The birthday party started perfectly. When Dongwonn arrived they had begun to prepare the cake, laying every coke around it. Gikwang had had the time to shower and make himself pretty - that meant using the dry hair for the first time of his life - and Hyunseung had finally joined them in the kitchen to the extent that it was a pure miracle if Junhyung still hadn't heard them whispering and giggling in the room just next his couch. 

Anyway, when they were finally ready, they had switched off the lights, catching Junhyung's attention who had stood up from the couch.

"-Happy birthday to you...." they had sang the usual little song and Junhyung had hiden his mouth wide opened with his hands.

As Yoseob had expected it, he wasn't the least aware of the day they were... 

He had thanked his buddies, they had ate the cake greedily, they had blabbered happily drinking the Champagne Gikwang had bought earlier, and now everyone could feel the little relief triggered by the alcohol of the fizz. The atmosphere was getting cooler by second. Hyunseung was happier than any other moment since his dad passed away, it was like he finally allowed himself to feel joy anew. Gikwang was feeling hot and was taking off one of his clothes every ten minutes - luckily he was wearing a few sweaters at the begining so he was still wearing a thin shirt - while Doojoon was speaking even louder than usual. Dongwon was feeling sleepy but whenever he blatantly started to doze on his arms leaned on the table, Gikwang would snapp him hard to wake him up for the following ten minutes. It was a real attraction to observe them, though Yoseob's eyes couldn't stopp glancing nervously at Junhyung. Sure he was in a good mood too because of the alcohol roaming in his blood but something deep in his eyes was giving off sadness. Though Yoseob wasn't sure wether it was reality or only what he wanted to see. 

"-Come here, drink a lot Jun- hyung!" Gikwang exclaimed filling his glass with fizz.

"-Anni! Aigoo... Why do you all want me to be drunk tonight? I won't do a or anything else like that you know!" 

They all laughed, and Yoseob drunk his whole glass in one shot, ignoring the pictures that just crossed his mind...

"-Woh whoa, Yoseobie 's great!!" Gikwang noticed and all turned their gaze to the fake maknae.

"-Sure he's better than you Jun! See, he's younger but already know how to drink!" Doojoon teased.

"-Aigoo, don't encourage the kid to drink alright?!"

"-Whaaat?!! I'm not a kid you pabo! " With that Yoseob pouted cutely making everybody laugh except Junhyung whose mind went blank a few seconds.

"-We should put some music!" Gikwang suggested.

"-Yes, good idea! What about the new album of Infinite? " Junhyung said, relieved to find another topic to cling onto.

All were agree, all except one.

"-No guys, wait!" Hyunseung exclaimed through the laughs and sceams of agreement; though the silence came back quickly as all were curious about whatever Hyunseung was going to say, "It's just, I heard Yoseob playing a new song in his room lately, " all the eyes were back to the small boy, " I thought maybe he would be agree to play it for us now." 

Why, why was Hyunseung so observant? To this Yoseob really wanted to have an answer, because Hyunseung was never really there, he always was in his own little world but sometimes he turned to this attentive and over-protective young man and when it happened, you just don't understand what's going on. You just agree to whatever he ask without thinking properly about it, because you never prepared yourself to reject him or any of his request. So did Yoseob. In front of five pair of pleading eyes, in front of Hyunseung's candid one and in front of Junhyung's begging one, he nodded.

"-Sure, if you want me to play it. "

He said yes when his heart was screaming at himself to run away. Because this song, he had been playing these days, wasn't a song for Beast neither for him. It wasn't a business song in a way. It was his sadness glued to words, stuck to a melody and a guitar riff. It wasn't a song for a birthday party, not at all. But because he was also suffering from whatever his relationship with Jun had became, because the alcohol was slightly lightening everything and because love was bubbling in his stomache, he just stood up, grabbed his guitar from the edge of the livingroom and sat back in front of Junhyung. He glanced at him and the elder gave him back a cheering look. The younger sighed, and coughed, trying to get rid off the nervosity. He eventually began his riff, then his voice filled the room and he just gave himself over to the song.

