Chapter 19

Aisha Kim

(Song for fluff scene: http://youtu.be/QVX3VgGjdmo)

I had an announcement to make.

“Sage!” I said, and then coughed. “Video!” I said a little softer. Ow ow ow ow. The last time I made a video, Sage and I were thanking all the people that got me to 1 million subscribers, and I promised I'd make small tour videos as well.

“Oh right!” Sage said, remembering her cue. She stood up on her seat. “YO EVERYONE! Aisha’s making a tour video!” The group clustered around the tripod I was setting up for my camera. I situated the camera and pressed the record button once everyone was ready.

“Hello, Gems and Exotics!” I signed, “We just want to thank you for letting us be able to go on tour for the first time. For us, and with Exo! We love you!”

Suho chimed in. “You guys are incredible and we wouldn’t be here without you!” The boys nodded in unison.

“If you have any questions for us while we’re on tour, don’t hesitate to ask.” Minji chimed in. 

HeeYoung said, “We may not get to them all because we’ll be busy, of course, but we’ll try the best we can.”

“I just can’t believe we have such awesome people supporting us and we just can’t thank you enough.” Kris added.

“See you soon! Keep Shining!” I signed, and ended the video.

“I still can’t believe I get to go on the tour.” Sage squealed as the groups went back to playing on their phones, conversing, or fiddling with a Rubik's cube *cough* Luhan *cough* *cough*.

“Believe it.” I signed, and decided to go exploring in the train-of-a-tour bus.

Apparently this gigantic bus was custom built just for this tour. The front was of course the driver, but behind that were couches and tables anchored down so nothing would slide around. Past the couches area was a kitchen that definitely was made to be impressive and beyond that were three bathrooms. Each were specified as Exo M, Exo K, and Jewelz. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t impressed. The very very back were the bunk beds, one side specifically for Jewelz and the other for Exo members going down this long hallway-like thing. Each bed had curtains for privacy, which made me feel a lot better. The end of the bus had an emergency door and another bathroom.

I found my bags on one of the top bunks. I found Sage’s below mine. Nice choice. Knowing her she'd probably fall out of the bed, so bottom bunks are much safer. I climbed up and checked it out, noticing that the bed was ready made. I unpacked my journal I bought for the trip and began to write my first entry.

So, today’s my first day of touring. School was let out a week ago, so no more worries about school work and anxiety that I may not finish everything and bleh!

There are many things that I’m excited about, such as meeting actual fans and not Sasaengs, and of course seeing the sites. We’ll be going around Korea, then China, and then actually making a quick Appearance in Japan which HeeYoung is over the moon about. And finally we’ll be headed off to America to K-Con, which is probably what I’m excited about the most. 

The bus is astounding. I’ll be taking pictures later. Maybe I’ll even make a scrapbook. I dunno yet. All I know is that in roughly 15 minutes we’ll be at the stadium getting ready for our first concert ever. I think that’s all for now!

“What are you writing, Aisha?” I heard someone say. I put up the journal and peeked over the bunk bed. Jongin was smiling up at me. Wow, it feels good to actually not have to look up at him. I reached for his arm to write on it.

Tour Diary, kinda. I want to remember my first tour.

“That’s pretty cool.” He said, smiling. “Having fun being so tall?” I nodded, leaning closer to him, but still maintaining my balance. He took a few steps closer.

“Need help getting down?” he asked. I shook my head, but switched positions so my feet dangled off the edge of the bed. He swung my legs back and forth.

“I really have missed you these past months. It’s really hard to pretend-” he started to say, but I put my finger to his lips.

I know it’s hard. But we did see this happening.

He nodded in understanding, looking suddenly shy. Every interview they’d been on, he’d play with his ring which made me so happy to think that he’d been thinking of silent-old-me during those times, and even happier when he was wearing it in their music video. I wondered if it made him just as happy to see that I had done the same.

"I've been really scared in the interviews. I keep thinking I'll slip up. And of course with there being more than just one to get ready for..." he faded off. I knew exactly how he felt. I'd been feeling extremely overworked, especially right before the tour. I would come home and immediately fall asleep. Sometimes I didn't even make it up to my room. SM wouldn't allow me to have any more days off since they figured out the lie when I went out to see about my vocal chords, so I've been terrified of getting sick or getting injured.

