"Lisa, Lisa dear." I listen to my mom call to me from the door. I keep my eyes closed, hoping she'll just go away. "Lisa..." She waits to see if I'll awake and answer. When I don't she closes the door behind her. I sigh as I turn over, putting my back to the door. At least this way I don't have to close my eyes when she comes in again. That was the fourth time since this morning that she's come in. The subtle creaking of the door lets me know that she's back yet again. I'm not even sure why I'm pretending to be asleep really. Especially since I haven't slept well for the past four years; whether it be nightmares, late night drills or middle of the night raids, there was always something pulling me from my sleep.

I listen as she stands in the doorway; watching me, before she moves closer. She hovers for a minute, breathing deeply, then disappears back into the hallway she just came from. I know she just wants to find out about my late night last night. The last time I was out that late she got a phone call. A call no parent wants to get. So I know that she's just worried about me. I get it, honestly, I do. But I can't be here and pretend to be normal if she continues to hover like she does.

I grab my phone to check the time completely dismissing the clock that's on my nightstand. I don't know why, but I check to see if have any new messages. I'm not expecting any and I don't have any real reason to receive any but I do. Before I can feel any kind of way about my lack of a social life my door creaks again.

I sigh. "Mom it hasn't even been five minutes since you last came in."

"It's me Li."

I drop my head to the side to see my little brother peaking his head in. My brows furrow in confusion as he sneaks a look behind him. He quickly faces me again and slides his tiny body through the small space he made in the door way. He shuts it quietly and I can't help the small laugh that escapes me.

"Buddy what are you doing?" I sit up leaning on my elbows and watch as Lucas presses an ear against my door. He waves a hand a shushes me.

"Mom told me you were sleeping and not to bother you, so I had to sneak and she's right down the hall." He explains this to me never taking his ear away from the door. He nods once sure that the coast is clear and steps further into my room. He sweeps his brown hair away from his eyes and clasps his little fingers together.

"Hey Li."

"Hey Luke."

"So I have a proposition for you."

Did he just say proposition?

"Why do you know words like proposition, you're seven."

"I read." He shrugs and tells me simply like its the most obvious answer in the world. I'm going to have to take a look at these books he's reading. "As I was saying. I have a proposition for you." He climbs onto my bed and looks me straight in the eyes. I'm a little scared honestly. "So I have some birthday money and I'd like to go the mall and buy some stuff. If you take me, I'll buy you lunch." He smiles widely and I laugh at how adorable my little brother is. I sit up and pull my knees close to my chest. Just out of curiosity I ask. "How much birthday money you got bud?"

"$75" He tells me proudly, pretty impressed with himself, I push my lips out and nod in amazement. I take him up on his proposition simply because its evil to tell this little boy no. I offer to pay for lunch though. It's probably best that I leave my room before my mom checks for a pulse.

I send Luke off to get ready and I close the door behind and I hear my mom whine that she told him not to disturb me. He whines back that he didn't and I smile at the simplicity of my family. Simple is all I can handle right now. Even that I'm not entirely sure I can manage.

I emerge from my room in a loose t-shirt and a pair of skinny jeans. I bounce down the stairs and pop into the kitchen. I kiss my mom on the cheek as I see her baking my favorite dessert. She's honestly the greatest mom anyone could have. I dip my finger in the chocolate batter and off my finger. She swats me away and giggles.

"I didn't hear you come in last night."

I laugh lightly at my mother's start of a conversation. There was no decent segway with that comment.

"Well mom being in the army for four years they really prefer our 'sneaks ins' to be stealthy opposed to boisterous." She laughs softly and shakes her head at my lack of an answer. I honestly don't know what to tell her though. I went to a birthday party of a girl I met at the cemetery, got hit on by her ex girlfriend, met a ton of people I don't care to meet again, only to sneak off when she momentarily left me to mingle with her guests. Yeah, no thanks. So I settle for the next best thing. "I was just around, getting used to being home I guess."

She smiles softly seeming satisfied with the answer and I'm relieved because I had nothing else other than that.

"Ready Li!" Lucas announces as he bursts into the kitchen and grabs my hand pulling me towards the front door.