"Diamonds, Stream of happiness,

Bleeding in my heart,

Scars, Tears, twist of loneliness,

Blasting in my heart,

Though I want to feel it like a start,

Oh I want to play it like a start,

I'm breatheless, I'm senseless

'Cuz on this wistfull day,

On this teary melody,

I'm still thinking of us, 

Silently, greedily, gradually,

I'm still thinking of us,

The way you would kiss me,

The way you would love me,

Oh baby let me think of us,

Let me believe I can change my pain into dreams...

Imaginary kisses roaming on my skin,

Overwhelming my sense,

Love bites and you're my everlasting sin,

Drowning in your fragrance,

I'm leaving this world for a fiction bliss,

 'Cuz on this wistful day,

On this teary melody,

I'm still thinking of us, 

(Oh no oh no I can't help it,)

Silently, bleakly, gradually,

I'm still thinking of us,

The way you would kiss me,

The way you would love me,

Oh no baby let me think of us,

Let me change our pain into dreams,

Let us try what you're afraid to live,

Let us try what you're afraid to live."

He ended his riff, and gazed intensely at his guitar, not daring to lift his eyes. During the song he had kept them closed the main time, only opening them to check the chords his hand was making. Some clapped their hands and it decided him to raise the head but his eyes bumped straight into Junhyung's teary one. He wasn't oppenly crying though, and someone who didn't care as much as Yoseob cared wouldn't have caught it, but there definitely was a glitter in his eyes that was about to overflow. He was the only one who wasn't clapping his hands and it was obvious he was trying to handle inner feelings. 

Aside, the others began to blabber anew, not paying attention to them anymore, not even realising they weren't in the discussion. To the extent that when Junhyung briskly stood up to open the main window and get on the small balcony, they didn't notice it.

Yoseob laid back his guitar to its place and joined the elder on the balcony. The wind was bitter cold and it slapped his baby face. Junhyung was leaning his elbow on the barrier, his left hand still getting the tears out of his eyes. Only when he noticed the younger's presence he ceased to rub them.

"-I'm sorry." The younger whispered in the wind and it seemed like it was gulping his words. "I shouldn't have sing this song."

Seconds passed in silence and Yoseob started wondering if he had heard him.

"-It's over. I'm over." he blurted finally, still avoiding the younger's percent gaze, "I can't hold myself anymore." 

He looked downwards, holding his tears. He was living his last inner fight but however he knew he had already gave up. He finally faced the small boy and Yoseob saw how he had suffered these two weeks, he saw how he had tortured himself to stay away from him, he saw.  

"-Seobie," he took the younger's hands in his and rooted his gaze in his eyes,  "I don't know if I'm ready, but I'm definitely not ready for the nothingness."

He lifted one of his hand and fondled the younger's fresh cheek.

"-Baby," he continue in a sough, "I want to be yours".

Yoseob's eyes widened and the cold wind hurted them slightly so that a stream of tears was trickling on the corner of his eyes.

"-J-Jun--" was the only thing he could mutter as the latter just pulled him in a desperate embrace, grabbing his hair and inhaling their heady scent. 

"-Show me how to love you, show me how to burst this feeling, please baby, show me how I can make you mine." Junhyung whispered in his ear, making him shiver like never.

The younger pulled him appart, loosing the embrace in order to face him properly and the time seemed to stopp. While Seoul's lights were dancing on their faces, while cold was gnawing their skin, he discerned a twinkle in his best friend's orbs. A twinkle of love. And that little twinkle just set a wave of warm tickling off all over his body.

He wasn't sure wether Jun was serious or not, wether it was a long-term decision or a weakness during his birthday party but all he was sure of, was that he needed him. Even if it was just for a night, even if it was just for a second, he was ready to give himself away.

"- You're sure you wanna try tonight?" he asked more by politess than to know the other's answer.

