Jinyoung sighed and eyed his watch. He had been waiting for Mark for about ten minutes now and he still hadn't showed up. Not that he was suprised. This happened more often. Finally he saw a familiar figure enter the little cafe. He scanned Mark's figure. As always, he looked damn good in his oversized sweater and ripped jeans. His heart sped up instantly and he forced himself to calm down, he was still mad at Mark.

Mark dropped himself in a chair at his table. He exhaled slowly.

"Hi" Mark said.

"You're late" Jinyoung remarked "again" he stated coldly.

"Sorry Jinyoung-ah, Jasmine was holding me up" Mark said as he ordered a drink.

"Jasmine" Jinyoung questioned "weren't you together with Isabel"

"Oh, we broke up" Mark said lightly.

"Of course" Jinyoung mumbled.

"What" Mark asked looking back at him.

"Nothing" Jinyoung said waving his hand.

This is how it always went. He didn't know how Mark did it, he didn't know why he did it, but it's just how it went. Mark dated, broke up, and the day after, he'd have a new girlfriend. And he had to watch and suffer in silence.

"What about Jasmine" he asked lightly. Mark's face broke into a smile.

"She's great, you should meet her soon. It's quite funny how we met-" and there Jinyoung stopped paying attention.
~
He had agreed to study with Mark today. But per usual, Mark hadn't showed up at the agreed time. This time though, he'd been waiting for a while. That is, longer than usual.
Suddenly his phone started ringing. He quickly picked up.

"Hey, Jinyoung-ah?" Mark asked.

"Yes. Where are you" he cut straight to the point"

"I'm sorry, but I can't make it today" he heard Mark say. He sighed. What a suprise.

"No, that's okay'' he said quietly.

"Are you sure" Mark asked. Jinyoung nodded only to realise Mark couldn't see him.

"Jinyoung?" Mark asked.

"Yes, yes. It's fine" he said quickly.

"You were nodding, weren't you" Mark asked teasingly, and Jinyoung could perfectly picture the little grin that was now spreading across Mark's face.

"Whatever" he laughed out "just go and have fun with Jasmine" he said. Mark didn't have to tell him for him to know where he was.

"Thank you, I owe you one. Bye" Mark said and he hung up.

"You owe me more than just one" Jinyoung sighed out as he dropped his phone on the table. He dropped his forehead on his arms and closed his eyes. Every time. And he just had to take it, because Mark was his friend. Maybe, if he didn't love him this much, he wouldn't have accepted it anymore. But he did love him, more than was good for him.

The thought of Mark still made him smile. He couldn't understand this behaviour, but the rest of Mark was like an open book to him. They were best friends and Jinyoung was proud to say so. Sometimes sad, but mostly proud. Still it annoyed him that he couldn't figure him out right now, just when he needed it most.

He looked back at his book. Math. Usually Mark would be there to explain the equations he didn't get, but that hadn't been the case for a while now. He threw his book shut and got up to leave. He decided to go back home. When he got home the entire place was dark.

Friday night. Even his parents were out. Usually he would eat out with Mark. How long had he been with Jasmine now, a week? Record breaker.

Maybe this one would last.

It was the only thing he could think about. What if it would last. What if it ended up to be meant to be this time. What if. He sighed and dropped himself on the couch. If he were to lose Mark anyway, maybe now was the time. He was used to him being away anyway. He put his head on his hands and sighed again. 

What he wouldn't do for Mark. He chuckled emotionlessly. It wasn't funny in any way, but very true in every single possible one. He would let him be happy, if this is what he wanted. He would be able to let him go. He would. Would he? He got up to make himself food. He ate in silence and then dropped himself back on the couch.

He looked at his phone, hesitated to send Mark a text, and then dropped it again. Mark was out, no need to be worried, no need to bother them. He the tv and scrolled through the channels, without really noticing them. Time flew by as he aimlessly scrolled trough his social media and tried to read a book, with emphasis on tried.

