Taeyeon's POV

"Do you find me disgusting Taeyeon?" Jessica asks again while looking straight in my eyes, expression's impassive and blank

Does she know that I know her secret already? Should I even say my side?

"Sica--"

"Taeyeon, I have a very simple question." she sighs and prepares to get off the car, unbuckling her seatbelt

"Do you find yourself disgusting?" I ask, the words just simply came out from my mouth and I know I can't take it back anymore.

She parts her lips like she's about to say something but instead, she smiles, a thin yet beautiful smile. 

"I do." she nods a bit "That's why I understand why you feel like that during these past few months."

I look down feeling heavy, erase that.. I'm feeling guilty. "Why did you do that?" I ask as I look away

 "Why do you need to know? It's over for quite some time now." She speaks very low but audible enough for me to hear.

"Cause I just need to." I exhale a sigh of relief as soon as I hear her say it's over but my heart drops as soon as she ask me another question

"Is that why you've been ignoring me?"

The guilt that I'm feeling, I can't take it anymore.. Am I too judgemental? Did I overreact? "Sica, I'm sorry.." 

"It's okay Taeyeon.. I understand you...but please.. don't tell Tiffany, Yuri or the other girls yet.."

"It's their right to know Sica.."

"I can't take it if there are five other girls who will look at me with disgust and ignore me like you did."

"Five?" I furrow my brows and counted. 

"You know it. I know it of course, Hyoyeon knows it and--so does Yoona"

I gasped "I know about Hyoyeon, but Yoona?"

"Yes. I told her about it before going to San Francisco"

"How can you tell Yoona but not me?" I hold her arm but she quickly shoves it away

I see her close her eyes for a while before looking at me "Cause she believes in me and you don't..she can understand me but you can't..same goes with Hyoyeon." 

"Sica, if they saw it themselves, maybe they will--"

"They will react the same way you did? No. I don't think so.. Hyoyeon talked to me first before reacting."

"Look, it's not my fault that I--"

"I'm not saying it's your fault, but you shouldn't compare yourself to Yoona or Hyoyeon.. They know every single part of me, you don't."

I bite my lower lip due to shame, why do I feel ashamed anyway,  my pride rise up in my mouth and again words just simply slip out "Then why don't you tell Yuri, Tiffany and the others so that you would know that I'm not the only monster that doesn't know the real side of her co-member."

She frowns, a tinge of hurt can be seen on her face but anger is overtaking. I look away "I don't want to tell Yuri because I can't afford to lose her. I want to tell her my own...and about the others...I didn't say you are a monster..but since you said it yourself, I don't think they are as monster as you."

"But I'm not the one who screws up with my friend's boyfriend!" I shout, looking at her.

She slaps me on my right cheek, her eyes become shiny due to the watery substance that's about to come out.

"You don't know anything.." she closes her eyes again and  clenches her fists

"Then let me know everything!" I shout for the second time around while holding my cheek.

 "Please, Sica.. I want to know.." I utter with a soft voice.

She opens her eyes and wipes it using the sleeve of her shirt then recomposes herself again "They are waiting for the cake." she says and gets off the car, leaving me dumbfounded.

I walk out of the car as well and follow her inside the bakery, she's not speaking or even looking at me the whole time we are picking a cake.

"That would do." she points at a cake with strawberries, cherries and an orange as its toppings

"Ara. I'll pay it." I, then walk to the cashier and points at the cake that we are going to buy. Hearing mumbles and whispers, Jessica puts on her sunglasses. "I'll just wait for you at the car." she walks away again and I just heave a sigh and look down

"Taeyeon-ssi? I see you are with Jessica-ssi. I thought TaengSic is dead!" the cashier blurts out

"Ah." I grin awkwardly and rub my nape "We are just buying Tiffany's cake. I need to go now. Kamsahamnida" I smiled and bowed. 

I walk away after paying, bowing politely to the other fans. I got inside the car and find Jessica scanning through her phone. I put the box of cake on the backseat and start driving the car.

"Sica--"

"Let's not talk about it."

"But I want to be okay with you.."

"We are okay."

I sigh and shake my head "Fine."

"Taeyeon, I'm begging you, let me be the one to tell the others when I'm ready."

I just nod. Actually, I feel mad and pissed off about the whole thing, I deserve an explanation, maybe not as a friend but as a leader, why does it feels like she's the one who's mad..I didn't even do anything bad on this whole thing..or did I? 

"Taeyeon...assure me.."

"Yeah. Yeah. Promise I won't tell them."

"Thank you." she utters the words sincerly without looking at me.

After that, there are no other exchange of words between us. Is that it? I don't have any closure about what happened, I don't know where to stand or what to act infront of her. I doubt it if we will talk again..I doubt it we are going to be alone again like this, because knowing Sica, she'll just ignore me..like the way I did to her..

We arrive at about 3 in the afternoon and the others are already preparing. I sit down the couch and I watch her as she walks towards her room.

Yuri's POV 

When Taeyeon and Jessica arrived, Jessica directly walk towards her room. Something must have happened.. I click my tongue. Taeyeon, she hurt her again..She always do. I just shook my head and I walk towards Jessica's room. I expected a gloomy or crying Jessica but instead, I saw a brunette brushing her hair infront of the mirror while wearing her usual expression

"Sica."

"Kwon Yul!" she beams then stands up to hug me

"Did something happen between you and Taeyeon?"

She shakes her head and hugs me tigher

"Sleep with me." she looks up, eyes not giving away any dull nor ha