Author's POV

"Hyung why does she seems so depressed these days?" Jongin asked Chen. 

"I don't know, It feels weird seeing her like this" Chen let out a sigh. 

"Oh hyung, annyeong!" Jongin waved his hand frantically at Suho. "Hey" Suho replied. 

"Do you know what's wrong with her these days?" Chen asked Suho while pointing at Hana who's sat alone, leaning on the glass mirror with her head facing her left, showing her sharp jawline.

"I tell you later, let's have an extra practice since we have monthly evaluation around the corner" Suho said. "Araso" Chen agreed.

Hana's POV

My body was restless, sometimes I don't sleep during night because I kept on thinking the same thing over and over again. He was so selfish, why did he leave me. Me weight went down 4kgs because I rarely have proper meal. I often excuse myself from them because I'm worried that they feel uncomfortable being around the 'sad' me. I know they're worried but I don't know how to expressed myself and how to tell things that I'm supposed to keep it to myself.

Practice ended early today, I was so tired so I took a sit on the floor while leaning against a mirror glass. No one bothered to talk to me, and I am also weren't interested in talking to anyone right now. Everything seems messed up. 

My mind,

My social life,

Basically, everything in life.

I wanted to take a fresh air so I took my back pack and slung over my right shoulder and walked upstairs to the rooftop. 

I feel calm whenever the humid air blew. I feel secure whenever I see the bright sky and the sound of birds chirping made me calm. But something inside me just kill me everytime I think about something's nice. It's the monsters that hide within me has woke up, I don't feel the way I am. I feel depressed.

Slowly, with big steps. I walked toward the corner of the building. I looked around and no one was here. It's just me and my lunatic feelings. I look down and closed my eyes. Taking a deep breath.

"Hana!" a familiar voice shouted.

I turned around and faced Chen who's looking at me, he's panting. "No... no" he said

"Just... don't jump" 

"Please, I beg you. Please don't jump" he begged.

I just stood there, looking at blankly at him. Winds blowing my hair sideways, with no expression "Why shouldn't I?" I asked him. 

"You're not alone. I'm here" Chen pleaded.

"What are you saying" I said looked down. "What does have it have to with me?" I asked.

"I'm here, I'll be with you. I'll protect you, look over for you, be with you and always be there for you by your side" Chen said sincerely.

"How can I trust you" I murmured. 

"HOW CAN I TRUST YOU WHEN EVENTUALLY PEOPLE WILL LEAVE ME" I shouted.

"I-i" Chen stuttered.

"TELL ME HOW CAN I TRUST YOU?! NO ONE DESERVES MY TRUST. EVEN IF THEY DO THEY WILL BREAK ME AND DISAPPOINT ME AND KILL ME AND-"

Chen ran up to me and hugged me tightly. I broke down and started crying on his shoulder "you may be deceived if you trust to much, but you will live in torment if you don't trust enough" he said. 

"Everything just hurts me a lot, everything around me hurts me" I said. I look him in the eyes "Why are you being like this. You should have just watch me die" I continued.

"Watch you die? are you kidding me?" he lift his right eyebrows. I nodded. "Why not?" I asked.

"Imagine how do you feel if I jump in front of you. You must feel hurt right?" he said.

"Well slightly hurt but mostly I feel guilty" I let out a sigh. 

"Please don't do that again. I know about it already, you're not alone. You have us okay, you can rely on us. We'll always be with you, don't worry if they don't I will hunt them down" he said

I chuckled "Okay, okay I won't" I smiled.

"Promise?" 

"Promise" we locked our pinky fingers together and smiled.

"You look horrible right now" he wiped my tears with his thumb and tucked streak of my hair behind my ears. "Now you look better" he smiled.

"Gomawo oppa" I smiled.

"No, gomawo Hana for not leaving me" he said and kissed my forehead.

"Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment"

Who's excited for actor Do Kyungsoo?! looking forward to the first episode of "It's okay, It's love"