----Chapter Twenty----

Unexpected sounds coming from outside her room drag Chaeyoung out of a rare dreamless sleep. First disoriented, it takes some time for the mist to lift and for her brain to register why she's not asleep anymore.

She groans in her pillow, burying her face deeper into its softness in hopes of drowning whatever mess is happening out there.

Not that the singer isn't used to waking up to various noises, ranging from dogs barking, cats mewling, the girls fighting for the bathroom, or pots clinging in the kitchen, but she recognizes none of those, and a strange feeling takes roots in the pitch of her stomach, awakening her faster than her alarm blaring would.

Hurried footsteps, unintelligible yelling and something crashing on the ground in a loud crack.

The latter makes her sit straight in her bed, heart racing. It's possible one of the dogs smashed something while playing. They sometimes act like hyperactive children, especially when it's a full house. Or when they're following along Lisa's ways, running around and yelping along the sound of her voice like parrots.

She still hurries out of her room, head filled with worries and scenarios straight out of an action movie. She grabs her phone on the way, in case she has to call the cops or the ambulance.

Or hopefully simply take an embarrassing photo of someone in a compromising situation.

She hears the three girls' voice, speaking at a too low volume for her to catch their words, but after treading carefully along the corridor, she finds them gathered in the living room, and she stills at the entrance, frowning at the scene in front of her, thoughts of pictures already forgotten.

There's a broken plate on the floor near the table, abandoned by the girls, with an ensemble of freshly cut fruits spread all over the ground, the sight intriguing the pets who are sniffing and pawing at the forgotten mess.

When they see her, Lisa immediately turns around, but not fast enough to hide from Chaeyoung the pool of tears in her eyes. Jisoo, who was pacing around, stops and looks at her, so many emotions on her face Chaeyoung can't identify them. Distress? Anger? As for Jennie, her face is pale as she fidgets next to Lisa, her fists tightened in frustration on her lap.

"What's going on?"

Jennie and Jisoo share a long look filled with meaning all lost on Chaeyoung which frustrates her further before Jisoo strides to her, enveloping her taller figure in a hug. Chaeyoung automatically returns it although confused, staring at Jennie from above Jisoo's shoulder, but the rapper turns her head away to avoid her eyes.

Before she can comment, or feel hurt by the gesture, Jisoo leads her to the couch and gently forces her to sit.

"There's no point in delaying this... Lisa, stop crying!"

Lisa sniffles, but finally turns around and moves from her spot to take a seat next to Chaeyoung. She takes her hand firmly in hers, but is unable to look at her so she keeps her eyes strained on a mix of red and green gush of fruits near the tv.

All of them are acting so weird. A dark foreboding feeling creeps into her stomach. She suddenly wants to run away from the dorm, from whatever they are about to say. It's nothing good, and maybe she would prefer staying in the dark.

But Chaeyoung straightens her back and focus on Jisoo.

"There was an article online this morning...It...You should read it," she finishes lamely, deposing her phone in Chaeyoung's hands.

Chaeyoung doesn't want to read it, it's obviously an article about her, a bad one too, but she takes the phone from Jisoo's shaking hand.

The title alone is enough for bile to rise in .

Blackpink's Rosé weaken state of mind has her seek out the help of a psychologist for months now

And the article goes into great details to describe how fragile the aftermath of the kidnapping left her, how broken and messed up she is, how often she goes to therapy sessions and how YG 'hid' her condition. It's obvious they were reaching at some parts, but the whole foundation of it is true.

A picture of her leaving the office building of her therapist completes the article, a clear shot of her exhausted face.

Tears stream down her face as she finishes reading, her hands shaking so much Jisoo gently pries the phone away from her grip to discard it somewhere on the couch. Chaeyoung can barely feel the girls around her, Jisoo and Lisa hugging her from both sides while Jennie, now kneeling in front of her, has her chin resting on her knees.

It's not that seeing a psychologist is a bad thing. She knows it's not. They help people daily, and there's no shame in having to see one. She knows this, deep down.

No one was ever supposed to find out.

She never wanted people to know.

She's been bared, thrown powerlessly in front of the whole world, and she hates it. Hates it so much.

"Wh-what are people saying?" Chaeyoung asks in a barely controlled whisper. "And don't say you don't know, Jisoo. I know you read the comments..."

"Blinks are furious about the article, and they want it gone, but it's all over the internet now...but they're leaving positive messages everywhere instead, our fans are so cute. So don't worry, they're on our side. But some other comments...it's- you don't need to know this, Chaeng."

But she can guess without reading them. As if people weren't talking about her enough. It just adds more fuel to their speculations.

Rosé is crazy. Rosé will break down on stage one day. She must be heavily medicated. Maybe she's suffering from Stockholm syndrome and hopes her kidnapper never gets caught. Maybe she's hoping he'll grab her again.

"How did this happen? How did they find out?" Lisa wonders without expecting anyone to hold the answers.

"The list of people who know is short...Us, our managers, the higher-ups at YG...Jimin... anyone else?" Jisoo hesitates over Jimin's name, almost whispering it as if it wouldn't be counted that way. "Your family and friends," she quickly adds.

Chaeyoung shakes her head. Her heart stopped beating at Jimin's name. "I never talked about it with any of my friends. As for my family, only my sister knows. I didn't want my parents to know I needed therapy. I didn't want to worry them."

How great that worked for her. They surely read the article as well. They subscribe to practically all the Kpop news sites in order to keep up with every article that might be about her or her group as well as follow most of her fansites on Twitter and Instagram.

"Maybe it's Choi Sung Hoon, to get revenge." Jennie spits the name out like a curse.

"No way. He may be angry, but he wouldn't ruin us," Jisoo counters. She sounds so sure, Jennie ends up dropping the idea.

"It wouldn't be anyone from our side, her therapist's under oath, so that leaves...Jimin?" Lisa guesses, but she's not convinced. "He wouldn't...right? What if he talked about it with someone else and that someone told someone and-"

"No way," Jisoo stops her firmly. "Let's...not point fingers randomly at people. My money's definitely on Dispatch. They love hating on YG artists, remember? They must've been tailing you, Chaeyoung, ever since you left the hospital in hopes of a juicy story, have persevered all those months, and...yeah," she finishes lamely.

Chaeyoung remains silent through their whole exchange. No matter who was behind it, the damage is already done. She never wanted people to find out about this ever, but now it was out there for anyone to read. No matter that it's her private life. 

It's no one's business.

Her cell in her pocket starts to vibrate with an upcoming call. With slow movements, she takes it out. Eyes closed, she drops it immediately on her lap when she sees Jimin's name on the screen.

"You're not picking up?" Jennie asks her, worried.

"I... I can't right now."

"Chaeng, you-"

Whatever she would've said is interrupted by someone bursting in their dorm in a hurry. Her manager soon appears in the living room, breathless.

"You're wanted at YG, Chaeyoung. Right now."

Feeling empty, Chaeyoung nods and goes to her room to change into a more presentable outfit than her pink-dotted pajamas. Of course they want to see her. She's once again in the middle of a mess.

"We're going too," she hears Jisoo declares as she walks away, her body strangely hollowed but still so heavy.

"Sorry, but only Chaeyoung's presence has been requested," her manager answers loudly, and Chaeyoung thinks she sounds angry. At her?

"So we'll stay in the car."

She doesn't hear the answer as she closes the door of her room. She works on automatic, taking off her pajamas, putting on the most somber outfit she owns. She doesn't bother with makeup.

This nightmare that started all those months ago is never going to end.

It's like she never left that room.

--

Chaeyoung stands in the middle of Blackpink's practice room, b