"Taking Luke to the mall." I explain to my mother. She waves us off as he pulls me out of the room. I laugh as I hear her playfully shout, 'better you than me'. We hop into the car and head out, myself attempting to obtain some form of normalcy. If not for myself at least for my family. They deserve that much.

Two hours in and the statement my mom made before we left makes complete sense now.

"Luke buddy I'm begging you make a decision."

We're in the third video game store for the second time and if I hear one more gamer try to pick me up with the line that I bear a slight resemblance to the most recent Laura Croft from tomb raider I'm gonna break someone's something.

"I'm sorry Li. Its hard." He tells me then pouts and I crumble. Little bugger knows he has me wrapped around his finger. I just shake my head and wave him off. He goes to stare at his choices again. I stand by the entrance hoping that seeing me there will coax him to choose a little faster in fear that I'd leave him. I'm desperate here. I people watch and observe the behaviors of the mall goers. Maybe develop some of their emotional reflexes in case I need references on what normal is. As my eyes scan the crowd my heart stops for a second. For a second I feel like I've seen an older version of Rose. I did. Her mother strolls around the corner and we catch each others eyes. Mine widen in horror and she stares at me momentarily perhaps making sure it's me. A crowd of teenagers cut our stare off short. I take this time to find a place to hide. I look around the video game store and jump behind the life-size cardboard of Laura Croft and snort at the irony.

I crouch down making sure that I still have an eye on my little brother. He's still staring the wall of games and this time I'm begging he is still uncertain on his decision. I peek around the cut out and see if Rose's mom is around. I catch a glimpse of her through the front as she heads towards the store. I look back at Lucas and he's diligently weighing his decisions, my heart is racing as I stare out the window. She's getting closer but I lose her when a pair of legs block my view of her. I groan in frustration and before I can telepathically threaten them to move they step out of my line of sight. I sneak a peak between the hole in Laura's legs and notice a new customer enter the store, but I'm too busy trying to make sure Mrs. Park doesn't see me to catch a glimpse of who it is. Mrs. Park takes a step into the store and my heart stops as she continues to search for me.

"Who we hiding from?" A soft whisper breaks my concentration. I yelp and fall into Laura making her move forward. I groan as I sit up to look at the culprit of my near heart attack and see Jisoo trying not to laugh.

I take a quick peak around Laura and realize that Rose's mom has gone. She must have given up. I slowly stand up and watch as she retreats down the hall.

"You almost gave me a heart attack." I turn back to Jisoo and say.

"Are you avoiding my question?" She pops a brow up, I scoff and step around her.

"No one you would know," I say as I walk towards my indecisive little brother.

"Okay don't tell me then." She jogs a few steps to catch up with me. "I'll just have to guess. So..." She pauses, tapping her chin. "Was she an old teacher?" She asks then turns to gauge my reaction. I keep my face as straight as possible, not giving her anything. "Okay... Was she an ex's mother?" She turns to look at me again and this time I can't keep my face straight. My eyes close as I remember something I told myself to forget. "Lisa." She calls to me. I stop walking, keeping my eyes closed. "I'm sorry I didn't mean to-"

"Was there something you wanted?" I snap, immediately regretting my tone. I take a deep breath and sigh it out. "Sorry." I say, shaking my head. "Luke you almost ready buddy?" I call over to my brother who is now on the other side of the store looking at the PS4 games.

"Yeah, I think I want this one." He says, holding up a game that I don't know. I don't know much about anything these days actually."

"Okay, do you want me to-"

"I got it!" He shouts, digging into his pocket for his money before taking the game and his cash up to the counter to pay.

"Is that your little brother?" Jisoo asks when i turn back to look at her.

"Yeah." I nod, smiling. Luke is really the one thing that's been keeping me going all these years. My mom was told she couldn't have anymore children after me and when Luke came into the picture I just... I don't know. I instantly loved him. He's the most awesome little brother anyone could ask for and I feel bad that I've only seen him once in the past four years. I mean we talk on the phone or skype at least twice a week but I haven't seen him in forever and I feel bad.

"He's really adorable." She smiles and turns on her heels towards the exit. "I guess I'm gonna head out. I just saw you in here and wanted to say hey." She starts towards the exit.

