(Irene's POV) 

My heart still hurt. 

I couldn't believe it when she said that she wanted to break up with me, or a break if that's what she said. But what's the difference? I begged, I cried, I pleaded her to stay. But she was heartless. 

Nobody stayed in my life. Even my best friend. Tiffany was always busy and no one was there for me when I needed someone to talk to. I can't talk to Taehyung anymore because even though we said we would stay friends, he still had his own choice. I understood it.

I felt so alone, so empty. 

Until Seulgi came into my life 3 months ago.

I was really happy, beyond bliss, when she stepped into my life and decided to be a huge part of it. I didn't want to lose her. I only had Seulgi. Seulgi was all that I had. 

Being needy and clingy was not what I wanted but I could not stop myself every time she was with someone else or mentioned just anybody else. I tried to be more opened about it but I really could not do it. 

The thought of Seulgi leaving me one day made me sick to my stomach. 

I felt threatened whenever she talked about some other girls. I knew what they wanted. My instinct was right. I hated my over-possessiveness but I just wanted Seulgi all by myself. I certainly did not want to share. 

She did not even ask about how I would feel if she worked with her ex girlfriend and also, with a girl who liked her as well. How could I be so okay with it? 'Yeah sure, go and have fun at your work, I will be waiting for you at home' ? 

No. If someone else was in my shoe, she would have done the same as well. 

I knew that I cried very easily. I was just very emotional. 

I finally felt things after 25 years, how could I not be overwhelmed? 

She made me cry very easily. Her little action. Her words. Her everything. She made me feel touched, always. But sometimes, I cried because I was so scared, so scared of losing her. She was rather hard to read. Even though she was always honest with me, I still could not help but think that how could someone be so honest? There must be some twisted truth behind it. 

The way she would always smile regardless of what she was feeling made me clench my jaws because I could not know her real emotion. Except when she was jealous, but she was scary when she was jealous. I still liked it. I loved all of her. 

Now that we were taking a break, I had no one to call and talk to. The only person I had been so used to sharing my day with was gone. 

I stared at her name in our conversation. She was online. 

Who was she talking to? 

My silly heart was being silly again for I waited for her to type something until she eventually went offline. After an hour. I had been staring at her name for an hour. 

I felt sick. 

Forget about work. I certainly did not have the mood to go to work anymore. I came home immediately after our argument, calling in sick. Heart sick. 

That night, I lay on my bed wishing that Seulgi was beside me, hugging me to sleep and kissing me randomly because she had not fallen asleep. But all I got was the cold air that wrapped around me. 

Just like that, it had been a week.

A week of not seeing or talking to her. My one-week leave was up. Who would have thought that I would be spending my one-week leave crying at home when I planned to spend it with her? 

"Hey Irene, are you feeling better?" Suho asked me. I did not want to talk to anybody at all. Everything made me feel sick. I just gave him a forced smile and he nodded before he left my cubicle. 

I was typing halfway when Bogum appeared behind me, tapping my shoulder. "Want to have lunch at the coffee house later?" 

I knew they were trying to cheer me up. But nobody could, except her. 

I shook my head. Seulgi was not there anymore anyway. She should be starting school now. Her holiday had ended too. 

"Alright. See you at lunch later then." Bogum smiled and left. I stared at the screen until my eyes ached because of the bright screen. I rubbed my eyes and decided to get myself some coffee. 

I felt so dead. 

"Unnie, you're back." Momo hugged me quickly when she saw me at the lounge. She was the new girl that I talked about. If only Seulgi was still here to listen to me. I returned a hug back and smiled at her. "Coffee?" She asked me. I nodded and she took my cup to prepare coffee for me. I just watched her quietly as she did so. "Done." She grinned and passed my cup to me. "Are you feeling okay?" 

"Yeah. Just... a little tired." I sighed. 

"What happened?" She asked, her face looked really concerned but I would think that she was doing it for the sake of asking. 

I shrugged and sipped my coffee. "Thanks for the coffee." I patted her arm and walked back to my cubicle. 

I was only waiting for the day to end just so that I could escape from reality again. I no longer had something to look forward to at night. A week had been tough. I thought through so much and read some stuffs online. The definition of failed relationship was broad. Every relationship has its own problem. Ours was my insecurity. 

My father was upset when he noticed that I had been feeling down. But I lied to him and said that Seulgi went to an overseas trip with her family so we did not meet. In the end, he just assumed that I missed Seulgi a lot. Which was true. I did not want him to know that Seulgi suggested a break because he would really kill Seulgi. 

I would sit on my bed at night after Suzy had fallen asleep, hugging myself and crying until I fell asleep eventually. My eyes would always sting when I woke up, but that just reminded me that I should do something if I wanted this to stop. 

However, I had no courage. I would still stare at her name until she went offline. Was she doing fine without me? Would I be selfish if I wanted her to be as miserable as I was? 

Finally, my work had ended. I would stone at work to think about us but I still got my work done. I packed up and grabbed my handbag before leaving but a hand pulled me back. 

"Can I send you home?" Suho asked me softly. He looked sincere. But he was not Seulgi. I shook my head. 

"Thanks." 

