Lol this is sucha sick poster xD Jay's so badboy in this pic :) Thanks @dglove25<3

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      I woke up with an intense pounding sensation in my head and I grimaced when I moved. Damn, hangovers . I sat up and looked and I flipped . Why am I wearing Jay’s shirt? I look over to see Jay, shirtless lying next to me and suddenly parts of last night rushed back to me. The scene where he ripped my clothes off popped into my head and I jumped up out of bed to get away, only to collapse to the floor. My knees are way too weak :o

            The noise work him up and he rubbed his eye at me. “What’re you do- are you okay>” he asks me, getting up and offering me a hand. I slapped it away.

            “Did we- did we have last night?” I ask him. I hope we hadn’t. I felt my life crash down on me. I completely ed up my relationship with my parents, I lost my ity to my own ‘brother’, and I got drunk as hell and had with Jay Park. Although I shouldn’t mind the last part, it bothers me. A lot more than I thought it would. I wanted to remember my first time with him.

            He shrugs. “You wanted to,” he tells me, laying back down on the bed. I felt a blush creep onto my cheeks and I wanted to disappear >_< He probably thinks I’m a drunk.

            “Oh,” I say lamely. “…Why didn’t we?”

            He was silent for a moment. “I want to make love when you’re not drunk.”

            “Oh,” I say again, feeling like an idiot. But then his words registered and I knew what he meant. He wanted me to be sober enough so I can actually remember how good it feels to be under him. “Do you think my parents will come looking for me?”

            “No, I don’t think so. I mean, isn’t this the most rebellious thing you’ve ever done or something?” he asks me, getting up and pulling on a pair of Nike sweats and a T-shirt. I watched in amazement at how gorgeous his body is. His biceps and triceps flexed with minute movements, his abs toned and his shoulders and chest were broad. I like imagining laying his arms, protected from all this crazy bs happening in my life.

            “I guess,” I say. And after a long moment of thought I summoned the courage to say, “I think it’d be best for me to go back to California.”

            I look at Jay, waiting for an answer. “Kimmie, you do love me, right?” he asks me awkwardly. I nod slowly and unsure of myself. I mean, I do love him. But where is he getting at? “Then stay.”

I didn’t know what to say. 

            “Why?” I ask him.

            “Because,” he says. I frown.

            “Really, I have to go,” I tell him. “My parents are going to hate me forever if I stay.”

Jay strides over to me and puts his hand under my chin. He lifts my face up to his.

            “I don’t think anyone can ever hate you,” he whispers. Incoherent and thoughts that made no sense flooded into my head, capacity overflowing.

            “Do you love me then?” I whisper back. I look into his eyes and sensed himself being hesitant. He’s never going to say it. Does he even feel it? I turn my head away from him and grabbed some clothes to change into after my shower.

            I got out of the shower and looked at myself through that wall mirror. I shake my head at myself.

            After I dressed I went back to the room to pack my things up. Jay was in his studio. I could hear the music blare, even through the walls. one look I traded god for eyes, what do I do. cause she’s a demon.  I’ll trade it all even my soul. cause she’s a demon. I said I had to let this go.  no sense in burning for eternity.

            Demon? Is this song about me :o I shook my head to clear up my head and continued to pack up my bags. I went to the studio and knocked on the door, hoping he’d hear my knocking over the music. He does.

            “You’re leaving now?” he asks me.

            I nod. “I have a cab waiting outside.”

            “Oh,” he says. “I’ll see you around?”

            I bite my tongue from screaming at him. Doesn’t he know that I’m so in love with him it ing hurts?! I don’t have a choice but to leave. If I could stay I would. My old man will wipe the floor with my if he catches me hanging around here. Plus my break is over and Stanford is waiting. And Rian scares the out of me. The thing that’s driving me away the most is the fact that Jay’s never told me he’s loved me. “Sure,” I say, sweetly. I turned my back to him and let myself out.

            It’s raining hard. The snow’s been melting since the weather’s been bipolar. “Damn,” I mutter. Where’s the cab?! Curse the ice and rain -__-

            I don’t know, but subconsciously I was praying Jay would come out here and tell me how much he loves me. I’d die. But the cab finally pulled up and he doesn’t appear. And I don’t think he will either.

            The cab driver popped the trunk open and I threw my luggage in there and tried to fit my carry on in the back too, since it was wet and I didn’t want a wet bag sitting next to me in the car :b after much effort I finally got it to fit and slammed the trunk shut.

            I made my way to the door, getting wet from the pouring rain. I looked back at the apartment one last time, a minuscule part of me still hoping Jay would come for me. Nothing. I got into the car and told the driver to drive.

            I was checking my iPod when we turned the corner out of the complex. The driver stepped on the brakes, making me drop my iPod. “Hey,” I say, annoyed. I looked up to see Jay standing in front of the car, his hands on the hood.

            This reminds me of when I stopped him in his car. I got out of the car and the cab driver was yelling something at me, but I didn’t hear. My heart was beating so loud against my rib cage and the rain was pelting the asphalt.

            “Kimmie, don’t go,” Jay says, taking my wrists. The driver was still shouting for me to get back in, the fare is still running. Jay shuts the door and the shouting stopped.

            “I can’t stay,” I tell him. The rain slicked his hair down to his forehead. He looked so desperate. You know how in movies it’s so romantic when they’re in the rain, hugging or kissing or whatever? It’s not as romantic as it seems. It’s cold and there’re people who drive by and stare at us like ‘what the ’. “Give me reason. Right now. Why I should stay.”

            “Reasons?” he repeats.

            “Yes. Reasons. 10 reasons. Now.”

            “Um.” He takes a step back and I watch as his eyes wandered from my face to the ground and then to the sky. “I need you. I love your cooking. You make me laugh. You’re smart and you can help with math. I love waking up and smelling the crook of your neck. I like your mom. I hate your brother. I’ll protect you from him. And I’ll always be with you,” Jay tells me.

            “That’s only 9,” I tell him.

            “Kimmie, we’re soaked. Please, drop it. And come inside,” he tells me. I shake my head violently.

            “One more reason,” I persisted.

            “Fine! I love everything about you. You’re stubborn, you’re smart, funny, beautiful-“

And he pauses for a moment. There was nothing more in the world I wanted to do then get out of the rain. I was soaked to the bones and freezing >.<

“And I love you. Now get your suitcases and get back into the house. I’ll take care of the rest.”

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Hellooo you guys. I've finally updated :D i've been so busy with school. i hate it. I need summer to come. like now. Gahhh. Minnesota smh. It's too icy and snowy outside for me to go running :c so i had to run the mile last week and I swear to god I thought I was going to die >.< i got 8 minutes :l By the 7th lap i was like... crawling xD lol. I've been IN LOVE with Wooyoung <3 him and Jay :) Thinking about writing a fanfic about Wooyie? ;) Yessss.

Anyway hope you guys liked this chap. i thought it was pretty cute lol. Hmm i gtg do hw now o.e byeee guys.

@iloveswissrolls~~~~ lolol yesss<3

@raingodess424 ~~~ Hahaha Jay is sucha cutie(: and hmm, idk yet man. I guess you’ll have to wait and see;)

@dglove25 ~~~ hkasjlhf one of my life dreams is to meet him. Or just see him on the side of the street or something lol.

@nami5589 ~~~ hiiii. You’re viet too? :D ahfkd lol xD he’s a player. The ladies can’t get enough of him man ;)

@borrrill~~~ I bet he has a high level of self restraint in real life(: