"So where do we start?" Jisoo asks me once she hops into the front seat of my car. We decided to take mine instead of hers because it'd be easier for me to drive through old streets than give directions on where Rose, Jiwon and I used to hang out. I go to start up the car and my hand hangs onto the keys as I realize that I have not one clue on where to start this hunt.

"I don't know." I say in defeat.

The brand new perspective I left the coffee shop with only moments before has now left me. It came quick and left even faster. I fall back against my seat and feel sadness start to make its decent from my head down to my heart and before it can go any further I notice Jisoo's hand as it rests on my leg, showing me full support and I feel myself freeze under her touch. Uhm...what is this? I look at her and her eyes are bright and hopeful and the internal panic that I am clearly undergoing has no affect on her whatsoever.

"Lis it's okay. It took me a while to find my spot with Jin even if we did go there pretty much every single day. I had to follow a routine he and I would do every morning just to realize something I always knew. So how about we do that?"

I felt weak. Like a small child, helpless, on their first day of school. I look at her bashfully and mumble out an 'okay'. Who is this person?! I was being shy and pathetic and really sad. Not in that 'I feel sorry for this person' kind of way, like a 'grow a pair' kind of way. I do not like it one bit but when it comes to this part of my life I feel like I need to be lead by the hand to do anything. Jisoo's holding out hers for me to grab, dare I take it?

I sigh, scratching my forehead and I taking my lip between my teeth, nodding in response because right now I can't speak. I'm feeling...I don't know. There I go again, not knowing a damn thing. All I know is that I want my best friends to make sense of this for me, because nothing makes sense. I want them back and I'm going on a search to find a piece of them, a piece of me that left when they did. I exhale like I'm about to take a giant leap into something I'm not ready for. Maybe I am, maybe I need to, Rose would tell me to go for it. Jiwon would tell me that annoying acronym 'yolo'.

"Yolo Lis, yolo." He'd say it exactly like that. His voice rings in my head. I hated when he said that because he should still be here. He didn't realize how true that statement was...is. As exasperated as it is.

I'm not entirely sure how much time has passed since I got in the car and I don't think Jisoo is keeping track. Her hand is still on my leg and she's still looking at me supportively. I'm growing to really appreciate the way she looks at me. She's the only one that doesn't look at me the way that I feel. Like I'm broken. She looks at me like there's still hope, like there is still life in me.

I turn my car on and Jisoo pulls her hand away and sits back into the chair. I look at her briefly and put the car in drive.

"Where's our first stop?"

"School." I say, choosing to follow the routine I started without realizing. I started a regular school day with my friends, first at the coffee shop and now we're off to class.

"Cool." Is all Jisoo says as she lets her arm dangle out of the window that she just rolled down. "Onward." I snort out a laugh and she joins in freely.

It only takes about twenty minutes before I'm in front of my high school. I park the car in front and sit in my seat.

"Do you want to go inside?"

I look at the building hoping that would help with my decision. I haven't stepped foot in those halls since before the accident. I didn't even go to graduation. I didn't see the point. If I couldn't reach a milestone with the people I grew up with then it wasn't worth it. Two months left in school but I couldn't take it, so I left school early, got my GED in the mail and off to the army I went. I exhale deeply and shake my head no.

"Alright that's fine. This day doesn't have to be overwhelming." She tells me and I drop my shoulders in relief. She gets it... of course she does. She's gone through this herself and I forget that a lot of the time.

"Thank you." I tell her with much appreciation and she just nods knowingly.

"So you go to the coffee house, and then head to school, then..."

I just shrug and run my hand through my hair. I'm growing frustrated really quickly and I don't want to do this anymore. I think Jisoo can sense that as well because she places her hand on my shoulder this time.

"We can just call it quits. We don't have to do this today. It'll help but only when you're ready."

I'm ready I just don't want to have to go through all the heartache of remembering everything in order to get there. I've spent all this time running from it and now I've got to go through it all to find an inkling of peace. I don't know when I got so lazy, I'm used to my being whooped into shape in some way. It's always been physical I guess now it's time for an emotional whooping. I'm not doing any favors to Rose or Jiwon by forgetting who they were; forgetting who I was with them. I try my best to shake the coward off of me and start thinking of all the places I ever went with them on a regular basis.

"We were normal teenagers I suppose. We did the normal things, mall, hanging at the beach, hanging at each others houses. Randomly ended up places we never planned on ending up."

I look at Jisoo and she's wearing her smile that I'm growing quite fond. I pull my bottom lip into my mouth to fight off the effects of her contagious smile. I just shrug as I wrack my brain for a spot that means more than I ever thought it would.

"What's one place you guys found and it felt like yours even if it may have been visited by other people. A place that you guys went just because it made you feel like you were the only people on the earth."

The more she describes the place the clearer it becomes for me. I smile and start the car back up. She doesn't ask where we're going. She can see the determination in my eyes as I drive through the traffic. A little excited to go to a place I haven't been to in so long. I pull into a spot in the parking lot of Elm Park and Jisoo looks around the area with curiosity.