It was around midnight when suddenly the bell rang. He didnt expect his parents back this night, they would stay at friends, so he couldn't think of anyone that would ring the doorbell at this time. He dragged himself off the couch and towards the door. Silently over thinking how this might be a very bad idea, he opened the door.

In front of him was Mark. He could see tears in his eyes and he looked tired. All in all not in the least like he knew him. A million questions ran through his mind, but he decided to not ask any. He knew Mark didn't want him to ask now, not yet. He quickly slipped into his shoes and grabbed a jacket. He closed the door behind him and started walking. Soon Mark started following him. 

Without saying anything Jinyoung went to get coffee and then took Mark to the place they used to come together. A huge old tree at the edge of a forest. They used to climb it when they were younger, but now they usually just sat there and enjoyed the weather. He dropped himself on the damp forest ground and Mark fell down next to him. Mark lightly sipped his coffee, starting to look a little better.

"Want to tell me about it" he carefully asked. Mark looked up at him.

"We broke up" Mark said. Jinyoung nodded, but he could see that was not the main reason Mark was like this. Usually Mark took breakups extremely lightly. Not that that was a good thing, but this was just the complete opposite. There had to be something else.

"Are you okay" he asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine" Mark answered. He sipped his coffee again. Deep down, and he knew he shouldn't, he felt happy. Happy that they broke up, so that finally he got to spend some time with Mark. They drank their coffee in silence. When they were done they returned to Jinyoung's home. Reaching the door, he turned back to Mark.

"Can I stay over tonight" Mark asked quietly. Jinyoung looked at him.

"Of course you can" he answered. He opened the door and let Mark in. They took off their shoes and went upstairs, Mark automatically finding his way to Jinyoung's room. He dropped himself on Jinyoung's bed and Jinyoung smiled a little.

"Are you tired" he asked. Mark groaned a little.
"I'll take that as a yes" Jinyoung chuckled out.

He went into the bathroom to change and quickly wash his face. He came back to tell Mark that he could borrow clothes, only to find him already asleep. He walked towards him.

He moved him a little and covered him with the blanket. He lowered himself to look at Mark's face. He slowly traced his fingers through Mark's hair. He sighed.

"Why do you keep hurting yourself like this" he sighed out still Mark's hair "every single time this happens. And you just start all over again. You know that I'll always be there for you right, I'll never leave, like they do every time." He whispered "can't I be enough. Can't you just be with me and be happy" a little tear slipped from his eye and he quickly wiped it away. He got up and slipped into the other side of the bed.

He stared up at the ceiling. He would always be there to catch him, but Mark couldn't see that.  He turned to his side, his back towards Mark. How long could he still take it. How long until he finally snapped and burst out at Mark. He couldn't do that, wasn't able to hurt him ever, but it was inevitable. One day he would snap, and he felt like that day was coming close and closer.

Suddenly he felt an arm being thrown around him. Mark pressed his body closer to his and snuggled his nose in his neck. 

"Thank you" Mark mumbled in his neck "for always being there for me" he continued. Jinyoung was about to say something but Mark started talking again.

"I'm sorry" he quietly said "for leaving you like that and thinking you would be okay. I'm sorry for not considering your feelings and only thinking about ways to cover up mine" he said. Jinyoung frowned, where on earth was this going.

"I'm sorry for trying to hide stuff by doing things that even disgust me. But I just couldn't accept it because I was afraid of how you'd react" he continued.

"Mark what are you talking about" he asked.

"I love you" Mark said. Jinyoung stiffened "But I couldn't admit it so I started dating girl after girl, thinking that that would help" he admitted.

Mark had done all of this to cover up his feelings for him, Jinyoung, his best friend. He turned around to face Mark. Their noses touched slightly.

"You're really stupid aren't you" he said while smiling. Mark smiled too.

"I am, but it just seemed like the best solution" he said sheepishly "so we're good?" He asked. Jinyoung frowned again. So Mark thought this wouldn't affect him in any way, that they would stay friends. He couldn't just throw this chance away now. But he could  a little.

