nervously and shakes his head. "You'll have to turn around." Kai shrugs and takes Sehun's spot by the mirror. He pretends to check himself out but he watches as Sehun pulls off his shirt. He’s actually surprised to see that the boy isn’t all bones- he has a skinny but toned body. If Kai has to guess, it’s from his dancing.

"You've never gotten punched before, huh?" Kai asks as he stares at Sehun through the mirror. He narrows his eyes when he notices freshly cut marks on the boy's arm- straight, pink lines. Again, a few hours early. What also catches his eye are black and blue bruises, as well as some scars across his pale back. Either this kid is into , or he’s getting bullied at school. Kai thinks maybe abusive parents but decides against it. That day was the first time she’s ever hit Sehun; Kai can tell.

"So um..." Sehun turns and Kai can feel his cheeks heat up. He doesn't have tight abs like Jonghyun did but more like Taemin's soft ones. Regardless of the fact that Sehun has these secret, soft abs- he still seems gentle, soft, fragile; as if a single touch would break him. "You never u-uh.." Kai curses and grabs his beer. What the hell is wrong with me?!

"What?"

Kai takes a deep breath and sits on his bed. To his relief, Sehun finally puts on one of Kai's tank tops. He tries to cover his arms but Kai pushes his hands away."Forget it, I've already seen them." Sehun seems to give up and takes a seat beside him. "Tell me why you do it."

"Why?"

"I told you about Taemin- it's your turn."

"They're old- it doesn't matter."

"They're not old."

"How can you tell?"

"I told you, Taemin used to do that," Kai says impatiently. "Tell me."

Sehun shakes his head. "You've never going to let this go, are you?"

"I'm a stubborn bastard," Kai says simply. He hands Sehun his beer. "It'll calm you down."

"Oh, I don't…”

"You shoplifted and you're nervous to drink a little alcohol?" Kai chuckles. "You're ing weird."

Sehun sighs and hesitates a moment before slowly bringing the beer to his lips and taking a swig. He lets out a sigh and Kai waits for the boy to gag. But by the way he takes in the alcohol, previous experience is obvious. It makes the punk smirk a little and he starts to think that maybe Sehun isn’t as much of a goody-two-shoes as he thought. “I haven’t had alcohol in a while,” He admits. “N-not since…” He clears his throat. Sehun scoots closer to Kai, handing the bottle back to him. "It started with Tao," Sehun begins.

"Your uh, 'best friend'?"

"Yeah," Sehun says and uses air quotes. "Best friend." Kai takes another drink and passes it back, waiting for him to continue. "I've always been kind of depressed- not many friends. And I’m kind of bullied,” He pauses. “My parents are never home either but even when they are they.." He sighs and stares at the brown liquid. "They fight about everything; money, work, love...and mostly me."

"You?"

Sehun nods. "They fight about me the most. My mother wants me to an expressive school and gets into real estate, like her. My father, however," Sehun smiles fondly. "He wants me to just do whatever I want- he was really happy when I told him I wanted to go to school for music. I told my mother but she...she got so mad." Sehun shakes his head. "I met Tao during the beginning of my freshmen year. He had caught me dancing after school and he," Sehun laughs and sniffs. "He told me even though I looked ridiculous, I looked so beautiful. Of course, he could not dance, though he tried." Sehun smiles and takes another gulp. Not a sip this time. "He would always come back to watch me; I was so embarrassed at first but..."

"But?" Kai asks.

"Tao had a way to make anyone feel safe; to make them come out of their shell- even me. When I was with him, nothing else mattered. And my mother absolutely loved him but she..." Sehun shallows. "She didn't know we loved each other...not just mentally."

Kai stares at him, a bit dumbfounded. He opens his mouth to say something but only stuttering comes out. "Y-you, uhh..."

Sehun shrugs. "I'm not a ."

Kai laughs nervously. “I figured when you told me about his tattoos but , Sehun."

After smiling at Kai briefly, Sehun goes on. "He'd sneak into my room at night and he-" He sniffs, and rubs his eyes. "He filled the void inside of me. He...he made me feel like everything wasn't going to just burn up in flames- my world wasn't going to crumble." Sehun offers it back to Kai but he just shakes his head. He figures the kid needs it a lot more than he does. When Sehun downs the rest of the beer, the punk smiles at that again. "I started photography because of him," Sehun continues. "He made the perfect model." Sehun pulls out his phone and looks through it for a second. He hands it to Kai, showing him a photo of Tao; He’s crouched down, wearing a leather jacket and jeans tucked into black combat boots. His wrists and fingers riddled bracelets and rings. Kai can see at least three piercing on his left ear, and two on his right. His stare is intense and, honestly, kind of intimidating. His fashion, oddly enough, is very similar to Kai's own. "It helped that he liked being in front of a camera."

"He...uh, looks kind of..."

"Intense? intimidating?" Sehun says for him. "y?"

Kai snorts and hands it back to him. "Sure," he rolls his eyes but Sehun just smiles. His smile, however, quickly falters as continues his story.

"All of a sudden, everything just...stopped. He stopped kissing me, stopped telling me he loved me. He even stopped visiting me at night." Sehun sighs at the empty bottle and sets it down. "I was so confused, scared...hurt."

"I don't blame you," Kai mumbles.

"One day, he came to me and sat me down. He...said he accepted a scholarship in China and he was going to move there soon. I was- I was so mad and I yelled at first. But then I just cried, I begged him to take me with him." Kai looks at the floor, processing everything he's being told. He actually started to feel bad. "But he-he..." Sehun covers his face and takes a deep breath. He rubs his eyes with his hands. "He said he would always love me but..."

