That night… I couldn’t tell if I were going to be able to talk to Seunghyun again. I felt a wall emerge between the both of us, a barrier in which I’ll have to accept. Although I know that I’m also at fault with what made that obstacle appear, I also knew that there wasn’t supposed to be any harmony between the both of us to begin with.

Seunghyun didn’t understand why, but he found himself standing right at the café, debating whether or not he’d talk with Jiyong. As he thinks clearly about, he hadn’t done anything severe or some sort. They argue but something made a impact at that argument they had yesterday.

“Why do I have the urge to see him right now… to talk to him and ask if he’s fine. I can tell he was but there’s a void in the words he told me about him being fine. I really… don’t understand what’s going on with me lately” he didn’t seem frustrated but instead he felt gloomy.

He took a deep breath before going inside the shop and at the very moment the bell rang, Daesung’s eyes darted towards his direction. With a sharp glare he sensed a huge amount of resentment in his eyes, “Oh boy… what’s wrong with this one?”

When he got closer to the counter, Dae looked away from him and directly showing that he’s not willing to talk or something. “Excuse me… is Jiyong there?” he asked in a low voice, “I’m sorry sir, we’re not a lost and found. Please if you want to find someone go to the police station or hire a detective. At that case you’ll definitely find the person you seek” he retorted disrespectfully.

At some point, Seunghyun expected that Jiyong wasn’t going to work. “I-If that’s the case, then I’ll just drop off at his place” he was about to leave but Dae smacked his hand on the counter, gaining his full attention. “You wouldn’t dare mess around with him once more. Hadn’t you done more than enough trouble for him already?” he blurted.

Hyun couldn’t believe how bold his words were, “Excuse me? Who are you to talk like that to me?” luckily no one was around to witness the whole thing, just that a co-worker that took Ji’s place for a while was the only person watching and hearing them.

He marched right back in front of Daesung and both of them were fuming, “Well if we make it clear, I’m a nobody… a complete stranger, but hell will I sit idle and not speak up for what happened with Jiyong yesterday” he expressed clearly his reasons.

“So you’re saying you’re fussed up with what happened yesterday? Do you even know what happened at that very moment?” he shot back a question. “What’s there to know? That you really were concealing the fact that you have a plan on hurting him so he’d back out from that engagement of yours? You don’t have to bother, once his family knows about what happened this arrangement is not going to continue”

Thought what Daesung said was all true, somehow, those words were starting to bear a toll over him. “Frankly, I found it a good thing for Jiyong at first, I thought that maybe… just maybe he’d be lucky to have someone alongside him and teach him how valuable being in love is… though after hearing that the both of you didn’t get along. I hoped blindly that you were to be the opposite of what had seemed to be, but let’s face it… not everyone gets to experience a happy ending in their life” he concluded.

Seunghyun was lost with words, “You…” he spoke in a calmer way, “When I saw your eyes and heard your voice when we talked about Jiyong, I felt that you have but a small intent to look after him. Even if that was the case, I believed that a person could at least change but… you made me rebuke that belief now”

The whole atmosphere was intense and heavy, none of them spoke for a short period. Right after Seunghyun had found the words to speak out, he raised his head and looked at Daesung straight in the eye, “You’re right… a person can’t change, but a person can always adjust… right now, although I don’t know what compelled me to come here. I felt that a strong force was trying to tell me to find him…”

He trailed off and noticed that Dae was listening carefully, despite the dissatisfaction written all over his face. “I want to speak with him, I want to check up on him” in his words it showed how straight forward he could be but beneath the way it was spoken out, Dae can feel a plea in it.

As Dae calmed down fully from the whole yelling stuff, he recomposed himself “I’ll ask you this… why do you want to see Jiyong?” that very questioned extinguished the tension and made Seunghyun think twice with what really made him decide to find Jiyong “It’s not a hard question… but seeing how things are, I think it’s better you leave Jiyong for a while”

The look on Hyun’s face was devastating, it seemed he got beaten up with just Dae’s words. When he found Hyun not urging to comply with his suggestion, he turned away hoping that he’d leave but even before he made a step forward, “I want to ask him if he’s fine…” he whispered out.

Dae stopped and ce more to see him, “I wanna know whether he’s still hurting or not. I wanna know if he got injured at the whole incident and if he’s still hurt with what I’ve said to him. I want to check up on his status in whether he’s physically or emotionally hurt…” he continued and Dae listened eagerly.

“Honestly, I myself am questioning on why I’m doing this… why my feelings led me here, why my mind wouldn’t cease to think about everything that had occurred… I wanna know why there is a stinging feeling inside this heart of mine right now because I’m starting to go insane with the way it’s hurting me so much. I hate this feeling inside of me but I don’t know how to cure it…”

He could feel the raw emotion that Seunghyun was conveying, the sense of pain was written all over his face and his eyes never seemed to steady. It was clear as day that, he was indeed in a rough situation “But when I think about Jiyong… w-when I think about talking to him… asking him about his condition, the pain lessens even for a short while”

“I thought right at that moment that maybe… there’s a possibility that, if I’d talk to him and see him. I’d be able to get rid of this… that I can once again feel that I’ve been lifted with this unfamiliar feeling that stirred inside of me”

“Right at this moment, I don’t know if what I’m saying is true… I am hurt deep within and there’s no rational explanation that I can concoct to know why I’m feeling this. In a certain way, I am curious about Jiyong’s condition but I’m not concerned, I’m not… just… curious. I just had this need to pry on his situation, that’s all” though a person can never true explain its hearts content, reactions and feelings are the true sign of its real need.

With that Daesung sighed in acknowledgement and acceptance of it. It didn’t seem like an apology but there was a hint of sincerity within it. “All I can say is, it’s better to let things cool down a bit. To make things a lot quiet at the time being” there was disappointment written all over his face, “Don’t worry… Jiyong will be fine”

“Aside from the burn he had yesterday, he also had some bruise on his arm and a cut that made him bleed quite a bit but he’ll be fine. Nothing’s serious with his wounds…” somehow it pulled a few thorns from Hyun’s chest to hear it. “Though with his arms and hand’s injuries, he wouldn’t be able to work for a short while” he felt wrong at holding back the fact that Jiyong was silent when he first tended to his injuries.

That he didn’t cry in pain because of the injury, he cried in anguish as he couldn’t explain why he was numb. Why he was having the need to know why Seunghyun went back for him, why he apologized, why he pulled him back inside his car to talk, why his heart hurt more than anything. Why his heart felt the need to listen to what he has to say.

Daesung was finishing off with the bandages to cover his cuts, with all of a sudden “We fought inside the car about how things should end between the two of us…” he choked out a laugh at what he said but his eyes were far off and Dae just looked at him with concern. “Like there was something between us to begin with…” he joked but didn’t made the other laugh or anything.

“I told him that I could convince my dad to back out from the wedding and surely uncle would understand that we weren’t going to be fine with each other but things didn’t seem to satisfy him. Instead he got mad and told me how worthless my father was and how much of an ingrate I was to his dad” a tear feel from the side as he continued on.

“After hearing such repulsive words from him, I gave him a punch and dashed off… it felt sweet to hit him…” he smiled but his tears began to gush down, “Furthermore, as I think about how irrational he truly was… I got lost inside my head and when I came back to reality, I found myself at the middle of the road with a car fast approaching…” he went on and Dae tried to calm down his crying but massaging his back.

But his cry was unstoppable, the tears were relentless but his expression was like a heartbroken person that got delved into despair. Dae thought it wasn’t possible that Ji would be hurt like that but as what he can see at the moment, it was. “I thought, I’d die at that time… but Seunghyun… came to rescue me at the brink of death and then he pulled me back into his car and apologized on what happened”

“I couldn’t let myself believe that he’d do something like that… I didn’t want to let myself think that I somehow became a concern in his thoughts when I left but I was also afraid to ask him directly on why he came back after me… why he jumped into the fray and made an intervention” Ji looked at him at the worst state that Dae could tell.

Deep inside he wanted to cry along with him, to let him know that he’s there to be alongside him but he figured that if he were to do so, Ji might also think that he’s pitying him. That was the least he’d want to express to him “It’ll be fine… the time will come when you’ll get to talk about it. That you’ll be able to know the intentions behind it” he comforted.

With after what he had heard from Daesung, he went back to his place to get his mind off Jiyong but somehow it didn’t work out that way. Instead there was a stirring feeling inside of him that made him anxious at seeing Jiyong personally. Thought Daesung had made it crystal clear that it’d be for the sake of both of them to not see each other yet, somewhere deep inside there’s still that questionable desire to hear Jiyong’s voice.

“Why not call him?” as question popped out his head, “Surely he wouldn’t answer my call” he answered back, “It’s worth the try… ain’t it” the voice still persisted, “I don’t want to bother doing so… besides, things are still not well enough for the both of us to confront each other” he still reconsidered. “Wait a minute… what’s going on inside this head of mine? Why am I thinking of something like that…” he groaned and rolled around his bed.

“Damn it… I should be hating Jiyong right now for punching me yesterday and saying such rubbish but, there’s no fire in that anger. Lest I’ve started to cultivate a certain amount of concern towards him… wait what?” he brought himself up and sighed heavily.

“I don’t know if I’m starting to be a nut job or something, how can I possibly be concerned with the likes of him? Is he someone important to me?” he tried to rub away the thought. “He's nothing, I should detest him more than ever before for acting out like that…” he stopped as his mind got filled with the thoughts of what had happened.

In a way, even his own rationality turned against him. Slowly he came to understand that Jiyong was only trying to be practical and upfront, he realised that he didn’t intended to make a huge fuss about the whole engagement. It was just that… he dreaded to go further but, maybe Jiyong also wished for his freedom.

