"It's late, I need to sleep and I already counted all the sheep in my head,

I keep drawing your face out on the ceiling and when I close my eyes,

A book with the story of our ended love opens,

What did I do wrong?

Why did we even break up? I don't know.

Each time I breathe, I miss you.

Like caffeine, I try to stay away,

I try to forgot about you, but I can't do it, I can't help it."

He looked at the small paper in front of him. As if it was the culprit one of his inside pain. He didn't even knew if what he was writing was about Goo Hara or about Yoseob, somehow the feelings were messing up in his head, mixing in a stinging pain. He drank another coffee in one go and closed his eyes. But whatver he did, the picture of Yoseob being scared, threatend and beated was incessantly coming back. Where was he now? Was he in security? Safe? Or was he with the man??! It was suffocating to stay here without any way to help him, to find him... He should have run through all Seoul, checking every houses, every streets, doing everything to find him. But his heart was so heavy... his thoughts so chaotics... 

And again his hand tingled, the pen willing to kiss the paper, he let his deepiest thoughts spurt on the white vastness:

"Cause you're like caffeine, I can't fall asleep all night,

My heart keeps racing, and again I hate you,

Even though I hate you like this,

When I think about the times we were together, I smile,

Maybe I don't want to forget you,

Yes, I don't want to forget you,

I want to cherish you."

He stared at the last words he wrote, dumbstruck by himself. It was written in black and white. And the picture of him hugging Yoseob which was striking his view was absolutely clearly-defined : his heart wildly wanted to cherish him.

He bruptly oppened his eyes. This couldn't be so... Because of so many reasons... It just couldn't. He stood up, grabbed his jacket and headed out of the Cube, deterred to find a place to forget about all this mess. 

He entered a pub, after having parked his car on the opposite side of the street, went directly to the barman and asked for a bottle of Soju. He sat at the counter and began to drink the translucid alcohol. The pub was very noisy as some people were gathered in a circle  at the back of the room, cheering a someone who was dancing. He couldn't properly see as there were so many people, though he could see the dancer was doing quite well. He was wearing a mask and a black sweatshirt, the hood recovering his hair. Junhyung couldn't stop thinking that the way he danced was reminding him of someone else. He just couldn't put his finger on it. 

He began a second bottle. Alcohol already spreading in his body, loosing his tight nerves. He wanted to drown in the liquid, so he wouldn't worry anymore, he wouldn't be heartbroken anymore, he wouldn't love anymore. His throat was hot, his heart burning and his eyes stinging. His view became blurred and the scald in his eyes intensified till a few tears dropped in the alcohol. He placed a hand upon his eyes, hidding his weakness from the world around. He closed his eyelids, releasing more salted droplets. He felt so powerless, unable to help Yoseob, and unable to help himself. He wanted so fiercely to know where he was...he wanted so badly to take him in his embrace and hold him hours long... He wanted him to be there, to comfort him though he was the one to be comforted. He wanted him to hold his hands and smile at him so his happiness would fill his broken heart. He wanted him to enlace his waist and to make fun about random things so he would forget about Goo Hara. He wanted him to wrap his cushion, the cutely way he always does, in the dorm's bed so he would be sure he was safe. He wanted him to be holding his arms, pleading him for a favor, his pupy eyes sparkling and his pinky lips lovely pouting as if they were ready to receive a smooth kiss... 

He swallowed one more glass of soju. 

Suddenly people clapped at the back of the room, and the dancer came to the counter, craving for something to drink. He sat in front of a huge glass, probably filled with beer and soju on the evidence of the colour. He released his mask so he could properly drink and Junhyung's eyes widened in shock. Speechless, he stared blankly at the young man gulping his beverage, his mind hardly checking wether what he just saw was the result of his own imagination or the real truth. Once the glass empty, the boy managed to ask another one and removed his hood. 

"-Yo--Yoseob?!!!! " He blurted in disbelief.

The young man didn't pay attention to anything else than his beverage which was full anew. 

"-Yah Yoseob!" Junhyung yelled trough the ambiant noise, rushing to the little boy.

He bluntly removed the glass from the cute lips and glared at him, waiting for an explanation.

"-Whyyy?? My glass! I want my glass!" The pouty lips yelled. His eyes were looking for the person responsible of his deprivation when they finally met Junhyung.

"-Oh, Hyung!! You----you came to admire my performance?!!" He managed to said slightly punching in Junhyung's torso. "I--I can sign you an--an autograph you know! You--you--you know?"

Junhyung had never seen Yoseob so drunk before. Usually the younger wanted to throw up before he looses his mind but he guessed things happened to change a bit... 

"-What the heck are you doing here?!!" he asked, nevertheless relieved to finally get hold on him : he was in no serious danger here. The dangerous thing was actually his stubborn mind which would want to drink even more...

"-M--Me? I am here? Wee-eelll, what abbout you??!" He asked, taking back his glass and sipped.

"-I'm here to take you home, 'kay?!" He said removing again the glass.

"-Aaaaniiiiii!! Pleazzz, pretty pleazzz! It's fuuun here! "

Junhyung couldn't look away from those sparkling eyes, relishing hapiness the alcohol was giving them. So from the begining it was that, the Jinwoo's hang-over, a night to drink alone till the dawn. A night to forget about all his scars. And he couldn't be mad at him, all he could do was to understand, and to extract him from this place before he do any ethylic coma.