"I know it doesn't look..." She cuts me off with a look that's telling me to stop talking nonsense.

"I'm just happy you're allowing me to go on this journey with you."

"I'm happy you're doing this with me." I reveal and her breath hitches a bit. I'm just as surprised as she is with how straightforward I've been. We share the moment for a few more seconds until I remember why I'm here. We break eye contact and get out of the car.

I inhale with enthusiasm and take a familiar step forward. Even though I haven't been here in years walking to our spot feels as if I only left it yesterday. Jisoo is kind enough to stay several feet behind, allowing her presence to be comforting opposed to overwhelming. I can't help but marvel at this person that collided into my life. I imagine a group of twelve-year olds ahead of me.

A lanky boy with curly brown hair on the left, a shorter brunette in the middle with a straight ponytail, and a sassy girl to the right of her with wild light brown hair, I breathe out a laugh as I watch them race the trail ahead of me. The little girl pushes the lanky boy and he whines petulantly while the small brunette laughs along with her friend. The boy threatens to give the girls noogies and chases after them. I turn down off the beaten path and duck under low branches. The group grows in front of my eyes as all three of them are more filled out. Whether it be muscles, chests, or backsides. It's clear that they are older. They're sixteen this time and the teenage boy is talking about a party as the sounds of water become more distinct.

I reach our spot and the group disappears. Everyone except for one, I see a younger me turn to look at me and smile genuinely. I look around and close my eyes. The light filters in through the leaves from the trees above. The creek flows smoothly as waves of water cascades down from one boulder to another. I take a spot on my usual boulder. I take off my shoes and let my legs hang off my rock as the water glides under my feet. I lean back against my palms and lift my face towards the sky. I hear them, their laughs, their taunting. I remember old conversations. Conversations that consisted confessions of ual experiences, our fears, our dreams, our plans, where we would go from here. Things that they'll never get to experience and tears start to roll down from my eyes. I don't try to stop them because this is our place. We never held anything back from each other here and I'm not going to stop now. I pull my legs from the water, towards my chest as I cry into my knees. My cries turn into sobs and I know I'm loud but I can't care because here I need to cry, here I know they know how sorry I am, here I take the first step I need to make in order to let go of all the bad and remember good. Here I say a proper goodbye and turn it into a see you later.

"I miss you guys so much. I'm sorry you aren't here. If there was anything I could do to bring you back I'd do it in a heartbeat. I'm sorry it's taken me so long to realize where I could find you. Nothing is the same without you. I'm not the same without you." I drop my forehead against my knees. The rest of my tears are accompanied with some sniffles. I keep my eyes closed, felling the pain of a slight headache from all the crying. I inhale deeply before I slowly rock myself back and forth.

I lose myself in my memories that the creek brings back to me. I feel warm and the guilt I always feel is nonexistent in our spot. It's like I can hear Rose telling me to it up and feel Jiwon supportively rub my back. The imagined feeling turns real as I feel a smaller hand on my shoulders. I look up and Jisoo's smiling down at me. I return the smile and she's looking a little shy. I'm remembering the Jisoo the first day we met. It feels so long ago since she came into my life and she's easily—quickly—became someone I can't imagine it without.

"I'm sorry to bother you, I just grabbed you water, I figured you'd be dehydrated from all the..." She clears leaving the assumption in the air. I'm not catching on and she clarifies. "...crying."

"I do have a headache." I confess and grab the water bottle from her. I look at it, curious where she got it from.

"The snack bar near the parking lot." She answers before I can even ask and she giggles knowing that my confusion turns into horror because she can read my mind. She rolls her eyes, clearly knowing the internal monologue that is going on right now. "When I figured out my spot I was there for six hours straight crying, I even fell asleep a few times. When I finally got home I ate and drank as if I'd never had food before."

"Wow six hours?"

She just nods and sighs. I know she's thinking about Jin, so I sit in silence with her showing respect to him as well. I didn't know him but knowing his sister I consider myself lucky and imagine how great he must've been.

"Yeah it's easy to lose track. You've been here for a little over two."

My eyes shoot open in surprise and she giggles. I push myself up and lose my balance. She catches me and helps me up. She's very close and I breathe her in by accident. I shut my eyes and let her consume my senses.

"I guess I'm more tired than I realized."

"Yeah." She breathes out as her eyes scan my face. We take a step away from each, blushing slightly. "I'm not rushing you or anything I'm fine writing. I found my way back to the car I can just..."

"No no it's fine, you've done so much for me I don't want you just waiting around too."

"I'd wait any amount of time for you." She answers smoothly and my stomach flips. She's looking at me with a charming smile and I just nibble on my bottom lip.

"I'll try my best to not make you wait much longer." I answer that with a subtext that I wasn't aware I was trying to make. She just winks at me and points back in the direction she came from. I watch as she leaves and I turn to face the creek again. "She's the reason I'm here." I tell my friends as I drop my feet back into the water. "I wouldn't have this... have you again if it weren't for her." I smile as I think of the brown haired girl whose enthusiasm and amazing view on life has brought me such a wonderful gift. As I sit and listen to the water splash against the rocks, reminiscing on old times with my friends I hear the breaking of sticks behind me and it pulls me from my memories.