"I know." I whispered. "I didn't realize how hard it really was to be a Kpop idol...well I didn't really sign up for it either."

"Yeah, they just found you by chance." he said, reaching up to play with my hands.

"Or fate..." I whispered. He smiled.

"Are you sure you're okay up there?" he asked, resting his head on my knee. I nodded, poking his nose. He threw a mischievous look.

Without warning he pulled on my legs, causing me to fall forward. I gasped, waiting to hit the ground, but in one smooth motion I was in his arms. My arms were wound around his neck, trying to calm myself down. His hands were supporting my back, his waist between my thighs. I blushed and tried to calm down from the somewhat near-death experience. He gently pulled off my mask, much to my annoyance, and placed it on the bed.

“There, much better.” he grinned. 

“There are nicer ways to bring your girlfriend closer to you, besides suddenly yanking her off the bed.” I said softly. I tried to talk a little louder. “And I told you I was perfectly okay with just sitting.”

“Well I was not.” he said, laughing. He poked my nose playfully. I began to play with his hair, causing him to muse a purring noise. I giggled and pressed my forehead to his.

“This. I’ve missed this...so much.” he said quietly.

“Me too.” I whispered back.

He gazed into my eyes and brushed noses with me. I closed my eyes and savoured the feeling of intimacy I haven't had in a long time. I felt him slowly close what was left of the gap between us and he kissed me, lips molding perfectly with mine. I missed this, I missed it so much. The longing I felt for all those months was finally released and I felt like melting. I felt his arms wrap more securely around me as he deepened the kiss. My heart fluttered madly inside my ribcage. Yes...yes... my blood was saying as it went coursing through my veins.

We broke away at the same time, breathing a bit harder.

“Saranghae, Aisha.” he whispered, kissing my exposed stain.

“Na-do, saranghae, Jongin.” I whispered back into his ear. He began to trail kisses from my temple down back to my mouth. I squeezed him tight against me and sighed, relishing the moment. Why was love so complicated in the Kpop world? We can sing about it all we want but can never truly experience it unless we break the rules. I felt tears prick from the corner of my eyes.

No, no I can't cry now.

"Aisha..." his breath was hot against my skin. "Did I do something wrong?"

"No, no, it's not this. It's just...we work so hard, and come home so tired all the time, and hungry. And then when I think about us...and what the Fist would do if he found out..." I choked out. More tears came.

"No, Noona, don't cry." he said, adjusting his grip on me. "We'll be okay, I promise. We'll find a way. Please stop crying...it's going to make me cry." He moved one of his arms up and wiped the tears away. I saw his eyes water a little too. Ugh, why did I have to think about this now of all times?

I tucked my head into his shoulder. I remembered what I told Sage all those long months ago, how I didn't ask to be a Kpop idol. You think that you're so ready to be idolized and be able to travel and all of those wonderful things...but you seem to lose everything as well. Jongin seemed to be my anchor to this hectic life. He's been in the realm for a long time now and he understands. I didn't know where I'd be without him quite honestly.

"Jongin...I'm terrified." I whispered.

"Me too." he whispered back. I positioned myself to face him again, letting my longer than usual hair still drape over his shoulder. "But you know what?"

"What?" I asked softly.

"Nothing, and no one, will ever destroy my love for you, my beautiful black pearl." He leaned in closer and this time I kissed him first, cupping his face with my hands. I squeezed my legs tighter against him, which surprised him. He caught me off guard by his teeth playfully biting my lower lip. I jumped, and I felt him smile. I let myself go, forgetting where we were and just felt him. Secure, safe, and maybe even deeply loved. 

Love overdose?

Heck.

Yes.

“I SAID NO HANKY PANKY!”

We broke apart instantly, breathing heavily. I almost fell. He carefully set me down and I steadied myself, pulling some of my hair over to my left side. I covered up my mark. The boys still haven't seen it yet. We looked down the long hallway and saw Chen standing in the doorway. Jongin turned red.

“Hyung, give us a break.”