"Luke and I are gonna grab some lunch from the food court, you could um... Join us if you want." She stops walking, turning back towards me.

"Sure." She shrugs and smiles just as my little brother appears next to me.

"Got it." He says, holding up his bag with his game in it.

"What'd you get bud?" I question as we all start towards the exit.

"This really cool game called thief, it's about this guy that... Lisa..." He pauses, looking around me to Jisoo.

"Mhm." I look down to him.

"There's a girl following us." He says, grabbing tightly to my leg. I cant help but chuckle.

"Luke this is Jisoo, I invited her to lunch with us if that's okay with you."

"Hey." Jisoo offers a hand to my brother. He glances up at me then back to Jisoo.

"It's okay." I chuckle out. Seriously, how cute is my little brother?

"I'm Lucas." He smiles, releasing my leg to shake Jisoo's hand.

"Nice to meet you, Lucas." Jisoo returns a smile.

"Are you Lisa's gir-"

"Dont you dare finish that question bud." I bend down, pointing a playfully stern finger at him. His eyes go wide before he smiles and slaps a hand over his mouth. "Go find us a table why don't you." He nods and runs ahead of Jisoo and I to grab a table. I make sure to keep my eyes on him.

"He looks just like you."

"Nah." I shake my head, turning to look at her briefly. "He's much cuter." I turn back to look at my brother and thank goodness he's more decisive about a table than he was about getting a video game. I watch as he waves us down unnecessarily.

"You disappeared last night." Jisoo says softly as we make our way to the table. I sneak a peek at her, she staring at the floor.

"You were off doing your thing, I didn't want to-"

"I'm sorry I invited you knowing that I would have to leave you to go and mingle." She cuts me off. I steal another glance and this time she's looking right at me.

"It's okay, I understand. I was just..." I got nothing right now. I'm trying not to look her in the eyes.

"Did you not really want to be there? You didn't come just because I invited you and you didn't want to be rude, did you?"

"No I wanted to come I just, I haven't really been-"

"It's fine, I get it." Get what? I don't even get what I'm getting at! I'd really like her to explain it me. She shrugs and shakes her head. We've reached the table but neither of us are moving to sit down.

"This is a good table huh Li?" My little brother says, oblivious to what's taking place right now. Hell I don't even fully know.

"I wanted to come to your party Jisoo I just-"

"I guess I just thought we were... That this was... I guess I thought wrong." She shakes her head. "I forgot I'm meeting someone later so I probably should get going." She thumbs towards the escalators.

"Jisoo you don't have to-"

"It was nice meeting you Lucas, maybe we can hang out again some time." She turns to my brother completely ignoring me.

"Aren't you hungry?"

"I gotta get going, maybe next time."

"Okay." Lucas nods and smiles, hopping out of his chair, walking around the table to hug Jisoo's leg. She gasps before bending over to hug him back. "Bye Jisoo."

"Bye Lucas."

"Please, just call me Luke." He waves her off, I give him a look. Who is this little boy right now? Jisoo and I both cant help but smile at his cuteness.

"Okay then, Luke." She gives him once last smile and wave before turning to leave.

"Jisoo..." That's all I manage out. I really don't mind her being here but I'm not entirely sure how to say it.

"I'll see you around Lisa." She offers weakly as if she's unsure of the validity of her own statement. I open my mouth to say something but she starts walking away. I really have no idea what just happened. One second we were fine and the next...

I shake my head as i sit down next to my brother. "Did you and Jisoo have a fight?"

"No buddy we're fine, she just had to leave."

"Oh, okay."

"Luke, why'd you hug her?"

"Mom told me to." He shrugs.

"What do you mean that mom told you to?"

"She said to hug people as much as I can because we never know if we'll ever get to do it again." I stare at my brother for a moment, taking in his innocence. I miss the times when everything was simple, when laughter and joy filled my heart. When spending an afternoon at the mall with people I cared about was something I looked forward to every weekend. "You okay Lisa?" My little brother ask, pulling me from my thoughts.

I breathe out a laugh. I don't really know what I am, but that's no reason to rain on my little brothers fun parade. So I grin and bear it like I've learned to do over the years. "I'm just fine, bud. Just fine." He smiles up at me before we head off to get lunch.