"Lisa." Jisoo soft voice echoes in my ear. I smile, standing up from the creek to turn and look at her. "I'm not sure if you've got something to do, I'm okay staying here all day I just didn't know if you had any—"

"Oh my God!" I gasp as I look down at my watch.

"I'm guessing you had—"

"Lucas!" I interrupt her again. "I was supposed to pick him up from school." I slide back into my shoes in a hurried fashion as both Jisoo and I make our way through the woods to the parking lot. "Ugh! I can't believe I forgot about him."

"How late are you?" Jisoo questions as we reach the parking lot.

I glance down at my watch again. "I'm not yet. I've got ten minutes to get to his school, but I need to drop you off to get your-"

"I'll just go with you." I turn around to look at her. She's smiling this infectious smile.

I shake my head as I try my best not to smile back at her. "You don't have to, you probably got better things—"

"It's not really like you have much of a choice do you?" She pops up her shoulders once, tilting her head to the side. Ugh! Who is this girl and why has she been into my life so abruptly?!

I weigh my options for a moment. If I call my mom and ask her to get him then she'll grill me about where I've been and what I've been doing all day. If I try to make it back to the coffee shop to let Jisoo get her car I'll be late for sure. I mean what's the big deal? It's not like she hasn't met Luke already anyway and he likes her so...

"Stop weighing your options and just get in the car Lisa." I groan, playfully rolling my eyes.

"Fine, get in." I tell the brunette. I unlock the door and she quickly climbs into the passenger seat, buckling her seat belt. I slide into the driver's seat, mimicking her actions before putting the keys into the ignition and driving off.

We make it as soon as the bell rings and I exhale a sigh of relief. I probably broke a couple of laws on the way here but that's neither here nor there.

"There he is." Jisoo points; I look up and see that is indeed my brother. Oh my God! No! "Who is that woman with him?" She asks, waving at my little brother. I groan as my brother and my mother head towards us.

"Great." I mumble under my breath.

"What's great?" Jisoo turns and asks with a look of confusion. She'll understand in a second.

"Lisa what are you doing here?" My mother asks. I lift myself up from the hood of my car, ruffling my little brothers hair before turning to my mother.

"I thought I had to pick Luke up from school today since I dropped him off. I didn't know that—"

"And who might this be?" She turns to Jisoo, a smile planted on her face.

"I'm Jisoo." Jisoo holds out a hand for my mom to shake.

"Ah!" My mom claps her hands together, smiling even bigger than before. "The infamous Jisoo." No no, don't do that mom.

"Infamous?" Jisoo turns to me with a bright smile. I shake my head in utter horror but before I can get out a word my mother chimes in... again.

"Well of course. I've heard so much about you." What! I haven't told my mom a single thing about Jisoo. What is happening right now?

"Is that right?" Jisoo turns and looks at me again. I close my eyes, wishing this moment away.

"Mhm. Lucas here hasn't stopped talking about you since the mall a few weeks ago." My mother says in a tone that causes me to open my eyes and look at her. She's giving me this look I can't really explain. Kind of like 'ha, got you!' That sneaky woman.

"Well this little guy left quite an impression on me as well." Jisoo says sweetly, bending down to kiss my brother on the cheek. He blushes and hides behind our mom's leg.

"I'm glad to finally meet the girl that's been keeping my daughter occupied these past few days." My mother smiles warmly at Jisoo. The sheer truth of her words filling the air. I know my mother wants me to be happy and I think she sees the changes Jisoo is causing in me.

"Well it's been amazing to hang out with your daughter ma'am." I turn to look at Jisoo. She glances at me, flashing me a grin before turning back to my mother.

"Well I should get this little one home." My mom pats Lucas on the back. He whines, swiping her hand away. She chuckles at him, shaking her head. "Jisoo what are you doing this evening?" My mother starts and I already know where this is going. I shake my head as Jisoo opens to answer.

She purses her lips and shrugs. "I don't really have any plans at the moment." Jisoo answers and I don't have to hear what my mom is about to say to know what's coming.

"Would you like to join us for dinner?" Leaves my mom's lips and I roll my eyes. Not that I don't want Jisoo to come over but I mean seriously mom?! You couldn't even let me be the one to ask her?

"Sure." Jisoo answers quickly. My mother smiles and nods, saying a 'good' before she kisses me on my forehead and heads off towards the parked cars to go home and prepare this dinner she just invited Jisoo to.

"I guess you're coming to dinner." I turn to Jisoo and say awkwardly.

She chokes out a laugh, avoiding eye contact. "Yeah. I guess I am." She turns silently, getting back into the car. I close my eyes, soaking in what just happened. Jisoo's coming to dinner. No big deal. I shrug, trying to shake it off.

No big deal my .