Such a complicated mess. Seungri was about to lock the door after entering his room but Jiyong was quicker and managed to get inside before the younger could do it. “Leave me alone.” “No, I know it's complicated for you but I won't leave you alone with all this. You always got me.” Jiyong wrapped his arms around his boyfriends waist and pressed him against his own body tightly. “You don't know anything!” Seungri yelled and freed himself from the embrace pushing Jiyong away who stumbled a bit backwards. “My life is a ing mess and I don't want to deal with all this anymore. I hate it! I hate how everything goes wrong.” Tears rolled down his cheeks and he turned around so Jiyong wouldn't see them even though the almost quiet sobs could be heard.

He walked to his bed and sat down on it hiding his face in his hands. “They love you and we can be together. It's also not that easy for me suddenly having a father whose also the father of my boyfriend.” “He's not my real father and she's not my real mother.” “Even though you're adopted you are their son. They love you so much and even though they aren't your own flesh and blood they are still your parents. It's not about being related but about being loved and raised by them.” The words sounded right but still Seungri was confused and felt lonely. All of a sudden something missed in his heart. Of course he loved his parents especially his mother since she was way more caring than his strict father but still he loved them both. Though now he felt betrayed since they had never told him before. Also real parents always seemed to be different than not being related to them.

Seungri lay down on his bed and stared at the ceiling. “Will you lie down next to me?” He asked. Jiyong smiled since they would finally cuddle and wrapped his arms around the warm body. “I missed this.” The older whispered. “Me too.” “Now we can do that forever without having to worry about being brothers.” “Yeah.. because I'm adopted.” “Sorry.. let's not think about that for now, alright? Let's just cuddle and relax.” He couldn't stop thinking about it which is why he also couldn't relax even though being hugged like this felt nice. “Try to sleep, love. Tomorrow it will be easier to think about everything.” Jiyong pecked Seungri's head and pulled the blanket on top of their bodies. Even though they didn't change clothes or got ready in the bathroom it was the best to sleep now and do the rest tomorrow since it had been an exhausting day.

The panda didn't sleep well which is why he woke up in between and was extremely tired the next morning as he woke up at 5am again. He snuggled closer to Jiyong who still slept safe and sound. Once again he thought about everything that happened and sighed quietly since it was a serious matter. His parents had lied to him all these years and he had no idea if they would have ever told him about it without the brother matter. He wondered how his life would be like now if they hadn't adopted him. Who were his real parents? What life did they live? Why did they put him up for adoption? Would he have met Jiyong if they hadn't adopted him? All these questions created a big chaos in his mind and he couldn't find the answers.

The hand that rested on his head caressed hi