He wasn’t sure if that’d be the case, but as he looked closely on how Jiyong looked and felt how he really sounded that time. There was a caring thought behind those words. “Has my anger subside for me to start and act this way?” he himself began to doubt his own conviction.

“Now that I think about it… I was drowning in rage because of what happened between me and Chaerin. Because at some point, my life became dim and a part of me vanished. But that time when I saw Jiyong walked out of the car…” he felt the pain yet again and it was as raw as it can be.

“Although I don’t want to admit it… compared to the pain when Chaerin left, this was a lot excruciating, it was like a stake bore through my chest” he feared what the outcome might be, he was horrified by the reality that may be inevitable to dodge. He felt terrified at the fact that Taeyang could prove his theory right.

He wanted to cage in what was itching to come out from within him, he wanted to never let it shine out of him. Perhaps it would be better if he’d do so.

All the while

Jiyong sat there in his couch, flipping the channels from time to time, not minding what was on. He just wanted something to cover up the thick silence inside the room. He wanted to avert his thoughts about what came over him and Seunghyun.

He was curled up with his chin resting at his knees, he was lost on what to think. There wasn’t any clear trail of thoughts. “Has Seunghyun deliberately said those stuff because he got angry with what may happen with the engagement or was that his true colors towards me? Was it… his heart’s true feelings towards me?”

As painful as it may seem to think like that, nothing positive would result at his point of thought. Since ever since the beginning, he saw inside Seunghyun’s eyes that he held a distance feeling towards him, that he’d never see through the cold look inside those eyes.

He had recalled the time Seunghyun’s eyes seemed inviting and warm, but right after how he could hide such tremendous amount of rage, he wasn’t sure if it was false or actual emotions layered in his way of conveying his expressions. Those smiles he gave out at their first date seemed all so true and heart-filled, that deep within his doubtful mind he wanted to hang on the fact that it was real. At least let it be real, he hoped.

“Seung Ri… if only you were the person that’s at Seunghyun’s place, I wouldn’t be having this difficult dilemma right now. I would’ve felt that I was someone special and someone fragile within your eyes, though words weren’t spoken when we were together. I felt that it had told me how much you deeply feel for me and I know that you felt the same thing when you saw through my eyes”

“Although thinking that there’d still be hope that we’d end up something more than just good friends is a fantasy that I’ve longed for, I can never run from the cold reality that I’m destined to get married with someone my heart feels utterly confused with. A person my heart would never be taken care of with great care”

When everything felt it was pitch black, he’d always feel isolated and cast away. That was the feeling at the moment he’d hoped that Seung Ri would come knocking at his door to tell him that, “It’s alright, you’re safe here… you’re safe within my circle”

That was all he had ever wished to happen.

A few moments later, as he sulked at the feeling of being thrown into the abyss. There was a knock on his door, at first he had thought that maybe it was just a pigment of his imagination. A trick that his head was doing in order for him to cling on his frail desires but when the knock repeated. He knew that it was reality.

He found it odd that someone would knock at his door at the time of the night, but he knows one thing that it wasn’t Seung Ri that was going to sweep him off the dread inside of himself. “Dae isn’t the type of person who knocks and waits for me… who could this be?” he got up from the couch and walked lazily at the door.

Baffled at who it might be, he peered to the peep hole to check on who it was. He found it peculiar because there wasn’t anyone at the front, “I think my mind is messing me up too much…” he was about to set it aside but there another knock sounded out. Thinking that there wouldn’t be any loss to check up on who it was, he opened up the door.

 His eyes couldn’t believe the sight he was seeing right there before him, was it real?

I can’t stand this feeling… I want a cure, I want to relieve myself from this and go on with my life. That’s all I’m pleading out right now, to be back to what I was. Back to the point where there’s no alien feeling lingering from time to time and punish me in a twisted way.

The possibilities are truly endless… along as there’s a percentage in it, there’s always a slim chance but who am I to expect that out of the luck given out to everyone, my luck just beats the odds. Is fate, fiddling with me and sowed such tapestry in my life? How could… this be?

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

I hope there’s a suspense building up on you guys, I made this follow up quite emotional and moving (Well, at my side it was rather moving… :| )it kinda like a roll down of how much their feelings are making them start to move, how their unfound strings in fate starts to show itself to them and lead them to the right track.

Gosh… I’m starting to have a lot of side notes whenever I finish a chapter… >.< but still, I can never stop thanking you guys for continuing on reading along with this. I promise that after this story comes to its end… (Not sure how far it will go though)I shall provide yet another story for you guys to anticipate on.

Care for some scenes at some future chapts or the future story? Or should I just stick with some dramatic mushy stuff? >.< you guys decide, I just love making these to express what’s inside of me.

P.S:      I love you all <3