The elder cupped his small face in his hands and inspected his eyes.

"-I wanna taste you right now." he blurted before he crashed his lips on Yoseob's one.

Two weeks he hadn't felt these pouty lips against his, two weeks and he was intolerably in need of it. It was stronger than any addiction. And actually the feeling of the kiss, the warmth of his tongue slipping in his mouth was even more exhilarating than in his memories.

As he parted to breath properly, the younger wrapped his waist firmly, closing the distance between their chest. And it felt so right suddenly. Like if they were born to be there, embracing the other one, like if the upper part of his hips were made for Yoseob's hands to rest on it, like if their lips were drew to interlock. 

Yoseob deepened the second kiss, and cautiously clentched the elder's , knowing he wasn't used to such grisp between men. He knew he had to progress step by step. Though Junhyung's reaction wasn't exactly the one he expected since Junhyung entwined his fingers in the younger's hair pulling him even closer. And when they parted in gaspe of air, his eyes were blazing with lust. 

Junhyung took a strand of Yoseob's hair that the wind had removed.

"-Lead me to the other world." he murmured while carefully putting the strand back into its place on top of the smooth tuft.

"-Then follow me." the dark orbs answered in a breath.

He took Junhyung's hand and entered back in the warm and noisy room. The others had put some random music in the CD player and they were speaking very loud in order to cover the music... On the table were laying empty bottles of beverages he even didn't knew they had bought... He smiled to himself, at least they won't have to care about the noise they were about to make... And his cheeks heated up...while his stomache twistled. Tonight, he had to be attentive and carefull. Junhyung was still fresh to this, and between kiss a man and make a love with a man there was a big gap...

He opened the bedroom's door and for the first time he considered his bedroom as something intimate, as a cocoon for them both.

Junhyung closed the door, locked it with a gaze that realeased a ball of fire in the other's chest. Then he closed the distance between them and started to kiss his neck avidly, breathing him, eating him. He his milky skin from time to time, leaving red marks from under his ear to the start of his collar bone, while the younger was trying to stay on earth, clinging onto Junhyung's hair to keep his balance. Soon a hand was grasping his sweater, trying to remove it, what Yoseob complied before removing Junhyung's one. But Junhyung was always feeling hotter than him so while he was still wearing a shirt with long sleeve, the elder was only wearing a large T-shirt letting see his bare arms. The younger didn't wait a semi-second, he instantly kissed the bare skin, his baby biceps. He only ceased when he arrived at the start of his tattoo on his left shoulders. He only saw it once fully, because the day he did it he was so proud that he had took off his shirt in front of him in this particular bedroom, pretending he wanted to show it to his bestfriend first and Yoseob barely stood in consciousness at the sight. The owl fitted perfectly his chest, making it look manlier, ier than it originally was. Because true was Jun was the less brawny memeber in Beast as he pretty disliked sport, but with the tattoo it felt suddenly perfect.

"-Jun" he whispered in his ear, "may I remove your shirt?" 

He bites smoothly his lobe, making sure he wouldn't reject his request.

"-Mphh, Su--sure." 

Yoseob slipped his hands in it, brushing his skin, his ribs, and eventually took it off.

Junhyung saw his shirt fall on the ground and right then felt a hand skimming his left pectoral, drawing over his tattoo, and going down till it brushed his . He bite his lips. Why was he getting excited so quickly? Was it because of the little amount of alcohol running in his blood or was it only because it was a guy who was touching him? Was it because Yoseob was really the only one for him? The right one... He dropped his thoughts as something wet succed to the hand. He closed his eyes as the were getting clearer and longer. He felt his legs weaken and Yoseob caught it, so the latter pushed him gently against the door to let him have something to lean against.