"Are you really okay? You look very... down." He sighed. 

"I'm fine." I tried to force a smile. 

"Do you... want to talk about it?" He asked, putting his hands into his pockets to show his nonchalant side even though he was concerned. 

I shook my head again. "I've got to go." 

"Is it Seulgi?" He asked quickly when I turned around. I stopped. "Did the two of you fight?" He walked to my front and looked at me. "Friends can have misunderstandings too." He smiled softly. 

Seulgi and I were not friends. 

"Sorry, but I really need to go." I said and walked away. 

I was not someone who let people in so easily. Seulgi was an exception. I felt something so strong when I set my eyes on her the first time. She made me think that soulmate really exists. 

The bus came early and I had to run to catch it. I thanked myself quietly for not wearing high heels that day. I found myself a seat near the window and just stared out of it, detaching myself from reality temporarily. 

People come and go. My heart stopped when the bus stopped near Seulgi's school. I looked for her among the students who all looked the same because of the uniform but could not spot her at the bus stop. I gave up when the bus left and I stared out of the window blankly again. 

"Hey." 

The voice was so familiar. I turned around and felt my heart skipping a beat when I finally saw the person that I longed for. 

Seulgi. 

"H-Hey." I stuttered and she smiled at me, softly. I just wanted to throw my arms around her and never let her go again. 

"Just ended your work?" She asked me, fidgeting slightly which I supposed she was nervous. She always fidgeted when she was nervous. I liked how cute she was. 

I nodded. "Just ended lesson?" 

"A talk." She corrected me. 

"What talk?" I asked, trying to sound not so desperate when I finally talked to her. 

She smiled at me again. "The scholarship talk." 

Right. The scholarship. It totally slipped my mind when I had been crying for a week. Something burnt in me again when I thought about the scholarship. My fists clenched unknowingly and I only realised it when she put her hand over my fist. 

Her warmth. 

My body relaxed and I turned to look at her slowly. I should not be hindering her from being successful. I should be more mature. I had thought through so much, I certainly did not want to lose her completely. 

"How was it?" I asked, giving her my best smile. 

She removed her hand on my no longer clenched fist and smiled. "Tiring. There was too much information." 

I nodded. 

"Have you eaten?" She asked me again when she saw that I did not talk anymore. I shook my head. My heart beat fast as I anticipated her next question. "Do you... want to have dinner together?" 

"My place or your place?" I asked a little too quickly and she chuckled. I blushed. 

"Anywhere is fine. I have something to talk about too." She said.

"My place then." I said and looked out of the window quickly, afraid that she would change her mind the next moment. 

We did not talk anymore until we alighted the bus. She waited for me to get off the bus and I went to walk beside her. "How was your work?" She asked, trying to clear the awkward atmosphere. 

"Boring." I said. 

"Guess it will never be not boring." She laughed lightly and I smiled to myself. Her laughter was like music to my ear. 

"How was school?" 

"There was an award ceremony today and I was awarded the best performing student award." She said sheepishly. 

"Really?" I asked, feeling proud. "What is it about?" 

"It is like... for students who performed well in both academic and non-academic areas." She said, rubbing her nape. 

"I'm so proud of you." I smiled. 

"Really?" She grinned. "Thanks." 

We were walking to my block when she suddenly stopped and looked at me. "I forgot to tell my mother that I will be going over to your place. Wait." She said and fished out her phone. I giggled quietly at her silly antic and she gave me a sheepish smile as she pressed her phone to her ear. I felt like we were okay again. "Mom? I'm going to Joohyun's house for dinner. Yeah. Yeah. Yeap. Sure. Okay. Bye." Then she hung up and slipped her phone back to her pocket. "Okay let's go." She smiled and I nodded. 

My heart was beating very fast when our hands would brush against each other occassionally. I bit my lip and mustered up some courage to take her hand slowly, she did not reject it. Then I fully grabbed her hand and I smiled when I felt her warmth again. I had missed it. 

We held our hands tighter than usual and I felt safe when I knew that she was beside me again. She pressed for the lift and we waited for it quietly. My mind was in a mess. The way she would steal glances at me as we were inside the lift. The way she squeezed my palm to tell me to go out first. The way she hesitated to let go of my hand when I had to search for the key. 

"Seulgi! long time no see." My mother smiled at Seulgi when she saw her walking behind me. Seulgi bowed at my mother politely and greeted her back. "Let me heat the dinner up." My mother said and went to the dining room, patting Seulgi's cheek as she walked past her. 

"Uhm.. let's go to my room." I said and she nodded, following after me. Suzy was still not bad home and I felt kind of relieved. "Just wait-" 

I was turning around while talking to her and she suddenly pulled me into a back hug, wrapping her arms tightly around my waist and I could feel her breath on the back of my neck. "I miss you, hyun-ah." She whispered and I shivered at how soft her voice sounded like. 

Her thumb would rub against the side of my waist as she nuzzled closer to my nape. "I miss you too. A lot. Everyday." I said and placed my hands over her arms, brushing her soft skin gently. 

"I'm leaving." 

___

Please please please do not rush me to update. I will feel stressed and have mental block :/ sorry.