"What do you mean" Jinyoung asked. 

"So we're still friends and you don't hate me now" Mark explained.

"I do hate you" Jinyoung said throwing an arm around Mark too. Their noses were still touching but Mark backed away a little.

"You do" Mark asked hurt. Jinyoung nodded.

"I hate you, because you thought I wouldn't accept you, because you left me hanging every time, because you didn't explain, and I hate you most because you think we can still be friends after this" he explained. Mark's face fell even more.

"But I thought-" Mark started.

"You shouldn't think so much" Jinyoung smiled at him.

"What are you getting at" Mark said now getting frustrated. Jinyoung smiled widely at him and got a little closer. Their noses touched again and Mark's eyes went wide.

"Why would I want to be your friend" he said and he paused a little to see Mark's reaction "when I could very well be your boyfriend" he softly continued.

"What? You would want that. Because I don't think you would, have you seen how many girls I broke up with" Mark said in a rush.

"That's one thing I'm curious about, why did they break up with you" he asked their noses still touching. Mark smiled mischievously.

"Because I kept talking about you" he admitted.

"Why would you do that" Jinyoung laughed out.

"Because I kinda like you a lot" Mark said turning a little red. 

"Well I like you a lot too" Jinyoung cheekily admitted. Mark's eyes went wide again.

"Why are you so suprised" Jinyoung asked with a chuckle.

"Well, it's just, you're my friend, and you're a guy, and-" Mark stuttered.

"So" Jinyoung remarked.

"I just didn't expect this okay" he defended.

"Me either" Jinyoung said. Mark backed away a little and caressed his face with a finger. He traced along Jinyoung's cheeks. 

"Beautiful" he whispered. Now it was Jinyoung's time to blush.

"You know, I never kissed any of this girls" he said "couldn't do it" he said with a little hollow smile.

"Can I kiss you" Mark asked. Jinyoung smiled at him.

"You don't have to ask" he said. Mark immediately closed the gap between their lips. It was a soft kiss but to Jinyoung it seemed to last forever. When he finally pulled away they were both out of breath. Mark smiled at him.

"I really didn't expect this" he said. Jinyoung laughed and turned around again and snuggled a little closer to him. Mark tightened his arm around him and soflty kissed the back of his neck.

"I love you" Mark whispered.

"And I love you, heartbreaker" Jinyoung said with a small laugh.
~
They were walking through town hand in hand. Well not really. Jinyoung was wearing an oversized sweater in which his hands dissapeared so that no one could see their linked little fingers. Just one finger, but they had to be careful. Mark looked at him and smiled.

"Mark" they suddenly heard someone yell. They turned around to see a pretty girl with long dark hair.

"Jasmine" Mark said. She came a little closer.

"So this is Jinyoung" she asked. Mark nodded.
"He's told me a lot about you" she said now directing her attention towards Jinyoung. Another girl appeared next to them.

"Who is this" she asked, protectivly putting a hand on Jasmine's shoulder.

"These two here are Mark and Jinyoung" she said turning towards the second girl "You know the guy I told you about. No need to worry babe" she said. The word repeated in Jinyoung's head. Babe. Mark sometimes called him that, but he just found it strange.

"So you're finally together" Jasmine asked.

"And so are you" Mark said with a smile. Jasmine smiled too.

"I guess you could say this happened because of you, so I should thank you" she said.

"I should thank you too" Mark said. Jasmine extended her hand towards Jinyoung. He took it and lightly shook it.

"I'm Jasmine, and this is Yuri" she said "my girlfriend" she added softly. Jinyoung smiled at her.

"Nice to meet you" he asnwered as he shook Yuri's hand too.

"Maybe we should go on a date together sometime" Yuri proposed. Jinyoung looked at Mark and smiled. Mark chuckled.

"Yeah that would be nice" Mark said as he fully grabbed Jinyoung's hand.