Then he felt kisses burning his skin, teasing his nerve over his ribs and then it was back to his s. He grabbed the youngers hair lifting his small head to the level of his lips and kissed him fiercely, his hands moving to his cheeks framing the cute face. He felt like burning and he decided to allow himself to do what he wanted to since months already. He grabbed the younger by the waist and walked forwards till Yoseob's legs bumped into his bed, till Yoseob fell on the fluffy stuff. The latter instinctively moved backwards to the pillow while Junhyung was joining him, straddling his left legs and gripping his white shirt. He started to the thin fabric and after each button he landed a kiss on the younger's chest. When he finally ended the work he pulled the short wide oppen and he forged to breath a few seconds. 

He had seen Yoseob's chest before, a few times already, between two shows or even lately when Doojoon had removed his shirt that day he fainted. Or even when he had applyed the cream. But now it was all different. It was all different because his torso wasn't covered by ecchymosia, it was just white, milky white. Pure and beautiful. And today it wasn't between a shower and a perfomance, today he had time to ogle his chest. 

Yoseob laughed sheepishly at Junhyung's reaction and it activated all his abdominal muscles emphacising his well-drew six packs. And that's when he realized how manly Yoseob's body was. He had always thought the cutest face of Korea would have a childish body, but he was surprised it wasn't the case, and he was even more surprised to note how a manly and y chest could double his desire.

"-You alright Jun?" the boy under him asked, now worried about his non-reaction.

"-Seob, you---you're so beautiful..."

Their eyes made contact, an intense one. Only broken by a kiss Junhyung sealed on his lips, before diving in his chest, kissing for the first time another man, cherishing for the first time another man. But his desire was never staisfyed so that he removed entirely Yoseob's shirt and threw it away. Then he took the younger in his tight embrace, curving their body under the love pressure. He wanted to tight the embrace, to tight it till his heart feel full, and something began to hurt in his pants. He kept going on kissing till Yoseob's legs brushed the thing unintentionally. It was definitely too much to handle and a little moan escaped his mouth before he could even think about it. 

"-Let you drift honey... Don't feel ashame, you're absolutely perfect." Yoseob stated, fondling his cheek. 

Then he brushed once again the part, intentionally this time, waiting for the little moan.

"-Mmm"

"-Relish what you feel" he whispered in Junhyung's ear, "And tell me if there's anything you don't like."

With that he rolled till he reached the dominant position. He straddled the elder and started to kiss the border between his skin and his pants. With a hand layed on the lump, he could feel the thing tense at each kiss. Then he slowly ed and ped his pants. He lowered the rough fabric, kissing his legs till he took it entirely off. He came back upon Junhyung's hips, he leaned forwards and discerned a touch of unease in his dark eyes.

"-What's up Junni?"

The latter palmfaced his cheeks hiding a half his eyes, avoiding carefully Yoseob's one.

"-No-nothing........It's.......... It's just..."

"-Heyy, it's just what?" Yoseob asked on a comforting tone, grasping his wrist.

He was looking for an answer in his eyes but there weren't properly afraid nor sad...

"-Its just---cou--could you take your pants off too?" he stuttered and Yoseob smiled in relief at his shyness, "I kinda wanna.....feel you...over me." he ended looking downwards on his lap, like a children who would be confessing a silly thing.

"-You know, you acting shy ist the cutest thing in the world?" the younger stated and pecked him on the forehead.

Then he sat on the bedside and started to remove his pants when he felt lips on his shoulder and arms surrounding his waist.

"-You're so pretty" the elder soughed against his collar bone, soon kissing his ear.

"-Ju--awwwmmm--aaha--Junni---- A-aajjimaa!" he gigled and moaned at the same time, hardly trying to take off the pants.

When he finally managed to do it, he heard a deep breath before feeling air roaming along his skin.

"-Your hair...it's wondrous." He inhaled once again, tightening his grip on the younger's waist. 

Then he removed his hand and fondled Yoseob's cheeks, making him spin slightly his head. He leaned closer till he reached his lips.

It was a smooth kiss. Which turned into a very passionate one right after Junhyung Yoseob's lower lips... Adroitly the latter came back on Junhyung's lap, begining to move up and down, brushing their private part together.

