Green = Past

Black = Present

Bold = hangul

Chapter Fourteen

Jiyong POV

Jiyong couldn't keep his eyes off the photo album. As Dara would share stories behind the photos, he never once unglued his eyes from the photo and he secretly wished the picture would move showing him what Dara is talking about.

After the third photo album, he was done. It was where Jay was present in the photos already. He didn't want to see anymore. He was having a hard time looking at the photos because it made it more obvious that he has been absent and not even missed. Now with Jay around there’s even more photos of them together for different occasions while he only has today. It may have been a lot of photos but it still doesn’t make up the four years he wasn't around.

"Jiyong." Dara breathed out as soon as Jiyong closed the photo album while she was talking. She was specifically making sure she was ignoring Jay's photos with Jinnah. She already saw the change in his expression when Jay started to show up in the albums.

"I still can't wrap my head around this." Jiyong said. He gripped on the edges of the album refusing to look at Dara. He wasn't sure what he felt. He was mad at himself for not fighting for Dara back then, if he did then maybe this wouldn’t have happened. He was angry at Dara for running away and not giving him a benefit of a doubt that he'd always chose her no matter what. Being faced with this reality he can't look her in the eye... His reason to come to New York had slipped once he found out that Jinnah existed.

In moments like this he should want to be with Dara even more and complete this family but when he looks at Dara it reminds him that Dara took away his chance to be a father to Jinnah. Four years that could never be returned and he is angry about that.

"I don't want to miss any more Dara. I want to be in her life. I can't—" Jiyong's voice broke. He didn't want to be emotional now.

"I understand Jiyong. And I don't know how many times I should say I'm sorry for choosing this decision. I thought I did the right thing but never thought of the consequences." Dara sincerely apologized. She'd probably kneel and beg for it if he'd make her.

"But this isn't going to be simple Dara... You two have lives here in New York. My life is still in Korea." He put the photo album on the table and was finally able to look at her in the eye. The inevitable talk is here. "This isn't an easy flight, like Japan." He could see Dara flinch when Japan was mentioned because it was obvious who was in Japan. He still has yet to tell her about his divorce and he can’t bring it up without confusing Dara because even he doesn't know what he wants.

"I know." She replies. They both know how complicated this is. The flight alone takes a day almost and she isn't even sure if she wants to go back to Korea.

"But I am going to be adamant about one thing, I will be a part of her life. Despite the distance I want to be there for her. I'll come to whatever events she needs me. I want to be able to talk to her anytime she needs me." He said with such conviction that Dara was startled at first because he wasn't just Jiyong but G-dragon.

"Of course. You can start tomorrow. I'll call the school and tell them you’re picking Jinnah up. You can do that all week just so you can spend the most time you can with Jinnah while you are here..." She was mostly talking to herself trying to resolve the issue at hand even though it's not truly enough but she's doing her best.

"Dara," he said but she just kept going totally not paying any attention.

"I have some things I need to do in the studio this week so you and Jinnah can spend time together as long as you want. She has a spare key, so you can head straight here…" She clears realizing that Jiyong has a hotel room too. "I mean, she can also stay with you. I can pack a few things for her and—"

Jiyong couldn't take it anymore. He grabs Dara by her shoulder and wraps his arms around her for a hug. It wasn't anything special more like just to make her calm down and breathe since she was speaking too fast probably forgetting to breathe.

"I—" she stutters. She had her hands on her chin because it was such a swift movement she didn't know what had just happened. Her forehead was leaning on his chest.

He just lightly pats her back. He wasn't sure what to do next but he normally does this when Dara panics too much about things.

"Jiyong," she mumbles awkwardly. It was because she wasn't really in a most comfortable position at the moment.

"Thank you." He said.

She slightly pushes off and he obliged letting her go. She sits up straight and eyes him carefully since she was confused. "What? Why?"

He takes a deep breath and slightly brushes the stay hair off her face tucking it on her ears. His fingers lingered at the back of her neck, "Because you raised such a beautiful, happy and amazing child."

She blinked unable to register what was going on still. She's slowly trying to process everything. He just thanked her. She never expected him to say this at all. If he says he'd hate her forever then she's totally understand. She couldn't really respond. She wasn't sure what to say.

He was thankful she stayed quiet because he wasn't done. "Despite raising her alone,"

"Jiyong, you shouldn’t—"

He tightened the hug that her words were muffled by her being startled again. "Let me finish." He sighed. He waited until he felt her nod on his chest, he continues. "I'm not saying that I forgive you for keeping her from me,” His voice was so low he wasn't sure if she heard him but it he said it anyways because it was the truth.

She remained stiffened in his harms and she slightly nods her head.

"But, despite that Dara. You raised her as if she didn't have anyone missing in her life.” Even if it hurts for him to say this that it seemed like Jinnah didn’t need him at all these past few years but he is still thankful that Jinnah didn’t seem lonely for not having a father. He can remember how Daehyun was with him, as much as he does try to be there for Daehyun there is still that missing thing that he couldn’t give Daehyun fully. And now, being with Jinnah he feels that he can be that father that Jinnah could be proud of.

“You may not want to hear this Jiyong but I am truly sorry about all of this. If given another chance I would so do this differently.” She relaxed a bit and this time leaned on his chest allowing him to hold her tightly. “I really am sorry.” She repeated softly.

He lets out a sigh and nods. “I know.” He slightly pulls her away from him but just enough that he’d be gazing into her eyes. He lightly brushes the hair off her face, and his fingers lingered on the back of her neck while his free hand was wiping a tear that had fallen from Dara’s eye. He wanted nothing but to take out the loneliness in her eyes when he knows that he is the one doing it. “Just give me time Dara.”