"-Yoseob," He grabbed his hand,  "please, come with me, go home with me. "

The younger's eyes were staring at Junhyung's one, frozen. Seconds passed and he didn't moved an inch except his eyelids which were closing from time to times.

"-Yoseob, Yoseob, what's up?'" He asked shaking him slightly but he didn't move either, only a smear of tears trickled along his cheeks. 

Junhyung took his face in his hands and wiped the tears with his thumbs. 

"-It's okay, Seobi, all will be alright from now on. I promise."

"-Juu--jun," he hoked in sobs, "I--I can't live without you." 

Junhyung took the little boy in his embrace, comforting him. 

"-Please, don't--don"t ever leave me!!" His sobs intensified.

"-I won't, Seobie, I won't." He patted his back.

Yoseob tightened his hold around Junhyung's waist.

"-I need you so much..."

"-Me too." Junhyung whispered, more for himself than for the sobbing boy. "Let's get home, 'kay?" 

This time, he didn't wait for any agreement, he only put Yoseob's arm above his shoulder and walked to the exit. Outside the air was fresh and already held the coldness of a new autumn. Junghyung filled his lungs with the healthy air and turned towards the main avenue. They had to join it if they wanted to get a taxi. But it was bit far and soon Yoseob asked for a break. They sat on a shop's low wall. Junhyung looked in the direction of the avenue, counted how many meters it could be still long, pondering if he could make it by piggybacking him... But a sudden smell extract him from his thoughts, he turned his head back to Yoseob, only to see the latter smoking a spliff!

"-This, what is it?? A--Are you smok--" He couldn't finish his sentence as the view was totally mesmerizing, or maybe was it the high rate of alcohol in his blood that was muffling his heartbeat at the sight. However he couldn't stop staring at these lips releasing the smoke, slowly, while his eyes were away, far away. When all the smoke vanished, he brought the joint to his mouth and took a dragg, the fire scintillations going closer. Junhyung could see the puff crossing his throat, getting in the younger's lungs. He closed his eyes, relishing the feeling of being in another world. He his bottom lips and bite it slightly, definitely spreading the feeling, that feeling in Junhyung's whole body. He hardly swallowed and coughed to make him recover his mind but the alcohol wasn't helping...  The new little cloud was leaving Yoseob's mouth and he wanted to succeed it... he wanted to fill the emptyness the toxic smoke just set free between these lips...

"-Ya--Yaaah!! What are you doing?!" He briskly exclaimed, forcing himself to recover his thoughts. 

He took the spliff and threw it far away, beyond the street. Only then, Yoseob deigned to turn his head slowly, so slowly.

"-What?" Asked two orbs, lost. And it was the exact same look he had the morning, before he fainted, the exact same of being absent...

"-What what? You can't smoke like this! This is not healthy! At all!"

"-Who cares?!"

"-I care! I do care a lot about your health, you punk!" He punched gently his head, trying to knock some sense into it.

"-Just....go away from me...I----I've problems."

"-Tsch, I think I'm in the know, kid." He sighed.

There were so many things he wanted to speak about, so many things he needed to have an answer to, though he couldn't do anything but wait. If he broach the subect now, the younger could tell wrong things, lye without even knowing it and forget all the discussion the next day... 

"-What in the know?! You know nothing about me... You just... I'm just..."

"-You're just what?"

"-Nothing. Nothing if you want to remain my bestfriend..."

Junhyung shrugged at the enigmatic answer.

"-Let's go, we're not far away from the avenue now." 

He lifted Yoseob up but he was so off, so out of himself that he couldn't barely still stand.

"-Seobie-ah, jump on my back."

The latter didn't hesitate as his neurons weren't in the ability of thinking, he jumped on Junhyung's back and wrapped his arms around Junhyung's neck. Once in the avenue, they waited for a taxi and only when one came, Junhyung eventually unstuck the little boy from his back, lying him on the bench seat. He entered the car and sat on the right seat so he could laid Yoseob's head on his lap. He gived the adress to the driver and felt reassured as streets lights scrolled through the glass, bringing them closer to their secure dorm.

"-Juu--Juunii!" Yoseob called, from a middle sleep.

"-I'm here baby."

He fondled his cheek delicately and stopped instantly as he realised what he was actually doing. 

"-Junni!" Yoseob called back, this time full aware, while grabbing Junhyung's jacket. "Kiss me!"

His eyes widened at the request.

"-Whaaat?"

"-Here..." he said, touching his own lips.

Junhyung raised his eyes, praying for holding himself back. 

"-You don't want to?" he asked, with those puppy eyes...

"-Look, it--it's not that I don't want to, it--it's. Aish, stop staring at me this way. Seobie- you're drunk! If I kiss you know, it would be like ! "

The younger shivered at the words. And he knew he did a bad thing using it as now picures were obviously scrolling in front of Yoseob's eyes. A tear trickled from his eyes to the bottom of his hair.

"-It's okay, little bro."

"-I'm scared."

"-I know. But he's not here so please, stay calm. He won't hurt you anymore, anyway. I won't let him. I promise." He asserted while the younger's smooth hair.   

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Quit a short update today, as I wanted to release it fast! :p  

However I really love writing this story! ^^

Thank you for your comments! They always give me strength to write!! ;)