"Tao just left you? For school?" Kai asks, feeling disgusted. Who'd ever give up their love for something stupid like that? Kai knows, for god damn sure, he'd never do something stupid like that. He knows real love doesn't come that often, so why waste it just for a ing scholarship? Tao starts to piss Kai off. "What a piece of !"

Sehun shakes his head. "N-no, h-he..."

Kai lets out a frustrated sigh, going quiet now. Sehun's lip begins to quiver as he struggles. "Tao was my anchor- he kept me grounded." Sehun's voice cracks. "He left and I...I had no one- my parents got worse and my world crumbled. Tao told me I'd be fine but I," Sehun takes a deep breath and stands up. "I wasn’t...and even now, I don't feel fine! I don’t...I don’t feel OKAY." Kai slowly stands as well, joining him by the window. "I was in the hospital all last summer before school started.”

Kai narrows his eyes. "Why?"

"I..." Sehun stares out the window, seeming to have a hard time saying whatever was on his mind. "I took a lot of pills all at once and I-I..." He closes his eyes and shakes his head. "My parents were out of town a-and I figured it'd be a perfect opportunity. They left their alcohol out and..." Sehun trails off. "And if Suho hadn't found me..."

Kai stares at Sehun, feeling a knot in his stomach; He’s starting to feel sick. "You...tried to kill yourself?

"I had no one. I have Suho and the others but they...they just, they didn't understand. They never struggle, they're always happy." Sehun rests his head against the cold glass. "I'm never...I'm never happy anymore,” He quietly admits.

"What're you talking about?" Kai asks. "You're...ugh, you always look happy- sickeningly happy; So happy it pisses me off!"

Sehun laughs dryly. "I know," He admits again. "I should be acting instead of dancing, right?"

Kai stares at him and shakes his head slightly. "Sehun...are you depressed?" Sehun doesn't say anything but he doesn’t have to; that silence tells Kai everything. "Do...you still think about doing it?"

Sehun bites his lip. "I feel better lately," He says. "It's weird but you help distract me."

"But...?"

Sehun sighs. "The thought is ALWAYS in the back of my mind. It would be really easy, especially on the weekends- no one is ever home. It's a small little voice and it's...growing stronger every day."

"Yeah, well..." Kai takes a deep breath, trying to calm himself down. He takes out a cigarette and lights it; Sehun opens the window for him. "You're not allowed to die."

"Oh?" Sehun looks at him. "And why not? Why would you care?"

Kai shrugs. "Hey, you're the only thing keeping me out of jail."

Sehun looks at him with a grim expression. “...Is that it?” He asks, his voice hurt.

"Yeah, I mean, I guess you're kind of cool, too." Not that he’d completely admit it, but Kai does think Sehun is a pretty cool person. Besides all the nerdy stuff, anyways. And he’s pretty sure the boy isn’t tight-assed as he originally thought.

"You think I'm cool?" Sehun smiles shyly.

"Or whatever," Kai mumbles. He thinks about it for a moment. He swallows hard at the thought of Sehun going through with it. FInding his body hanging or in a bathtub, blood everywhere. Kai would feel incredibly guilty; even if It's not his fault Sehun is depressed. But he's not sure how he feels if he just one day found Sehun dead. He'd be pissed off. At himself, at Sehun, and at everyone who knew Sehun. How can someone spend so much time with someone and not know they’re suicidal? "We're gonna hang out on weekends, and Wednesdays."

"We are?"

"Yeah," Kai says. "Can't have you dying on me before I get those stupid good grades."

"I dance on Wednesday."

"Perfect," Kai shrugs. "I can teach you how to actually dance properly and not like a retarded monkey."

"I know how to dance," Sehun argues, now frowning.

"Sure you do, - that ballet really let your talents shine."

"Well, I'm still learning that! I can do other dances!"

"It's not difficult," Kai scoffs. "Not for me, at least."

Sehun shakes his head but he has a grin on his face. He sits back down on the bed. "Who was that guy who punched me?"

Kai turns to face him and leans his back against the window sill. "My ex-girlfriend's boyfriend."

"You beat his face in?"

"Yep."

"Why?"

"I dunno."

Sehun's brow furrows. "You beat a guys face in and you don't know?"

"Let's start dancing tomorrow," Kai says, changing the subject. It's not like the memory pained him; it's quite the opposite, actually. He honestly just didn't think it’s all that important. To Sehun, at least.

"You want to dance? On your day off?"

"Want me to walk you home?" He asks, not being serious. "Or are you gonna get yourself beat on again?" Sehun stands up and grabs his jacket. He goes to take the shirt off but Kai stops him. "Keep it, nosebleed. I don't want something YOU'VE been in.”

"I can walk on my own," Sehun rolls his eyes and pulls his leather jacket on.

Kai smirks and crosses his arms. "Wear leather more, alright?"

"You don't want me to kill myself," Sehun begins. "You want my mother to kill me." Kai laughs as Sehun exits the room, giving him a small wave goodbye. "I'll see you tomorrow, Jongin."

“It’s...Kai,” Kai sighs and closes the door, giving up. “Whatever.” He turns back to the dresser and squints at the bloody shirt. He’s unsure what to really do with it. It’s not like he could toss it out or give it back to Sehun; it’s obvious that the kid has no idea how to clean anything properly. Being born rich and having a privileged home, he wouldn’t know two s. And it’s not like Kai is doing this because he cares. Because he doesn’t, obviously.

--------------------------

*Tsundere Kai intensifies*