“Okay.” She whispered and closed her eyes. Looking into his eyes was hurting her too much that she had to look away. That’s when she froze again when she felt his breath on her lips.

He didn’t even remember when he leaned, or if she did. All he knows is that his nose was already touching hers and if he moved that inch then their lips would touch. As much as he wanted to, he knew that this is how this isn’t right.

With the needed strength to let her go, he had finally moved away. He clenched his fist together ignoring that tingling feeling in the tip of his fingertips that had protested for being away from her touch. “I should probably head back to the hotel.”

She let out a sigh of relief as she still didn’t move from her spot. Her eyes were still closed.

This was when Jiyong realized that he had this much power over Dara. The moments when they’d always end up in bed because of their fight or their overwhelming feelings for each other. It’s always because of him. When he’d kiss her, she’d melt into his touch not caring about anything else. As if they were the only ones in the world. This was the same for him too but at least if he wouldn’t do anything then nothing would happen. She always waits for him despite the fact that she is the one that pushes him away every time…

He gets up from the couch and clears his throat since she still hasn’t moved.

She finally looks up at him and nods. “I’ll call you tomorrow and what time you should pick up Jinnah.”

He smiles at her. “I would love that.”

“Good night, Jiyong.” She said she returns the smile. The smile was a secret thank you for not making her make the same mistake again, since she thinks that he is still a married man.

“Good night, Dara.”

It was almost five minutes till school was being let out when Jiyong had pulled up the school's driveway. There were about seven cars ahead of him.

He would have arrived sooner too but it took him longer because he had to buy a booster seat for Jinnah and he had to decide which one she would like the best. It also took him a bit to figure out how to attach the dang thing.

He heard bell that came from the school which means that it was time for the kids to finally go home.

He took a deep breath unsure what to do now. He never really had the chance to pick up Daehyun from a school setting because Kiko thought it best to homeschool him, he didn't really start to go to an actual school till this school year. It took a lot of convincing from him to tell Kiko that it's better to have Daehyun interact with kids his age since he is already quite a timid person. So they only had started this year, it did help overcome the kid’s shyness… Jiyong isn’t even there to see the bigger progress.

Oh and it doesn't really help that he only comes to Japan during the weekends so there’s no school on those times, and if he did come home on the weekdays it was always best to surprise him at home. Plus also the fact that his car had the booster seat in it already that Kiko put in, so yeah.

He had already seen a lot of the kids by the gate probably getting ready to get out. Dara had just texted him that she already called the school to inform them about his car and his plates. So he didn't need to worry about getting out of the car to pick Jinnah up. She also mentioned that she had told Jinnah that he was picking her up.

The cars were slowly moving forward and the next thing he knew he was already in front of the gate with Jinnah standing there patiently waiting for the go signal to be able to out head to the car.

He waves particularly to no one forgetting that he couldn't be seen because the windows was slightly tinted. He was a nervous wreck and he didn't know why. Maybe because it was the first time that he's alone with Jinnah. It was like he was trying to impress her as if it was a first date. He hadn't felt this way since he finally took the risk and decided to confess to Dara after months of trying to just let it go...

"Like mother like daughter..." He chuckled to himself, amused.

Jinnah was anxiously looking at the car the teacher was pointing her to go too, she wasn't sure if she should go to the car or not since it was a vehicle she's never seen before.

And once again he mentally complemented Dara's parenting skills. She indeed raised a beautiful, strong and intelligent girl.

So in return, he rolled down his window. And when Jinnah saw him at the driver's seat, her smile of excitement brought on a swell of fullness in his heart. It was quite an odd feeling because for the longest time he has always thought there was an emptiness in his heart that he though was never going to be filled... Yet this little girl's smile had made him feel too happy he might burst.

"Daddy!" She waves back and then she calls someone from behind her as if she was saying goodbye.

The teacher that Jinnah was talking to was staring at Jiyong with agape as if she was shocked to see that it was indeed Jinnah's father that was picking her up but then when he smiled at the teacher with a slight nod as greeting. He could see the change in the teacher's face as if she was blushing hard rather obviously almost close to hyperventilating...

Then he knew it was already a different reaction and he's seen it a lot of times before. She was a fan of either G-dragon or Bigbang.

"Hi, daddy." Jinnah opening the car door took off his concentration. If she was indeed a fan it doesn't matter anymore. She can ogle all she wants and calculates that he's the father and Dara being the mother. He doesn't care because the only thing that matters is the little girl that had just entered the car.

"Hey, baby girl." He greeted back, he turns his head to give her a reassuring smile, waiting for her get settled in her seat. Dara had already told him that she can buckle herself in and would rather do it herself.

She gave him a big toothy smile and before sitting she leans forward and gives him a big wet kiss on his cheek. "I'm glad you came and picked me up!"

Jiyong cleared his throat, he was caught off guard by that simple action. With Daehyun he wasn't really affectionate towards him, so now he remembers why he's always wanted a girl. "Are you buckle up?" He asks.

Jinnah has just sat down on the booster seat and was searching through the seat belts. Carefully pairing it with the right buckles. "In a second."

Jiyong was just patiently watching her carefully, making sure she was doing the belts properly. Dara said that Jinnah always wants to do things on her own as much as possible. It apparently annoys her when someone treats her like a baby.

Once again, this is how he was when he was a child. One of his early memories were of him doing things he thinks he knows and how these would get him into so much trouble because he’d always end up breaking things or worse cut off a huge chunk of his hair.

“All done!” Jinnah declared in excitment when she was finally able to do the last buckle of the seat. She clapped, realizing how proud she was of herself.

He gave a last look making sure she did it right and when he reached over to pull on the belts, he nods. “Okay, where do you want to eat?” he asked since this was apperently the routine before they would head home.

She smiles and says a resturant n