Chapter Eight

I apologize for any mistakes and any typos or any grammar or whatever errors in this chapter. Please bear with me.

On the following day, Taecyeon met me. I could say, he came to my house almost every day. Only to accompany me to have a dinner or lunch out. Every time we meet, I would do the same thing; urged him to make the order for our invitation card as soon as possible. Strangely enough, no matter how many times I pushed him, he remained calm. He didn’t give a damn about my worries. What did he only do? Staring at me and just listened to everything I said to him. The only thing he said to me was regarding to his feeling. “Do you love me, Sica?” That was the question I kept hearing from him at the very last moment before we get married.

“If anything ever happen to me, I don’t want you to cry. If you could, don’t drop any of your tears for me.”

But to me, I didn’t feel strange with Taecyeon’s weird behavior until I received a news about Taecyeon’s death that made me lose myself for a while.

The news about Taecyeon’s death, I received on late Friday’s night.  I can’t think what should I do once I answered the phone call from my mother. I became speechless for a while. I couldn’t bewail his sudden demise.

“What’s wrong, Jess?” Asked Bella when she saw me sitting abruptly on the corner of the living room, same goes to my cell phone. It fell on the floor with a loud thud. I felt like my soul also flew along with Taecyeon’s life which had been taken from the accident.

I can’t accept this..

Kelly quickly grabbed my cell phone and it rang once again. This time, she answered the call. I felt so weak. My body was like breaking down. My hearing seemed dead.

What is Kelly talking about on the phone? Why does she hand over the phone to me? Who wants to talk to me? I don’t know what is happening!!

“Jess!” Bella screamed my name.

But I didn’t even bother to Bella’s scream. I quickly stood up and start walking to my room even though Bella was still screaming next to my ears. I was like a mad person, losing direction. In the end, I didn’t enter my room and sit back on the chair.

“Jess, pull yourself together!” I could hear Kelly’s voice.

I am not deaf, guys. Why must Bella screams to call me?

Kelly was crying. I wanted to get up and go into my room but I can’t move my feet. I couldn’t.

“I want to call Taecyeon. Ma said he’s gone.”

Kelly cried even more after hearing my lament. Her cries got louder. I tried to grab hold on Bella’s body, borrowing her body for me to stand up.

“What’s wrong with me, Bella? Why can’t I get up?”

Now Bella became like Kelly, they were both crying, watching me.

“Why do you guys cry without no reason? What’s wrong?” I asked half screaming. I felt stuffed by how my housemates’ act. I gasped and struggled to breathe.

Does oxygen on Earth get reduced until it’s hard for me to breathe?

“Kelly, we should take her to her room.  Il Woo oppa will come soon and take her to Gimpo.”

That was the last sentence I heard from my housemates.

*****

The early sunlight was so bright and it lit my room entirely, waking me up from my slumber. Once I opened my eyes, ma was the first person that I could see. There’s a clear drop on her cheeks. I now realized that I’m at Gimpo, in my room.

Pa came in, approaching my bed. Yunho oppa and Il Woo oppa were there too.

“Yunho oppa? When did you come home?” I asked him while trying to get up.

Yunho oppa immediately hugged me as tight as he could. As if trying to transfer his strength to me. Yunho oppa, he is my brother. My best friend. Maybe I couldn’t have a good and nice guy like Yunho oppa as my life partner, but Taecyeon was a nice guy too. In fact, I loved him so much even though he wasn’t as same as Yunho oppa.

Taecyeon?

I looked at Yunho oppa and then at ma. Why does Yunho oppa hug me? Why is ma crying? Last night incident slowly crept into my mind. I stared at them back. Clearly, they were observing my behavior.

“I’m dreaming, am I? Ma? Yunho oppa, Taec is fine, right? There’s nothing happened to him, right?”

Ma hugged me so tight. “I am sorry, Sooyeonie..I am so sorry..”

All hope that I was trying to build as high as the mountain shattered into a thousand pieces once I listened to ma’s word. My dream is ruined. My dream to spend my whole life with Taecyeon crushed. Why do all those hopes disappear so easily, just like that, when our relationship already reached seven years?

I couldn’t hear anything. I can’t think of anything. I looked up at Yunho oppa.

“Is this my punishment for pushing him to far? I-I shouldn’t..”

Ma cried heavily. “No, Sooyeonie. This isn’t your punishment. This is his fate. We couldn’t do anything if it is written that Taec will leave us first,” Yunho oppa tried to reason with me.

I let out a heavy sigh. Still, my tears didn’t come out upon his death.

“I want to see Taec, Yunho oppa. Please take me to mommy’s house. Taec never listened to me. He keeps on speeding.”

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