Once again the elder closed his eyes, relishing the pleasure, feeling it flooding in his veins. Never ever he had had so much pleasure with skin-touches. They were still in boxer and he already was on cloud nine. Outside the laughs of the other were muffled by his excitement. The whistle in his ears was getting louder by second as his blood pressure was driving roller coaster. His breath hacked stronger at each kiss the younger landed on his body and when he felt fingers slipping in the thin fabric, willing to remove it, he began to panic.

"-Wai-wait Yoseob-ah, I--I'm not sure" he stuttered holding back the fabric.

But the other didn't care, he slipped his fingers in it and skimmed the sensitive skin, supressing instantly any reluctance.

"-Wow----------Seob-ie----wha-at are you doing?!" he passed an hand in his hair, trying to withstand the amount of lust rushing in him. 

He wanted the small boy, he wanted him fiercely but at the same time he had no idea about how to proceed. He was scared about what was coming, though, he couldn't wait any longer for it.

Yoseob threw their boxers away and kept on doing his treatment, blushing ferociously at the sight of his lover getting high.

"-Seobie-ah---aww---*pant*pant* -- show me now, *pant*  tell me how, I--I need it."

The younger climbed on him and scanned his eyes.

"-You're sure Junnie? You know you don't have to do it. It's your first time, we should take it slow."

"-Damn it all! I just...... can't wait any longer." he blurted still breathless.

"-Okay. Listen, I need to prepare myself for you to get in." as he spoke, the elder gathered his sense and was literally drinking his words, learning as fast as he could how to make it, "I'll do it myself tonight 'cause I'm not sure you're ready for all of that. When I'll tell you I'm done, you'll just have to enter me, like with girls. It's basically the same, except you'll have to be slower cause I'm a way narrower than girls.... Or well, at least at the begining."

Junhyung nodded and saw Yoseob laying beside him, his fingers and eventually putting it in his inside. He looked at the scene in total disbelief. He was shocked because of what the younger was doing like if it was the most normal thing in the world, and he was shocked because of how y the younger was, penetrating himself... But above all, he was shocked because he was indeed appreciating the sight.

"-Gnnn---*breath*breath*, Juunn, get--get into me." he pleaded, pulling out his fingers.

His eyes were closed, waiting for the other one to enter him. His mouth was slightly opened, letting out ashort-winded breath...

Junhyung rushed above him and began the process. But it felt so small, so narrow that he really didn't understand how he could get entirely in him, though at the same time, it really felt amazing...so he just kept going, the slowest he could. But it felt better and better to the point that was growing inside.

"-ahh, it-it hurts a little."

"-oh I'm sorry baby, I'm sorry, I just can't control it, it just feels too good..."

"-It's okay Junnie. Now you're in, let's wait a little. it has been a long time I didn't make a love. " he fondled the elder's cheek, "It actually has been a while I was waiting for you..." 

He smiled, a smile of fondle love and Junhyung kissed his smile, smoothly.

After some time, Yoseob started to move slightly, telling Junhyung he was okay to go further.

"-Aww-- Junn---awww" Yoseob moaned as the elder was going up and down. "fasster pleaz, faster!"

Junhyung complied and soon the younger was tearing up in moan, gripping the sheets, and breathing in hiccup.

And so, he was even more beautiful than usual, Junhyung thought. Because now, he was out of any worry, he was out of any sadness. There was only him and happiness, only him and pleasure. Here, in his arms, in his embrace, he finally could be sure he was safe. He had protect the younger some times in the past, maybe often, but now it was more than that. Now he could make him happy, he could make him feel this bliss.

Now, he could make him his.

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The longest chapter ever! ^^
How did you find it? Did you like? Can't wait for your reactions!!!

I didn't rated M because I didn't want to break the suspense. I'll rate it M in two days or so ;) 

Please comment with abandon! :p :p